Part 7

"Marie!"

Susan stumbled across the bridge, her legs giving way beneath her so that she landed on her knees beside the pilot's chair. Desperately, she shook the woman, looking for a response; any response.

"Marie! Wake up!" She yelled. "Marie!"

Nothing.

Susan stared in disbelief. This couldn't be happening again. She couldn't lose another person that she cared about; no way could she be that unlucky; could she? Was she still cursed to live out her life alone and unloved?

She reached out and caressed Marie's face. Life was so unfair. She had only just begun to learn about this young woman, so hopeful even after all that life had thrown at her. Now her dreams would be unrealised. She hadn't even signed up for this battle; it was only by Susan's invitation that she had been on the Titans at all.

Susan began to cry. It was all her fault.

A bright flash from outside the ship penetrated her grief.

"My God!" someone gasped, "They've rammed it."

Susan stared blindly out of the viewscreen. What was happening?

"Captain," Lieutenant Collins was beside her, "We have to get out. It's collapsing."

She could see the deathcloud's missiles firing and exploding. One narrowly missed the Titans. One of the Alliance destroyers had turned and was coming towards them. Susan hazily took it all in, but her mind refused to process any rational thoughts.

With his captain's silence, Collins took control. He looked at the young woman in the pilot's chair. Was she dead?

He felt for a pulse whilst he leaned his cheek close to her mouth.

There! The very slight movement of air confirmed it. She was breathing.

He signalled to another crewman to help him lift Marie from the chair.

"Gently," he ordered, "She's still alive."

The phrase entered Susan's mind like a ppg blast, the shockwave of relief nearly making her black out. Alive. Marie was alive. She sat on the floor and closed her eyes. She wasn't cursed.

Another explosion sent a shudder through the ship and brought Susan back to her senses. She had to get her crew to safety.

"Let me take her," she said to Collins, relieving him of Marie's unconscious form, "Get us out of here; full speed."

The Lieutenant was in the pilot's seat before she had finished and turning the ship. Alongside the Excalibur, they raced for the join in the deathcloud's superstructure, barely making it through the diminishing gap. The deathcloud exploded behind them.

"Good flying Collins." She said, then looked down at Marie cradled in her arms. She could see now the small movement of her chest as she breathed. "We did it Marie," she whispered, "We saved the Earth."

OoOoO

But they hadn't.

It was later that Susan learnt of the Drakh plague. The scientists were still analysing it when the news reached the fleet of the quarantine. She immediately granted access to all the crew to contact any relatives or friends that they had on Earth. She only knew Stephen, and as he was likely to be busy, she didn't try and reach him. There would be time for that later.

Most of the time that they remained in Earth's orbit, Susan was in the medbay with Marie. It was there that Sheridan found her the day after the Drakh attack.

"How is she?" he asked after he had hugged Susan, "I came across as soon as I saw her name on the list of injured."

Susan looked at Marie. She was sleeping now, her calm appearance belying how serious her condition really was.

"Concussion, a gash to the head and a few flash burns." Susan made light of the injuries. No need to have Sheridan worrying unnecessarily. "My doctor says that she will be able to get up in a couple of days, if she takes it easy."

"It sound's like she was lucky." John said.

"She's as tough as her Father," Susan observed, "And you know what it took to get rid of him."

John studied Susan, unsure as to what she meant by that statement, but she was smiling, lost in her own thoughts. He decided not to inquire further, but it was an improvement over the last time they had met. She was more like her old self.

"Can I speak to her?" He asked, indicating Marie.

"Of course." She gently shook the younger woman. "You have a visitor." Susan said as Marie stirred.

"Who?" Then she opened her eyes, "Mr. President! What are you doing here?" Marie struggled to sit up and winced at the effort.

"Lie still." John ordered, "I came to see how my favourite babysitter is doing. You know, when we told you to take a year out, we didn't mean for you to get half killed in a battle."

"It was my own fault," Marie explained, "I got distracted and didn't see the ship that hit us. I would have got out of the way otherwise."

It took John a second before he understood,

"You were piloting the Titans?" He looked on Marie with admiration. "Wait until I tell David."

"How is he?"

"Missing you. He doesn't want to listen to my bedtime stories anymore."

Marie smiled, "Tell him that I miss him too."

"Why don't you come back with me to see him?" John suggested. "Delenn would love to see you as well, and you could recuperate for a couple of weeks before resuming your travels."

Marie smiled as she considered the idea, but shook her head, "Thank you; but we agreed that I would stay away from Minbar for a year. I have to be back on Mars in a couple of days anyway."

"Well, if you're sure?" John waited to see if she would change her mind. She didn't. "You take care of yourself," he continued, "Delenn would never forgive me if you got yourself killed. Send us a letter occasionally, and promise to let us know if you need any help."

Marie laughed, "I promise. But I have all the help I need at the moment." She smiled at Susan.

They talked for a little longer, Marie inquiring after her various friends and hearing the latest news from the Ranger camp. Soon a message came through, that the Excalibur was waiting for the President's return. Susan escorted him to his shuttle.

"Where are you going next?" John asked his former first officer.

"I'm going back to Mars for repairs." Susan replied, "I expect to be there for some time." She stopped walking and faced the President, "This has hurt Earth John. Not only did we lose ships we are unable to replace at the moment; far too many Earthforce personnel are trapped because of this quarantine. Half of my crew are down there. We are in a mess."

"You'll get through it." John tried to reassure her, "No one's in a major war at the moment, although you can never count on the Centauri."

That made Susan laugh.

"That's better." Said John as they resumed walking, "You were looking too serious, although this plague is no laughing matter."

"Do you know what it is yet?"

"The bioweapons division is still working on it, but indications are that it is beyond anything that we can cure without help."

"What are you going to do?"

"We're going to send the Excalibur out to search for a cure. You've been in contact with the First Ones Susan. Maybe they left something behind when they left that could help us."

"You're clutching at straws." Susan advised.

"I know," John admitted, "But we can't sit back and do nothing."

"Are the Rangers going to crew the Excalibur?"

"No. They will be investigating various leads, but I want an Earth crew on Excalibur. It is our planet that needs saving."

"You'll have a tough job finding a crew," Susan warned. "As I said, your choices have just become limited."

"I know." John paused, "Which is why I'm asking you to take command."

Susan stopped and looked at John.

"What?" she asked. The man in front of her grinned the way he always did when he sprung a surprise.

"I am offering you the command of the most advanced destroyer ever made." He looked at her expectantly.

"I'm flattered," Susan was flustered and tried to buy time, "But why me?"

"Oh come on Susan. You are the most obvious choice." John started to count the points off on his fingers, "You have tackled more unknown situations out there than most Earthforce captains; you will not give up once you have set your mind on something; you are one of the best officers that I have ever served with; I would trust you with my life. Shall I go on?"

"No." Susan was smiling again. "It is a very tempting offer, and under any other circumstances I would jump at the chance, but I will have to decline."

"What!" John stared at her in disbelief. He tried to find something to say, but could only come out with, "Why?"

Susan took a breath to gather her thoughts. "Everything you said about me is true, and it means a lot that you trust me, but at this moment in my life, I'm not sure if I could live up to it."

John started to speak, but Susan held up a hand to stop him.

"My life has been a complete mess for the past five years, and you know why." John nodded. "I have just begun to pull myself out of the fog I was in, and I have a long way to go. I don't think I am ready again just yet to take on that kind of responsibility. I also owe it to my ship and crew here to show them what kind of captain I can really be. It's the least they deserve. If I took command of the Excalibur it would look like I was running out on them."

John sighed, "Well, I'm not going to say that I'm disappointed," He paused, "Yes, I am disappointed. But, I do understand why Susan. I don't know where I'm going to find a captain as capable as you; I was counting on you saying yes."

"Sorry John." Susan playfully commiserated with him, "I need to stay here. You haven't forgotten that Vorlon ship sitting in one of my docking bays have you?"

"I had actually." He said, then after a pause, "Is that a new hairstyle you're wearing?"

OoOoO

The Excalibur left the next day for Babylon Five and the Titans returned to Mars for repairs. They were also to wait for new crew assignments. That was likely to take longer than the repairs, as no ship was unaffected by the Drakh attack. Among the crew Susan had lost, was her first officer. She wondered who Earthforce could get to volunteer to serve under the Ice Maiden. Many of her remaining crew were promoted, including Collins, whom Susan personally recommended after his actions during the battle.

The manpower shuffling Susan left to the Generals. She concentrated on getting her ship back into shape. The destroyers that had been stranded in Mars orbit were luckily unharmed so at least they wouldn't be completely defenceless whilst the Titans was out of commission. It was going to be a long job as they had taken quite a battering; a percentage of the outer hull required repair or replacement, and most of the ship's systems had components that had blown.

Their extended stay did have some advantages. It meant that Marie did not have to be moved from the ship's medbay before she had recovered sufficiently, and a call from Captain Ivanova insured that there were no problems about her taking the college test from her bed. Two weeks later, she received the good news that she had been offered a place on the course of her choice.

After they had finished celebrating, Susan escorted Marie to the docking bay. It was time to say goodbye.

"I don't know how to thank you for everything you've done." Marie said.

"I wouldn't have said I'd done that much." Susan answered.

"If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have got into college." "I hate bureaucrats; that's all." Susan grinned, "And it was fun."

"Thank you anyway. I'll try not to disappoint you."

"I don't think you will; just remember to have some fun whilst you're there."

There was a shout from the private shuttle in front of them. They looked up to see Michael Garibaldi waving at them from the hatch.

"Michael!" Susan shouted back, "I didn't know you were back from Babylon Five."

"Got in last night." Michael said as he came down the steps to meet them. "Sounds like you had some fun here while I was away."

"Sorry you missed it."

"Oh, I didn't miss it all." Michael grinned, "Are you all packed Marie?"

"Yes," Marie answered awkwardly, her shyness resurfacing. "Thank you for inviting me to stay with you Mr. Garibaldi."

"Hey, call me Michael. Mister I keep for business."

Marie nodded, but said nothing. Susan broke into the silence,

"It is kind of you to help. I was worried when my doctor said Marie shouldn't live on her own until she's completely well."

"No problem," Michael said, "It was Lise who suggested it. I think she gets lonely in that big house sometimes."

"Has John found a captain for the Excalibur yet?" Susan asked as Marie and Michael climbed into the shuttle.

"Some guy called Gideon." Michael replied, "A smartass of a captain. Reminds me of you."

"I'm flattered" Susan smiled. "You take care of Marie now."

"Will do."

"Bye Susan!" Marie called from her seat, "I'll keep in touch."

"You'd better." Susan called back.

"Hey Titans!" Michael activated the shuttle's communications, "Have I got clearance for this thing?"

Susan retreated to a safe distance and waved the shuttle off. She was still standing, lost in her thoughts when a lieutenant found her a few minutes later.

"Captain?" she nervously approached.

"Yes, what is it." Susan turned with a smile. Her crew were still apprehensive around her although hopefully that would change.

"Some of the new crew are about to dock."

"Good. They will have a couple of days to settle in before we break orbit. Any news on a first officer?"

"He's also on the shuttle"

"Excellent! I'll go meet him."

OoOoO

Susan studied her crew as the disembarked the shuttle. Some were little more than cadets but she was glad to have enough people to run the ship efficiently again.

The last of the crewmen passed her and she drew herself up into her most impressive pose, ready to meet her new second in command. She intended to be intimidating at first and only relax later when she found out what kind of officer she had been sent. She was also nervous and this was the best way to hide it.

She took a deep breath as someone stepped through the shuttle's hatch and started down the steps. As he halted and saluted, Susan's intimidating pose collapsed and a grin spread across her face.

"Commander Corwin reporting for duty." He announced.

"David!" Susan almost shouted in delight. "What are you doing here?"

"Because of the shortage of experienced officers at the moment," Corwin explained, "All former Earthforce personnel that are on Babylon Five were given the chance to rejoin with full rank and privileges. I haven't served on a ship for years so I thought I'd take them up on the offer."

"It is certainly good to see you again." Susan picked up one of David's bags and began to walk.

"Thank you Captain." He followed a step behind Susan.

"Call me Susan when you're off duty." She paused to let him catch up. "That's an order."

"Yes Captain..Susan."

Susan grinned again, "That's better. Now let me show you around."

To be continued...