A.N. Here is the myth that I was talking about when I mention Usagi's name:
http://www.yamasa.org/acjs/english/link_september.html it's the best
version I could find so far... read it, isn't it sad? The rabbit does
remind you of Usagi though, doesn't it? ^_^ It does to me at least. lol In
searching for a site to refer people who are curious about the folktale
about the rabbit of the moon, I came across an interesting site:
http://www.theblackmoon.com/Contents/content.html It sells stuff from
Japan, & it's called "Black Moon"... creepy ne? lol it's a cool site
though. And the other question that I got was who is the real father of
Usagi's baby... it's Katsuo, the guy that she went on a date with in the
1st chapter. I guess if you don't remember the earlier chapters you would
forget his name. It's easy for me 'cuz I'm the one writing it. lol
Disclaimer: I don't Own SM, Naoko Takeuchi-sensei does!!
Chapter 8
Mamoru walked back to his apartment, swearing all the way & holding his right hand in his left. He quickly unlocked the door, letting it slam behind him as he headed straight for the bathroom & the first aid kit. Usagi quietly walked to the bathroom doorway listening him mumbling something about 'that damn wall.'
"Mamoru?" She asked as she peeked around into the room. "What happened to your hand?"
"I punched a wall." He groaned & continued cleaning out the cuts caused by hitting the rough wall instead that heartless bitch he used to date. He never could hit a woman.
"You punched a wall?!" Usagi gasped.
"Yeah, and I think I broke some bones in my hand." Mamoru grumbled. He was NOT in a good mood. "See, I can't move my fingers." Usagi watched as his fingers merely twitched, he couldn't move them freely.
"Why did you do that?" She blinked.
"Maaya-chan made me mad. I couldn't hit her so I decided to take my anger out on the brick wall... not one of my brightest ideas."
"Eh? She seemed so nice & polite."
"She's a bitch. A crazy, manipulative, bitch. Pure & simple."
"What did she do?"
"Nothing. She was just saying stuff that was making me mad so I left."
"There's got to be more to it than that." Usagi said. "You're doing that 'thing' with your face again."
"She kissed me." Mamoru told her, but he wasn't amused. "Trying to get me to do what she wanted, just like in high school."
"You knew her in high school?"
"Yeah. We dated for a while. It was mainly a popularity thing. We were both very popular but we were total opposites. I was actually the nerd that came from nothing who acted like nothing bothered him, but really was screwed up. She was the queen of the school, acting sweet & innocent in front of teachers & parents & like I said, a bitch in reality." Mamoru said. "I was the one who did all her homework so that she could even graduate. The only reason I didn't get labelled a geek was because all the girls thought I was hot." He sighed as he wrapped up his hand in some gauze.
"I suppose you've had lots of girlfriends, then. I used to see you with a new girl every week." Usagi said.
"Nope. She was my only girlfriend. Ever."
"Then what about-"
"Usako!" Mamoru cut her off. "Don't. I don't want to talk about it." Mamoru's dark blue eyes stared into Usagi's & scared her a little. "I'm not like that anymore."
"So-Sorry." She stuttered nervously as she backed away from the doorway.
"Usako." Mamoru's eyes softened. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little tense right now. I'm going to head down to the hospital & get my hand checked out... do you want to come with me? I promise that I won't get angry about anything."
"I- I..." She hesitated.
"I like your company... and I'll probably have to wait there for a few hours, so I'd like to be able to talk to you while I wait."
"I guess so." Usagi smiled.
*~*~*At The Hospital*~*~*
"Thanks for coming with me, Usako." Mamoru turned to her as they sat in the waiting room.
"No problem. Why do you call me 'Usako'?"
"It just suits you. Would you rather that I didn't call you that? Do you want me to call you Usagi?"
"No. Usako is nice... it's cute." Usagi smiled.
"I thought so."
"I'll call you Mamo-chan, then." She winked.
"Mamo-chan?" He blinked.
"Yep!" They both laughed quietly. "Hey, Mamo-chan? What are you going to do about university? You can't write if your hand is broken."
"I'll just use my left hand & type everything on my laptop." Mamoru told her. "Not to worry."
"I still can't believe that you punched a wall. She must've said something really bad, huh?"
"Yeah..." Mamoru hoped that she wouldn't ask what Maaya had said.
"What did she say?"
"Chiba Mamoru?" A nurse called out to everyone in the waiting room.
"That's me." Mamoru replied, rather eagerly.
"You can go in now." The nurse smiled.
"Thank you." He smiled back politely. "I'll be back soon, Usako."
"Okay." Usagi smiled, aware that he still hadn't answered her question.
*~*~*Back at the Apartment*~*~*
"Mamo-chan." Usagi said suddenly after it had been quiet for a while. "How did Maaya-san make you so mad?"
"She-! No, it's nothing you need to worry about." Mamoru stopped himself from telling her.
"Tell me. It's about me isn't it?"
"She called you a whore." Mamoru said it quickly, hoping that it would hurt less, like a band-aid being ripped off.
"That's just another name to add to a long list." Usagi said sadly, fighting with all of her strength to keep from crying. When she was little... it always hurt less to pull the band-aid off slowly, she hated it when her mom would rip it off.
"Usako, I-" Mamoru rushed to comfort the girl who was near tears in front of him.
"Just tell me one thing Mamoru. Alright?" Usagi looked up at him. "Do you think less of me? Do you think that I'm a whore for letting what happened, happen?"
"No. Of course not." Mamoru put his arms around her & hugged Usagi. He gently kissed her forehead & she started to cry. "It wasn't your fault."
"But..." Usagi whispered as she lifted up her head to look at Mamoru. She couldn't talk. He was kissing her.
*~*~*A Week Later*~*~*
Needless to say, it had been an awkward, & quiet week for Mamoru & Usagi. He had driven her to doctor's appointment & things like that but she always refused his help when he offered it to her. To Usagi, Mamoru had crossed the line, to where she could no longer trust him. But she had nowhere else to go, she had stopped talking to her friends about a month before & she couldn't go back home. She continued living with Mamoru, keeping a close watch on his every move & making sure he didn't get to close to her.
When she had been crying that night, the last thing she expected was for Mamoru to kiss her. It wasn't aggressive, but it also wasn't welcome. Usagi quickly pushed him away; Mamoru had looked about as surprised as she had herself. Still... it didn't matter to Usagi... what he did was not something that she could easily forgive him for.
Mamoru was at a complete loss of what to do or say. He didn't know why he had kissed Usagi, it had just happened. She was upset & he wanted to comfort her... but he had always had trouble with women. They had always been so phoney with him; girls had 'pretended' to be upset about something around him, just to get his attention. He had reacted without thinking & now he was paying for it.
"Damn it!" Mamoru slammed his fist down on the table in frustration as they ate dinner one night, causing Usagi to gasp. "Are we going to talk about this or not?"
"I would rather NOT talk to you right now." Usagi glared up at him.
"Why?"
"What do you mean, 'Why?' You know why!" She said angrily. "Just what were you trying to do?"
"I wasn't trying anything! I don't know what I was thinking! It just happened!"
"What a sorry excuse!!! You are REALLY unbelievable, did you know that?" All of Usagi's emotions were bubbling up to the surface now. She was getting angrier & angrier by the second.
Mamoru hadn't seen her this difficult to talk to since that first week when he & Motoki had gone to visit her & she had shouted at Motoki not to touch her. That was because she was afraid... she was afraid again now, & Mamoru couldn't blame her. "I know, but it's the truth! Believe me Usako, the last thing I wanted to do was to upset you more!"
"Well great idea, Einstein! That was the perfect way to make me feel better! Kiss me & remind me of everything that happened when I was raped! By someone, who by the way, has the same reputation as you did when you were in high school!" Usagi took a deep breath to try to contain herself. "Is it not already bad enough that I have to relive it every single night when I go to sleep, or when I go out somewhere & people stare at me & make little offhand comments to each other? You, the person that I thought I could trust the most out of everyone, made me feel ten times worse with your little kiss."
"Usako..." Mamoru hated the vibe that he was getting from her. Usagi was angry, there wasn't any question about that, and he had known it all week. What was really bothering him was her last sentence... he made her feel ten times worse than everything else did. "I..."
"What?" She said impatiently.
"I'm sorry." Mamoru said quietly. "If you want me to, I'll leave."
"Leave?" Usagi asked.
"Yes. I'll let you keep living here & I'll help pay the bills, but I'll be gone. I'll move somewhere else & leave you alone."
"Well..." Usagi said slowly. Wasn't this exactly what she wanted? She wouldn't have to worry about Mamoru trying anything on her this way. She could have privacy. She could live on her own in peace & solitude for a few months longer... then she could focus all her time on her baby. But was that what she really wanted? If he was gone... even though he made her feel uncomfortable sometimes... & had a pretty bad reputation when it came to women... she wouldn't feel as safe anymore.
"Don't worry about it... I'll go pack up some stuff & crash at Motoki's for the night." Mamoru got up to leave & go pack.
"Wait!"
Mamoru stopped in his tracks & turned around to Usagi, dumbfounded. "Eh?"
"This is YOUR apartment. You can't leave." Usagi said. "I-"
"Don't you dare say that you'll move out instead, we've already discussed that."
"That's not it... I- I'd feel better if you stayed."
"You would?"
"Call me crazy, but I would." Usagi smiled lightly. "I'm not though, right? I'm not crazy for wanting to stay with you? You're not going to do anything to make me regret this decision... are you?"
"No. I promise." Mamoru smiled. He turned around again & began to walk into the living room.
"Mamo-chan..."
Mamoru smiled at his nickname... it was a sign that she wasn't mad anymore. "What is it?"
"Do you respect me?"
"Haven't you asked me this before?"
"This is different. I need to know this answer. I need to know if I've made the right decision for sure."
"There's not a woman I respect more than you in this entire world."
"Really?" Usagi gasped quietly. She was expecting his usual 'Of course I do!' response.
"Usako. You are beautiful, & funny, & you treat everyone around you equally. You don't judge anybody & you see the silver lining on every cloud."
"Eh?"
"You see good in every bad situation or person."
"Isn't that to be considered my weakness?"
"I don't think so. I think it makes you stronger, stronger than you'll probably ever know."
Usagi blushed a little. Why did he always try to make her feel so good about herself? She didn't ever know how to react, & she only wondered why he felt that it was necessary.
"You, Usako. Are the strongest, kindest, & most selfless person I've ever known. Knowing you has changed my life. I'm glad that you want to still be a part of it."
"Mamo-chan..." Usagi whispered, not knowing what else to say.
"There. Now I've said it. You are my angel. You've changed my life."
"You've saved mine." Usagi said quietly. "I never got to tell you... but that day that you called me, when you had your nightmare & insisted on coming over to check on me... I was probably about 30 seconds away from taking a kitchen knife & slashing my wrists. You called & I realized that you really cared. If you were gone then who would I have to save me?" A few sparkling tears rolled down her cheeks. "It seems to me, that you're my angel too."
"Usako, if I hugged you... would you be scared off?" Mamoru asked quietly as he walked towards her.
"No." Usagi replied. Mamoru's arms wrapped around her securely in a warm hug.
He could smell the scent of her shampoo as Mamoru's head rested on hers. It was intoxicating. Everything about Usagi seemed to draw him in, as a matter of fact. Mamoru only thought to himself, 'Why?' Why did she have this power over him? Why did he crave being near her all the time? Why did he feel so strangely about her? It was a feeling that he had never really felt before. It made him uncomfortable. He wondered, 'Could it be... that I'm falling in love with Usako? Impossible!' There were so many reasons why he shouldn't: they were roommates, she was sixteen, she was PREGNANT, & above all, she didn't feel the same way for him. Never the less... he had fallen, & landed hard for his cheery little roommate, & everything that went with her.
Finally... he had found the girl who he really connected with...
'Finally...' Usagi thought to herself. 'I've found someone who'll always be there...'
*~*~*~*~*~*
He-yo minna! Did you know that as of right now, chapter 3 & chapter 7 are tied as my most reviewed chapters with 10 reviews each? Yup! Wha'dya say we break that record, Hm? Lets reach the goal of 11 reviews!!! (I know, I know... I'm shameless ^_~) How'd u like this chapter, anyway? I hope it was good. It took me a while to finish. Review & I'll post the next chapter soon!
Ja ne!
Disclaimer: I don't Own SM, Naoko Takeuchi-sensei does!!
Chapter 8
Mamoru walked back to his apartment, swearing all the way & holding his right hand in his left. He quickly unlocked the door, letting it slam behind him as he headed straight for the bathroom & the first aid kit. Usagi quietly walked to the bathroom doorway listening him mumbling something about 'that damn wall.'
"Mamoru?" She asked as she peeked around into the room. "What happened to your hand?"
"I punched a wall." He groaned & continued cleaning out the cuts caused by hitting the rough wall instead that heartless bitch he used to date. He never could hit a woman.
"You punched a wall?!" Usagi gasped.
"Yeah, and I think I broke some bones in my hand." Mamoru grumbled. He was NOT in a good mood. "See, I can't move my fingers." Usagi watched as his fingers merely twitched, he couldn't move them freely.
"Why did you do that?" She blinked.
"Maaya-chan made me mad. I couldn't hit her so I decided to take my anger out on the brick wall... not one of my brightest ideas."
"Eh? She seemed so nice & polite."
"She's a bitch. A crazy, manipulative, bitch. Pure & simple."
"What did she do?"
"Nothing. She was just saying stuff that was making me mad so I left."
"There's got to be more to it than that." Usagi said. "You're doing that 'thing' with your face again."
"She kissed me." Mamoru told her, but he wasn't amused. "Trying to get me to do what she wanted, just like in high school."
"You knew her in high school?"
"Yeah. We dated for a while. It was mainly a popularity thing. We were both very popular but we were total opposites. I was actually the nerd that came from nothing who acted like nothing bothered him, but really was screwed up. She was the queen of the school, acting sweet & innocent in front of teachers & parents & like I said, a bitch in reality." Mamoru said. "I was the one who did all her homework so that she could even graduate. The only reason I didn't get labelled a geek was because all the girls thought I was hot." He sighed as he wrapped up his hand in some gauze.
"I suppose you've had lots of girlfriends, then. I used to see you with a new girl every week." Usagi said.
"Nope. She was my only girlfriend. Ever."
"Then what about-"
"Usako!" Mamoru cut her off. "Don't. I don't want to talk about it." Mamoru's dark blue eyes stared into Usagi's & scared her a little. "I'm not like that anymore."
"So-Sorry." She stuttered nervously as she backed away from the doorway.
"Usako." Mamoru's eyes softened. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little tense right now. I'm going to head down to the hospital & get my hand checked out... do you want to come with me? I promise that I won't get angry about anything."
"I- I..." She hesitated.
"I like your company... and I'll probably have to wait there for a few hours, so I'd like to be able to talk to you while I wait."
"I guess so." Usagi smiled.
*~*~*At The Hospital*~*~*
"Thanks for coming with me, Usako." Mamoru turned to her as they sat in the waiting room.
"No problem. Why do you call me 'Usako'?"
"It just suits you. Would you rather that I didn't call you that? Do you want me to call you Usagi?"
"No. Usako is nice... it's cute." Usagi smiled.
"I thought so."
"I'll call you Mamo-chan, then." She winked.
"Mamo-chan?" He blinked.
"Yep!" They both laughed quietly. "Hey, Mamo-chan? What are you going to do about university? You can't write if your hand is broken."
"I'll just use my left hand & type everything on my laptop." Mamoru told her. "Not to worry."
"I still can't believe that you punched a wall. She must've said something really bad, huh?"
"Yeah..." Mamoru hoped that she wouldn't ask what Maaya had said.
"What did she say?"
"Chiba Mamoru?" A nurse called out to everyone in the waiting room.
"That's me." Mamoru replied, rather eagerly.
"You can go in now." The nurse smiled.
"Thank you." He smiled back politely. "I'll be back soon, Usako."
"Okay." Usagi smiled, aware that he still hadn't answered her question.
*~*~*Back at the Apartment*~*~*
"Mamo-chan." Usagi said suddenly after it had been quiet for a while. "How did Maaya-san make you so mad?"
"She-! No, it's nothing you need to worry about." Mamoru stopped himself from telling her.
"Tell me. It's about me isn't it?"
"She called you a whore." Mamoru said it quickly, hoping that it would hurt less, like a band-aid being ripped off.
"That's just another name to add to a long list." Usagi said sadly, fighting with all of her strength to keep from crying. When she was little... it always hurt less to pull the band-aid off slowly, she hated it when her mom would rip it off.
"Usako, I-" Mamoru rushed to comfort the girl who was near tears in front of him.
"Just tell me one thing Mamoru. Alright?" Usagi looked up at him. "Do you think less of me? Do you think that I'm a whore for letting what happened, happen?"
"No. Of course not." Mamoru put his arms around her & hugged Usagi. He gently kissed her forehead & she started to cry. "It wasn't your fault."
"But..." Usagi whispered as she lifted up her head to look at Mamoru. She couldn't talk. He was kissing her.
*~*~*A Week Later*~*~*
Needless to say, it had been an awkward, & quiet week for Mamoru & Usagi. He had driven her to doctor's appointment & things like that but she always refused his help when he offered it to her. To Usagi, Mamoru had crossed the line, to where she could no longer trust him. But she had nowhere else to go, she had stopped talking to her friends about a month before & she couldn't go back home. She continued living with Mamoru, keeping a close watch on his every move & making sure he didn't get to close to her.
When she had been crying that night, the last thing she expected was for Mamoru to kiss her. It wasn't aggressive, but it also wasn't welcome. Usagi quickly pushed him away; Mamoru had looked about as surprised as she had herself. Still... it didn't matter to Usagi... what he did was not something that she could easily forgive him for.
Mamoru was at a complete loss of what to do or say. He didn't know why he had kissed Usagi, it had just happened. She was upset & he wanted to comfort her... but he had always had trouble with women. They had always been so phoney with him; girls had 'pretended' to be upset about something around him, just to get his attention. He had reacted without thinking & now he was paying for it.
"Damn it!" Mamoru slammed his fist down on the table in frustration as they ate dinner one night, causing Usagi to gasp. "Are we going to talk about this or not?"
"I would rather NOT talk to you right now." Usagi glared up at him.
"Why?"
"What do you mean, 'Why?' You know why!" She said angrily. "Just what were you trying to do?"
"I wasn't trying anything! I don't know what I was thinking! It just happened!"
"What a sorry excuse!!! You are REALLY unbelievable, did you know that?" All of Usagi's emotions were bubbling up to the surface now. She was getting angrier & angrier by the second.
Mamoru hadn't seen her this difficult to talk to since that first week when he & Motoki had gone to visit her & she had shouted at Motoki not to touch her. That was because she was afraid... she was afraid again now, & Mamoru couldn't blame her. "I know, but it's the truth! Believe me Usako, the last thing I wanted to do was to upset you more!"
"Well great idea, Einstein! That was the perfect way to make me feel better! Kiss me & remind me of everything that happened when I was raped! By someone, who by the way, has the same reputation as you did when you were in high school!" Usagi took a deep breath to try to contain herself. "Is it not already bad enough that I have to relive it every single night when I go to sleep, or when I go out somewhere & people stare at me & make little offhand comments to each other? You, the person that I thought I could trust the most out of everyone, made me feel ten times worse with your little kiss."
"Usako..." Mamoru hated the vibe that he was getting from her. Usagi was angry, there wasn't any question about that, and he had known it all week. What was really bothering him was her last sentence... he made her feel ten times worse than everything else did. "I..."
"What?" She said impatiently.
"I'm sorry." Mamoru said quietly. "If you want me to, I'll leave."
"Leave?" Usagi asked.
"Yes. I'll let you keep living here & I'll help pay the bills, but I'll be gone. I'll move somewhere else & leave you alone."
"Well..." Usagi said slowly. Wasn't this exactly what she wanted? She wouldn't have to worry about Mamoru trying anything on her this way. She could have privacy. She could live on her own in peace & solitude for a few months longer... then she could focus all her time on her baby. But was that what she really wanted? If he was gone... even though he made her feel uncomfortable sometimes... & had a pretty bad reputation when it came to women... she wouldn't feel as safe anymore.
"Don't worry about it... I'll go pack up some stuff & crash at Motoki's for the night." Mamoru got up to leave & go pack.
"Wait!"
Mamoru stopped in his tracks & turned around to Usagi, dumbfounded. "Eh?"
"This is YOUR apartment. You can't leave." Usagi said. "I-"
"Don't you dare say that you'll move out instead, we've already discussed that."
"That's not it... I- I'd feel better if you stayed."
"You would?"
"Call me crazy, but I would." Usagi smiled lightly. "I'm not though, right? I'm not crazy for wanting to stay with you? You're not going to do anything to make me regret this decision... are you?"
"No. I promise." Mamoru smiled. He turned around again & began to walk into the living room.
"Mamo-chan..."
Mamoru smiled at his nickname... it was a sign that she wasn't mad anymore. "What is it?"
"Do you respect me?"
"Haven't you asked me this before?"
"This is different. I need to know this answer. I need to know if I've made the right decision for sure."
"There's not a woman I respect more than you in this entire world."
"Really?" Usagi gasped quietly. She was expecting his usual 'Of course I do!' response.
"Usako. You are beautiful, & funny, & you treat everyone around you equally. You don't judge anybody & you see the silver lining on every cloud."
"Eh?"
"You see good in every bad situation or person."
"Isn't that to be considered my weakness?"
"I don't think so. I think it makes you stronger, stronger than you'll probably ever know."
Usagi blushed a little. Why did he always try to make her feel so good about herself? She didn't ever know how to react, & she only wondered why he felt that it was necessary.
"You, Usako. Are the strongest, kindest, & most selfless person I've ever known. Knowing you has changed my life. I'm glad that you want to still be a part of it."
"Mamo-chan..." Usagi whispered, not knowing what else to say.
"There. Now I've said it. You are my angel. You've changed my life."
"You've saved mine." Usagi said quietly. "I never got to tell you... but that day that you called me, when you had your nightmare & insisted on coming over to check on me... I was probably about 30 seconds away from taking a kitchen knife & slashing my wrists. You called & I realized that you really cared. If you were gone then who would I have to save me?" A few sparkling tears rolled down her cheeks. "It seems to me, that you're my angel too."
"Usako, if I hugged you... would you be scared off?" Mamoru asked quietly as he walked towards her.
"No." Usagi replied. Mamoru's arms wrapped around her securely in a warm hug.
He could smell the scent of her shampoo as Mamoru's head rested on hers. It was intoxicating. Everything about Usagi seemed to draw him in, as a matter of fact. Mamoru only thought to himself, 'Why?' Why did she have this power over him? Why did he crave being near her all the time? Why did he feel so strangely about her? It was a feeling that he had never really felt before. It made him uncomfortable. He wondered, 'Could it be... that I'm falling in love with Usako? Impossible!' There were so many reasons why he shouldn't: they were roommates, she was sixteen, she was PREGNANT, & above all, she didn't feel the same way for him. Never the less... he had fallen, & landed hard for his cheery little roommate, & everything that went with her.
Finally... he had found the girl who he really connected with...
'Finally...' Usagi thought to herself. 'I've found someone who'll always be there...'
*~*~*~*~*~*
He-yo minna! Did you know that as of right now, chapter 3 & chapter 7 are tied as my most reviewed chapters with 10 reviews each? Yup! Wha'dya say we break that record, Hm? Lets reach the goal of 11 reviews!!! (I know, I know... I'm shameless ^_~) How'd u like this chapter, anyway? I hope it was good. It took me a while to finish. Review & I'll post the next chapter soon!
Ja ne!