* * * Jason was the one that got me out of the hospital. He was the reason I survived there. In the hospital I felt safe. But on the outside, every face was a stranger.

I could not go home because things were still iffy with grams and she would not accept Jason in 'her home'.

I had nowhere to go and so Jason stepped in, offering yet another helping hand.

"I'm not sure about this, Jason." I said the moment he showed me the guest room.

"Is something wrong with the room? You can stay in the master bedroom if you like. I can crash on the couch or in here. Whatever you want."

"No, it's fine. There is nothing wrong with the room. I'm just afraid that if I stay here than I'm going to keep you from your life."

"I don't have a life, or much of one. You will not interfere at all." He answered.

Just then a pounding came on his door. I flinched for just a moment and his eyes settled on me. "I thought you didn't have a life?" I questioned, jokingly, letting him know I was okay.

He ran down the stairs and opened the door. I heard a commotion and could not help myself from coming down the stairs. I had to make sure everything was okay. As I turned the corner I stopped short when I noticed the blond at the bottom of the stairs.

"I've tried calling you, I left messages, I've come by here, and I even went to Sonny. He had no clue where you were. So, what's going on? Where have you been? Please tell me you didn't go visit that prissy virgin."

"Carly, you know I wouldn't do that. She made her decision about our relationship the second she chose to tell A.J. about Michael."

"He misses you Jase, you know that? He asks about you and what should I tell him? You're the only father he's known and all the sudden he's thrown into a home with the Quatermaine's. They're like sharks feeding on . . . you know all the other little fish. And Edward keeps going on about Michael and I just can't . . ."

"Carly, enough!" He interrupted.

"What is with you Jason? You ignore me and my phone calls and your interrupting me when I'm talking about Michael's future?"

"Carly, you decided his future the second you told A.J. that you would be his bride. He's with his real father and his family, isn't that enough?"

"Jason, you know I don't love A.J., don't you?"

"Yes."

"What's wrong? You're acting weird, almost defensive."

"I just can't talk right now. I'll call you later."

"Don't tell me that, Jase. I know you better. Is this about me picking A.J.? You know I would always pick you over him, don't you?"

"Carly, as much as you'd like to believe it, the whole world does not revolve around you."

"I don't think that, Jason. My top priority is Michael and his needs. He needs you in his life."

"He needs me, Carly, or you need me?

"Him and me both need you."

"Carly, go to A.J. He is Michael's father and he needs him. You're going to marry him. If this keeps happening then it's just going to confuse Michael."

She walked out and slammed the door. Jason blinked and then turned to go back up the stairs. He noticed me at the top of the stairs waiting.

"So you heard that?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry." I apologized.

"It's fine."

"So what happened to you not having a life?" I asked, jokingly.

"I still don't. I use to but things change."

"Who's she?"

"Long story."

"I've got the time." I offered

He smiled, "Does that mean you'll be staying?"

I gave the penthouse the once-over and let my eyes settle on him, "Sure."

***

A week or so after I moved in, I was already tired of hanging out inside the penthouse.

"Eventually I need to join the rest of the world." I said, suggesting the outing.

He rented a car and took me all around Port Charles, introducing me to the town. But he specifically avoided the area around the park.

Instead of the park, he took me out of town a ways towards a bridge that nobody used. Everything was so quiet, peaceful, and beautiful. I could not stand it. It reminded me of the park and every snapping twig made me jump so we left.

I never asked him about his job or his personal life. I assumed that he would let me know if he wanted me to. But one day, I found out for myself.

Jason had decided to take me to Elm Street Pier. We had been going there for a few days, it was one place that never frightened me and not a lot of people were there.

We were about to sit down on the bench when a bullet came flying out of nowhere. At the time, I had no idea what it was. I only saw something wiz past my face and then it was gone. We both ducked, in unison, Jason covering me with his body. It was as close as I had been to a man since HIM. But it did not bother me.

"Are you hurt?" He asked, impatiently.

He backed away when he noticed how close he was to me.

"No. Was that . . ."

"We have to get inside." He said, frantically looking around.

His eyes went cold, but never towards me.

Before I knew it, he had hold of my hand. In the other he had acquired a gun. He looked around searching for the shooter but came up empty-handed.

"Jason?" I asked, confused by everything.

"Please come with me. Just trust me and I'll explain everything."

"You are the only one I trust." I say as he drags me into the backseat of a limo I had not heard him call.

"Penthouse, Johnny. Now." He said as he shut the door.

When we got there we took the elevator up to the penthouse level. For the first time I notice the door on the other side of the floor.

"Who lives . . ." I start to ask as we get inside.

He shuts the door and looks me over to make sure that I'm alright.

"You need to know something." He says, seriously.

"What?" I ask, concerned.

"What I do is dangerous. When you are with me you are in danger."

"I don't understand what you want me to say."

"The last thing that I want is to make you a target. You have been through so much . . ." He says, rubbing his brow in frustration.

"Jason," I say, putting my hand on his arm, "You are the reason I survived. If you are asking me to walk away . . . I can't. I won't. You are the only person I can trust. You're the only one besides the police and my grams that knows . . ."

"I don't want you hurt because of me." He said, frustrated.

"If it did, it wouldn't be your fault. I'd never blame you." I say, my hand still on his arm.

"I'd blame myself." He said, pushing my hand away.

I caught a look in his eyes right before he turned away. A look as if he was carrying the whole world on his shoulders.

I could not understand why he was pushing me away. He was the one person that I thought that I could depend on. He was the one that was there through all the hurt and all the pain. But I guess all I was to him was a charity project.

I back away towards the door.

"I see. All I am to you is a pity project. You felt bad and wanted to help but as soon as I got in the way of you living your life you don't want to pretend to care anymore."

"Elizabeth, that's not true. You know that's not the truth." He says, trying to gently grab my arm and get me to stay. I flinch away.

"I don't know anything anymore. I'm just some naïve girl who got raped and took the hand of the first stranger who offered help, thinking he didn't have an agenda. But I guess my instincts were wrong. Everyone has an agenda."

I stormed out.

I didn't want to leave but my emotions got the better of me. Everyone I've known, that I've depended on, has walked out on me. I guess it was just a matter of time before Jason did the same. But for some reason, I thought he was different. I guess I was wrong.

* * * I went to live with my grams, an interesting experience within itself. Sarah was there but I just stayed in my room with the door locked. I felt safe. But every time I went to sleep I kept the lights on for fear that some stranger would grab me from the shadows.

Audrey had not told Sarah about the rape. She assumed that if I wanted her to know then I would let her know. I was glad that she didn't know because I didn't want her to look at me the way gram does now.

I tried to call my brother many times. I would imagine him flying down here and taking care of me, making all my hurt go away. But I couldn't manage to do it. Every time I tried, my heart sank low in my chest and I just gave up.

After being cooped up in the house I decided to venture outside. I walked to Kelly's which is less than a block away but it seemed to take forever because of the many times I had to look over my shoulder to see if I was being followed.

When I got inside I was caught off guard by Lucky.

"Hey." He said, simply.

"Hello." I said, trying to stay calm.

"I'm sorry about blowing you off that one night."

The words caught in my throat. I was frozen in place and suddenly the diner felt like it was closing in on me.

"Liz?" He called me back.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot, I need to get back home."

"Oh, um, okay. I was just wondering if you'd like to try to go out again."

I almost died right there.

"I'm . . . um . . . I've . . ." I started but was interrupted by Bobbie Spencer.

"Lucky, have you seen Maggie yet? She was supposed to start working fifteen minutes ago."

He turned to answer and I just turned and ran. I ran all the way back to my grams without stopping. On the front porch I stopped and let out a few heaving breathes before opening the door and locking it securely.

I tried not to think about Jason but I couldn't help it when I found his shirt in my suitcase. He had lent it to me one night and I guess it was mistakenly packed up with my clothing. I tried not to let the fact of his absence bother me, but it did.

He had yet to contact me and two days had passed. Maybe I was right.

I had to go to the hospital to go to the therapist that my grandmother was forcing me to see. The first time I had gone he had been waiting outside but this time I found the seat vacant.

When I found the seat vacant I realized just how much I missed him. I realized how much he had been there for me. It made me sick to think about going through the rest of my journey alone.

I went to the Elm Street Pier to clear my head. There were no gunshots this time. I sat on the ledge staring into the water. It looked so appealing. I imagined diving in and just letting myself sink down to the bottom. But I turned away afraid that if I looked any longer I would actually do it.

**Flashback**

"The water is freezing, I'm not getting in."

"Come on, Liz. You'll warm up quickly." He said, pulling his shirt over his head.

I stuck my feet in again but pulled them out once they had been in the icy cold water for a moment.

"No. It must be below fifty degrees. I'm not getting in."

"You're just chicken." He said, removing his shorts.

Clad in only his blue boxers, he dived into the water. He came up a moment later, his red hair soaked and his lips slowly turning purple.

"Jake, you're crazy." I said, staring at those lips. Purple, but so attractive nonetheless.

He swam over. Before I knew it he had pulled me in, still clad in all my clothing, the water like ice sickles poking my skin.

"You idiot." I screamed, trying to swim away. My long hair kept getting in the way of my vision as I tried to get away.

He caught up quickly and pulled me close.

"Liz, you have to learn to live a little. Do something daring and unexpected."

"Like the stuff you do all the time?" I asked, sarcastically.

In that moment, his brown eyes focused on me in a way they never had before. He pulled me closer, our lips just a millimeter apart. And then in a moment of pure lust and passion, he pulled me close and kissed me.

**End of Flashback**

I do not flinch at the memory. That was before my rape when I trusted men to behave and control themselves. That was before I lost all hope and my innocence. And now, here I am alone, so eager for the touch of another. But at the same time, my skin crawls at the idea.

I turn to leave and there he is, Jason. His blue eyes instantly finding mine and for a moment all the uneasiness I felt seemed to melt away.

I get up and try to walk by and pretend like it is nothing. He moves in my way.

"Can we talk?" He asks, motioning towards the bench.

"Okay." I say, following him.

We sit down, only inches separating us. His crystal blue eyes stare into mine.

"I'm sorry about the other day. The last thing I wanted was for you to leave angry."

"I didn't mean what I said, at least not all of it." I say, getting lost for a moment in his eyes.

"I know. I can only imagine what you are going through. But I could not lie to you; my job is dangerous. People get hurt and I do not want you to be a causality."

"I know. I guess I just needed to test you. Everyone else in my life has walked away. I guess I needed to know that I could lean on you and you wouldn't do the same. I thought the only reason you were with me was because you pitied me."

"Never, Elizabeth. I admire you. You are so strong, stronger than you think." He said, taking my hand.

At that moment I found his eyes again. The heartbeats in my chest thumping so fast and loud that I thought he might hear. I longed for his touch. Not a friendly touch like when he held my hand. I wanted to feel how I felt with Jake so many years ago. I wanted to feel coveted, loved. And he was the only one I trusted enough to take that step with.

"Jason, could I ask you a favor?"

"Sure."

"Before I ask, if you don't want to, it's okay. No pressure."

"Okay."

"It's just that, I have felt so unwanted recently. After that night, it has been difficult to . . . get close to anyone. And with you, I don't feel that between us. With you I feel comfortable and safe."

I could not tell him. It was too embarrassing. Well, not so much embarrassing as . . . weird.

"What do you need?" He asked, worried after the pause and silence in mid- thought.

"Would you. . . hold me?"

"Hold you?" He asked, his lips curving slightly for a brief second.

"Just to see if I can do it."

"Sure." He said, his eyes lit with anticipation but his expression remained the same.

And soon enough I find his arms around me, like a soft blanket from your childhood that always makes you feel safe and warm.

"That's not what I was going to say. It's just so . . . embarrassing."

"You never have to be embarrassed to ask me something." He said, his voice soothing.

But I couldn't ask him, not yet.

"Never mind. This is good. It's perfect."

And for a moment it was perfect. But just like everything else in my life, it had to get ruined.

"Aww . . . isn't this cute?" A man's voice said, interrupting our moment.

I turned to look at him and remembered him from before my rape. I had seen him in Kelly's the day I set the date with Lucky. I grimaced slightly at the memory.

I remembered him there with the woman whom had come to visit Jason. I easily deduced who it was.

Jason left the embrace and stood up to face the man.

"I didn't mean to interrupt. Don't mind me. Please, continue." The man said, mockingly.

"What do you want?"

"I want you to stay away from my fiancée and I want you to stay away from Michael. I am his father and he belongs with me. He's already lost a year living with you."

"A.J., you've made your point, for the hundredth time. So now you can go home to your son and your fiancée."

"I just repeat it so I know you understand, little brother. Your not as quick as you use to be."

I looked at Jason and could see that A.J. was making him angry. I could tell that if I wasn't there then Jason might have hit him.

I stood up and walked over to Jason, putting a gentle hand on his arm.

"Let's go." I said, simply.

A.J. laughed and looked at Jason, "So, you've already replaced Robin."

Then A.J. turned to me, "By the end of this relationship, if you have any information for me, I live in the big mansion on Main Street."

Like I didn't know exactly what he was talking about. I was about to say something but Jason started to reply.

"You stay away from her and go back to your family, your son, and your fiancée."

"Why? Are you afraid she might let some information slip?" A.J. inquired.

"If you're so insistent on spending time with your son, why aren't you there with him now? Jason hasn't been to see Michael in days!" I said, speaking up for him.

A.J. look shocked for a moment and then let me have it; "You know nothing about me or my relationship with my son. Just because you're Jason's screwing partner . . ."

I completely shut down the second he said the words. My body froze and I no longer heard him. The next thing I know, Jason had pushed A.J. against the railing of the stairs and was holding him there by the collar of his jacket.

"Little bro, you know you'd be the first suspect if anything happened to me." A.J. started, "And Michael wouldn't have any father at all." He continued, hitting Jason where it hurt, his love for Michael.

I rushed over and put a hand on his arm, "You don't have to do this, Jason. I'm okay."

Momentarily his eyes met mine and then he let his grip on A.J. loosen, "Get out of my face."

A.J. took off but not without painting a big smirk on his face.

After Jason watched to make sure he left, he turned to look at me.

"I'm sorry about him." He stated, knowing that some of his words had hit a little too close.

"I'm sorry you're related to him." I said, jokingly, trying to lighten the mood.

I saw a slight change as he wrapped on arm around my side and we started walking, "It's not by choice." He stated, and waited for my smile.

He didn't have to wait long.