Fez
"I'm in heaven!! I got to share a room with Jackie and now we're off
to find me some whores. How much better can this get? Oh, I know how
about Jackie and Donna give us a little show. Ladies..if you feel the
need to make out go right ahead."
That's as far as I got before two pair of hands slapped me upside the
head. Ow that hurt, damn they hit hard for a couple of girls. I
started to rub my head where they hit me when Kelso started to talk
to me so I turned to him.
"So Fez, what did you do last night uh??? How did you sleep? Did you
try to hit on my girl, because if you did I'm so gonna kick your ass
for that."
Then Hyde hit him in the back of the head, oh he's so nice. Wait did
Hyde hit Kelso for me or for talking about his beloved Jackie saying
that she's his girl? Well if you ask me neither deserve Jackie for
being dumbasses. If I had her I would treat her like a queen. I can
just picture us now...and then before I even got to picture a hot and
sexy fantasy my queen herself spoke.
"You know the guy who worked at the front desk told me about a theme
park that's around here. He said it would be fun and there are a lot
of rides and games, I think we should go."
"What where you talking to other guys for, uh Jackie? If you wanted
to talk to other guys besides short and kosher over there, you could
of have talked to me. I'm a guy and I want to talk to you."
My man pretty friend told Jackie waiting for her to apologize. I saw
Jackie just starring at Kelso looking annoyed and ready to bite his
head off. I feel bad for Jackie because both of her boyfriends, we'll
her ex-boyfriends now cheated on her. If I where her boyfriend I
would not cheat on her. I'd love to make sweet sweaty sex to her and
then eat some candy with her, and maybe share them. Maybe. Candy's my
first love, sorry Jackie.
Then I saw Donna and Eric talking to each other and I wanted to know
what they where talking about, if they're talking about me I want to
know. So I decided to ask, "So guys what you talking about? Are you
trying to figure out how to help me with my needs?"
Aye, I think that came out wrong because they're all looking at me
weirdly. Someone else talk please, someone else talk now please, god
please let someone else talk. And then I was relieved when Donna
spoke up and said something.
"Yeah I was with Jackie when he told us about the theme park and he
said it's really fun. It's like fun land except there's no woolfie,
and no one singing when you ask them what time it is. He gave me the
directions in case we wanted to go. So you guys want to go?"
Oh my, maybe they'll be lots of girl for Fez or even better tons of
candy. "Oh, Fez is in. Maybe if we're lucky I will find someone to do
it with."
"Ok Fez, whatever you say buddy."
"What you don't think I can get lucky Hyde?" Son of a bitch, he
thinks I can't get lucky, I can get lucky. Oh damn, he's right I
won`t get lucky. Dill hole, burst my beautiful bubble like that.
Right after that we got up from the breakfast table and went to our
rooms to get all our stuff to go to the amusement park. I am so
excited to go, I wonder what I should wear to look sexy. I'll just
ask Jackie when we go back to our room, or maybe I'll just watch her
change. Yeah I'll do that, I'll just go and hide in the closet. Damn
I hope she doesn't kick me again like she did this morning.
Theme park
At first we got a little lost, San Jose is kinda big. We saw that
there's a swap meet but they call it a flea market and it was huge
and it looked like fun so we all decided to go tomorrow. I notice all
the pretty girls all around and I am now so excited. We're on a
mission, a mission to get me a girl. We all chose to come to this
road trip to get me a girl and I'm sure they didn't come for
themselves. I hope, sons of bitches.
Wow, we're here and the park looks extremely big and full of people;
for sure we'll be able to find my a girl in here. How hard can it
get?
"Alright we're here. Yay!!!! Now let's go get me a new girlfriend."
"Fez, I don't know if we're going to be able to get girl to talk to
you. I don't think a lot of girls around here would want a foreigner
as a boyfriend."
Jackie told me that giving me a sympathetic look, I know she's just
jealous because she doesn't have me and doesn't want anyone else to
have me.
"Jackie I know you're just jealous that I am going to hook up with
another girl and you wont have my love no more. But you know, if you
want me that bad you can always show me how much you love me by
taking off your shirt." Then the little midget hit me in the arm.
"Ow, you don't have to hit me you midget."
A few minutes later we where all in the park and was huge. There are
balloons every where, girls, rides, water, food, and oh my gosh
CANDY!!!!! I immediately ran towards the candy but before I can even
get to it I feel someone grab me by the shirt and pull me back. Damn
Hyde.
"Not so fast Fez, you're gonna get lost."
"But Hyde there's candy over there with my name written all over it.
I have to get some sweet delivers candy before all those fools eat
it." Then Donna turns my face to make me look at her and I don't know
if I should be turned on or scared, but I think I'm going to go for
scared. She's a giant, she can crush me if she wanted to.
"Not yet Fez, we have to agree to meet at somewhere at a certain time
just in case we get lost. Let's try not to get separated from each
other, if we do let's make sure we stay in groups of two. And Kelso
don't you dare go and get lost or I'm gonna kick your ass. I think we
should meet right here in the entrance, say at 6:30. How does that
sound?"
Right after everyone agreed I grabbed Jackie by the hand and ran to
the candy.
"Fez, what are you doing? Hold on you`re going to make me fall, and I
don`t want to get dirty. If I get dirty it`s going to be your all
your fault."
"Hurry Jackie before all the candy is gone. I would of have come by
myself but Donna said not to leave by myself and to be in groups of
two."
"Ok, ok Fez. But if you get me all dirty you`re going to have to buy
me a new one. And do you know how expensive this outfit is? Just
remember that."
I bought my candy and some cotton candy from the stand and turned to
the gang to see what's next. I noticed that it was only me Jackie,
Kelso and Hyde. Apparently Donna and Eric must of have gotten lost, I
wonder what they're doing? And they better not be doing it, if I
can't do it neither should they.
"So guys where should we go next? And Michael don't you dare walk
away by yourself or I'm gonna kick really, really hard."
"Damn Jackie, you don't have to be violent. Oh I know let's go to
that ride right there. The one where it looks like it's going to drop
you but it wont. You see, it didn't drop those people it brought them
back up and then to the side and then to the other side. Last one to
the line is a rotten egg."
Oh I'm not going to be a rotten egg, so I better hurry up and run to
the line. Kelso got there before me and then I turned back to see
that Jackie and Hyde where just walking up to us.
"Oh well it looks like Jackie and Hyde are both the rotten eggs. See
because me and Kelso got here before you, so we're not the rotten
eggs." Jackie just looked at me and Hyde rolled his eyes at me , they
can't handle the heat.
"I'm not going on this ride I'll wait up for you guys."
Jackie said almost very quietly for us to hear and then almost
started to walk away, but Hyde just grabbed her arm.
"Come on don't be a chicken. I'll sit next to you and hold your
hand...I mean if you want to."
"Why do you get to sit next to her Hyde? I'll sit next to you Jackie
and I'll hold your hand if you want to, too."
Uh, oh I saw the fight ready to begin once again from my friends so I
thought I could take advantage of the situation and take Jackie away
from both of them. Poor unsuspected fools.
"Oh my sweet Jackie I will sit next to you if you want, and I'll hold
your hand if you get scared. Don't worry Fez will not let anything
happen to you."
"Ok, I'll get on it. Come on Fez."
With that me and Jackie started to walk in front of the other two
unsuspecting idiots towards the line. All I heard was Kelso sounding
like a little girl whining and Hyde looking like he was ready to jump
me. Suckers.
We finally got in front of the line and we all decided to get in the
front of the ride. The ride seated for people in a row so we all got
to sit together. We started to walk towards our seats and I sat in
the corner with Jackie next to me and Hyde next to her and Kelso on
the other corner. Then after we where seated they ride took off and I
was so excited. Then the ride got a little scary for me, but then
after Jackie grabbed my hand I was the happiest man in this world.
She didn't even grabbed Hyde's hand who was sitting next to her.
Fools, my plan to seduce Jackie will work out after all. After the
ride was over we started to walk off to look for another ride and
suddenly I can't seem to move. Holy mother of god, it's a candy store
in a theme park. Have I died and gone to candy heaven?
"Come on Fez, I see a bunch of hot girls over there giving me the
eye. Let's go see if we can get lucky."
Then Kelso tries to pull me towards a bunch of girls but I can't.
"Screw the girls I wanna buy me lots of candy from there."
"Fez, buddy maybe you'll get lucky. Come one lets go talk to them."
"I said no you son of a bitch, don't you understand? I said I want
candy."
"But Fez.."
"I said candy."
"Fez."
"CANDY!!!"
Gosh can't he ever listen to me? With that said I am now running
towards the candy store with Jackie, Hyde and Kelso right behind me.
"Oh my gosh, I am in heaven. Look lollipops, chocolate, and candy
apples. What do I get? I want it all."
"Fez, don't you ever get sick of candy?" "Hyde, how dare you say that
about this lovely, sweet precious candy?"
"Whatever."
How dare he say that about my precious candy. I'm just going to
pretend he didn't say that and get my candy. A few minutes later I
grabbed all I could from the candy stores from lollipops, candle
apples, hard candy, chewy candy and lots of chocolates. After I paid
we walked outside and noticed Kelso was already standing there
talking to a group of beautiful women. Maybe now I can go get some
lovin from this ladies so I walked up to them.
"Why hello you lovely ladies. My name is Fez, the goddess of
sexiness." I am standing right in between two blonde girls who are a
little taller then Jackie, and Kelso is standing by two brunettes and
a red head. They all stare at me like I'm so kind of weirdo, and I
know they want me. Who can resist me? I mean look at me, I am one hot
sexy goddess. Just then Hyde and Jackie walked up to us and the
beautiful blonde next to me seemed to be interested in Hyde. Damn
Hyde always taking up all the whores.
"Hi there, I'm Tiffany. What's you're name?"
I saw Hyde just smirk at her and raise his eyebrow and ready to
answer when Jackie hit him in the back of the head and then turned to
look at me and grabbed my arm.
"Come on Fez, let's go to that ride over there."
"Yay!!!! Let's go."
And then we started to walk away and I heard Kelso yell at Hyde.
"Burn!!!"
"Shut up Kelso."
"Ow, damn Hyde you don't have to hit me."
Two hours later We went to a few rides and had fun. Then we started
to talk about our hair.
"Yeah, Fez just leave in your conditioner to get so much softer hair
like mine, and shinier and more bouncy. You have to take care of your
hair, it's about 80% of your beauty you know. I mean can you imagine
me with this beautiful face and body but with nasty hair, splits ends
and dirty?"
"No, that would be awful. I try to get my hair to look softer and
more shinier. What do you recommend I should use?"
"You can try to use the conditioner I use it's called.." Then we
where interrupted by the others who bumped into us.
"Hey guys, where'd you go?"
This time Donna and Eric came with Kelso and Hyde. We all then
decided to go to another ride before we went to grab a bite to eat. I
was having a fun day so far, I got on a lot of rides with Jackie and
we even hung out and talked about our hair and clothes. After the
ride I started to feel a little sick.
"Guys I don't feel so good."
Donna and Jackie looked at me and backed up a little. Then Kelso
looked at me and spoke,
"What's wrong little buddy? You look kinda green. You're not gonna
puke are you? Because if you are do it to your left and don't get any
chunks on me. I'm sure Hyde wouldn't mind if you blew chunks his way.
Right Hyde?"
"Fez if you blow chunks on me I'm going to kick your ass."
"Uh, oh."
Then all of a sudden I started it blowing chunks getting it all over
Hyde and Eric. They will not be happy about this.
"I'm in heaven!! I got to share a room with Jackie and now we're off
to find me some whores. How much better can this get? Oh, I know how
about Jackie and Donna give us a little show. Ladies..if you feel the
need to make out go right ahead."
That's as far as I got before two pair of hands slapped me upside the
head. Ow that hurt, damn they hit hard for a couple of girls. I
started to rub my head where they hit me when Kelso started to talk
to me so I turned to him.
"So Fez, what did you do last night uh??? How did you sleep? Did you
try to hit on my girl, because if you did I'm so gonna kick your ass
for that."
Then Hyde hit him in the back of the head, oh he's so nice. Wait did
Hyde hit Kelso for me or for talking about his beloved Jackie saying
that she's his girl? Well if you ask me neither deserve Jackie for
being dumbasses. If I had her I would treat her like a queen. I can
just picture us now...and then before I even got to picture a hot and
sexy fantasy my queen herself spoke.
"You know the guy who worked at the front desk told me about a theme
park that's around here. He said it would be fun and there are a lot
of rides and games, I think we should go."
"What where you talking to other guys for, uh Jackie? If you wanted
to talk to other guys besides short and kosher over there, you could
of have talked to me. I'm a guy and I want to talk to you."
My man pretty friend told Jackie waiting for her to apologize. I saw
Jackie just starring at Kelso looking annoyed and ready to bite his
head off. I feel bad for Jackie because both of her boyfriends, we'll
her ex-boyfriends now cheated on her. If I where her boyfriend I
would not cheat on her. I'd love to make sweet sweaty sex to her and
then eat some candy with her, and maybe share them. Maybe. Candy's my
first love, sorry Jackie.
Then I saw Donna and Eric talking to each other and I wanted to know
what they where talking about, if they're talking about me I want to
know. So I decided to ask, "So guys what you talking about? Are you
trying to figure out how to help me with my needs?"
Aye, I think that came out wrong because they're all looking at me
weirdly. Someone else talk please, someone else talk now please, god
please let someone else talk. And then I was relieved when Donna
spoke up and said something.
"Yeah I was with Jackie when he told us about the theme park and he
said it's really fun. It's like fun land except there's no woolfie,
and no one singing when you ask them what time it is. He gave me the
directions in case we wanted to go. So you guys want to go?"
Oh my, maybe they'll be lots of girl for Fez or even better tons of
candy. "Oh, Fez is in. Maybe if we're lucky I will find someone to do
it with."
"Ok Fez, whatever you say buddy."
"What you don't think I can get lucky Hyde?" Son of a bitch, he
thinks I can't get lucky, I can get lucky. Oh damn, he's right I
won`t get lucky. Dill hole, burst my beautiful bubble like that.
Right after that we got up from the breakfast table and went to our
rooms to get all our stuff to go to the amusement park. I am so
excited to go, I wonder what I should wear to look sexy. I'll just
ask Jackie when we go back to our room, or maybe I'll just watch her
change. Yeah I'll do that, I'll just go and hide in the closet. Damn
I hope she doesn't kick me again like she did this morning.
Theme park
At first we got a little lost, San Jose is kinda big. We saw that
there's a swap meet but they call it a flea market and it was huge
and it looked like fun so we all decided to go tomorrow. I notice all
the pretty girls all around and I am now so excited. We're on a
mission, a mission to get me a girl. We all chose to come to this
road trip to get me a girl and I'm sure they didn't come for
themselves. I hope, sons of bitches.
Wow, we're here and the park looks extremely big and full of people;
for sure we'll be able to find my a girl in here. How hard can it
get?
"Alright we're here. Yay!!!! Now let's go get me a new girlfriend."
"Fez, I don't know if we're going to be able to get girl to talk to
you. I don't think a lot of girls around here would want a foreigner
as a boyfriend."
Jackie told me that giving me a sympathetic look, I know she's just
jealous because she doesn't have me and doesn't want anyone else to
have me.
"Jackie I know you're just jealous that I am going to hook up with
another girl and you wont have my love no more. But you know, if you
want me that bad you can always show me how much you love me by
taking off your shirt." Then the little midget hit me in the arm.
"Ow, you don't have to hit me you midget."
A few minutes later we where all in the park and was huge. There are
balloons every where, girls, rides, water, food, and oh my gosh
CANDY!!!!! I immediately ran towards the candy but before I can even
get to it I feel someone grab me by the shirt and pull me back. Damn
Hyde.
"Not so fast Fez, you're gonna get lost."
"But Hyde there's candy over there with my name written all over it.
I have to get some sweet delivers candy before all those fools eat
it." Then Donna turns my face to make me look at her and I don't know
if I should be turned on or scared, but I think I'm going to go for
scared. She's a giant, she can crush me if she wanted to.
"Not yet Fez, we have to agree to meet at somewhere at a certain time
just in case we get lost. Let's try not to get separated from each
other, if we do let's make sure we stay in groups of two. And Kelso
don't you dare go and get lost or I'm gonna kick your ass. I think we
should meet right here in the entrance, say at 6:30. How does that
sound?"
Right after everyone agreed I grabbed Jackie by the hand and ran to
the candy.
"Fez, what are you doing? Hold on you`re going to make me fall, and I
don`t want to get dirty. If I get dirty it`s going to be your all
your fault."
"Hurry Jackie before all the candy is gone. I would of have come by
myself but Donna said not to leave by myself and to be in groups of
two."
"Ok, ok Fez. But if you get me all dirty you`re going to have to buy
me a new one. And do you know how expensive this outfit is? Just
remember that."
I bought my candy and some cotton candy from the stand and turned to
the gang to see what's next. I noticed that it was only me Jackie,
Kelso and Hyde. Apparently Donna and Eric must of have gotten lost, I
wonder what they're doing? And they better not be doing it, if I
can't do it neither should they.
"So guys where should we go next? And Michael don't you dare walk
away by yourself or I'm gonna kick really, really hard."
"Damn Jackie, you don't have to be violent. Oh I know let's go to
that ride right there. The one where it looks like it's going to drop
you but it wont. You see, it didn't drop those people it brought them
back up and then to the side and then to the other side. Last one to
the line is a rotten egg."
Oh I'm not going to be a rotten egg, so I better hurry up and run to
the line. Kelso got there before me and then I turned back to see
that Jackie and Hyde where just walking up to us.
"Oh well it looks like Jackie and Hyde are both the rotten eggs. See
because me and Kelso got here before you, so we're not the rotten
eggs." Jackie just looked at me and Hyde rolled his eyes at me , they
can't handle the heat.
"I'm not going on this ride I'll wait up for you guys."
Jackie said almost very quietly for us to hear and then almost
started to walk away, but Hyde just grabbed her arm.
"Come on don't be a chicken. I'll sit next to you and hold your
hand...I mean if you want to."
"Why do you get to sit next to her Hyde? I'll sit next to you Jackie
and I'll hold your hand if you want to, too."
Uh, oh I saw the fight ready to begin once again from my friends so I
thought I could take advantage of the situation and take Jackie away
from both of them. Poor unsuspected fools.
"Oh my sweet Jackie I will sit next to you if you want, and I'll hold
your hand if you get scared. Don't worry Fez will not let anything
happen to you."
"Ok, I'll get on it. Come on Fez."
With that me and Jackie started to walk in front of the other two
unsuspecting idiots towards the line. All I heard was Kelso sounding
like a little girl whining and Hyde looking like he was ready to jump
me. Suckers.
We finally got in front of the line and we all decided to get in the
front of the ride. The ride seated for people in a row so we all got
to sit together. We started to walk towards our seats and I sat in
the corner with Jackie next to me and Hyde next to her and Kelso on
the other corner. Then after we where seated they ride took off and I
was so excited. Then the ride got a little scary for me, but then
after Jackie grabbed my hand I was the happiest man in this world.
She didn't even grabbed Hyde's hand who was sitting next to her.
Fools, my plan to seduce Jackie will work out after all. After the
ride was over we started to walk off to look for another ride and
suddenly I can't seem to move. Holy mother of god, it's a candy store
in a theme park. Have I died and gone to candy heaven?
"Come on Fez, I see a bunch of hot girls over there giving me the
eye. Let's go see if we can get lucky."
Then Kelso tries to pull me towards a bunch of girls but I can't.
"Screw the girls I wanna buy me lots of candy from there."
"Fez, buddy maybe you'll get lucky. Come one lets go talk to them."
"I said no you son of a bitch, don't you understand? I said I want
candy."
"But Fez.."
"I said candy."
"Fez."
"CANDY!!!"
Gosh can't he ever listen to me? With that said I am now running
towards the candy store with Jackie, Hyde and Kelso right behind me.
"Oh my gosh, I am in heaven. Look lollipops, chocolate, and candy
apples. What do I get? I want it all."
"Fez, don't you ever get sick of candy?" "Hyde, how dare you say that
about this lovely, sweet precious candy?"
"Whatever."
How dare he say that about my precious candy. I'm just going to
pretend he didn't say that and get my candy. A few minutes later I
grabbed all I could from the candy stores from lollipops, candle
apples, hard candy, chewy candy and lots of chocolates. After I paid
we walked outside and noticed Kelso was already standing there
talking to a group of beautiful women. Maybe now I can go get some
lovin from this ladies so I walked up to them.
"Why hello you lovely ladies. My name is Fez, the goddess of
sexiness." I am standing right in between two blonde girls who are a
little taller then Jackie, and Kelso is standing by two brunettes and
a red head. They all stare at me like I'm so kind of weirdo, and I
know they want me. Who can resist me? I mean look at me, I am one hot
sexy goddess. Just then Hyde and Jackie walked up to us and the
beautiful blonde next to me seemed to be interested in Hyde. Damn
Hyde always taking up all the whores.
"Hi there, I'm Tiffany. What's you're name?"
I saw Hyde just smirk at her and raise his eyebrow and ready to
answer when Jackie hit him in the back of the head and then turned to
look at me and grabbed my arm.
"Come on Fez, let's go to that ride over there."
"Yay!!!! Let's go."
And then we started to walk away and I heard Kelso yell at Hyde.
"Burn!!!"
"Shut up Kelso."
"Ow, damn Hyde you don't have to hit me."
Two hours later We went to a few rides and had fun. Then we started
to talk about our hair.
"Yeah, Fez just leave in your conditioner to get so much softer hair
like mine, and shinier and more bouncy. You have to take care of your
hair, it's about 80% of your beauty you know. I mean can you imagine
me with this beautiful face and body but with nasty hair, splits ends
and dirty?"
"No, that would be awful. I try to get my hair to look softer and
more shinier. What do you recommend I should use?"
"You can try to use the conditioner I use it's called.." Then we
where interrupted by the others who bumped into us.
"Hey guys, where'd you go?"
This time Donna and Eric came with Kelso and Hyde. We all then
decided to go to another ride before we went to grab a bite to eat. I
was having a fun day so far, I got on a lot of rides with Jackie and
we even hung out and talked about our hair and clothes. After the
ride I started to feel a little sick.
"Guys I don't feel so good."
Donna and Jackie looked at me and backed up a little. Then Kelso
looked at me and spoke,
"What's wrong little buddy? You look kinda green. You're not gonna
puke are you? Because if you are do it to your left and don't get any
chunks on me. I'm sure Hyde wouldn't mind if you blew chunks his way.
Right Hyde?"
"Fez if you blow chunks on me I'm going to kick your ass."
"Uh, oh."
Then all of a sudden I started it blowing chunks getting it all over
Hyde and Eric. They will not be happy about this.