Logan still couldn't remember the Stryker from his forgotten past.
Sometimes, he could feel something pushing at the edges of his
consciousness but if he tried to grasp it, it would disappear into
nothingness. It was so frustrating. He still hadn't recovered from what
Stryker had told him about his past. He couldn't believe that he had
actually volunteered for the Weapon X project, that he and Stryker might
have once been friends, that he had once been an animal, that Stryker had
just given him the claws.. It was too difficult to comprehend. Logan had
always known he was an animal - the Wolverine that raged within was a
constant reminder of that but he had always assumed that the animal had
established itself to protect the man from danger when they woke up in the
Canadian wilderness 15 years ago. The animal had taken control. Logan would
surface rarely. Marie had changed that, had changed him, as had the X-Men.
Logan had realized that when Stryker had given him a choice. He had
realized that he needed the X-Men, his friends in order to be the man he
wanted to be but he still felt corrupt. He still felt dirty and unworthy,
he was still afraid that they would reject him when they saw what he was.
All those feelings had surfaced when Logan had heard Stryker's voice, heard his taunts. His primal reaction was screaming at him to kill this man but something had stopped him, forced him to sheath his claws. Maybe some subconscious programming he endured, he thought in hindsight. All Logan could remember was a deep fear that took hold of him as the man had walked towards him, as Logan finally saw his face, realized that this man was the key to his past, his identity, that this man knew his past self better than anybody else. The face was the trigger, it was the face that had haunted his dreams that night, the only unmasked face of all the anonymous doctors, the man had wanted Logan to see his face and it all came rushing back to Logan as he stood there staring, took a step closer only to find some sort of haze floating and expanding in his vision, separating him from Stryker. He had felt desperate then, reaching up a hand to touch it he had realized it was ice, had prepared to shred it to pieces, this obstacle to his past, only to hear Maries voice. He had focused then, had sensed her absolute terror and fear. He had told her to go, that he would be all right but he remembered his promise to her as she yelled at him "but we won't!". Had realized that protecting her was more important than this, he owed her more than this man.
They had gone to Boston. Logan knew the professor was in trouble if the house had been attacked and he recalled what Jean had told him about her mission with Ororo. Marie had rode shotgun and he had again been acutely aware of her presence beside him. Of what she was or to be more accurate was not wearing he thought with a grin. He had sensed her nervousness that so much skin was so exposed, noticed her fiddling with something on her wrist and with a shock realized they were his dog tags. He had enough time to register that she must never take them off before she noticed what he was staring at and had promptly given them back. He hadn't wanted her to give them back but he realized she understood the gravity of what had just happened to him and was looking for some gesture to show she understood. Pyro was right, there was an uncomfortable silence, and the tension between the two of them was unbelievable as was what was radiating from Bobby in the back seat.
They had arrived in Bobby's house and the kid and Marie had gone to find her some clothes, much to Logan's relief. Bobby's parents had come home though and that had complicated things. That Pyro kid had had a major attitude. Logan had sensed his jealously towards Bobby, it might have been due to the evident closeness of Bobby to his family but Logan suspected hidden feelings for Marie might also have something to do with it. Bobby had to put up with the usual stupid questions from his parents; his brother had sulked in the corner and Logan had to fend off questions as to what his motives were. Marie had really impressed him though, the way she stood up for Bobby. That kid was like a miniature Cyclops - he had no goddamn balls. Logan knew he'd never do anything to hurt Marie so he didn't really mind. He had breathed a huge sigh of relief when Jeannie had called on Cykes gadget; it was a relief to know he wasn't alone in this anymore. When the cops had arrived, Logan didn't have a clue what he was going to do - he just hoped Jean would get there in time. The last thing he remembered before he blacked out was Marie screaming as the bullet hit his temple. She probably knew he was ok, was probably just trying to distract the cops as he healed but he didn't like her screaming - it reminded him of the time at the Statue of Liberty too much.
He had woken up to the smell of burning and charred metal and flesh, he was aware that Marie was panting beside him and that Pyro was collapsed on the ground behind him. The goddamn fire kid had lost the plot and let loose, it looked like Marie had used her powers to stop him. Logan still couldn't understand why Bobby hadn't used his powers, it would have been the obvious thing to do but he reckoned the kid was traumatized by his brothers' betrayal to think straight. He'd never been so glad to see Jeannie in his life, things were bad but at least they'd be safe until they figured things out.
All those feelings had surfaced when Logan had heard Stryker's voice, heard his taunts. His primal reaction was screaming at him to kill this man but something had stopped him, forced him to sheath his claws. Maybe some subconscious programming he endured, he thought in hindsight. All Logan could remember was a deep fear that took hold of him as the man had walked towards him, as Logan finally saw his face, realized that this man was the key to his past, his identity, that this man knew his past self better than anybody else. The face was the trigger, it was the face that had haunted his dreams that night, the only unmasked face of all the anonymous doctors, the man had wanted Logan to see his face and it all came rushing back to Logan as he stood there staring, took a step closer only to find some sort of haze floating and expanding in his vision, separating him from Stryker. He had felt desperate then, reaching up a hand to touch it he had realized it was ice, had prepared to shred it to pieces, this obstacle to his past, only to hear Maries voice. He had focused then, had sensed her absolute terror and fear. He had told her to go, that he would be all right but he remembered his promise to her as she yelled at him "but we won't!". Had realized that protecting her was more important than this, he owed her more than this man.
They had gone to Boston. Logan knew the professor was in trouble if the house had been attacked and he recalled what Jean had told him about her mission with Ororo. Marie had rode shotgun and he had again been acutely aware of her presence beside him. Of what she was or to be more accurate was not wearing he thought with a grin. He had sensed her nervousness that so much skin was so exposed, noticed her fiddling with something on her wrist and with a shock realized they were his dog tags. He had enough time to register that she must never take them off before she noticed what he was staring at and had promptly given them back. He hadn't wanted her to give them back but he realized she understood the gravity of what had just happened to him and was looking for some gesture to show she understood. Pyro was right, there was an uncomfortable silence, and the tension between the two of them was unbelievable as was what was radiating from Bobby in the back seat.
They had arrived in Bobby's house and the kid and Marie had gone to find her some clothes, much to Logan's relief. Bobby's parents had come home though and that had complicated things. That Pyro kid had had a major attitude. Logan had sensed his jealously towards Bobby, it might have been due to the evident closeness of Bobby to his family but Logan suspected hidden feelings for Marie might also have something to do with it. Bobby had to put up with the usual stupid questions from his parents; his brother had sulked in the corner and Logan had to fend off questions as to what his motives were. Marie had really impressed him though, the way she stood up for Bobby. That kid was like a miniature Cyclops - he had no goddamn balls. Logan knew he'd never do anything to hurt Marie so he didn't really mind. He had breathed a huge sigh of relief when Jeannie had called on Cykes gadget; it was a relief to know he wasn't alone in this anymore. When the cops had arrived, Logan didn't have a clue what he was going to do - he just hoped Jean would get there in time. The last thing he remembered before he blacked out was Marie screaming as the bullet hit his temple. She probably knew he was ok, was probably just trying to distract the cops as he healed but he didn't like her screaming - it reminded him of the time at the Statue of Liberty too much.
He had woken up to the smell of burning and charred metal and flesh, he was aware that Marie was panting beside him and that Pyro was collapsed on the ground behind him. The goddamn fire kid had lost the plot and let loose, it looked like Marie had used her powers to stop him. Logan still couldn't understand why Bobby hadn't used his powers, it would have been the obvious thing to do but he reckoned the kid was traumatized by his brothers' betrayal to think straight. He'd never been so glad to see Jeannie in his life, things were bad but at least they'd be safe until they figured things out.