Title: Nonsense
Fandom: Boy Meets World
Pairing: Shawn/Cory implied
Disclaimer: So not mine.
Summary: Cory doesn't get it.
Notes: Takes place after the second season episode "The Uninvited." Also references some events from that episode. Written in about a half-an-hour for a challenge at Contre la Montre,
Lemme tell you something—my friend Shawn could have the world at its knees if he wanted to. I mean, he may say he isn't the smartest kid, but it isn't about being the smartest kid. What Shawn has is something the smart kids wish they had. Charisma. Cool. He's got style, flair, people skills. And he knows how to use it. He could bre the most cripplingly cool kid ever to come to John Adams High School, and he could go from there to most cripplingly cool person ever, and maybe president or a movie star or something.
But something is holding him back: me. Uncool, uncoordinated, brillo-haired Cory Matthews—scourge of the deep, hideous undersea monster of John Adams High. I lurk in dark places where others fear to come, and I'm why they fear to come there. I'm the safest, least cool, dorkiest kid to ever walk the halls here. I could bring anyone down. I could bring the coolest person ever down. And I am. Shawn.
Obviously, the boy is nuts. Completely and totally nuts. I run into Chubbie's one night to tell him to drop me and hang with the cool kids, and he doesn't blow me off! Can you believe it? I tell him it's a cool kid's party and he makes us leave! Just gets up and decides he shouldn't be there! I was ready to drag him back in there and sit him down at the table then hightail it out of there, but he's bigger than I am, and stronger, because he's a cool kid and I'm a geek. You guys know how this works, you look like you were in high school once. So there the two of us are, outside, away from the cool kids, and I have no idea what's going on. So I turns to him, I says "Shawn, what are you doing?" And he just looks at me, like he has no idea what I'm asking. "We're walking, Cory. We do it daily." And I look at him, you know the 'that's not what I meant' look. Everyone gives it sometimes. "That's not what I meant," I say, just to make sure he knows. "Why aren't you down there?" And he looks at me, with that 'that's the dumbest question I've ever heard' look. You know that one too. It's a teacher look, because even though they tell you there are no dumb questions, there are, and they know it. Liars. Anyway. He says, "Because you're up here." Which is right up there on the dumbest responses I've ever heard. Who cares where I am? I couldn't have the world at its knees if I tried. It'd just laugh at me for trying.
So Shawn doesn't go near the cool kid parties anymore, because I don't get invited. Of course I don't get invited! Look at my hair! Have you felt this stuff? It's like steel wool. What kind of girl wants to run her hands through steel wool? Probably one who isn't allowed anywhere near pointed objects and has padding on her walls! Shawn has the cool guy hair. He spends half his time just running his hands through it to make sure it looks good, because his hair doesn't spring back into its original shape as soon as he lets go! And that, my friends, is what makes him cool and me a loser.
What's that? You're asking why we're friends? Thank you! That's what iI've/i been asking! It just doesn't add up. The only logical explanation is that Shawn is an alien who wants to harvest my organs. But why harvest my organs, when he could harvest cool ones? Maybe I'm more disposable.
It just doesn't make sense, any way you look at it. He's got everything going for him, and he chooses me over it! If it made any sense, it could give me a big head, but it just doesn't. Anytime I ask why, he'll just tell me "You're Cory and I'm Shawn. That's why." Like that makes sense.
My friend Shawn. Doesn't make any sense.