Kelso
All right so I'm in my room with Fez. We aren't talking because he wouldn't give me any of his candy and he was a bad friend and stole Annette out from under my nose. All my friends like my girlfriends. And they always take sloppy seconds. The girls go along with it because they know they can no longer have me and will settle for friends of mine so they can still see me. Why should I judge them? I mean who wouldn't want to be with me? I mean even a man dressed up like a girl wanted to date me. See I was right, I don't think Buddy was really gay cause if he was he would have been all over me like that hooker. I heard a pounding on the wall next to ours.
"Wow! Jackie and Hyde must really be going at it," Fez said amazed.
"No man, see Jackie's really sleeping cause she told me she was tired when I asked if we could hang out when we got back to the hotel. Hyde just wants to look like he is getting some," I told Fez. He just went back to eating his candy.
It was really late like three in the morning when we got back. Donna was mad at Eric but she let him stay in the room. I wish she didn't we had fun last time she kicked him out. I would have been willing to trade rooms with him again. Donna was changing and she left the door open a little bit. I picked up on that immediately she wanted me to look at her. So I did what she wanted me to do. But she yelled at me and called me a peeping Tom. I told her my name was Michael not Tom. And every one calls me stupid but she can't even remember my name! I even got to share a bed with her until she woke up and kicked me in the not so fun part. Other then that we had a good time.
This was really boring. Last night it was fun cause Annette was still here. She kept fighting her urges to hit on me because she gave it away to Fez. But she would give in when she didn't think Fez was looking. I don't blame her. I do the same thing when I'm hitting on a girl that has a boyfriend. Only Fez isn't really her boyfriend. I'm still mad at him. Donna and Eric are my only loyal friends. Both Fez and Hyde took my girls when I wasn't looking. I don't blame Jackie I mean she probably went kicking and screaming but only gave in cause she couldn't see me everyday after I left. I tried to talk to her but she pretends to be Zen but I don't believe her for a second. I can see it in her eyes. I know she wants me.
I laid down in bed and turned the lights off. I started to dream about Jackie.
When I woke up it was almost noon. Fez was still asleep. I took this chance to steal some candy and then went to take a shower. After I changed I went over to Jackie and Hyde's room. I was giving her a break from spending the whole night with him. But when I got in the room I realized that she had shared a bed with him last night. They were both ready to go down for some lunch and Jackie had even called Donna. We were going to meet so we could figure out what we were going to do. Jackie got mad at me for not waking Fez up, but why wake him up when I can steal his candy?
So finally at one everyone was ready to go eat. I was starving and didn't want to walk far. We went to a restaurant across the street and grabbed something to eat. Today we had to drive to Down town San Francisco and get a hotel room. We had planned to leave last night but we didn't. The cruiser was already packed. We had to take our food with us. It was my turn to drive but they wouldn't let me and gave the keys to Jackie. This is so not fair. I haven't gotten to drive at all this trip and I was bored.
"Why did you do that Eric?" I asked. "Cause you can't drive! You're a horrible driver," He said. "Hey I know California like the back of my hand! I had to drive to and from California on our last trip," I told them. Man I'm clever. "That was Southern California, moron," Donna told me. "We are in northern California," "What's the difference?" I asked I mean there really couldn't be a big difference. It's one state. "Why are we friends with them again?" Donna asked Eric.
Jackie started to freak out when we got close to down town. She said it was grungy and there was no way she was going to stay here. She also didn't think it was safe for her to drive down here so they made Hyde drive because they think he is brave. I'm just as brave and I wouldn't of stopped if I was driving this is not fair!
"Do you guys have directions?" Jackie asked the front seat which was Eric, Donna and Hyde.
"Aw crap," Eric let out. "I forgot them!" Donna looked at him and he freaked out because he thought she was going to yell at him again, which was possible. She liked to yell. But she didn't yell as much as Jackie, which is good. Why do girls like to yell?
"Its ok Eric, we can ask that girl over there," She said and pointed towards a girl standing near the road. Hyde drove up to her and stopped the car. Donna rolled down her window and started to talk to this girl. She was hot and I was checking her out when Jackie shrieked. A guy was crouched down by her door. She locked it. "Oh shit Donna we have to go," Hyde yelled and hit the gas. "What was he doing?" Fez asked. "Trying to steal hub caps," Hyde answered. "What?" Eric asked. "It's cool man he didn't get them," Hyde said still gunning it.
We finally found a hotel after an hour of listening to Eric and Donna fight. She was now blaming everything on Eric. Like normal. I wanted to get out of the car and get some candy because Fez can't share. We got to the hotel and the girls insisted that we all share a room because this place was very dirty and big and they didn't want anyone to get lost. There were only two beds and half a couch. This is going to suck because of course Eric and Donna get a bed and Jackie and Hyde get one. I so call the couch because I'm not sleeping on that dirty floor.
After we unpacked and hung out for a while we decided to go to a club. Eric and Hyde gave me their wallets because they knew if they brought them they would get stolen and they also where afraid that Donna and Jackie would want them to buy them stuff. They were afraid to give me their wallets but I decided I would probably loose them too so I left them at the hotel. We got into the club no problem. They didn't even card us cause I looked so old.
I started walking around looking for girls but Donna and Jackie made me stay close to them. Which I didn't mind because they are both good looking. Hyde went to get drinks and Donna didn't think Eric could beat any guys up that came to hit on her. Finally I was getting some attention, which I deserved. I was even in a better mood because Eric let me drive to the club. My day was finally going well. Some hot blondes came up and started to talk to me but Jackie yelled at them and told them to go away. I guess she wanted my attention all for her. If she dumped small and kosher I might date her. I stepped out on to the dance floor with her and Donna. Hyde was taking forever to get those drinks and I knew that if I said something she wouldn't pay attention to me anymore so I pretended like nothing was happening.
All the sudden I felt to people grab my arms. "What's going on?" Jackie shrieked. "Black out," Eric said not to far from me. I thought maybe I could be sneaky and get a little something something in since no one could see who did it. I put my hand on Jackie's chest but she was a little flatter then last time we did it. Then I tried Donna's, she was also flat. Man I need to start hanging out with girls that have a rack like Pam's. "Lets try to get to the car," Hyde said and Donna smacked my hand away.
We all walked to the door. I got to hold both Donna's and Jackie's hands. They were really scared we walked over to the cruiser. And Eric looked for his keys. "This is scary," Jackie said. "Yeah man some guy was trying to feel me up or something," Eric said as he looked for his keys. "I can't find my keys," "Yeah me too man, Kelso what did you do with them?" Hyde asked and Jackie started to look scary. "Um. I gave them to Eric," I told them. "Oh no you didn't!" Donna yelled. Then she pointed to the inside of the car. The keys were still in the ignition. "Shit!" Hyde yelled. Jackie hugged him she was really scared. All these old men walking by were ogling her and Donna. "What are we gonna do?" Fez asked scared holding on to Donna. "I guess I'm gonna have to break the window," Eric answered and started to slam his elbow into the car window. "Not like that Forman you won't get anything done like that," Hyde said releasing Jackie and went to slam on the window. "Excuse me sir but is that your car?" a Police officer asked. The girls looked even more scared. "I can take care of this since I'm gonna be a police officer," I told them. Hyde and Eric groaned. "You see the keys are locked in the car and we have to break into our car," I told the officer. "I need to see some identification," The officer barked. "Oh yeah hold on," Eric said going through his pants looking for his wallet then he gave me a nasty look. "What?" I asked him. "Kelso where's my wallet?" He asked. "At the hotel," I told him. Gosh what is his problem? "Kelso!" He yelled. "What man?" I asked him. "My ID's in the wallet!" He yelled. "Eric why did you give your ID to Kelso?" Donna asked. "I don't know! I think I must be getting dumber each day! What would Lu." He began but Jackie cut him off. "What's the big deal, just get two people to walk back to the hotel and get the wallets," Jackie said. "That would work Jackie if the key wasn't with the wallet," Eric told her. "Eric!" Donna yelled. "No ID?" The police officer asked. "No Mr. police officer," Eric asked. "Well then I'm gonna have to take you all down to the station," He said. "Yay! Do you have candy there?" Fez asked. The officer just stared at him and made us all get in to the cop car. We didn't all fit but the girls sat on Eric and Hyde's lap because the officer didn't want to wait for back up and only thought Hyde was harmful. He made Hyde sit in the back. Man that makes me laugh Jackie's boyfriend looks like a criminal. If she was still with me she wouldn't have to sit in the back behind the cage. She could sit upfront like me. "Nice going Kelso," Hyde yelled to me. And the police officer let me hit the cage with the nightstick and even let me turn on the sirens. Man being a police officer is going to be fun!
All right so I'm in my room with Fez. We aren't talking because he wouldn't give me any of his candy and he was a bad friend and stole Annette out from under my nose. All my friends like my girlfriends. And they always take sloppy seconds. The girls go along with it because they know they can no longer have me and will settle for friends of mine so they can still see me. Why should I judge them? I mean who wouldn't want to be with me? I mean even a man dressed up like a girl wanted to date me. See I was right, I don't think Buddy was really gay cause if he was he would have been all over me like that hooker. I heard a pounding on the wall next to ours.
"Wow! Jackie and Hyde must really be going at it," Fez said amazed.
"No man, see Jackie's really sleeping cause she told me she was tired when I asked if we could hang out when we got back to the hotel. Hyde just wants to look like he is getting some," I told Fez. He just went back to eating his candy.
It was really late like three in the morning when we got back. Donna was mad at Eric but she let him stay in the room. I wish she didn't we had fun last time she kicked him out. I would have been willing to trade rooms with him again. Donna was changing and she left the door open a little bit. I picked up on that immediately she wanted me to look at her. So I did what she wanted me to do. But she yelled at me and called me a peeping Tom. I told her my name was Michael not Tom. And every one calls me stupid but she can't even remember my name! I even got to share a bed with her until she woke up and kicked me in the not so fun part. Other then that we had a good time.
This was really boring. Last night it was fun cause Annette was still here. She kept fighting her urges to hit on me because she gave it away to Fez. But she would give in when she didn't think Fez was looking. I don't blame her. I do the same thing when I'm hitting on a girl that has a boyfriend. Only Fez isn't really her boyfriend. I'm still mad at him. Donna and Eric are my only loyal friends. Both Fez and Hyde took my girls when I wasn't looking. I don't blame Jackie I mean she probably went kicking and screaming but only gave in cause she couldn't see me everyday after I left. I tried to talk to her but she pretends to be Zen but I don't believe her for a second. I can see it in her eyes. I know she wants me.
I laid down in bed and turned the lights off. I started to dream about Jackie.
When I woke up it was almost noon. Fez was still asleep. I took this chance to steal some candy and then went to take a shower. After I changed I went over to Jackie and Hyde's room. I was giving her a break from spending the whole night with him. But when I got in the room I realized that she had shared a bed with him last night. They were both ready to go down for some lunch and Jackie had even called Donna. We were going to meet so we could figure out what we were going to do. Jackie got mad at me for not waking Fez up, but why wake him up when I can steal his candy?
So finally at one everyone was ready to go eat. I was starving and didn't want to walk far. We went to a restaurant across the street and grabbed something to eat. Today we had to drive to Down town San Francisco and get a hotel room. We had planned to leave last night but we didn't. The cruiser was already packed. We had to take our food with us. It was my turn to drive but they wouldn't let me and gave the keys to Jackie. This is so not fair. I haven't gotten to drive at all this trip and I was bored.
"Why did you do that Eric?" I asked. "Cause you can't drive! You're a horrible driver," He said. "Hey I know California like the back of my hand! I had to drive to and from California on our last trip," I told them. Man I'm clever. "That was Southern California, moron," Donna told me. "We are in northern California," "What's the difference?" I asked I mean there really couldn't be a big difference. It's one state. "Why are we friends with them again?" Donna asked Eric.
Jackie started to freak out when we got close to down town. She said it was grungy and there was no way she was going to stay here. She also didn't think it was safe for her to drive down here so they made Hyde drive because they think he is brave. I'm just as brave and I wouldn't of stopped if I was driving this is not fair!
"Do you guys have directions?" Jackie asked the front seat which was Eric, Donna and Hyde.
"Aw crap," Eric let out. "I forgot them!" Donna looked at him and he freaked out because he thought she was going to yell at him again, which was possible. She liked to yell. But she didn't yell as much as Jackie, which is good. Why do girls like to yell?
"Its ok Eric, we can ask that girl over there," She said and pointed towards a girl standing near the road. Hyde drove up to her and stopped the car. Donna rolled down her window and started to talk to this girl. She was hot and I was checking her out when Jackie shrieked. A guy was crouched down by her door. She locked it. "Oh shit Donna we have to go," Hyde yelled and hit the gas. "What was he doing?" Fez asked. "Trying to steal hub caps," Hyde answered. "What?" Eric asked. "It's cool man he didn't get them," Hyde said still gunning it.
We finally found a hotel after an hour of listening to Eric and Donna fight. She was now blaming everything on Eric. Like normal. I wanted to get out of the car and get some candy because Fez can't share. We got to the hotel and the girls insisted that we all share a room because this place was very dirty and big and they didn't want anyone to get lost. There were only two beds and half a couch. This is going to suck because of course Eric and Donna get a bed and Jackie and Hyde get one. I so call the couch because I'm not sleeping on that dirty floor.
After we unpacked and hung out for a while we decided to go to a club. Eric and Hyde gave me their wallets because they knew if they brought them they would get stolen and they also where afraid that Donna and Jackie would want them to buy them stuff. They were afraid to give me their wallets but I decided I would probably loose them too so I left them at the hotel. We got into the club no problem. They didn't even card us cause I looked so old.
I started walking around looking for girls but Donna and Jackie made me stay close to them. Which I didn't mind because they are both good looking. Hyde went to get drinks and Donna didn't think Eric could beat any guys up that came to hit on her. Finally I was getting some attention, which I deserved. I was even in a better mood because Eric let me drive to the club. My day was finally going well. Some hot blondes came up and started to talk to me but Jackie yelled at them and told them to go away. I guess she wanted my attention all for her. If she dumped small and kosher I might date her. I stepped out on to the dance floor with her and Donna. Hyde was taking forever to get those drinks and I knew that if I said something she wouldn't pay attention to me anymore so I pretended like nothing was happening.
All the sudden I felt to people grab my arms. "What's going on?" Jackie shrieked. "Black out," Eric said not to far from me. I thought maybe I could be sneaky and get a little something something in since no one could see who did it. I put my hand on Jackie's chest but she was a little flatter then last time we did it. Then I tried Donna's, she was also flat. Man I need to start hanging out with girls that have a rack like Pam's. "Lets try to get to the car," Hyde said and Donna smacked my hand away.
We all walked to the door. I got to hold both Donna's and Jackie's hands. They were really scared we walked over to the cruiser. And Eric looked for his keys. "This is scary," Jackie said. "Yeah man some guy was trying to feel me up or something," Eric said as he looked for his keys. "I can't find my keys," "Yeah me too man, Kelso what did you do with them?" Hyde asked and Jackie started to look scary. "Um. I gave them to Eric," I told them. "Oh no you didn't!" Donna yelled. Then she pointed to the inside of the car. The keys were still in the ignition. "Shit!" Hyde yelled. Jackie hugged him she was really scared. All these old men walking by were ogling her and Donna. "What are we gonna do?" Fez asked scared holding on to Donna. "I guess I'm gonna have to break the window," Eric answered and started to slam his elbow into the car window. "Not like that Forman you won't get anything done like that," Hyde said releasing Jackie and went to slam on the window. "Excuse me sir but is that your car?" a Police officer asked. The girls looked even more scared. "I can take care of this since I'm gonna be a police officer," I told them. Hyde and Eric groaned. "You see the keys are locked in the car and we have to break into our car," I told the officer. "I need to see some identification," The officer barked. "Oh yeah hold on," Eric said going through his pants looking for his wallet then he gave me a nasty look. "What?" I asked him. "Kelso where's my wallet?" He asked. "At the hotel," I told him. Gosh what is his problem? "Kelso!" He yelled. "What man?" I asked him. "My ID's in the wallet!" He yelled. "Eric why did you give your ID to Kelso?" Donna asked. "I don't know! I think I must be getting dumber each day! What would Lu." He began but Jackie cut him off. "What's the big deal, just get two people to walk back to the hotel and get the wallets," Jackie said. "That would work Jackie if the key wasn't with the wallet," Eric told her. "Eric!" Donna yelled. "No ID?" The police officer asked. "No Mr. police officer," Eric asked. "Well then I'm gonna have to take you all down to the station," He said. "Yay! Do you have candy there?" Fez asked. The officer just stared at him and made us all get in to the cop car. We didn't all fit but the girls sat on Eric and Hyde's lap because the officer didn't want to wait for back up and only thought Hyde was harmful. He made Hyde sit in the back. Man that makes me laugh Jackie's boyfriend looks like a criminal. If she was still with me she wouldn't have to sit in the back behind the cage. She could sit upfront like me. "Nice going Kelso," Hyde yelled to me. And the police officer let me hit the cage with the nightstick and even let me turn on the sirens. Man being a police officer is going to be fun!