Disclaimer: None of this belongs to me ya'll know the drill.
Author's note: Okay thanks to the many, many reviewers who actually reviewed this fic and yes Sticks, I did miss your hints. Also many, thanks to my excellent beta reader Deneveon.
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Chapter Eight
Jaina Solo walked over to Jag as they walked away from their stationary clawcrafts. To her surprise, as they fell into step with one another, Jag suddenly grabbed her hand and squeezed it lightly while they walked the short distance to where his father waited. After flicking a puzzled but smiling glance at her companion, Jaina allowed herself to relax. Jag rarely indulged in public displays of affection, and any time he did, even such small things as holding hands, Jaina reveled in them.
As they approached his father and his observing gaze fell on their joined hands, Jaina waited for a comment of some kind. She knew her father-her very Corellian father- would have something to say about it, even if it was Jacen holding the hand of a member of the opposite sex, and not Jaina-his only daughter. But on the other hand, she supposed all fathers were different. Baron Fel seemed more reserved than most though, especially for a man with Corellian heritage.
Several minutes later, as they approached the Fel estate in the speeder that had been waiting for them, Jaina took in all of her surroundings with a critical eye. Her mother was the former Chief of State of one of the most powerful republics in galactic history, after all, and as her daughter-and not to mention a friend of royalty like Tenel Ka-Jaina was not unused to the luxuries and excesses of upper class life. However, the Fel family home was another matter. The grounds, even the small section Jaina was able to see, were breathtaking. Csilia might be an icebound planet, but that didn't mean that it lacked anything in beauty or elegance.
No wonder, Jaina thought as they approached the house, that Jag had once thought of her as only a 'scruffy Rebel mechanic.' "Wow," Jaina murmured out loud to Jag appreciatively.
"You like it?" He asked hopefully.
"Of course," Jaina replied softly, though enthusiastically. "It's wonderful. I've seen a lot of places throughout the galaxy, but none quite like this."
A small smile flickered across Jag's face. "I'm glad you like it. I've wanted to show it to you for a long time. Sometime, I will show you the rest. This is just the beginning."
Jaina squeezed their still joined hands aware of Baron Fel's scrutiny, but ignoring it. "I would like that."
Finally they stopped in front of the Fel estate-well, mansion really-and got out of the speeder. With some trepidation, Jaina followed Jag and Baron Fel into the cavernous outer room.
"Syal," Soontir boomed, surprising Jaina at the jovial emotion he showed and the love for his wife that she felt rolling off of him through the Force. "I brought one of your children back with me, Love, and another guest."
Jag grinned at his father's exuberance as they ventured farther into the house. They had just stepped into the hall way that led into the various rooms of the manor when a gorgeous woman, who Jaina immediately recognized as Wynessa Starflare, aka Syal Antilles Fel, joined them. Her face shown with joy as her eyes slipped from her husband's familiar form to land on the visage of her oldest living child.
"Jagged!" She exclaimed in a delighted voice as she rushed forward to embrace her son.
"Mom," Jag said with an equally happy grin.
As they embraced tightly, Syal whispered in a hushed tone, "Thank you for coming home, Jagged."
As she stepped back from her son and fell into her husband's arms, she finally noticed her guest. Jaina was suddenly conscious of the fact that she was covered in bruises and lacerations, that her hair was a grimy tangled mess from flying and that her flight suit was decidedly wrinkled. All in all it was not how she had pictured-how she had wanted- to meet her boyfriend's mother, a woman renowned throughout the galaxy for her beauty.
"Hello, Dear," Syal said warmly extending a cordial hand to Jaina, "I'm Syal Fel."
Jaina forced herself to relax and allowed the manners her mother had drilled into her and her brothers throughout her childhood to take over. Jaina reached to accept the woman's offered hand and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Jaina Solo."
"Welcome to Csilia." Syal said politely, although Jaina could sense her surprise at her unexpected guest. Syal noted with a speculative eye how relaxed Jag seemed to be around Jaina. "Soontir," she said with a note of aggravation in her voice, "Why didn't you tell me Jagged was coming home?"
She saw Jaina's giggle out of the corner of her eye before the girl spoke. "Excuse me, Ma'am," she said with polite amusement, "but that's our fault."
As she gestured to Jag to include him in the party at fault, Syal noticed the quick tightening of Jag's eyes and the slight warning glance he sent in Jaina's direction and she wondered what had truly happened to her son and his companion.
"We had a navigational error," Jaina continued, "and fortunately we ended up here instead of somewhere less...welcoming."
"Well," said Syal sensing there was more to the story, but not willing to push for details, "I'm just glad you're home, Jagged. Come," she gestured to the rest of the house, "Jagged, your room is still as you left it, if you would like to clean up."
"That would be good, Mom, but uh." he stuttered gracelessly to a stop with a glance at Jaina.
Syal blinked and hid a smile at seeing her normally unflappable son flustered. She smiled at Jaina, deciding to talk to the girl about a few things later, before she added warmly, "Of course, Jaina, we would insist that you stay here with us." Despite the years she had spent in Imperial society and among the Chiss, Syal still preferred the emotional openness and chaos the rest of the galaxy embraced to the grim and efficient Chiss, and Jaina seemed to, despite her polished manner, be the epitome of a rogue and a rebel.
"Thank you, I would appreciate that," Jaina said politely, and Syal could see the genuine relief in here eyes. Maybe this girl wasn't as tough as she looked.
* * * * *
An hour later, Jag and Baron Fel were gone. They had been called away to present the Chiss High Council with the newest information on the Vong crisis, leaving Jaina and Syal alone at the Fel residence.
To Jaina's surprise, Syal was nothing like the glamorous actress that she had often portrayed in her younger years and, despite carrying the title of Imperial baroness, she was quite down to earth-a lot like her brother, in fact. So Jaina supposed she shouldn't have been surprised when she found Syal in the kitchen actually cooking the food that would be served later that night when Jag and Soontir returned. Of course, Jaina mused as she watched, it could have just been the fact that Syal was actually cooking: Force knew no one in her family had any mentionable talent in that particular area.
"So Jaina," Syal asked as the girl stood awkwardly behind her watching her, "How do you know Jag?"
Jaina, to Syal's surprise, blushed. She had only just met Jaina, but from what she had observed of her, from her rank and from what Jag and her husband had said about her, Syal knew that Jaina was not the type of girl to blush frequently, if ever. The answer to the question that she had initially asked just to make conversation was becoming more and more interesting.
"Jag," Jaina answered in a business like tone, "was greeting a bunch of diplomats-my mother and uncle included-at a diplomatic reception on Ithor." She paused as if carefully considering her next words. "I sensed Jag even before I saw him. He has a very unique Force presence. I was in the crowd and he jumped down to introduce himself to me." She smiled fondly at the memory, although, Syal noted her face was still carefully guarded. "We had been simming against Jag's squadron for the past few days and we had been holding our own, but we'd still been getting vaped consistently. The first thing he ever said to me was meant as a compliment, but actually came off as an insult. It made him sound like arrogant, annoying fighter pilot."
"What happened after that?" Syal inquired, not only interested in what had happened to Jag while he was away from Chiss space, but also intrigued by Jaina Solo. The girl was nothing like what she had expected.
Jaina shrugged slightly, "After Ithor, I didn't see Jag again until the fighting at Hapes."
Syal was puzzled by the dark, haunted look that lingered over Jaina's face as she continued softly, "I thought both of my brothers were dead and I was in a vengeful rage." She looked pointedly at Syal. "You know who my grandfather was."
Syal flinched slightly as she realized what Jaina was capable of, but refused to back down from the test that Jaina's words presented. "I do indeed. I once had the great misfortune to meet him. I have never been so scared before or since," she admitted candidly.
Jaina half nodded. "I'm sorry." She said genuinely.
Syal nodded in acknowledgement of her apology and then gestured for Jaina to continue as she turned back to her cooking.
"We fell back to Borealis." She shot a smile at Syal. "Your crazy brother was in charge of defending that system. He also gave me my own squadron, which Jag voluntarily joined." Jaina shrugged and attempted to act casual. "We went separate ways after Borealis and didn't see each other much until we started the journey that brought us here."
And that was an enigmatic statement that Syal knew contained more than what Jaina had said. Just like the rest of the girl's statements-true, but severely lacking in revealing details. However, there was one thing Syal had realized from her conversation with Jaina that she doubted the girl even knew.
"So," Syal asked matter-of-factly, "How long have you been in love with my son?"
* * * * *
Tenel Ka sat quietly in her quarters. She'd had a hand in the design in of this ship. Her main contribution had been the large view port that she was currently staring out of. Sometimes when she was in a pensive mood, she would sit and stare out of the aforementioned view port for hours-this being one of those occasions. She finally had what she had wanted since she was fourteen: the love of Jacen Solo. But now there were problems-not with her and Jacen, but with the circumstances surrounding them.
She had been very happy when she found out her mother was pregnant a few years ago. Not only because she was looking forward to having sibling, but also because that meant that she, Tenel Ka, would never be forced to take the Hapan throne. She sighed, and now, she thought dismally, she was the queen mother.
She knew that she, like her father before her would be required to marry to provide an heir to the throne, according to Hapan custom. However, she knew the dangerous lifestyle of Hapes' elite better than any other-and she had little desire to drag anyone, much less someone she loved, into such a perilous situation. She knew how hard it had been for her own mother, while she had been the ruler of the consortium. She sighed again, but was interrupted from her despairing thoughts by a light tap on the door to her quarters. Expecting Jacen, Tenel Ka turned away from the window and said, "Come in."
To her surprise it was Tahiri, and not Jacen, who entered. Tahiri, while still taking on her shift, had become more and more reclusive during the journey.
"Jacen says that he can sense us getting closer to Jaina, but that he can't sense any Vong around. He wanted me to let you know that we should be there soon."
"Thank you, Friend Tahiri." The blonde-haired young woman nodded and turned to leave, though Tenel Ka stopped her before she could. "Tahiri," she said, "may I ask you a question?"
"Of course."
Tenel Ka remained silent for a moment, knowing what she wanted to ask but unsure of how to say it. "You are aware of the political situation on Hapes, are you not, Friend Tahiri?"
Tahiri nodded, sensing that it would be easier for Tenel Ka to talk about whatever was bothering her if she remained silent.
"I care very much about Jacen, but I have no wish to bring him into that situation." She exhaled deeply as she struggled to contain her emotions. She continued softly, "That situation killed my mother." She shook her head. "If something happened to him because someone was trying to get to me, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself."
Tahiri stood there for a moment, unsure of how to react. She had been glad that Tenel Ka trusted her enough to confide in her, but she hadn't really expected a problem of this magnitude. Taking a breath, she started. "Tenel Ka, I understand your problem. Your heart is telling you to do one thing, while your head is telling you to do another. You need to trust your heart as well as Jacen. Talk to him," she said intensely. "He might not have grown up in the Hapan court, but he knows about the dangers of being associated with a powerful political leader."
Tenel Ka looked up at her oddly. "What?" Tahiri asked puzzled by the scrutiny.
"It's nothing, Friend Tahiri. Sometimes I just wonder at the disparity between age and wisdom." She smiled, thinking idly that it was her first smile of the day. "Thank you, Friend Tahiri. I will talk to Jacen."
* * * * *
Jacen Solo smiled contentedly as he leaned back in the pilot's seat. After their declaration of love, he and Tenel Ka hadn't retreated from one another as they had after their first true kisses. Instead they had grown steadily closer, rapidly becoming a solid couple. However, despite their recent closeness-or maybe because of it-he could sense something bothering Tenel Ka.
The smile dropped from his face as he considered that. He had wasted so, so much time he could have spent with Tenel Ka because of his lack of perception. He groaned and, despite the embarrassment he knew she would bring, Jacen wished his mother were here. She had insight into every situation and could easily tell him what was bothering Tenel Ka. He jerked in surprise when the object of his thoughts dropped in to the seat next to him looking equally preoccupied.
"Tenel Ka?" he asked, turning her name into a question as he reached out a hand to her. She immediately took it, and the gesture reassured him, giving him a warm, comforting feeling that he had only found with Tenel Ka.
"Jacen," she said quietly, "we need to talk."
"To talk?" he repeated dumbly suddenly gripped with an unexplained sense of fear.
"We need to talk about what's going to happen after we find Jaina and return to the Galactic Federation of Free Alliances."
"This isn't just a fling, Tenel Ka." Jacen said abruptly, afraid she thought this meant nothing to him, "I love you and I'm serious about this, about us."
She laughed lightly, although Jacen sensed it was really more from a need to release tension than from genuine amusement. "I know, dear Jacen," she said letting go of his hand to touch his face, "Although that is reassuring. I was referring to the fact that I'm the Queen Mother of Hapes."
Jacen flinched they hadn't talked about how the political situation they were entangled in would effect them. They had been too content with avoiding the unpleasant realities altogether.
"What are you saying, Tenel Ka?" he asked through gritted teeth, hoping that this wasn't the part where she told him it had been great but it just wouldn't work.
"I'm saying, Jacen, that I want nothing more than for the entire galaxy to know that I love you, but it's dangerous." She let out a strangled sound that Jacen wasn't sure if it was a derisive snort or a choked sob. "Look at my mother," she continued, "She was the Queen Mother but in the end, she was still killed. Nothing could protect her-I couldn't protect her."
Suddenly Jacen realized with a flash of insight why she was acting so strangely.
"I don't want to lose you like I lost my mother," she continued. "I couldn't stand being responsible for that too."
For the first and only time since she had lost her arm, Jacen saw Tenel Ka start crying. Without thinking he embraced her, soothing her and letting her cry for her mother. When her sobs began to quiet, he quit stroking her hair and leaned back just enough to look her in the eyes.
"Tenel Ka, what happened to you mother wasn't your fault. You had nothing to do with that. No one could have known that Ta'a Chume was that desperate, or that she would go after Teneniel Djo. Tenel Ka, I love you. I know that you're afraid that someone will try to hurt me to get at you, but I will not let them dictate how we spend our lives."
He paused and looked in to the depths of her eyes to emphasize his point. "Tenel Ka, if you tell me to leave, I will, but I want to spend my life with you. I don't care what the Hapan nobles say or do. I'm not invincible, but I am a Jedi Knight and I will do whatever it takes to stay with you if you'll let me."
He smiled pleadingly at her and her resolve broke. She knew she might be signing his death warrant or even her own with her next words, but she almost didn't care. She didn't want to think about life with some boring, obnoxious Hapan noble instead of this man before her now. Her heart melted and she smiled. "What you propose is dangerous, Jacen, very dangerous and it is not a game. But I don't want to give up on us simply because it's dangerous."
Jacen felt a huge wave of relief wash over him with her words. She hadn't rejected him. He broke into a breathtaking smile, which she matched happily. His next words, though he would never regret them, would stun him for years to come and leave Tenel Ka shaking her head in wonder.
"Tenel Ka," he said as he slipped down on to the deck between them so that he could look her in the eye, "I love you and I want to always be apart of you life. Will you marry me?"
Author's note: Okay thanks to the many, many reviewers who actually reviewed this fic and yes Sticks, I did miss your hints. Also many, thanks to my excellent beta reader Deneveon.
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Chapter Eight
Jaina Solo walked over to Jag as they walked away from their stationary clawcrafts. To her surprise, as they fell into step with one another, Jag suddenly grabbed her hand and squeezed it lightly while they walked the short distance to where his father waited. After flicking a puzzled but smiling glance at her companion, Jaina allowed herself to relax. Jag rarely indulged in public displays of affection, and any time he did, even such small things as holding hands, Jaina reveled in them.
As they approached his father and his observing gaze fell on their joined hands, Jaina waited for a comment of some kind. She knew her father-her very Corellian father- would have something to say about it, even if it was Jacen holding the hand of a member of the opposite sex, and not Jaina-his only daughter. But on the other hand, she supposed all fathers were different. Baron Fel seemed more reserved than most though, especially for a man with Corellian heritage.
Several minutes later, as they approached the Fel estate in the speeder that had been waiting for them, Jaina took in all of her surroundings with a critical eye. Her mother was the former Chief of State of one of the most powerful republics in galactic history, after all, and as her daughter-and not to mention a friend of royalty like Tenel Ka-Jaina was not unused to the luxuries and excesses of upper class life. However, the Fel family home was another matter. The grounds, even the small section Jaina was able to see, were breathtaking. Csilia might be an icebound planet, but that didn't mean that it lacked anything in beauty or elegance.
No wonder, Jaina thought as they approached the house, that Jag had once thought of her as only a 'scruffy Rebel mechanic.' "Wow," Jaina murmured out loud to Jag appreciatively.
"You like it?" He asked hopefully.
"Of course," Jaina replied softly, though enthusiastically. "It's wonderful. I've seen a lot of places throughout the galaxy, but none quite like this."
A small smile flickered across Jag's face. "I'm glad you like it. I've wanted to show it to you for a long time. Sometime, I will show you the rest. This is just the beginning."
Jaina squeezed their still joined hands aware of Baron Fel's scrutiny, but ignoring it. "I would like that."
Finally they stopped in front of the Fel estate-well, mansion really-and got out of the speeder. With some trepidation, Jaina followed Jag and Baron Fel into the cavernous outer room.
"Syal," Soontir boomed, surprising Jaina at the jovial emotion he showed and the love for his wife that she felt rolling off of him through the Force. "I brought one of your children back with me, Love, and another guest."
Jag grinned at his father's exuberance as they ventured farther into the house. They had just stepped into the hall way that led into the various rooms of the manor when a gorgeous woman, who Jaina immediately recognized as Wynessa Starflare, aka Syal Antilles Fel, joined them. Her face shown with joy as her eyes slipped from her husband's familiar form to land on the visage of her oldest living child.
"Jagged!" She exclaimed in a delighted voice as she rushed forward to embrace her son.
"Mom," Jag said with an equally happy grin.
As they embraced tightly, Syal whispered in a hushed tone, "Thank you for coming home, Jagged."
As she stepped back from her son and fell into her husband's arms, she finally noticed her guest. Jaina was suddenly conscious of the fact that she was covered in bruises and lacerations, that her hair was a grimy tangled mess from flying and that her flight suit was decidedly wrinkled. All in all it was not how she had pictured-how she had wanted- to meet her boyfriend's mother, a woman renowned throughout the galaxy for her beauty.
"Hello, Dear," Syal said warmly extending a cordial hand to Jaina, "I'm Syal Fel."
Jaina forced herself to relax and allowed the manners her mother had drilled into her and her brothers throughout her childhood to take over. Jaina reached to accept the woman's offered hand and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Jaina Solo."
"Welcome to Csilia." Syal said politely, although Jaina could sense her surprise at her unexpected guest. Syal noted with a speculative eye how relaxed Jag seemed to be around Jaina. "Soontir," she said with a note of aggravation in her voice, "Why didn't you tell me Jagged was coming home?"
She saw Jaina's giggle out of the corner of her eye before the girl spoke. "Excuse me, Ma'am," she said with polite amusement, "but that's our fault."
As she gestured to Jag to include him in the party at fault, Syal noticed the quick tightening of Jag's eyes and the slight warning glance he sent in Jaina's direction and she wondered what had truly happened to her son and his companion.
"We had a navigational error," Jaina continued, "and fortunately we ended up here instead of somewhere less...welcoming."
"Well," said Syal sensing there was more to the story, but not willing to push for details, "I'm just glad you're home, Jagged. Come," she gestured to the rest of the house, "Jagged, your room is still as you left it, if you would like to clean up."
"That would be good, Mom, but uh." he stuttered gracelessly to a stop with a glance at Jaina.
Syal blinked and hid a smile at seeing her normally unflappable son flustered. She smiled at Jaina, deciding to talk to the girl about a few things later, before she added warmly, "Of course, Jaina, we would insist that you stay here with us." Despite the years she had spent in Imperial society and among the Chiss, Syal still preferred the emotional openness and chaos the rest of the galaxy embraced to the grim and efficient Chiss, and Jaina seemed to, despite her polished manner, be the epitome of a rogue and a rebel.
"Thank you, I would appreciate that," Jaina said politely, and Syal could see the genuine relief in here eyes. Maybe this girl wasn't as tough as she looked.
* * * * *
An hour later, Jag and Baron Fel were gone. They had been called away to present the Chiss High Council with the newest information on the Vong crisis, leaving Jaina and Syal alone at the Fel residence.
To Jaina's surprise, Syal was nothing like the glamorous actress that she had often portrayed in her younger years and, despite carrying the title of Imperial baroness, she was quite down to earth-a lot like her brother, in fact. So Jaina supposed she shouldn't have been surprised when she found Syal in the kitchen actually cooking the food that would be served later that night when Jag and Soontir returned. Of course, Jaina mused as she watched, it could have just been the fact that Syal was actually cooking: Force knew no one in her family had any mentionable talent in that particular area.
"So Jaina," Syal asked as the girl stood awkwardly behind her watching her, "How do you know Jag?"
Jaina, to Syal's surprise, blushed. She had only just met Jaina, but from what she had observed of her, from her rank and from what Jag and her husband had said about her, Syal knew that Jaina was not the type of girl to blush frequently, if ever. The answer to the question that she had initially asked just to make conversation was becoming more and more interesting.
"Jag," Jaina answered in a business like tone, "was greeting a bunch of diplomats-my mother and uncle included-at a diplomatic reception on Ithor." She paused as if carefully considering her next words. "I sensed Jag even before I saw him. He has a very unique Force presence. I was in the crowd and he jumped down to introduce himself to me." She smiled fondly at the memory, although, Syal noted her face was still carefully guarded. "We had been simming against Jag's squadron for the past few days and we had been holding our own, but we'd still been getting vaped consistently. The first thing he ever said to me was meant as a compliment, but actually came off as an insult. It made him sound like arrogant, annoying fighter pilot."
"What happened after that?" Syal inquired, not only interested in what had happened to Jag while he was away from Chiss space, but also intrigued by Jaina Solo. The girl was nothing like what she had expected.
Jaina shrugged slightly, "After Ithor, I didn't see Jag again until the fighting at Hapes."
Syal was puzzled by the dark, haunted look that lingered over Jaina's face as she continued softly, "I thought both of my brothers were dead and I was in a vengeful rage." She looked pointedly at Syal. "You know who my grandfather was."
Syal flinched slightly as she realized what Jaina was capable of, but refused to back down from the test that Jaina's words presented. "I do indeed. I once had the great misfortune to meet him. I have never been so scared before or since," she admitted candidly.
Jaina half nodded. "I'm sorry." She said genuinely.
Syal nodded in acknowledgement of her apology and then gestured for Jaina to continue as she turned back to her cooking.
"We fell back to Borealis." She shot a smile at Syal. "Your crazy brother was in charge of defending that system. He also gave me my own squadron, which Jag voluntarily joined." Jaina shrugged and attempted to act casual. "We went separate ways after Borealis and didn't see each other much until we started the journey that brought us here."
And that was an enigmatic statement that Syal knew contained more than what Jaina had said. Just like the rest of the girl's statements-true, but severely lacking in revealing details. However, there was one thing Syal had realized from her conversation with Jaina that she doubted the girl even knew.
"So," Syal asked matter-of-factly, "How long have you been in love with my son?"
* * * * *
Tenel Ka sat quietly in her quarters. She'd had a hand in the design in of this ship. Her main contribution had been the large view port that she was currently staring out of. Sometimes when she was in a pensive mood, she would sit and stare out of the aforementioned view port for hours-this being one of those occasions. She finally had what she had wanted since she was fourteen: the love of Jacen Solo. But now there were problems-not with her and Jacen, but with the circumstances surrounding them.
She had been very happy when she found out her mother was pregnant a few years ago. Not only because she was looking forward to having sibling, but also because that meant that she, Tenel Ka, would never be forced to take the Hapan throne. She sighed, and now, she thought dismally, she was the queen mother.
She knew that she, like her father before her would be required to marry to provide an heir to the throne, according to Hapan custom. However, she knew the dangerous lifestyle of Hapes' elite better than any other-and she had little desire to drag anyone, much less someone she loved, into such a perilous situation. She knew how hard it had been for her own mother, while she had been the ruler of the consortium. She sighed again, but was interrupted from her despairing thoughts by a light tap on the door to her quarters. Expecting Jacen, Tenel Ka turned away from the window and said, "Come in."
To her surprise it was Tahiri, and not Jacen, who entered. Tahiri, while still taking on her shift, had become more and more reclusive during the journey.
"Jacen says that he can sense us getting closer to Jaina, but that he can't sense any Vong around. He wanted me to let you know that we should be there soon."
"Thank you, Friend Tahiri." The blonde-haired young woman nodded and turned to leave, though Tenel Ka stopped her before she could. "Tahiri," she said, "may I ask you a question?"
"Of course."
Tenel Ka remained silent for a moment, knowing what she wanted to ask but unsure of how to say it. "You are aware of the political situation on Hapes, are you not, Friend Tahiri?"
Tahiri nodded, sensing that it would be easier for Tenel Ka to talk about whatever was bothering her if she remained silent.
"I care very much about Jacen, but I have no wish to bring him into that situation." She exhaled deeply as she struggled to contain her emotions. She continued softly, "That situation killed my mother." She shook her head. "If something happened to him because someone was trying to get to me, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself."
Tahiri stood there for a moment, unsure of how to react. She had been glad that Tenel Ka trusted her enough to confide in her, but she hadn't really expected a problem of this magnitude. Taking a breath, she started. "Tenel Ka, I understand your problem. Your heart is telling you to do one thing, while your head is telling you to do another. You need to trust your heart as well as Jacen. Talk to him," she said intensely. "He might not have grown up in the Hapan court, but he knows about the dangers of being associated with a powerful political leader."
Tenel Ka looked up at her oddly. "What?" Tahiri asked puzzled by the scrutiny.
"It's nothing, Friend Tahiri. Sometimes I just wonder at the disparity between age and wisdom." She smiled, thinking idly that it was her first smile of the day. "Thank you, Friend Tahiri. I will talk to Jacen."
* * * * *
Jacen Solo smiled contentedly as he leaned back in the pilot's seat. After their declaration of love, he and Tenel Ka hadn't retreated from one another as they had after their first true kisses. Instead they had grown steadily closer, rapidly becoming a solid couple. However, despite their recent closeness-or maybe because of it-he could sense something bothering Tenel Ka.
The smile dropped from his face as he considered that. He had wasted so, so much time he could have spent with Tenel Ka because of his lack of perception. He groaned and, despite the embarrassment he knew she would bring, Jacen wished his mother were here. She had insight into every situation and could easily tell him what was bothering Tenel Ka. He jerked in surprise when the object of his thoughts dropped in to the seat next to him looking equally preoccupied.
"Tenel Ka?" he asked, turning her name into a question as he reached out a hand to her. She immediately took it, and the gesture reassured him, giving him a warm, comforting feeling that he had only found with Tenel Ka.
"Jacen," she said quietly, "we need to talk."
"To talk?" he repeated dumbly suddenly gripped with an unexplained sense of fear.
"We need to talk about what's going to happen after we find Jaina and return to the Galactic Federation of Free Alliances."
"This isn't just a fling, Tenel Ka." Jacen said abruptly, afraid she thought this meant nothing to him, "I love you and I'm serious about this, about us."
She laughed lightly, although Jacen sensed it was really more from a need to release tension than from genuine amusement. "I know, dear Jacen," she said letting go of his hand to touch his face, "Although that is reassuring. I was referring to the fact that I'm the Queen Mother of Hapes."
Jacen flinched they hadn't talked about how the political situation they were entangled in would effect them. They had been too content with avoiding the unpleasant realities altogether.
"What are you saying, Tenel Ka?" he asked through gritted teeth, hoping that this wasn't the part where she told him it had been great but it just wouldn't work.
"I'm saying, Jacen, that I want nothing more than for the entire galaxy to know that I love you, but it's dangerous." She let out a strangled sound that Jacen wasn't sure if it was a derisive snort or a choked sob. "Look at my mother," she continued, "She was the Queen Mother but in the end, she was still killed. Nothing could protect her-I couldn't protect her."
Suddenly Jacen realized with a flash of insight why she was acting so strangely.
"I don't want to lose you like I lost my mother," she continued. "I couldn't stand being responsible for that too."
For the first and only time since she had lost her arm, Jacen saw Tenel Ka start crying. Without thinking he embraced her, soothing her and letting her cry for her mother. When her sobs began to quiet, he quit stroking her hair and leaned back just enough to look her in the eyes.
"Tenel Ka, what happened to you mother wasn't your fault. You had nothing to do with that. No one could have known that Ta'a Chume was that desperate, or that she would go after Teneniel Djo. Tenel Ka, I love you. I know that you're afraid that someone will try to hurt me to get at you, but I will not let them dictate how we spend our lives."
He paused and looked in to the depths of her eyes to emphasize his point. "Tenel Ka, if you tell me to leave, I will, but I want to spend my life with you. I don't care what the Hapan nobles say or do. I'm not invincible, but I am a Jedi Knight and I will do whatever it takes to stay with you if you'll let me."
He smiled pleadingly at her and her resolve broke. She knew she might be signing his death warrant or even her own with her next words, but she almost didn't care. She didn't want to think about life with some boring, obnoxious Hapan noble instead of this man before her now. Her heart melted and she smiled. "What you propose is dangerous, Jacen, very dangerous and it is not a game. But I don't want to give up on us simply because it's dangerous."
Jacen felt a huge wave of relief wash over him with her words. She hadn't rejected him. He broke into a breathtaking smile, which she matched happily. His next words, though he would never regret them, would stun him for years to come and leave Tenel Ka shaking her head in wonder.
"Tenel Ka," he said as he slipped down on to the deck between them so that he could look her in the eye, "I love you and I want to always be apart of you life. Will you marry me?"