Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Firthuliel doesn't own anything. Except Vebrion. And Christina. And ourselves, Nilturiel and Firthuliel. I wish I owned Legolas. Or Orlando Bloom. Or even Will Turner. Although I would make him take a shower and cut his hair. Well, anyway, onward!

Chapter 5 Vebrion's revenge

Vebrion returned back to the palace guest house, right underneth Legolas' room. But the poor Legolas didn't know that. Vebrion told him they were in Moria.

"I'm back!" she said cheerily to her capturee. He looked up at her with disgust. She had kept him locked up in 'Moria' for the past week with only lembas to eat.

"What do you have?" he asked. She pulled out what was in her bag, a pair of scissors, tape, and a very long role of packaging material. "Materials for revenge." She answered.

Legolas gulped. "Revenge? What did I do?"

"You don't remember me do you? I was in your first grade class at Mirkwood Elementery. We were on the playground, I was sitting on the swings. You asked me to get up and I said no. You called me a stupid fat dwarf and pushed me off."

"You want revenge for that? I said I was sorry the next day. Besides we were little kids. What was this 3,000 years ago?"

"Yes it was. I finally hunted you down. I had to first stalk Geoffrey Rush because he is stalking Orlando Bloom. Orlando is stalking you for some strange reason I don't understand. So I stalked him for a while and he led me to you. You see, after my family moved to Anórien, I lost all contact with you. I had to find a way to get my revenge."

"I see. What are you going to do?" Legolas said.

"I am going to send you to the person who you are blackmailing. A person called Orlando Bloom. Would you please hold still while I tape you together?"

"NO!!! I will not give in to the dark side of the force. Never give in, never give up, never, never, never. Never give up, never surrender."

"Do you think you could fit any more quotes into that sentence?" Vebrion asked. "Well, if you hold still, I'll give you this nice big bottle of rum."

"Oh…okay then."

He held still while she tied him up. She tossed a few lembas crumbs into the bottom of the package. She never gave him the rum. When he was all tied up and packaged, she made air holes and put stamps on him. Then she went to go write a letter…