Disclaimer: Harry Potter is still not mine. And I have very little money so suing me won't get you anywhere, so don't even try, savvy?
A/N: Ok, this is my last chapter before I go away. But it's long, and shippy, and did I mention long? My hands are cramping at the thought of typing it, and I haven't even started yet.
Anyway, as I said I'll be away for a while, but I will continue this fic when I get back, so please don't completely forget about it!
CHAPTER 4: GIRLFRIENDS AND ICE CREAM
Remus woke early the next day. He lay quietly, letting himself be immersed in the soft light of dawn while feelings and images from the night before danced through the head. Anger, and the faces of Sirius's family sneering at him, melted into fear and sadness and the feeling of tears running down his face, which in it's turn changed into the sensation of Sirius all around him, the comfort and desire his friend's body inspired. He closed his eyes as these feelings swirled around his heart, merging into a ball of confusion that settled stubbornly in his stomach.
He opened his eyes and watched the second hand of the clock above his bed tick endlessly around, tirelessly following its circular path, refusing to change it's course for the boy laying unhappily beneath it. Though even if time had wanted to help Remus, it wouldn't have known what to do. Part of him longed for the moment Sirius would awake, but another dreaded the time when he would have to face the rest of the household.
He rested like that, floating alone in a sea of emotion for over two hours before Sirius sat up, rubbing his eyes.
"You awake?" He asked. Remus nodded, leaving his eyes closed.
"I've been up since six."
"You should have woken me up!"
"It's ok." They sat in silence for a few minuets.
"It's early," Sirius said.
"No, really?" Remus replied sarcastically.
"Yeah—yeah, this is good. Let's go get breakfast now, no one else will be up."
"That's nice of you, Sirius, but you shouldn't have to go sneaking around your own home because of me," Remus said, resigned to carry out the course of action he had decided on—he would not be an inconvenience to Sirius, he would deal with whatever happened.
"Remus—it's not like I want to see my family. And I'm hungry, we're getting breakfast now," Sirius said, grabbing Remus's arm and pulling him from the bed.
"Fine-fine. Ow! Let go!"
* * *
Kreature grumbled as he fixed the two boys eggs and bacon, but the food tasted fine, and they were having a very animated conversation about Quidditch when Regulus slipped into the room, hand in hand with Nicole.
"You're up early," he said in a tone that indicated that he took personal offence from the fact.
"So are you," Sirius replied. Nicole's eyes narrowed as she and Regulus slipped into seats across from Remus and Sirius.
"You two are in Gryffindor," she said unpleasantly.
"And you two are in Slytheren," Sirius shot back, matching her tone. Nicole narrowed her eyes even more, and Remus thought it made her look very much like a person who had lost their glasses. He stifled a laugh.
"What's so funny?" Regulus demanded, and Sirius looked questioningly at his friend.
"Nothing," Remus said airily. But then he promptly started laughing again because Nicole had narrowed her eyes some more, and that, combined with the fact that her hair was pulled into a tight bun, made her look precisely like Professor McGonagall would if she had lost glasses. The effect was so pronounced that Sirius caught on and tried unsuccessfully to turn his laugh into a cough.
"What the hell??" Regulus exclaimed.
"Well, if you really must know," Sirius began.
"Oh but, it would hurt their feelings," Remus cut in with mock concern, falling back on the usual Marauder banter as his form of revenge for the night before.
"WHAT?"
"It's just—"
"Your girlfriend—" but they stopped at the look on Regulus's face.
"Don't you dare call her that in this house!" Regulus fumed. Taken aback, Sirius took a moment to respond.
"But she is your girlfriend," he said.
"Don't call her that. Mum will have a fit if she finds out I've been sleeping in the same room as my girlfriend, you know how she is." Sirius nodded, storing this information in the back of his head— such a weapon against his brother would be bound to come in handy.
"Well," he began, "as we were saying, you're, um, friend—"
"Looks—"
"Just like McGonagall,"
"When she's lost her glasses!" Remus finished with a flourish, relishing Regulus's look of furry and the patches of red on Nicole's cheeks.
"How—dare—you—" she sputtered before bursting into indignant tears. The smile began to fade from Remus's face.
"Let's go, Moony," Sirius said, unaffected by the tears. The two walked back of the stairs, Sirius still laughing.
"You know, I think we really upset her," Remus said unhappily when they had reached Sirius's room.
"She deserved it."
"I feel bad." Sirius studied his friend's face. Remus was wearing the expression he wore every time he thought someone had been truly offended or hurt by something he or one of the other marauders said or did. It was an expression he wore a lot, and Sirius knew it as well has he knew the rules of Quidditch—he knew the exact downward curve Remus's lips formed, the way his eyelids fluttered, long lashes wavering above eyes darkened by sorrow and worry. It was this melancholy expression that had first endeared Remus to him—both as a friend and then later as more.
Sirius looked away, breathing heavily as he tried to push down the desire that was raging through his body, he wanted so bad to kiss Remus's, to make all his troubles go away. It was moments like this that Sirius would normally fall back on James or Peter, allowing them to continue the conversation. But now there was no James or Peter.
"She'll be ok, don't worry," he stammered, trying to retain his normal cool. Remus, who had been painfully aware of Sirius's eyes on him was also stammering when he suggested the get started on some of their homework. Sirius readily agreed, and both boys set to the task with vigor, glad to have something to distract them.
* * *
"Done!" Remus declared many hours later, happily throwing down his pen. "Five feet on what has got to be the most boring subject in the history of anything, and I'm done!"
"Yeah-yeah, don't rub it in," Sirius muttered as he rolled up his still incomplete essay on what seemed to him a totally inconsequential piece treaty. "You realize we've been working all day? It's practically time for dinner!"
"Which is good, because I'm starving, we didn't eat lunch," Remus said, jumping to his feet, still elated by the feeling that he had no more history essays to write for two weeks. "Let's go!"
But his euphoria was put to a premature end when he got to the dinner table. The delighted yet sinister smiles plastered across the faces of Regulus and Nicole could, he was certain, mean nothing good. And it didn't take long for this fear to be confirmed. In what must, Remus thought, be an attempt at revenge, Regulus brought up the subject of the night before:
"So you support werewolves rights?" he asked Remus.
"Yes-yes I do," Remus relied coolly, determined not to get upset, although he could already feel this determination slipping. This was the one subject that could always get him off his guard.
"That's disgusting!" Nicole cut in, and Remus had a feeling that this much of the conversation was rehearsed. He flushed but refused to raise to the bait.
"I agree," Ms. Black drawled. "In fact, sometimes I worry about the people you're friends with, Sirius." Sirius stared at her. She often insulted his companions, but to do it in front of Remus seemed like too much. But he caught Remus's eye and his friend gave him a small smile to indicate that it was all right. In fact, Remus was relived that the conversation was straying away from werewolves. Unfortunately, Regulus wasn't going to give up that easily.
"So, what do you think should happen to werewolves mum?" He asked, shooting Remus a nasty glance.
"Well, if it were up to me, the foal creatures would be put into solitary confinement." It was then that the color once again began to drain from Remus's face, and Sirius started to worry. The words if it were up to me, when uttered by his mother, were always followed by a long tirade against the subject at hand. This occasion was no different from the rest.
"In fact," Ms. Black continued happily, "I would love—and I know many sensible wizards who agree—I would love to see them all killed. I certainly support any law that makes it harder for them to get jobs. It's not natural, upstanding wizards working alongside half breads. It's utterly wrong, if I found out one was working with me—if I worked that is--I would certainly quit if my boss refused to fire it. I'm certainly glad that there are none of them in the government. Can you believe people were actually advocating giving one a position on the ministry?"
The flow of hatred went on. By the end Remus was shaking, his eyes full of pain, beyond tears. Sirius knew this look—Remus rarely got it, only when an anti-werewolf law got passed, or when a vehement half-breed hater was appointed a position at the ministry or made a particularly nasty speech. But Sirius had seen the look enough to be frightened of its effects on his friend—the look was always followed by withdrawn silence, a sorrowful moodiness that could go on for days. And Sirius hated his family for putting Remus in such a state. He only vaguely heard Nicole's words of agreement, but his mind latched onto them, quickly planning his revenge.
"You should be glad, Regulus," he drawled, "that your girlfriend gets along so well with our mother."
"His what!?" Ms. Black yelped.
"Girlfriend."
"She is not my girlfriend!"
Remus was hardly aware of the yelling going around him, he thought he heard a plate crash, but he didn't bother to look up. He was already falling into his world of pain, fear and isolation. He felt, an intense feeling that eclipsed all others, that he was different—a freak, hateable. Lost in this feeling, it took him a minuet to realize that Sirius was half caring, half dragging him up the stairs, cursing under his breath. Remus allowed Sirius to continue to support him, not arguing when he was lain on the bed. He nodded feebly when Sirius said he would be right back, not really caring.
Sirius stalked down the stairs. The dinner had broken up—Nicole in tears, insisting she and Regulus were just friends. His mother had been furious with him, convinced, of course, that Sirius was lying. But he didn't care about that. All he cared about was Remus, who seemed to have been hit particularly hard. He knew that if he didn't snap him out of it right away, his friend would be wondering around for days in a pained daze. And words weren't going to help. He reached the kitchen and began collecting what he needed.
Five minuets later he was back in his room, waving a carton of chocolate chip ice cream in front of Remus's face. He had decided that instead of trying to convince Remus to forget what had happened, he would distract him long enough for the shock to ebb some.
"I've got your favorite," he said.
"Not now."
"Yes now," Sirius insisted, opening the carton and sticking the spoon into it. He took a firm hold of Remus's arm and pulled him into a sitting position. "You're eating this if I have to force feed you!"
The shock of Sirius's touch brought Remus out of himself a little. His eyes focused and he became aware of what was around him, namely Sirius, holding a carton of chocolate chip ice cream. He decided that he might give the real world a try.
"I can feed myself, thank you very much," he said, taking the carton.
"Good man," Sirius said, delighted with the apparent success of his plan. He pulled out another spoon. Remus eyed it warily. "What? Did you think I was going to let you eat that all by yourself?" Remus laughed and they set to the ice cream.
"So what happened after you told your mum about Nicole and Regulus?" Remus asked through a mouthful of ice cream. Sirius shrugged.
"She took their side," he said simply. "I can't say I'm surprised."
"I'm not either."
"Finally got a hold of what a delightful woman my mother is, have you?"
"Yeah. And James was right," Remus admitted sheepishly, "she's not a nice person."
"You catch on quick," Sirius said with a smirk. They lapsed into silence, each both boys aware whenever their hands brushed as they devoured the ice cream. The continued like this until there was only a spoonful of ice cream left.
"Who gets the last bight?" Sirius asked casually.
"Well, as I'm the one you're trying to cheer up, that would be me," Remus replied, his spoon already descending into the carton.
"Yeah, but you seem loads better," countered, grabbing Remus's wrist, using his other hand to go for the last bite.
"Oh, no you don't," said Remus with a laugh, grabbing Sirius's free hand. It was then that Remus realized their noses were mere inches apart, he could feel Sirius's breath against his cheeks. Hesitantly he looked up and saw Sirius was looking at him with eye's that mirrored the longing raging in Remus's own chest. Uncertainly, Sirius began to lean forward. Encouraged, Remus followed suit and their lips met.
The kiss began lightly- tentative and frightened. But soon all pretenses fell away and passion took over. Remus felt Sirius lips—soft and sweet from the ice cream, move with his own, he let the taste of Sirius's mouth consume him. Soon Sirius's shirt was off, Remus ran his hands across his smooth skin, delighting in the feel Sirius's body—it's warmth and strength sending thrills up his fingers, spreading through his body like a fire. He didn't even realize Sirius's was removing his shirt until:
"Oh, Remus." Sirius's voice was soft with compassion as his fingers traced the scars that ran along Remus's chest and stomach, the marks of a monthly battle against himself that he had never allowed any of his friends to see. "Do they hurt?" Sirius asked.
"No," Remus replied, and their lips met again.
Slowly passion subsided and they lay down, bodies entwined, Remus's head resting on Sirius's chest.
"I'm feeling much better now," he said with a laugh. Sirius smiled, content with their unspoken agreement: they would, at least for now, go no further than they had, they were both frightened of doing anything to quickly. It's enough, Sirius thought, just to have Remus in my arms. It was with a smile that he drifted into sleep.
A/N: Wow, this chapter is two pages longer than the last one. I really wish I could type faster, it took a ridiculously long time to get this all onto the computer. Anyway, PLEASE review *puppy eyes*