AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey everyone. Sorry it's been a while since I've written anything, lol. I've been REALLY busy.
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"Ok people, today's the final day before Wrestlemania XX, so I thought we should go on a little Nature Walk. It'll be good for you guys and it'll give you lots of exercise!" Steph addressed the gathering of superstars in the lobby.
Rey yawned, "But this early? It's four in the morning!"
"Yes, the earlier you start, the more exercise you get." Steph responded enthusiastically.
"No, no, NO! This is stupid!" Bitchy screeched.
"Shut up, you tard, you actually need the exercise. Where's Heyman? He needs it too!" Jade said.
"Are there trees? Lots of them?" Jeff asked anxiously.
"Well…we are going to be in a FOREST." Steph replied.
"Ok, just checking. Hey, isn't that Edge?" Jeff said looking confused as he watched Edge parade past looking like a zombie.
"Edge! Hello…Adam? Wake up!" Steph said, chasing after him.
"Wha-? Oh. Hi there, Stephanie." Edge said, coming out of his strange daze.
"Edge, what are you doing up here?" Kaley asked.
"Well, I found out from Shane that you guys were all here, so I figured I'd join you just in time for Wrestlemania. My doctor cleared me a while ago and I've been in OVW too long." Edge explained.
"Yay! You're back! Hurray!" Jade and Kaley said simultaneously.
"AHEM! If I have to go on this little 'Nature Walk,' I want to go NOW so I can get this over with!" Bitchy shouted at the group, all of which had gathered quickly around Edge, despite the early hour.
"Dude, are you coming with us on the Walk?" RVD asked Edge as the others started moving towards the door.
"Oh…Well, I might as well. It'll help get my legs back in shape."
"Right. Let's go. Now!" Bitch yelled from the doorway to where the others were waiting.
~*~
Once outside, the superstars noticed that the cows had mostly gone away.
"How'd you manage that, ass clown?" Jerky-the-ho asked.
"Um, what? The cows?" Bitchoff asked.
"What the hell did you think he meant? How'd you make the sky blue?" Steph said in a hostile tone. It was obviously too early for HER.
"Whoa. The sky is blue?" Bitch asked.
"Yeah, it is, you dumb ass. Isn't it amazing? Now walk!" Jade said with Rey beside her. "Do we have enough Doritos to the last the whole day?" She asked Rey.
"Of course. You guys got enough Skittles to last you?" he asked Kaley.
"We had better, or this Nature Walk is going to be taking a detour to a store and then to a tree for a while!" Kaley said evilly.
Jericho overheard them talking about their foods of choice and started pulling on Steph's arm. "We don't have any food. Are we going to die on the Nature Walk?"
"Some of you will if you continue to act like kindergartners!" she responded darkly as Jericho scuttled off to his friends- wait, does he have friends?
~*~
"Come ON! Come out of there, you don't look that bad. Really. We'll but you a wig. Maybe a new mask! I swear." Undertaker said pleadingly.
"How the hell long has he been in there?" Satan asked.
"Well…let's see…Since hell got recreated and one of those shit-eating ghost-creatures took his mask!" 'Taker responded.
"How is it my fault?"
"I didn't say it was. But I SHOULD blame you, since you're the only person around at the moment."
"Well, uh, look at it this way. There's nothing that's not already burning around here…"
Just then a bunch of wooden furniture popped out of nowhere and Kane began torching the items.
"Or…I could be wrong, I guess it works that way…" Satan murmured to himself.
Kane laughed gleefully until all of the items were reduced to charred cinders. More furniture appeared but 'Taker intervened.
"Ok, man, it's time to go back above ground!" He said. And they disappeared.
~*~
They hadn't been in the woods more than five minutes before Molly Holly began begging for a rest stop.
"Fine, we'll stop if you shut up." Stone Cold said.
"How is she the Women's Champion, anyhow?" Ivory asked Trish, who was beside her.
"I don't know, ask Gail Kim…if you can pry her away from Brock long enough to question her." She responded.
"What is he, some French Diplomat now?" Layce asked, joining into the conversation, "I don't even know what a diplomat is!"
"Me neither." said Trish.
Meanwhile, Kaley, Jade, Rey, and Jeff had stopped in a more secluded clearing, farther away from the rest of the group's area. Kaley and Jade were standing up when a bizarre form jumped out of the tree above them and landed on Kaley.
"What the- mmf- Help- mmf!" she screamed.
"Ahhh! How did that goddamned hobo find us?" Jade asked, "Jeff, go stop him!" she yelled, then began sprinting after Jake herself.
"Why are you here? You're supposed to be dead!"
"Ahhh…but I love you now, Kaley." Jacob said.
Kaley exchanged skeptical looks with Jade.
"You're still supposed to be dead!" Kaley said as Jeff ran up to them with an object in his hand.
"Kaley! I have grape jelly!" He shouted as he grew nearer.
"I don't need that right now, Jeffy. Thanks…where did you get it anyway?" She responded, still staring at Jacob.
"Why should she drop Jeff for you, Jake? You are a mini-golf course hobo! Plus you said that Jeff is a bad wrestler!" Jade said accusatorily.
"Hey!" Jeff said indignantly as he jumped up and started digging up dirt. Soon a large hole appeared.
Jake had been watching, horrified. "Nooooooooooo! You can't bury me! I'm still alive."
"That's the point." Jade said as she and Kaley held him tight so he couldn't ran away.
Jeff finished the hole and they dragged Jacob into the pit.
"Look at it this way. At least we're not throwing you into a flaming pit like the Brothers of Destruction would've done!" Kaley said cheerily.
They covered the hole then started back to the main group. As soon as they were within sight, Layce approached Kaley and Jade.
"In your educated opinion, are chocolate chips a good thing to use during sex? Like Skittle sex?" Layce said as the pair she was addressing exchanged amused glances once again.
"Well, I've never tried THAT before, but you could try it…" Kaley said.
"Yeah…me neither. But I would think they would melt?" Jade said.
"Yes! I'll use M&M's! They melt in your mouth, not in your hand! Rob will like that!" Layce said maniacally, then run off.
"Riiiiight…" Jade said and they followed the group again.
~*~ Five hours later ~*~
A ghostly form brushed past several members of the Nature Walk.
"What the hell it going on?" Kaley asked as something attached itself to her left leg. "Damn it Jacob! I thought you were dead…Again!" She reached down to remove his hands but hers went right through them.
"Aw damn, I knew killing him was a bad idea!" Jade said.
"What do you mean?"
"If a person is killed, or their soul is at unease because of a personal problem or something else in their life when they die, they don't leave this plane. I mean, their body goes, but their image and their soul remain forever unless you find one of those specialists who teaches ghosts how to move on." Jade explained.
"Oh." Kaley said, kicking at Jacob unsuccessfully. "That's not cool. Why didn't you say that before?"
"I don't know. Say you're sorry and you love him."
"No!"
"Oh, why are Flair and Trips here?" Jade asked.
"Bugging Steph out of her mind." Rey said, "Steven Richard's…headless…ghost is here, too. Since he is headless, he can't find Victoria."
"Hah!" Jade and Kaley burst out laughing and Rey grinned.
~*~ At the head of the Nature Walk party ~*~
"I said Nature Walk not Nature Boy!" Steph shouted.
"I believe it is time to get the hell out of here." Stone Cold shouted back.
"Ok!" Bitch yelled, then turned around, "We're going back now!" he said to the superstars amidst all of the shouting and altogether chaos.
~*~ Back in Back ~*~
They all turned around, and Jeff's group of four waited until everyone, including the ghosties, had passed before they resumed their walking.
Thunk.
"Ah fuck! What the hell was that?" Jade said, rubbing her head. "Why the hell are hockey pucks being chucked at me!?"
Mini-golf course hobo number two, Cody, jumped out of a nearby tree with a hockey stick and started beating Jericho over the head with it. He sustained multiple bruises and cuts before the retard could be removed from him.
Cody ended up chasing all of them back to the hotel. Once there, he gave up after they locked him out of the whole building. He then jumped onto a random wandering cow and rode away into the sunset.
"Oh good grief. Let's go pack." Jade said as she watched him ride away.
~*~
"Mark! You moron! Where are we?" Kane asked.
"Well, I think we are in Timbuktu!" Undertaker said.
"Shut up!"
"No, literally. It's a small town in Africa."
"Really?"
"Uh…yeah…I just said that, didn't I?"
"Oh. Cool. Now I can burn all these little huts!"
"Cool, but hurry, we have to get back to the Kalahari soon." Undertaker relented.
"Hurray!" Kane said amongst screams of alarm and the sound of crackling fire.
Once he set the final house ablaze, he ran back to the Undertaker.
"Ok. Let's go. I'm happy." Kane said with a horrible grin on his face.
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Hope you like it! The next chapter should be the last one, but we'll see. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to end this, besides with the Wrestlemania XX match.
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"Ok people, today's the final day before Wrestlemania XX, so I thought we should go on a little Nature Walk. It'll be good for you guys and it'll give you lots of exercise!" Steph addressed the gathering of superstars in the lobby.
Rey yawned, "But this early? It's four in the morning!"
"Yes, the earlier you start, the more exercise you get." Steph responded enthusiastically.
"No, no, NO! This is stupid!" Bitchy screeched.
"Shut up, you tard, you actually need the exercise. Where's Heyman? He needs it too!" Jade said.
"Are there trees? Lots of them?" Jeff asked anxiously.
"Well…we are going to be in a FOREST." Steph replied.
"Ok, just checking. Hey, isn't that Edge?" Jeff said looking confused as he watched Edge parade past looking like a zombie.
"Edge! Hello…Adam? Wake up!" Steph said, chasing after him.
"Wha-? Oh. Hi there, Stephanie." Edge said, coming out of his strange daze.
"Edge, what are you doing up here?" Kaley asked.
"Well, I found out from Shane that you guys were all here, so I figured I'd join you just in time for Wrestlemania. My doctor cleared me a while ago and I've been in OVW too long." Edge explained.
"Yay! You're back! Hurray!" Jade and Kaley said simultaneously.
"AHEM! If I have to go on this little 'Nature Walk,' I want to go NOW so I can get this over with!" Bitchy shouted at the group, all of which had gathered quickly around Edge, despite the early hour.
"Dude, are you coming with us on the Walk?" RVD asked Edge as the others started moving towards the door.
"Oh…Well, I might as well. It'll help get my legs back in shape."
"Right. Let's go. Now!" Bitch yelled from the doorway to where the others were waiting.
~*~
Once outside, the superstars noticed that the cows had mostly gone away.
"How'd you manage that, ass clown?" Jerky-the-ho asked.
"Um, what? The cows?" Bitchoff asked.
"What the hell did you think he meant? How'd you make the sky blue?" Steph said in a hostile tone. It was obviously too early for HER.
"Whoa. The sky is blue?" Bitch asked.
"Yeah, it is, you dumb ass. Isn't it amazing? Now walk!" Jade said with Rey beside her. "Do we have enough Doritos to the last the whole day?" She asked Rey.
"Of course. You guys got enough Skittles to last you?" he asked Kaley.
"We had better, or this Nature Walk is going to be taking a detour to a store and then to a tree for a while!" Kaley said evilly.
Jericho overheard them talking about their foods of choice and started pulling on Steph's arm. "We don't have any food. Are we going to die on the Nature Walk?"
"Some of you will if you continue to act like kindergartners!" she responded darkly as Jericho scuttled off to his friends- wait, does he have friends?
~*~
"Come ON! Come out of there, you don't look that bad. Really. We'll but you a wig. Maybe a new mask! I swear." Undertaker said pleadingly.
"How the hell long has he been in there?" Satan asked.
"Well…let's see…Since hell got recreated and one of those shit-eating ghost-creatures took his mask!" 'Taker responded.
"How is it my fault?"
"I didn't say it was. But I SHOULD blame you, since you're the only person around at the moment."
"Well, uh, look at it this way. There's nothing that's not already burning around here…"
Just then a bunch of wooden furniture popped out of nowhere and Kane began torching the items.
"Or…I could be wrong, I guess it works that way…" Satan murmured to himself.
Kane laughed gleefully until all of the items were reduced to charred cinders. More furniture appeared but 'Taker intervened.
"Ok, man, it's time to go back above ground!" He said. And they disappeared.
~*~
They hadn't been in the woods more than five minutes before Molly Holly began begging for a rest stop.
"Fine, we'll stop if you shut up." Stone Cold said.
"How is she the Women's Champion, anyhow?" Ivory asked Trish, who was beside her.
"I don't know, ask Gail Kim…if you can pry her away from Brock long enough to question her." She responded.
"What is he, some French Diplomat now?" Layce asked, joining into the conversation, "I don't even know what a diplomat is!"
"Me neither." said Trish.
Meanwhile, Kaley, Jade, Rey, and Jeff had stopped in a more secluded clearing, farther away from the rest of the group's area. Kaley and Jade were standing up when a bizarre form jumped out of the tree above them and landed on Kaley.
"What the- mmf- Help- mmf!" she screamed.
"Ahhh! How did that goddamned hobo find us?" Jade asked, "Jeff, go stop him!" she yelled, then began sprinting after Jake herself.
"Why are you here? You're supposed to be dead!"
"Ahhh…but I love you now, Kaley." Jacob said.
Kaley exchanged skeptical looks with Jade.
"You're still supposed to be dead!" Kaley said as Jeff ran up to them with an object in his hand.
"Kaley! I have grape jelly!" He shouted as he grew nearer.
"I don't need that right now, Jeffy. Thanks…where did you get it anyway?" She responded, still staring at Jacob.
"Why should she drop Jeff for you, Jake? You are a mini-golf course hobo! Plus you said that Jeff is a bad wrestler!" Jade said accusatorily.
"Hey!" Jeff said indignantly as he jumped up and started digging up dirt. Soon a large hole appeared.
Jake had been watching, horrified. "Nooooooooooo! You can't bury me! I'm still alive."
"That's the point." Jade said as she and Kaley held him tight so he couldn't ran away.
Jeff finished the hole and they dragged Jacob into the pit.
"Look at it this way. At least we're not throwing you into a flaming pit like the Brothers of Destruction would've done!" Kaley said cheerily.
They covered the hole then started back to the main group. As soon as they were within sight, Layce approached Kaley and Jade.
"In your educated opinion, are chocolate chips a good thing to use during sex? Like Skittle sex?" Layce said as the pair she was addressing exchanged amused glances once again.
"Well, I've never tried THAT before, but you could try it…" Kaley said.
"Yeah…me neither. But I would think they would melt?" Jade said.
"Yes! I'll use M&M's! They melt in your mouth, not in your hand! Rob will like that!" Layce said maniacally, then run off.
"Riiiiight…" Jade said and they followed the group again.
~*~ Five hours later ~*~
A ghostly form brushed past several members of the Nature Walk.
"What the hell it going on?" Kaley asked as something attached itself to her left leg. "Damn it Jacob! I thought you were dead…Again!" She reached down to remove his hands but hers went right through them.
"Aw damn, I knew killing him was a bad idea!" Jade said.
"What do you mean?"
"If a person is killed, or their soul is at unease because of a personal problem or something else in their life when they die, they don't leave this plane. I mean, their body goes, but their image and their soul remain forever unless you find one of those specialists who teaches ghosts how to move on." Jade explained.
"Oh." Kaley said, kicking at Jacob unsuccessfully. "That's not cool. Why didn't you say that before?"
"I don't know. Say you're sorry and you love him."
"No!"
"Oh, why are Flair and Trips here?" Jade asked.
"Bugging Steph out of her mind." Rey said, "Steven Richard's…headless…ghost is here, too. Since he is headless, he can't find Victoria."
"Hah!" Jade and Kaley burst out laughing and Rey grinned.
~*~ At the head of the Nature Walk party ~*~
"I said Nature Walk not Nature Boy!" Steph shouted.
"I believe it is time to get the hell out of here." Stone Cold shouted back.
"Ok!" Bitch yelled, then turned around, "We're going back now!" he said to the superstars amidst all of the shouting and altogether chaos.
~*~ Back in Back ~*~
They all turned around, and Jeff's group of four waited until everyone, including the ghosties, had passed before they resumed their walking.
Thunk.
"Ah fuck! What the hell was that?" Jade said, rubbing her head. "Why the hell are hockey pucks being chucked at me!?"
Mini-golf course hobo number two, Cody, jumped out of a nearby tree with a hockey stick and started beating Jericho over the head with it. He sustained multiple bruises and cuts before the retard could be removed from him.
Cody ended up chasing all of them back to the hotel. Once there, he gave up after they locked him out of the whole building. He then jumped onto a random wandering cow and rode away into the sunset.
"Oh good grief. Let's go pack." Jade said as she watched him ride away.
~*~
"Mark! You moron! Where are we?" Kane asked.
"Well, I think we are in Timbuktu!" Undertaker said.
"Shut up!"
"No, literally. It's a small town in Africa."
"Really?"
"Uh…yeah…I just said that, didn't I?"
"Oh. Cool. Now I can burn all these little huts!"
"Cool, but hurry, we have to get back to the Kalahari soon." Undertaker relented.
"Hurray!" Kane said amongst screams of alarm and the sound of crackling fire.
Once he set the final house ablaze, he ran back to the Undertaker.
"Ok. Let's go. I'm happy." Kane said with a horrible grin on his face.
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Hope you like it! The next chapter should be the last one, but we'll see. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to end this, besides with the Wrestlemania XX match.