The next day, at my grandmother's house, I was alone when a knock came at
the door. I carelessly ran down, assuming it was Emily, Nikolas, Lucky, or
all three, coming to pick me up. My heart skipped a beat at the thought
that it might be Jason. But when I answered the door I forgot all about
them.
"Detective Taggart, come in." I said, moving out of his way.
"Thank you." He said, stepping inside. "Is your grandmother home?"
"No, she's at work. Is there something you need her for? I could call."
"No, I came to see you." He said, gently.
I sat down on the couch and he remained standing.
"It is about your case." He said.
I almost jumped out of my seat.
"Due to lack of evidence and many dead ends, the case has been officially closed."
I stopped breathing the second I heard his words. I could feel my body collapsing into itself as my heart raced.
"Elizabeth . . . ?"
I let out the air stuck within my lungs.
"I'm sorry. Usually if a case is open this long and we don't have any leads . . ."
"Can't I look at mug shots or something? This cannot just be the final word."
"You can look at the mug shots anytime you want. But you've looked at them before."
"So I'm just supposed to accept this? Oh, I got raped but since there was no evidence then he can just go free!"
"I'm so sorry, Elizabeth."
"Sorry is not enough."
"It's all I can offer." He stated.
The tears starting come down and they stung my eyes severely. If Taggart hadn't been there I might have just collapsed onto the floor and cried. But I tried to be strong so he wouldn't know, but I got the feeling he could see right through me.
"Please, just go."
"Do you need me to call someone? I could call Audrey." He offered.
"No."
The moment he left I picked up the phone. I dialed his number out of memory and waited.
Ring. Ring.
"Morgan."
"Jas-"
"Elizabeth. What's happened? What's wrong?" He asked, hastily.
"Please, just come and get me."
"I'm on my way."
Click.
He was there within ten minutes.
He took me in his strong arms and just held me. He didn't ask because he knew I would tell him when the time was right. But now, I just needed those arms. Pressed against his chest I could hear his heartbeat.
I dried my eyes and looked at him, "Taggart came by. They closed the case. Lack of evidence or leads or some shit like that." I stated, disgusted.
"That doesn't mean that everyone has stopped looking." He stated.
I looked up at him and for the first time realized what he had been doing.
"All the times you went out you were looking?"
He nodded.
I could not believe what I just heard. He had been out searching for the man who did this to me. He cared enough to take care of me and look for the man who did this. No one had ever cared about me this much. No one had ever even come close.
"Please, take me home." I asked.
And he did.
* * *
My sister Sarah said nothing when I moved out. My grandmother was very livid with her view but I left anyway.
It felt just like before when I lived with Jason, but so much better. He wasn't there as a friend to lean on, he was more than that. We weren't technically an item, but we had an understanding amongst eachother that we were more than friends.
Sonny forgave me for my *moment of insanity* and soon the three of us had dinner often. I became comfortable with him around and knew that Jason was right, that he could be trusted.
One night when Jason was away, I went across the hall and he welcomed me in with a smile.
"Are you worried about Jason?" He asked.
"Yes, I'm always worried. But so far he's always come back."
"And he will tonight." He said, holding up a glass to offer me a drink.
"No thank you." I said, having stayed away from it since my wild days before Port Charles.
I sat down on his couch and he joined me.
"If you know that, then why are you here?" He asked, concerned.
"Do you know where Jason is going? What he's doing?"
"No, he hasn't told me. Why?"
"He's trying to find someone for me."
"Who?"
"Someone who hurt me. I'm just afraid that if he does find him that he'll do something that he'll regret."
"Sweetheart, what do you mean?"
"Before I came to live with Jason, I was attacked."
"Attacked?"
"Raped." I said, silencing him for a while.
"I'm sorry." He said, backing away from me as if it might make me uncomfortable.
"You don't have to do that, I'm not going to break." I offered.
He stepped closer but still remained at a distance.
"But Jason is out looking for him. He's so invested in finding him that I'm afraid that if he does then . . ."
"You'll have to say goodbye to Jason for a while?" Sonny stated, completing my thought.
"Have you told him this?" He asked.
"No." I stated, feeling ashamed.
"Tell him, sweetheart. He'll listen." He said, knowingly.
* * * I didn't see Jason the rest of the night. I went upstairs to go to sleep when the phone began to ring.
Jason rarely called when he was out. He had done it more frequently when I had just begun to stay with him, but now he hardly called. I was surprised and rushed down the stairs. But it wasn't Jason.
"Hello?"
"Liz?"
I had to remind myself to breathe, "Steve?"
"Yeah."
"I cannot believe that it's you. God, it's been . . ."
"Too long. I heard from Sarah all the sordid details. So, what's the truth? Are you really staying with a mob hit man?"
I did not know how to respond. It was my brother, and I never lied to my brother. But Jason's job was his business, not mine to discuss.
"You know Sarah . . ." I started, changing the subject, but feeling horrible knowing that I was keeping anything from my brother.
"Yeah. I'm in New York at the moment and I was thinking that I might visit my favorite little sister when I stop in Port Charles tomorrow. I actually have some free time and might stay for awhile."
"STEVE!"
"I need an address to meet you."
I really wanted Steven and Jason to meet. But I wasn't sure how either would react to eachother. But they both are so much a part of my life that I want them to know of eachother.
"Could you meet me in the lobby of Harborview Towers?"
"Is that where you're . . . Sarah was being honest?"
"I'll see you there at noon." I said, avoiding the subject, and quickly hung up the phone.
* * * The next morning passed as it usually did. But before noon, around the time I normally started lunch or we would head out to eat out, I excused myself from the room and exited the penthouse. I took the elevator down to the lobby and waited eagerly. It had been years and I was eager to see my older brother.
At the same time I felt guilty for keeping a secret from Jason. I was afraid how he would react. But I quickly forgot this when I saw my older brother arrive.
He stepped in through the doors, characteristically early. I smiled, a feeling surging through my body that although so much had happened, I could still depend on the little things to remain the same.
He started looking around and he let his eyes pass over me once before letting them rest on me.
"Elizabeth?" He questioned.
I walked over, "Who else?"
He hugged me and then gave me the once over.
"Wow! Last time I saw you, you were my baby sister. Now, you're a woman."
I blushed and he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I guided him towards the elevator and as the doors opened I was not at all shocked to see Jason waiting.
I realized that he would notice me missing and frantically go searching, but I didn't realize it would happen as soon as it did. He barely stepped out of the elevator and just let our eyes meet. For a moment, I thought I almost saw jealously.
Steven noticed the look as well, "This must be the boyfriend."
He offered out his hand to shake but Jason remained stolid and I blushed dark red.
"He's just a friend." I explained as he finally put out his hand.
Steven looked as though he stumbled upon a secret that I was not yet privy to, and smiled. He and I stepped into the elevator and joined Jason.
"So . . . what do you do for a living?" Steve asked immediately.
I hit him playfully in the side but he did not withdrawal the question.
"Coffee." Jason answered.
"Coffee?" Steve asked, confused.
"He has a coffee warehouse." I informed him.
"Oh. Your business must be really lucrative to live in a place like this."
Jason said nothing and I could not get his eyes to meet mine.
When the elevator stopped at the penthouse floor, we all stepped out.
"How 'bout we go out to lunch?" I offered, to break the tense silence.
"Sure." Steve agreed.
"You two catch up." Jason offered and then went inside.
I told Steve to wait and followed Jason inside.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I know you don't like surprises. I just really wanted you two to meet eachother. He called yesterday while you were out and I was afraid that if I said something you would act like this."
He turned, "Don't apologize. He's your brother; you have the right to invite him over. Go, spend some time with him."
"But I wanted you two to get to know eachother. You're both such huge parts of my life that I hoped . . ." She paused.
I could tell that Jason did not want to let me down. He wanted to come along but something was holding him back. I didn't want to push him so I dropped the subject.
"I'll be back soon." I offered.
"Take your time."
I smiled and hesitantly shut the door.
"Ready?" Steve asked, looking concerned.
I smiled and let him lead me to the elevator. We rode down in silence, just the feeling of having him there made me feel as if every burden was lifted from my shoulders.
Of all places, he wanted to eat at Kelly's.
He noticed the difference the second we walked in.
"What's wrong?" He asked as I sat down at the corner table.
I wanted to tell him because I felt as if he deserved to know because I use to tell him everything. He use to be my confidant. But recently, Jason had been that person for me . . . and so much more. But I felt as if I told Steve then I would be betraying Jason in some way.
I knew that if Jason was there he would tell me that I was being silly. Except he wouldn't say it outright, he would just tell me to do what I wanted and not be concerned with what everyone else thought. But I was still hesitant.
Emily, whom was coerced by Bobbie to fill in for one of her absent waitresses, came over with a mixture of curiosity and surprise on her face.
"Liz . . . Hey!" She greeted me, and then turned towards Steve.
"Are you going to introduce us?" He asked after a minute of awkward silence.
"Oh . . . yeah . . . Emily this is my brother Steve, Steve this is . . ." I paused, unsure if I should introduce her as my friend or as Jason's sister.
Emily looked at me as if I had forgotten her name.
"Emily Quatermaine." I finished, simply, so I didn't have to make a decision.
They shook hands but Emily could tell that it wasn't the best time. She took our orders and avoided the small talk that Steve attempted to start.
"So, how'd you meet her? You a regular here?" He asked, nonchalantly.
"Mutual friend." I said, simply, not wanting him to bring up Jason.
But, as if he sensed it, he did.
"So, tell me all the sordid details of your love life." He inquired.
"I haven't got one." I answered.
"You haven't had one date since you got here months ago?" He asked, curious.
I couldn't lie to my brother. I had to tell him everything. And it had all started when I set up that date with Lucky Spencer.
"A few days after I moved here I had a date with a guy. It wasn't anything serious, but it never happened."
"What do you mean? Did he not show? Did you ditch him? Why so tight- lipped?" He asked.
"He showed only to tell me he couldn't stay. A friend of his had been ditched by their significant other and he wanted to comfort them. He was sorry, and I could see that, and we agreed we'd try it again."
"Doesn't sound all that bad of a guy, why didn't you two hook up?"
"The friend that had been ditched was Sarah."
"Oh . . ." He said, understandingly, knowing how it had always been between Sarah and me.
Emily interrupted us briefly to deliver our food and was off just as quickly as she had come. I made a mental note to explain and apologize later.
"What's with her?" Steve remarked, "She reminds me of Jason."
His comment seemed ironic to me and I cracked a slight smile. He looked at me confused as to how it was funny.
I explained, "Jason is her brother."
He thought for a moment, "Ahh . . . the mutual friend, I should have guessed."
"So, you met Jason before Emily?" He asked, trying to slyly lead into a conversation about my relationship with Jason.
"Something like that . . ." I offered, feeling the pressure of telling him what had happened creeping up on me.
He caught on, "What's wrong? Any mention of Jason and your love life and you are tight-lipped. You've never acted this way with me before, what's going on? Has he tried anything . . ." He started, and I knew exactly what he meant.
"NO! It's not like that." I started, "He . . . he saved me."
I closed my lips tight, knowing that I had begun the process of telling him. I knew how he would react.
**Flashback**
Elizabeth casually held the phone between her cheek and shoulder blade as she painted her nails on her left hand. In the midst of conversation she looked across the room at the mirror and scowled at her hair. She wondered what she could do with it and cursed herself for getting it cut short.
"So, do you know what you're going to wear yet?" Her friend Jill asked on the other end of the line.
"I was thinking my dark red shirt and that skirt I just got, the black one?"
"You are so lucky! Court is SO cute! I cannot believe he invited you to Brad's party!"
Elizabeth looked at the clock, "I have to go. I'll call you tonight when I get back."
She got dressed, managed to do something decent with her hair, and quickly corrected the two nails she had smudged in the process.
That same night, while at the party, she had not even second-guessed taking a drink from Court. When Court, the most popular guy in school offered you anything, you took it.
He carelessly had his arm around her shoulder and it was the most exhilarating and exciting experience of her teenage years. She smiled at him and he looked at her adoringly. He leaned in between sips and kissed her quickly. She couldn't help but smile.
She thought nothing of it when Court handed her another drink and another drink. But she began to feel the affects yet did not want to say anything and ruin her date.
She remembers him taking her hand and guiding her out of the main room and towards the bedroom. She remembers running into the door, giggling, and spilling her drink. He laughs with her and tells her to ignore the mess. He guides her towards the bed.
She falls back on it and he sits down beside her. He leans down next to her and looks at her adoringly.
Luckily for her, her friend Jill saw her go out of the room. Jill went to Steve, her date, and told him that she was worried about Elizabeth. Steve went into full protective-older-brother-mode and got there in time to save Elizabeth from something she would have regretted.
She remembers Steve pulling her out of the room and Court looking at her upset. It was obvious to Steve that Court was the type of guy who pulled that type of trick often and could tell by the smirk on his face that Elizabeth had been the only one to get away 'without any harm done'.
When Elizabeth was clear headed the next morning, Steve did not tell her the truth. He created a lie but it was to protect Elizabeth from the truth of what had almost taken place.
But months later he told her, having had the lie eat away at his insides. It was the hardest thing that he ever had to do. And when it was over, Elizabeth loved her brother more than she ever thought possible.
**End of Flashback**
I considered telling a lie of my own, concealing the truth so he might not attempt to rectify the situation in some way. But I hate liars and I never want to become one, especially to my own brother. My loving older brother that had lied to me once, and only once, and had apologized profusely afterwards.
"What happened, Liz?" He asked, and I could hear the pain in his voice.
I knew that he was angry for being kept out of the loop. But I knew, more than anything, that he was feeling guilty for leaving. I didn't want to make him feel worse and let him know that there was yet another man that had tried to take advantage and he was not there to be my savior.
"Do you remember what happened with Court Neylson?" I asked, timidly.
I knew that he had never forgotten. And in his eyes, at the mention of Court's name, I could see the same eyes I saw the day he told me what had truly happened that night. The eyes of a boy that had been sheltered most of his life that had finally had the blinders lifted.
"On Valentine's Day, when my date with Lucky got 'postponed', I ran to the park upset and ran into some trouble . . ." I said, my eyes shying away from his.
" . . . a man grabbed me from the bushes . . ." I started, not noticing that my eyes were wet.
"Lizzie!" He said, upset to learn the truth, and pushed his chair closer and surrounded me in those arms I was so use to.
"It's not your fault." I whispered, to stop him from blaming himself, which I knew he was doing.
"If I had been here . . ." He started.
I pushed out of his embrace, "I would have been grateful to have to here, but I'm not sure that would have been the best thing. I needed to lean on someone who didn't know me. I wouldn't want you to see me like that . . . again . . ."
A vile moan escaped his lips at the injustice of it all.
"I owe Jason an apology." He said, remembering from earlier that I had called him my 'savior' and now he knew why.
* * *
Jason was there when I got home. The minute I stepped into the penthouse, Jason could tell that something was amiss.
"What's wrong?" Jason asked, instantly.
"Nothing." I said, not in the mood to share after my encounter with my brother.
"Where's your brother?" He asked, curious.
"Back at his hotel. He needed some time after what I told him. . . He wanted you to know that he was sorry about before."
"You told him what happened?" He asked, surprised.
"Everything. He feels guilty that he wasn't there."
Jason was starting to see that Steve was not as bad as he had originally thought. No matter his opinion of the other man in Elizabeth's life, he knew that Steve cared about her and that was all that mattered.
He crossed the room and wrapped his arms around me.
I said nothing and just let him hold me. It made me happy to know that such a bad situation had given me something that I would never have otherwise, my relationship with Jason.
"You've been thinking about HIM. Haven't you?" He offered to end the silence.
He knows me too well.
"It's just that . . . I feel like I failed myself that night. If I remembered more than I might have been able to help the police catch him."
"Elizabeth, you tried to block it out. Why bring this up again if all it does is make you upset?"
"I just . . . If I had done something that night he would be off the street and he's still there. He could be hurting someone else and they might not have someone in their life to take care of them like I did."
He softly pushed a stray strand of my hair behind my ear and let his hand wonder on my cheek a little too long.
"I failed you that night." He offered, taking me back by surprised.
I flinched at his touch and he backed away, "Jason, you saved me!"
"If I had gotten there a little earlier . . ." He started, and I could see that he meant it. He felt responsible.
"Jason, we had barely met months before. Accidentally running into someone doesn't make you responsible for them. It's my fault I was there and no one else's."
"That was not your fault." He said immediately.
"If I had gone anywhere else . . ." I started, he interrupted, "Then we might not know eachother."
I looked up in his eyes and realized what I had gained and knew he was right. I had to stop over-analyzing the situation. IF questions lead nowhere and don't solve anything. I had to learn to move on.
He was silent for a moment, "If this is bothering you this much, there is something that might help you remember."
"What?" I asked, eager for answers.
"After my accident, they tried hypnotism to see if it could trigger any memories. The doctor said that in most cases where amnesia was involved, hypnotism is not the most effective. But it might be the right thing for you, if you really want to remember."
"I'd rather just forget, but I can't. I can't until I know that he is off the streets and cannot hurt anyone else. Before I wanted him caught out of vengeance, but now I just want justice."
"Do you want me to schedule the appointment?" He asked.
"Yes."
"Detective Taggart, come in." I said, moving out of his way.
"Thank you." He said, stepping inside. "Is your grandmother home?"
"No, she's at work. Is there something you need her for? I could call."
"No, I came to see you." He said, gently.
I sat down on the couch and he remained standing.
"It is about your case." He said.
I almost jumped out of my seat.
"Due to lack of evidence and many dead ends, the case has been officially closed."
I stopped breathing the second I heard his words. I could feel my body collapsing into itself as my heart raced.
"Elizabeth . . . ?"
I let out the air stuck within my lungs.
"I'm sorry. Usually if a case is open this long and we don't have any leads . . ."
"Can't I look at mug shots or something? This cannot just be the final word."
"You can look at the mug shots anytime you want. But you've looked at them before."
"So I'm just supposed to accept this? Oh, I got raped but since there was no evidence then he can just go free!"
"I'm so sorry, Elizabeth."
"Sorry is not enough."
"It's all I can offer." He stated.
The tears starting come down and they stung my eyes severely. If Taggart hadn't been there I might have just collapsed onto the floor and cried. But I tried to be strong so he wouldn't know, but I got the feeling he could see right through me.
"Please, just go."
"Do you need me to call someone? I could call Audrey." He offered.
"No."
The moment he left I picked up the phone. I dialed his number out of memory and waited.
Ring. Ring.
"Morgan."
"Jas-"
"Elizabeth. What's happened? What's wrong?" He asked, hastily.
"Please, just come and get me."
"I'm on my way."
Click.
He was there within ten minutes.
He took me in his strong arms and just held me. He didn't ask because he knew I would tell him when the time was right. But now, I just needed those arms. Pressed against his chest I could hear his heartbeat.
I dried my eyes and looked at him, "Taggart came by. They closed the case. Lack of evidence or leads or some shit like that." I stated, disgusted.
"That doesn't mean that everyone has stopped looking." He stated.
I looked up at him and for the first time realized what he had been doing.
"All the times you went out you were looking?"
He nodded.
I could not believe what I just heard. He had been out searching for the man who did this to me. He cared enough to take care of me and look for the man who did this. No one had ever cared about me this much. No one had ever even come close.
"Please, take me home." I asked.
And he did.
* * *
My sister Sarah said nothing when I moved out. My grandmother was very livid with her view but I left anyway.
It felt just like before when I lived with Jason, but so much better. He wasn't there as a friend to lean on, he was more than that. We weren't technically an item, but we had an understanding amongst eachother that we were more than friends.
Sonny forgave me for my *moment of insanity* and soon the three of us had dinner often. I became comfortable with him around and knew that Jason was right, that he could be trusted.
One night when Jason was away, I went across the hall and he welcomed me in with a smile.
"Are you worried about Jason?" He asked.
"Yes, I'm always worried. But so far he's always come back."
"And he will tonight." He said, holding up a glass to offer me a drink.
"No thank you." I said, having stayed away from it since my wild days before Port Charles.
I sat down on his couch and he joined me.
"If you know that, then why are you here?" He asked, concerned.
"Do you know where Jason is going? What he's doing?"
"No, he hasn't told me. Why?"
"He's trying to find someone for me."
"Who?"
"Someone who hurt me. I'm just afraid that if he does find him that he'll do something that he'll regret."
"Sweetheart, what do you mean?"
"Before I came to live with Jason, I was attacked."
"Attacked?"
"Raped." I said, silencing him for a while.
"I'm sorry." He said, backing away from me as if it might make me uncomfortable.
"You don't have to do that, I'm not going to break." I offered.
He stepped closer but still remained at a distance.
"But Jason is out looking for him. He's so invested in finding him that I'm afraid that if he does then . . ."
"You'll have to say goodbye to Jason for a while?" Sonny stated, completing my thought.
"Have you told him this?" He asked.
"No." I stated, feeling ashamed.
"Tell him, sweetheart. He'll listen." He said, knowingly.
* * * I didn't see Jason the rest of the night. I went upstairs to go to sleep when the phone began to ring.
Jason rarely called when he was out. He had done it more frequently when I had just begun to stay with him, but now he hardly called. I was surprised and rushed down the stairs. But it wasn't Jason.
"Hello?"
"Liz?"
I had to remind myself to breathe, "Steve?"
"Yeah."
"I cannot believe that it's you. God, it's been . . ."
"Too long. I heard from Sarah all the sordid details. So, what's the truth? Are you really staying with a mob hit man?"
I did not know how to respond. It was my brother, and I never lied to my brother. But Jason's job was his business, not mine to discuss.
"You know Sarah . . ." I started, changing the subject, but feeling horrible knowing that I was keeping anything from my brother.
"Yeah. I'm in New York at the moment and I was thinking that I might visit my favorite little sister when I stop in Port Charles tomorrow. I actually have some free time and might stay for awhile."
"STEVE!"
"I need an address to meet you."
I really wanted Steven and Jason to meet. But I wasn't sure how either would react to eachother. But they both are so much a part of my life that I want them to know of eachother.
"Could you meet me in the lobby of Harborview Towers?"
"Is that where you're . . . Sarah was being honest?"
"I'll see you there at noon." I said, avoiding the subject, and quickly hung up the phone.
* * * The next morning passed as it usually did. But before noon, around the time I normally started lunch or we would head out to eat out, I excused myself from the room and exited the penthouse. I took the elevator down to the lobby and waited eagerly. It had been years and I was eager to see my older brother.
At the same time I felt guilty for keeping a secret from Jason. I was afraid how he would react. But I quickly forgot this when I saw my older brother arrive.
He stepped in through the doors, characteristically early. I smiled, a feeling surging through my body that although so much had happened, I could still depend on the little things to remain the same.
He started looking around and he let his eyes pass over me once before letting them rest on me.
"Elizabeth?" He questioned.
I walked over, "Who else?"
He hugged me and then gave me the once over.
"Wow! Last time I saw you, you were my baby sister. Now, you're a woman."
I blushed and he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I guided him towards the elevator and as the doors opened I was not at all shocked to see Jason waiting.
I realized that he would notice me missing and frantically go searching, but I didn't realize it would happen as soon as it did. He barely stepped out of the elevator and just let our eyes meet. For a moment, I thought I almost saw jealously.
Steven noticed the look as well, "This must be the boyfriend."
He offered out his hand to shake but Jason remained stolid and I blushed dark red.
"He's just a friend." I explained as he finally put out his hand.
Steven looked as though he stumbled upon a secret that I was not yet privy to, and smiled. He and I stepped into the elevator and joined Jason.
"So . . . what do you do for a living?" Steve asked immediately.
I hit him playfully in the side but he did not withdrawal the question.
"Coffee." Jason answered.
"Coffee?" Steve asked, confused.
"He has a coffee warehouse." I informed him.
"Oh. Your business must be really lucrative to live in a place like this."
Jason said nothing and I could not get his eyes to meet mine.
When the elevator stopped at the penthouse floor, we all stepped out.
"How 'bout we go out to lunch?" I offered, to break the tense silence.
"Sure." Steve agreed.
"You two catch up." Jason offered and then went inside.
I told Steve to wait and followed Jason inside.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I know you don't like surprises. I just really wanted you two to meet eachother. He called yesterday while you were out and I was afraid that if I said something you would act like this."
He turned, "Don't apologize. He's your brother; you have the right to invite him over. Go, spend some time with him."
"But I wanted you two to get to know eachother. You're both such huge parts of my life that I hoped . . ." She paused.
I could tell that Jason did not want to let me down. He wanted to come along but something was holding him back. I didn't want to push him so I dropped the subject.
"I'll be back soon." I offered.
"Take your time."
I smiled and hesitantly shut the door.
"Ready?" Steve asked, looking concerned.
I smiled and let him lead me to the elevator. We rode down in silence, just the feeling of having him there made me feel as if every burden was lifted from my shoulders.
Of all places, he wanted to eat at Kelly's.
He noticed the difference the second we walked in.
"What's wrong?" He asked as I sat down at the corner table.
I wanted to tell him because I felt as if he deserved to know because I use to tell him everything. He use to be my confidant. But recently, Jason had been that person for me . . . and so much more. But I felt as if I told Steve then I would be betraying Jason in some way.
I knew that if Jason was there he would tell me that I was being silly. Except he wouldn't say it outright, he would just tell me to do what I wanted and not be concerned with what everyone else thought. But I was still hesitant.
Emily, whom was coerced by Bobbie to fill in for one of her absent waitresses, came over with a mixture of curiosity and surprise on her face.
"Liz . . . Hey!" She greeted me, and then turned towards Steve.
"Are you going to introduce us?" He asked after a minute of awkward silence.
"Oh . . . yeah . . . Emily this is my brother Steve, Steve this is . . ." I paused, unsure if I should introduce her as my friend or as Jason's sister.
Emily looked at me as if I had forgotten her name.
"Emily Quatermaine." I finished, simply, so I didn't have to make a decision.
They shook hands but Emily could tell that it wasn't the best time. She took our orders and avoided the small talk that Steve attempted to start.
"So, how'd you meet her? You a regular here?" He asked, nonchalantly.
"Mutual friend." I said, simply, not wanting him to bring up Jason.
But, as if he sensed it, he did.
"So, tell me all the sordid details of your love life." He inquired.
"I haven't got one." I answered.
"You haven't had one date since you got here months ago?" He asked, curious.
I couldn't lie to my brother. I had to tell him everything. And it had all started when I set up that date with Lucky Spencer.
"A few days after I moved here I had a date with a guy. It wasn't anything serious, but it never happened."
"What do you mean? Did he not show? Did you ditch him? Why so tight- lipped?" He asked.
"He showed only to tell me he couldn't stay. A friend of his had been ditched by their significant other and he wanted to comfort them. He was sorry, and I could see that, and we agreed we'd try it again."
"Doesn't sound all that bad of a guy, why didn't you two hook up?"
"The friend that had been ditched was Sarah."
"Oh . . ." He said, understandingly, knowing how it had always been between Sarah and me.
Emily interrupted us briefly to deliver our food and was off just as quickly as she had come. I made a mental note to explain and apologize later.
"What's with her?" Steve remarked, "She reminds me of Jason."
His comment seemed ironic to me and I cracked a slight smile. He looked at me confused as to how it was funny.
I explained, "Jason is her brother."
He thought for a moment, "Ahh . . . the mutual friend, I should have guessed."
"So, you met Jason before Emily?" He asked, trying to slyly lead into a conversation about my relationship with Jason.
"Something like that . . ." I offered, feeling the pressure of telling him what had happened creeping up on me.
He caught on, "What's wrong? Any mention of Jason and your love life and you are tight-lipped. You've never acted this way with me before, what's going on? Has he tried anything . . ." He started, and I knew exactly what he meant.
"NO! It's not like that." I started, "He . . . he saved me."
I closed my lips tight, knowing that I had begun the process of telling him. I knew how he would react.
**Flashback**
Elizabeth casually held the phone between her cheek and shoulder blade as she painted her nails on her left hand. In the midst of conversation she looked across the room at the mirror and scowled at her hair. She wondered what she could do with it and cursed herself for getting it cut short.
"So, do you know what you're going to wear yet?" Her friend Jill asked on the other end of the line.
"I was thinking my dark red shirt and that skirt I just got, the black one?"
"You are so lucky! Court is SO cute! I cannot believe he invited you to Brad's party!"
Elizabeth looked at the clock, "I have to go. I'll call you tonight when I get back."
She got dressed, managed to do something decent with her hair, and quickly corrected the two nails she had smudged in the process.
That same night, while at the party, she had not even second-guessed taking a drink from Court. When Court, the most popular guy in school offered you anything, you took it.
He carelessly had his arm around her shoulder and it was the most exhilarating and exciting experience of her teenage years. She smiled at him and he looked at her adoringly. He leaned in between sips and kissed her quickly. She couldn't help but smile.
She thought nothing of it when Court handed her another drink and another drink. But she began to feel the affects yet did not want to say anything and ruin her date.
She remembers him taking her hand and guiding her out of the main room and towards the bedroom. She remembers running into the door, giggling, and spilling her drink. He laughs with her and tells her to ignore the mess. He guides her towards the bed.
She falls back on it and he sits down beside her. He leans down next to her and looks at her adoringly.
Luckily for her, her friend Jill saw her go out of the room. Jill went to Steve, her date, and told him that she was worried about Elizabeth. Steve went into full protective-older-brother-mode and got there in time to save Elizabeth from something she would have regretted.
She remembers Steve pulling her out of the room and Court looking at her upset. It was obvious to Steve that Court was the type of guy who pulled that type of trick often and could tell by the smirk on his face that Elizabeth had been the only one to get away 'without any harm done'.
When Elizabeth was clear headed the next morning, Steve did not tell her the truth. He created a lie but it was to protect Elizabeth from the truth of what had almost taken place.
But months later he told her, having had the lie eat away at his insides. It was the hardest thing that he ever had to do. And when it was over, Elizabeth loved her brother more than she ever thought possible.
**End of Flashback**
I considered telling a lie of my own, concealing the truth so he might not attempt to rectify the situation in some way. But I hate liars and I never want to become one, especially to my own brother. My loving older brother that had lied to me once, and only once, and had apologized profusely afterwards.
"What happened, Liz?" He asked, and I could hear the pain in his voice.
I knew that he was angry for being kept out of the loop. But I knew, more than anything, that he was feeling guilty for leaving. I didn't want to make him feel worse and let him know that there was yet another man that had tried to take advantage and he was not there to be my savior.
"Do you remember what happened with Court Neylson?" I asked, timidly.
I knew that he had never forgotten. And in his eyes, at the mention of Court's name, I could see the same eyes I saw the day he told me what had truly happened that night. The eyes of a boy that had been sheltered most of his life that had finally had the blinders lifted.
"On Valentine's Day, when my date with Lucky got 'postponed', I ran to the park upset and ran into some trouble . . ." I said, my eyes shying away from his.
" . . . a man grabbed me from the bushes . . ." I started, not noticing that my eyes were wet.
"Lizzie!" He said, upset to learn the truth, and pushed his chair closer and surrounded me in those arms I was so use to.
"It's not your fault." I whispered, to stop him from blaming himself, which I knew he was doing.
"If I had been here . . ." He started.
I pushed out of his embrace, "I would have been grateful to have to here, but I'm not sure that would have been the best thing. I needed to lean on someone who didn't know me. I wouldn't want you to see me like that . . . again . . ."
A vile moan escaped his lips at the injustice of it all.
"I owe Jason an apology." He said, remembering from earlier that I had called him my 'savior' and now he knew why.
* * *
Jason was there when I got home. The minute I stepped into the penthouse, Jason could tell that something was amiss.
"What's wrong?" Jason asked, instantly.
"Nothing." I said, not in the mood to share after my encounter with my brother.
"Where's your brother?" He asked, curious.
"Back at his hotel. He needed some time after what I told him. . . He wanted you to know that he was sorry about before."
"You told him what happened?" He asked, surprised.
"Everything. He feels guilty that he wasn't there."
Jason was starting to see that Steve was not as bad as he had originally thought. No matter his opinion of the other man in Elizabeth's life, he knew that Steve cared about her and that was all that mattered.
He crossed the room and wrapped his arms around me.
I said nothing and just let him hold me. It made me happy to know that such a bad situation had given me something that I would never have otherwise, my relationship with Jason.
"You've been thinking about HIM. Haven't you?" He offered to end the silence.
He knows me too well.
"It's just that . . . I feel like I failed myself that night. If I remembered more than I might have been able to help the police catch him."
"Elizabeth, you tried to block it out. Why bring this up again if all it does is make you upset?"
"I just . . . If I had done something that night he would be off the street and he's still there. He could be hurting someone else and they might not have someone in their life to take care of them like I did."
He softly pushed a stray strand of my hair behind my ear and let his hand wonder on my cheek a little too long.
"I failed you that night." He offered, taking me back by surprised.
I flinched at his touch and he backed away, "Jason, you saved me!"
"If I had gotten there a little earlier . . ." He started, and I could see that he meant it. He felt responsible.
"Jason, we had barely met months before. Accidentally running into someone doesn't make you responsible for them. It's my fault I was there and no one else's."
"That was not your fault." He said immediately.
"If I had gone anywhere else . . ." I started, he interrupted, "Then we might not know eachother."
I looked up in his eyes and realized what I had gained and knew he was right. I had to stop over-analyzing the situation. IF questions lead nowhere and don't solve anything. I had to learn to move on.
He was silent for a moment, "If this is bothering you this much, there is something that might help you remember."
"What?" I asked, eager for answers.
"After my accident, they tried hypnotism to see if it could trigger any memories. The doctor said that in most cases where amnesia was involved, hypnotism is not the most effective. But it might be the right thing for you, if you really want to remember."
"I'd rather just forget, but I can't. I can't until I know that he is off the streets and cannot hurt anyone else. Before I wanted him caught out of vengeance, but now I just want justice."
"Do you want me to schedule the appointment?" He asked.
"Yes."