"Is she here yet?"
"No."
"When will she get here?"
"Soon."
"How soon?"
"Very soon, I hope."
"Do you think she brought lots of presents?"
"I know she brought presents for Natalie because it's her birthday."
"What about me?"
"I'm sure she brought you something nice too."
"How nice exactly?"
"Emma, sweetheart," Donna turned to face her daughter, trying to hide her impatience at the child. "Remember that talk we had about asking people lots of questions?"
"Yes."
"Remember how I said that people don't always like to be asked question after question after question?"
"Yes."
"And that sometimes when they hear too many questions in a row, they get the urge to hit themselves over the head with something heavy?"
"Yes."
"Well Mommy's about ready to beam herself in the back of the head with this metal spoon, baby," Donna said, holding up the large spoon in front of Emma. "Do you understand what that means?"
"That I should probably go bug Aunt Nicole and Toby right now?" Emma ventured a guess.
"That's my girl," her mother smiled at her as she quickly kissed the top of her head before Emma scampered out of the kitchen. On her way out, she nearly collided with her uncle T.J. as he came into the room.
"Where's the fire?" he called out to his niece as she ran out into the hallway. "Do you need any help?" he asked his older sister.
"Yeah, can you finish the salad?" she directed him to the half-finished salad before turning back to the main course.
T.J. peered over her shoulder. "What the hell is that?" he asked, pointing into the pot.
"Spaghetti in the big pot and a garlic and pesto sauce in the small one," she replied in a clipped tone.
"It smells awful," he grimaced, inhaling a whiff of the odor from the sauce. "Are sure you're making it right?"
"I'm doing exactly as the cookbook instructs me to."
"So it's supposed to smell like something that's been in my gym bag since the mid 1980s."
"In theory, I suppose so. Now will you stop hovering and make the damn salad!"
"All right, geez," he acquiesced, going back to his task. As he prepared the salad, he glanced back over his shoulder and saw Donna working frantically on the rest of the dinner with a nervousness she didn't usually exude. "What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing, nothing is wrong at all," she was quick to reply, still stirring and checking the food as she did. "Why would you think that?"
"I don't know, you seem a little jittery that's all."
"Well I have no reason to be jittered. There is no earthly reason on Earth why I should be feeling jittery right now, right?" she asked him nervously. "I mean, why should I be jittered? After all, this is a great day for me; it's my daughter's second birthday. I should be feeling happy and excited, which I am by the way," she pointed out to him.
"Okay," T.J. replied to appease her as he continued to chop up vegetables.
"I'm going to be surrounded by dear family members and friends, some of whom I haven't seen in ages, like Charlie and Zoey for example," she prattled on. "I haven't seen them since Josh was elected last year. And Mena was here this week and that was just so fabulous to see her again and catch up. I mean, really I'm one huge ball of excitement and happiness that's ready to burst!"
"So when's Josh's mother getting here again?" T.J. asked nonchalantly. When he didn't get an answer after a few minutes, he turned around to see Donna hunched over the counter, her shoulders shaking with the unmistakable sound of sobs. He hastily stopped what he was doing and rushed to take his sister in his arms. "What is it? What's wrong, Donna?"
"Oh, what isn't wrong?" she bemoaned as she pulled back from him.
T.J. grabbed a dishrag and blotted gently at her eyes. "Well perhaps we should zero in on the problem that's turned you into such a basket case," he suggested.
"She's got to hate me so much," Donna sighed, taking the cloth from her brother and trying to clean herself up a little bit.
"Who does?"
"Josh's mother," she explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"What could you have possibly done to make her…oh that's right," T.J. said as it came to him. "The leaving…with the kids and all."
"Yeah," she sighed miserably.
"You're right, I can understand that." Donna turned back to finishing the pasta so T.J. went back to the salad. "So you've talked to her about it, and she said that she hates you?"
"No," she admitted.
"Then, Josh has talked to her and told you that she hates you?"
"No."
"Emma told you that she hates you?"
"No!" she huffed in annoyance as she went to strain the pasta in the sink. "Of course she hasn't."
"Then why do you think that--?"
"Well, wouldn't you?" she asked him pointedly, her back to him. "If a woman stole your grandchildren from their father, your son, for a month without so much as a phone call, wouldn't you be pissed at her too?"
He stared at her back, taught with anxiety and frustration, and felt a wave of pity for her wash over him. Donna, it always seemed to him, had to carry the weight of the world on her chest. "I don't know what to say to make you feel better, Bella," he replied going over to her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders, placing a kiss on the side of her head. "But if I knew what it was, I'd shout it from the Empire State Building."
Donna let out a chuckle, patting his forearm. "You're a sweetheart, baby brother," she told him. "How the hell did that happen?"
"I know, it's weird, considering how I used to kick my older sisters' asses on a regular basis," he said pleasantly, moving his arms up to lock her in chokehold.
"No!" she screeched laughingly, backing them up into the middle of the kitchen to avoid any household accidents. She wiggled against him with all her might, but she had nothing on her weight lifting, exercise-fiend of a younger brother. "Stop! Truce, truce!"
"Eh, maybe later," he grunted out as he alternately squeezed neck and tickled her ribs.
"I'll tell on you, you brat!"
"Yeah, who?"
"Nico--!" she started to shout before T.J.'s hand clamped over her mouth. In that instance, she managed to break free from his other arm and moved to the other side of him. She grabbed the first thing off the counter she could find and held it in front of her to defend herself with.
He had to laugh at her. "You're going to whisk me into submission?" he mocked her.
"That," Donna taunted, "or I'll tell Mena which one of us really lost their virginity at midnight Mass when they were fourteen."
He debated it for less than a second. "Truce?" he offered, sticking out his hand.
She shook it firmly. "Truce," she accepted, going back over to the food as if nothing had happened.
"Seriously though, Bella, the thing with Josh's mom," he tried to explain to her as he added dressing to his contribution to dinner, "it's going to be okay. She loves you like a daughter; she's not going to forget that."
"I hope you're right," she said. "I've got more than enough on my mind right now without having to deal with a wicked mother-in-law."
"Such as?" he asked, going to the fridge to grab a beer. "You want one?"
"No thanks," she shook her head. "I've just got stuff that needs to be done around here and with the magazine…"
"Oh yeah, Nic told me. They ended up pushing back the launch date, right?"
"Right, the first issue will be published about six months from now."
"A whole six months? What happened?" he asked, hopping up on the counter next to her.
"Financial stuff mostly," she answered, adding some basil to the food. "The economy is bad, and the accountants and Lily figure it's cheaper to put everything on hold for now and lose a little money rather than publish two months from now and lose everything."
"That is why I like freelancing; you get to make your own hours and wages while you let the magazine people worry about the bottom line," he took a swig of beer and set his bottle down. It hit something and knocked it to the ground. "What's that?"
"Nothing," Donna quickly replied, bending down to fetch the object,
"What is that? A thermometer?" T.J. asked when she was upright.
'Damn it,' she thought. "Yes, it is," she said, setting it down on the other counter, hoping he'd just let it go.
But it was not to be. "Why do you keep that in the kitchen?" he asked, leaning back against the cupboards.
"Because I was using it before while I made dinner," she said, mixing up the pasta a bit more while avoiding eye contact.
"Are you sick?"
"Of you and Emma tag-teaming me with questions, yes I am," she said matter-of-factly. She speared up a small forkful of pasta and held it up to his lips. "Taste."
"I'm not eating that Donna," he protested, pushing her hand away.
"Taste."
"It smells like feet."
"T.J., just taste it."
"You taste it, it's your mea--" he was cut off when Donna shoved the pasta into his open mouth. His natural instincts of chewing and swallowing quickly took over as he contemplated the food he was eating. "Know what's weird?" he asked after he was done.
"What?"
"How something that smells so, so wrong can taste so, so right," he grinned taking the fork from her and reaching into the bowl. "Gimme some more of that."
"It's good?"
"Oh yeah," he replied around a mouthful of pasta. He waited until he swallowed before continuing, "Now again, are you sick or not?"
"No I'm not," she groaned, wishing he'd let up on this.
"Then why are you using a thermometer in your kitchen for yourself and not your kids?"
She looked him over, at his steadfast gaze and determined posture, and knew he wasn't going to give up until he had the truth. She nervously cleared her throat. "You really want know?"
"Yes I do, as a matter of fact," he replied, putting another forkful of into his mouth.
"I'm trying to figure out if I'm ovulating or not, so I can determine the optimum time for conception so Josh and I can have sex."
As soon as the words left her mouth, T.J. started chocking violently. He groped around until he found some napkins and spit the food into it before reaching for his beer to rinse his mouth out. Donna could only look on with a partially embarrassed but mostly amused expression etching her face.
"Okay," he finally said a little hoarsely. "I'm going to take my beer, I'm going to go into the other room, drink it all down, and forget that I heard those words ever come out of your mouth."
"Can you take the salad out with you?" she asked, holding out the bowl for him.
"Sure," he said, grabbing the bowl and not looking her in the eyes.
"T.J.," she called out when he was at the doorway.
"Yeah?"
"I'm going to have sex with my husband sometime today."
"You are such a bitch," he whined in agony as he went into the dining room.
"And I love you too, baby brother," she goaded him sweetly. She went to wash her hands in the sink. "Oh yes, I truly do."
"Truly do what?"
Donna froze on the spot, the icy water from the faucet running down her hands, but she hardly noticed. 'Oh God,' she thought, horrified at being caught so off-guard. She'd thought when she'd face Dr. Rachel Lyman again, she'd be prepared and calm, not trembling like a leaf; evidently, she'd thought wrong.
"H…hi Rachel," Donna whispered, stealing a quick look at herself in the window above the sink to make sure she was somewhat presentable. Shutting off the faucet, she slowly turned and looked straight into the face of her mother-in-law, standing across the room. She still wore her raincoat, so she must have just arrived from the airport with Josh. The Florida sun had colored her cheeks a light pink against her tan skin, and her red tresses showed only a few lines of gray. Donna smiled tightly while searching her mother-in-law's face for a sign, an indication, of what she was feeling at that moment. Looking closely, she thought she could detect what might a hint of nervousness in her brown eyes, but Donna couldn't imagine why she would be. "Did you just get here?"
"A few minutes ago actually, my grandchildren held me hostage before my son directed me towards the kitchen."
"I see."
"So," Rachel shrugged, playing with the ties on her coat, "how are you, Donna?"
"I'm good, thank you," Donna said, pulling her hair back behind her ears. "And you?"
"Oh, I'm just fine," she quickly answered.
"Good." Donna crossed her arms and leaned back against the sink while Rachel shuffled her feet and looked around the kitchen.
"Have you remodeled this room?" she suddenly asked, without much interest.
"Nope, same old kitchen that was here the last time you were up."
Rachel nodded slowly. "Yes, I see it is."
The silence encircled the two women for a minute or so, both believing they knew why they were seesawing back and forth between one another without any real purpose or motivation.
"Your classes are going well?" Donna asked, staring at the floor.
"I'm sorry?"
"I asked if your classes were going well," she repeated loudly.
"Yes, they're going just fine," Rachel responded, flicking at her nails.
'This is insane,' Donna thought. 'We shouldn't be tiptoeing around this like a couple of children; we're adults for God's sake.' "Look Rachel," Donna began, gathering her courage, "we need to talk about--"
"Oh Donna, I'm so sorry," the older woman cried out as she walked over to Donna and wrapped her arms around the confused woman. She pulled back slightly, not acknowledging or noticing her daughter-in-law's puzzlement. "It was so wrong of me not to…I don't know what I was thinking…I just hope you can forgive me, Donna," she whimpered, kissing Donna's cheek.
"Rachel, Rachel what are you talking about?" Donna pulled back from her, having no idea whatsoever what Rachel was apologizing for. "Why are you sorry?"
Rachel stroked her cheek affectionately. "Because I wasn't there for you," her Yiddish accent even more prominent when she was emotional. "You came back, and I just never called, or wrote, or did anything. You needed me to be there for you, and I wasn't."
"Oh no, Rachel, I'm not angry with you," Donna went back to hug her, trying to comfort her. "I never was, not even for minute. Why would you think that?"
"I'm an old Jewish mother, parental guilt is my vice," she sighed, pulling back again. She smoothed Donna's hair back and looked deep into her eyes, motherly love lit behind them. "Still, I should have done something, but my idiot son said you two needed time for yourselves and the girls."
"We did," she told Rachel. "I understand why he told you that, please don't feel guilty about it."
"Donna, didn't you just hear me say I'm an old Jewish mother?" she teased. She wiped at the glistening tears in her eyes, patting Donna's shoulders as she pulled back to take her coat off and hang it on a chair.
"You know actually, Rachel, I thought you were going to be mad at me," Donna said timidly, looking down at her hands. "For leaving with the girls and all."
The elder Lyman woman's face took on a pensive expression, lips pursed together and eyes starting at the wall to the side of her. She stayed that way for a moment or two, seemingly deep in thought before she finally spoke again to a tense Donna. "We all make mistakes," she began softly but with force, "especially when love is involved. What you did to my Joshua was cruel and heartless. It killed me, as a mother, that you could hurt my boy like that." Her harsh words were softened as she smiled kindly at Donna. "But then again, you're also my daughter, just as much as Josh is my son. I could never not forgive you for anything, Donna, anything." Rachel cleared her throat, clearly a little uncomfortable, as she patted the tabletop. "But that is all in the past and we're here to celebrate my granddaughter today, so let's get this show on the road. I brought some desserts with me; do you have some platters I could use?"
"Sure," she replied, intuitively sensing that this was the end of that conversation, period. Rachel forgave and any explanations on Donna's part wouldn't matter to her. She appreciated her mother-in-law's honesty but more than her approval, she was grateful she still had Rachel's love and devotion on her side. "What did you bring?"
"Some éclairs for Emma, because you can never have too much chocolate as child," Rachel warned, unwrapping foil while Donna got the trays. "And some baklava for Josh, because I'd never hear the end of it if I didn't have this with me."
"How do you make such a fabulous baklava?" Donna admired. "Josh has raved about this since before I knew him; I've been trying to make this ever since he and I got married and I still can't get right. Please tell me you're leaving me the recipe in your will."
"Do you want it now?" Rachel asked with a glint in her eye. Donna nodded enthusiastically as her mother-in-law leaned in conspiratorially. "Poppadorius Bakery, 400 Yorkshire Drive, Chicago IL, and ask for Elena. Overnight mail, perishables, and make sure you put the box at the bottom of the garbage can."
"Oh, you are sneaky."
"I learned it from my mother-in-law, who learned it from hers, and I continue the tradition with you as you will someday with your daughter-n-law."
"If I ever get one, that is."
"Well, maybe this one you're trying for now will be a boy," Rachel smirked as she pointed at Donna's stomach.
She just rolled her eyes. "And Josh calls me the blabbermouth," she snarked as she realized what had happened. "He told you on the way here?"
"He's just excited, he's always wanted a big family," she defended her son.
"So do I." She set about getting napkins and the pasta finished before she noticed Rachel staring at her oddly. "What?"
"Are you…?" she asked, gesturing to Donna's stomach.
"I don't think so, not yet."
"But you are trying, right?"
"Yes," Donna replied, getting a trifle embarrassed.
"Are you having problems?" Rachel eyed her curiously.
"You know, I don't know. I've never actively tried to get pregnant before, Rachel, it just always seemed to happen," she said, now noticeably blushing.
"Well you have to be careful," the older woman counseled. "There are certain positions that make it--"
"Rachel, I'm very glad that your encouraging this and all," Donna broke in, slightly pained, "but this is one those things where you might be…"
"Grossing you out with sex advice?"
"A little bit, yeah.
"Say no more; I will leave the baby making to you and your husband," she promised.
"Thank you," Donna breathed a sigh of relief.
"But if I'm not holding a new grandchild in my arms this time next year, I guarantee nothing," she vowed, picking the pasta bowl from Donna. "Now let's eat so we can have cake, and then we can do presents where I'll show my granddaughters why I'm their favorite." Rachel went to set up in the dining room while Donna went into the living room to show their assorted guests to dinner. Nicole and Toby were there along with T.J. and Ellie, who had Shawn on her hip. Bobby and Helen were there with Freddie, who was currently playing what looked like an intense game of Go Fish with Emma. Charlie and Zoey Young were there, Zoey's pregnancy just beginning to show as she reached her fourth month. Jed Bartlet had been feeling under the weather so he'd stayed in Manchester, with his eldest daughter's family visiting. And at last, coming down the stairs with her father, was the birthday girl. Natalie made a beeline for her mother and Donna picked her up as everyone made their way into the dining room. "Hey you," she addressed her husband when the room had cleared, save them and their daughter. "Do me a favor?"
"What?" he asked innocently.
"Please wait until we actually conceive the child before you spill the beans to your mother next time," she told him, smacking his shoulder.
"Oww!" he whined, rubbing his arm. "What did she do to you, give you a lecture on names?"
"No, but she was about to give me advice on which positions to use to best facilitate conception."
"Okay, I did not need to hear that," he groaned as she pushed past him to go into the dining room.
"What is it with guys and hearing about the schematics of child conception that makes you all go green around gills?" she asked as the entered the noisy dining room.
"Well it's not that we don't love the after part," Josh said, leaning down to kiss Natalie's head, "but it's best for all parties involved that the before part be a don't ask, don't tell situation."
"You," she pulled him close for a kiss, "are a strange, strange man."
"Who is also hungry, so let's eat." They joined the rest of the party at the dining room table and proceeded to enjoy a hearty meal, surrounded by loved ones and lively conversation. When everyone finished, Donna went into the kitchen to retrieve the cake while Josh hit the lights and prepared the baby for her big moment.
"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Natalie. Happy birthday to you," everyone sang to her as the glowing cake was set in front of her. Donna was about to set the cake in front of her when Rachel suddenly stood up.
"Excuse me everyone," she announced politely. "Could you all just humor me for one moment? Donna, could you bring the cake down here in front of me; Joshua, bring me my grandbaby." Although they were a little confused, they granted Rachel her wish and brought both the baby and the cake to her. "Emma, my love, come stand over here with me," she motioned for the girl, who immediately went to her grandmother's side.
"What is it, Grandma?" Emma asked, standing next to her grandmother's chair.
Rachel squeezed Emma against her and held Natalie close. "Oh my angels, my two precious angels," she cooed to them, seemingly oblivious of the other people looking on at her curiously. "I just wanted to tell you both something, a little story, before we blew out the candles. When I was around you're age, Emma, I lived in a place called Germany. I lived there with my Mama and my Papa and I was so happy there it made me dizzy sometimes. Then one day…" she paused and unconsciously pulled the two children a little closer to her before going forward, "I was celebrating my sixth birthday when these mean, mean men came into the house and made my parents and I pack up a few things and leave our house forever."
"Why'd they do that?" Emma asked naively.
"Um Emma…" Josh tried to cut in and explain but his mother stopped him.
"Emma, my darling, there are certain things in life that we learn about as we get older and I promise you that that will be one of them. When you are ready, I will explain it to you as best I can. But to answer your question for now, some people in this world are not good and nothing can change that. The best we can do is learn from it, so we can help make sure that no one else is like that." She rubbed Emma's back lovingly as she continued. "But back to my story, we had to leave our home and we never got to go back. After a few years, we were able to come here to live in America. My mama and papa went to live in Heaven soon after that, so I was very sad for a long, long time after that until one wonderful day when I was seventeen and I met someone very special. You know who I met, Natalie?"
"I dunno," the girl replied, scrunching up her face in the adorable way that only children can.
"I met your Grandpa Noah, in New York, on a double date where I was paired with his friend, a lanky, good-looking Irishman in the Air Force," she said, with a wink in Josh's direction. He rolled his eyes, having heard the story countless times growing up from his father on their anniversary. "But anyways, a few months later I married him. And then eventually, your daddy was born and I was so, so happy that I was dizzy again." She tactfully left out the mention of Josh's older sister. He'd decided that he'd tell the girls about her himself one day, when they could understand why she'd died. "And I guess what I want you girls to understand is that there was a long time after my last birthday in Germany when Grandma wasn't happy. But I want you both to know that I will do everything in my power to make sure all your birthdays, and every other day in between, are happy too." All the other adults in the room silently agreed with that sentiment, each wanting these two little girls to have all the joys that life had to offer them. "Now can I get some 'I love you's'?" she asked her granddaughters.
"I love you, Grandma," Emma told her, wrapping her arms around her neck.
"Love you, Gamma," Natalie offered her as well.
"Oh I love you too. Can I have some kisses please?" She pelted both girls with kisses until Natalie was squirming against her.
"Cake! Cake!" she demanded, hitting her little fists on the table, trying to reach the large chocolate cake that so close to her.
"Well my grandbaby has demanded cake so cake she shall have," Rachel decreed. She turned the baby to face the cake. "Okay ready? One, two, three blow!" Instead of a blow, Natalie let out a cough but the end result was the same. Everyone cheered for the little girl and her grandmother squeezed her back against her chest, closing her eyes and whispering softly, "Happy, happy birthday, little one."
Later that night, when the guests had all left and the girls and Rachel were settled in bed, Josh and Donna were lying underneath the blankets of their bed. They'd laid there quietly together, Donna settled against Josh's chest, and hoped that their last two rounds of sex had been fruitful.
"That was so sweet, what your mother said tonight before the cake," Donna commented sleepily. "Telling the girls those things was…so her. Did she do stuff like that when you were little?"
"No," he admitted, playing with a lock of her hair. "She worked a lot when I was a kid and we didn't really get along as well as we do now."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be, it's in the past."
"It won't be like that with our kids," she assured him as the temptation of sleep began to pull her in.
"You think so?"
"Know so," she whispered as the beating of Josh's strong heart lulled her into dreams.
"I'm just asking because with the Senate and hopefully the White House, I won't have as much time to…" he trailed off as he caught the sound of her light snoring. He chuckled quietly and placed a kiss on the crown of her head, lingering there. He closed his eyes and tried to join his wife but something kept him awake, a strange urge he'd never really felt before. Glancing down to make sure she was really asleep, he slowly turned her body over until she was resting flat on her back. Crawling down her body until he was eyeing her flat stomach, he made sure Donna was still asleep before beginning quietly, "Hey you, I think. Um okay so I'm not sure if you're in there yet or not and if you are, just listen up and if you're not, it won't really matter because I'm talking to nothing. There are some things you need to know: A.) I'm your dad so, you know, hi; B.) If you're in there now, you're kind of a," he searched for the right word, "second chance for your mom and me. You see we went through some rough times before we decided to have you and you're gonna be the first sign of the new love and commitment we have for one another. I'm not trying to get you down or make you worry about anything, I'm just saying that's what happened; and finally C.) With a lot of work and little luck from a higher power, I'm going to be President of the United States one day. That doesn't mean anything to you now but it will someday and I just want to apologize in advance if you don't think I spend enough time with you when you're out of your mom. I'll do my very best to always be there for you, your mom, and your siblings but I can't promise anything in that department. Just always know…" He splayed his hand soothingly against Donna's skin. "I love you, even now I love you, and nothing will ever change that." He started to close his eyes, comforted at having said what he needed to say before another thought occurred to him. "Oh by the way," he continued, "if you're a boy, not to put any pressure on you or anything, but I know a guy pretty high up in the Met's farm system. Just for future reference, that's all. So…goodnight." He settled back up on the pillows, his eyes starting to close and his body starting to relax.
"You know before," he heard a voice whisper, "when I said what your mother did was sweet? That had nothing on that little episode of 'Father Knows Best'." He opened his eyes and saw Donna's face, grinning back at him.
"You were eavesdropping on a private conversation just now, Donnatella," Josh tried to scold her. "You were being nosy right then."
"You might not have been talking to anything, Joshua," she mentioned as she moved her body on top of his again, plotting kisses on his neck as she went.
"I have faith," he smiled as his hands drifted down her body.
"And I'm not questioning that," Donna mumbled as she kissed her way up to his mouth. "I'm just saying that a little insurance never hurt anyone."
"Well, if you think we must," Josh sighed in mock annoyance.
"Oh I think we must," Donna agreed as she pounced on her husband.