Disclaimer: Ok, lookie here people. WE. DO. NOT. OWN. POTC. AND IF YOU'RE
TOO STUPID TO HAVE ALREADY KNOWN THAT WELL AARRRGG!!!
YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!! WE FINALLY HIT 100 REVIEWS!!!! YAAAY!!! Luv n kisses to all our WONDERFUL reviewers (and many cybercookies too).
Oh yes, and Thankies to Ginamaria for the chapter title! Heh, your insanity is handy.
Thankies to y'all SO much for reviewing!!
R&R please!
~Sarah POV~
As Elizabeth and Will went down to the hold to bandage Elizabitch up, thoughts raced through my mind. I could NOT leave Jack there all by his lonesome! In a moment of reckless abandon, I threw myself into one of the rowboats and lowered it quickly into the water.
"SARAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING??" Laurel shouted from the deck. Several of our crew had also come running.
"I HAVE TO SAVE JACK!!" I screamed. And with that, I started rowing faster than probably anyone every has. I reached the cave, jumped out the boat, and ran smack into two pirates.
"Arrr, not ANOTHER one!" one of the pirates said.
"Aye, ANOTHER bloody one," the other pirate responded.
They dragged me over to where all the pirates were standing circled around my poor Jack, who was leaning on an oar. They shoved me at Jack, who looked rather surprised.
"Sarah! What are you doing here?" he whispered.
"I couldn't leave you here, Jackie," I murmured. He smiled and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me close. I grinned. Just then, that horrible conversation piece of a captain, Barbossa, came up. Completely ignoring me, he said to Jack, "How the blazes did you get off that island?"
"When you marooned me on that godforsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate. I'm Captain Jack Sparrow."
"Ah, well, I won't be makin' that mistake again. Gents, you'll all remember Captain Jack Sparrow, and the lady. Kill them."
"MEEP!" I shrieked, and buried my head in Jack's shoulder.
~~~MEANWHILE, ONBOARD THE INTERCEPTOR~~~
~Laurel POV~ I couldn't believe Sarah had just LEFT me. ALL ALONE. Well, I had Will, of course, but he had disappeared below deck with Elizabeth.
Below deck with Elizabitch.
"EEK!" I screeched and made a beeline for the hold. I barged into the room they were sitting in. Will was VERY close to Elizabeth and had his hand on her face. Not the least bit embarrassed, I yelled "NOOOO!!!" and lunged for Will, who looked rather startled.
Elizabitch flushed red, then, as if attempting to pretend nothing had happened, took the medallion off and handed it to Will.
"It's yours," she said.
"HAH! I KNEW IT!! THEIF!!" I shouted triumphantly. Elizabeth growled in my direction.
"Don't you think you ought to go check on the crew or something, Laurel?" Elizabeth asked in a sickly sweet voice.
"No." I replied in the same tone.
Will tried his best not to laugh, then turned solemn again and looked at the medallion. "I thought I'd lost it on the day they rescued me. It was a gift from my father, he sent it to me. Why did you take it?"
"BECAUSE she's a #%^@ kleptomaniac, THAT'S why!" I said. They ignored me, as always.
"Because I was afraid you were a pirate. That would've been awful," Elizabeth said, sniveling.
"It wasn't your blood they needed.it was my father's blood.my blood.the blood of a pirate," Will said quietly.
"I'm so sorry Will, please forgive me," Elizabeth begged.
"WHY would he forgive YOU, you monkey mustard faced buffoon?" (said by yours truly, of course)
Will (to my delight) slammed the medallion very hard on the table and Elizabitch left. MUAHAHA. That left me ALL alone with none other than the extremely hot, sexy, cute, handsome, lickable, sweet, drool-worthy, caring, lovable, dear, precious Will.
"She was wrong to steal it, Will," I said, "but she has a big arse and I think that's where she keeps her silly brain . . ."
~~~MEANWHILE, IN THE PIRATES CAVE~~~
~Sarah POV~
As Barbossa walked away and all the men drew their pistols, Jack suddenly spoke up, "The girls blood didn't work, did it?" Ah, yes, my sweet dear brave Jackie-poo would save us.
"Hold your fire!" Barbossa commanded. The pirates looked very, very disappointed. "You know who's blood we need?"
"I know who's blood ye need."
Teehee.
So, Barbossa decided that we would be very helpful and decided to take us on board the Black Pearl. The pirates actually let us walk on our own (though I was still clinging to Jack's arm, and he didn't seem to mind) which was nice. We boarded, and Barbossa, Jack, and myself went into Barbossa private dining cabin and then we all set sail. I sat staring at the monkey. The very, very ka-UTE monkey, while Jack and Barbossa talked. When I started drooling over the monkey, Barbossa growled and snatched it away from me.
"WAAAH!" I sniveled, and plopped down on a chair next to Jack. And decided that I would listen to their conversation.
"So you expect to leave me standing on some beach with none but a name and your word it's the one I need and watch you sail away on my ship?" Barbossa asked, chuckling.
"Well, DUH." I said. They ignored me, AGAIN. By golly gee whiz, I was TIRED of being ignored.
"No. I expect to leave you standing on some beach with absolutely no name at all, watching me sail away on MY ship and then I'll shout the name back to you, muahaha! Savvy?"
Barbossa said, "But that still leaves us with the problem of me standing on some beach with naught but a name and your word it's the one I need."
"Well, you know, you really are a bloody crouton trout faced idjiot," I muttered. Jack smiled and handed me an apple. Yummay.
"Of the two of us, I am the only one who hasn't committed mutiny, therefore my word is the one we'll be trusting. Even though you really shouldn't trust me anyway because I'm dishonest. Although, I suppose I should be thanking you because in fact, if you hadn't betrayed me and left me to die on some stupid island with lots and lots of rum, I would have an equal share in that curse same as you, and in the moonlight I'd be this icky disgustable skeleton thingy with really bad breath. Instead I've achieved a state of perpetual drunkenness, thanks to you. Funny ol' world, innit?"
Barbossa rolled his eyes, and then Bo'sun {A/N: for those of you who don't know, Bo'sun is that pirate with beads imbedded into his skin . . . ew . . .} walked in and said, "Yo, Cap, we're comin' up on the Interceptor."
So Barbossa went topside, and Jack followed Barbossa, and I (naturally) followed Jack. Barbossa was looked through a spyglass at the Interceptor, when Jack swooped down in front of him and said, "I'm having bit of a thought here, Barbossa. What say we run up a flag of truce? I scurry over to the Interceptor and I negotiate the return of your medallion, aye? What say you to that?"
"Now you see, Jack, that's exactly the attitude that lost you the Pearl. People are easy to search when they're dead. Lock them in the brig," Barbossa said, pointing to Jack and me.
Gulp.
"Erm, alright then but can I finish my apple?" Jack asked hopefully.
"No."
"Pish."
"Haul on the main brace. Make ready the guns. And run out the sweeps," Barbossa called to his men as we were led away. Bo'sun dragged us down into the brig and locked us in a cell. There was about an inch of water on the floor. As Bo'sun walked away, I said, "Apparently there's a leak." Jack chuckled, then sighed.
"Don't worry Jack, we'll get out of here. After all, you ARE Captain Jack Sparrow," I said.
"Aye, that I am, love," Jack replied, grinning.
~Laurel POV~
Will and I went up on deck only to find that the crew was running around. I went over to Anamaria, who was steering, and asked, "What's happening?"
"The bloody Black Pearl is gaining on us," Anamaria said.
"This is the fastest ship in the Caribbean!" Elizabitch said, popping out of no where.
I rolled my eyes. "Elizabeth, dear, this obviously ISN'T the fastest ship in the Caribbean if THAT ship is gaining on us! DUH!!"
"We're shallow in the draft, right?" Elizabeth said.
"Say wha-?" Will and I said simultaneously. No one answered us.
"Aye," Anamaria said.
"Well, can't we lose them among those . . . things?" Elizabitch said, gesturing.
"Shoals," I offered helpfully.
"We don't have to outrun 'em long, just long enough," Gibbs said.
"Lighten the ship, stern to stern!" Anamaria commanded.
"Throw all the crap that we don't need off the boat!" I yelled to the men. They gave me a puzzled look, but immediately complied.
We watched as the Black Pearl put out its oars. Uh-oh, this was bad . . . they were gaining, and fast.
"It was a good plan, up till now," Anamaria said to Elizabitch.
"Gibbs! We have to make a stand! We must fight! Load the guns!" Will shouted.
"With what?" Anamaria asked.
"Well if y'all hadn't thrown the cannonballs off . . ." I muttered.
"Anything, everything! Anything we have left," Will said.
"Load the guns!" Gibbs shouted.
"Yes! With, forks, knives, spoons, and that BLOODY PARROT!!" I yelled.
"She'll rake us without ever presenting a target," Gibbs said nervously a minute or two later.
"Lower the anchor on the right side. On the starboard side!" Elizabitch said. Damn, I hated her, but she DID have a good idea.
"It certainly presents the element of surprise," Will said.
"You're daft lady! You both are!" Anamaria insisted. No shit . . . but daft is good sometimes.
"Daft like Jack! Lower the starboard anchor! Do it ye dogs or it's you we'll load into the cannons!" Gibbs bellowed.
"Can't we load them into the cannons ANYWAY?" I whined. Naturally, I was ignored.
I grabbed onto the side of the deck as the boat swung around. The Black Pearl saw what was coming and retracted their starboard oars. Soon both ships were aligned side to side.
"FIRE!!" Barbossa and Elizabeth shouted at the same time. The ships immediately started firing at one another. Spoons vs. Cannonballs. Gee, I wonder who'll win?
~Sarah POV~
As Jack and I sat in the cell, a hole was blown in the hull by several pieces of silverware.
"STOP BLOWIN' HOLES IN MY SHIP!" Jack shouted out the hole while I thought to myself, "Wtf?"
It was then that Jack noticed a canteen had been shot in as well. He opened in up only to find to his disappointment that it was empty. Suddenly, I noticed that the shot from the cannon had destroyed the lock on the door.
"Jack! Look!" I said, pointed to the door. We gleefully went out and up onto the deck. A pirate swung from a rope onto the deck and collapsed. Jack took the rope, slid his arm across my waist, and said to the unconscious pirate, "Thanks very much." And with that, we swung across to the Interceptor. As soon as I was on deck, I was immediately knocked down when something, or rather, someone threw herself at me.
"LAUREL!!!" I yelled.
"SARAH! YOU'RE OK!" She said blissfully. We hugged happily and then went back to fending off pirates. Suddenly, Elizabeth flew past us yelling "Will!" and peering down into the grate. Laurel and I ran over to the grate with her.
"Laurel! Elizabeth! Sarah!" We tried to get the grate open, but it was to no avail, and we were soon dragged away by pirates.
Next thing I knew, we were all tied together around the mast on the Black Pearl.
"If any of you so much as THINK the word parley, I'll have your guts for garters," one of the pirates growled. Suddenly the Interceptor, which by this point was about twenty yards away, blew up. All at once, Elizabeth, Laurel, and I broke free of the rope and ran over the side of the ship and yelled "WILL!" I ignored the hurt look Jack was giving me.
"You've got to stop it! Stop it!" Elizabitch screeched at Barbossa.
"Welcome back, Missies. You took advantage of our hospitality last time. All fair's now that you return the favor." Barbossa said, chuckling, and shoved us towards the crew. YUCKIE!!! "NOOO!" all three of just shrieked.
Suddenly, Will appeared on deck. "Barbossa!" He called, and grabbed up Jack's pistol from where it lay, pointed it at Barbie, and said, pointing to Elizabeth, Laurel, and I, "They go free!"
"What's in your head, boy?" Barbie said.
"The three of them go free!"
"You've only got one shot and we can't die," Barbie said smugly.
"Tomato face," I muttered.
Jack looked at Will as said pleadingly, "don't do anything stupid!"
"You can't . . . I can," Will said, pointing the pistol at himself.
"NOOOOO!" Laurel, Elizabitch, and I yelled at the same time and struggled to get away from the pirates that were holding us.
"Like that," Jack muttered.
"Who ARE you?" Barbie asked.
"No one. He's no one. A distant cousin of my aunt's sister's nephew's daughter twice removed. Lovely singing voice, though. Eunuch," Jack said quickly.
"HE! IS NOT! A EUNUCH!" Laurel screamed while Elizabeth and I growled.
"My name is Will Turner. My father was Bootstrap Bill Turner. His blood runs in my veins. On my word do as I say or I'll pull this trigger and be lost forever to Davy Jones' Locker."
"Name your terms, Mr. Turner," Barbie said.
"Elizabeth, Laurel, and Sarah go free!"
"Yes, we know that one. Anything else?"
Jack pointed hopefully at himself. "And the crew! The crew are not to be harmed," Will added. Jack looked hurt. AWWW, POOR JACK!!
"Agreed," Barbie said.
And THEN, next thing I knew, Laurel, Elizabeth, and I were being forced to walk the plank. ARRG.
"Barbi-I mean, Barbossa, you lying bastard, you swore they'd go free!"
"Hey, why are you making my poor sweet Sarah walk the plank?" Jack asked, and was ignored.
"Don't dare impugn me honor, boy. I'm smelly enough as it is. I agreed she'd go free it was you who failed to specify when or where, so I got to choose, I THIS IS WHAT I CHOSE SO NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH! Though does seem a shame to lose something so fine, don't it lads?"
"Aye!" The pirates said.
"So I'll be having my purdy dress back before you go. And I think I'll be having you two's dresses as well," Barbie said, addressing the three of us.
"Why you bloody banana brained tissue headed salad face . . ." I growled. Several pirates pointed their pistols at us.
"FINE!" I snapped and took off my dress and threw it at him, Laurel and Elizabitch following suit. The pirates whistled in delight at the sight of us in our shifts. Purple faced rubbing alcohol sniffers.
"Ooh, it's still warm," Barbossa said, holding Elizabeth's dress up to his cheek.
"Off you go now!" A pirate said. We gulped and gazed down at the water.
"Too long!" Bo'sun said, and shook the plank, causing Elizabitch and Laurel to fall in. I managed to keep my balance, and was yanked back on deck by Jack, but only to have swords pointed at our throats. Jack gulped and said, "I'd really rather hoped we were past all this."
"Jack. Jack! Did ya not notice? That bit of island is the same one that we made you Governor of on our last little trip," Barbie said. I growled. Then we were both shoved off the ship and into the water, after Jack was given his pistol. We both managed to swim to shore, where Laurel and Elizabitch were waiting. "That's the second time I've had to watch that man sail away with my ship," Jack said mournfully, then started walking towards the center of the island. The three of us followed him.
"But you were marooned on this island before, weren't you? So we can escape in the same way you did then," Elizabitch protested.
"To what point and purpose, young missy? The Black Pearl is gone and unless the three you have a rudder and a lot of sails hidden in that bodices, unlikely, young Mr. Turner will be dead long before you can reach him," Jack said.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAH!! 'S NOT FAIR!!" Laurel and Elizabitch both sobbed, flinging themselves at each other. I gaped.
"But you're Captain Jack Sparrow. You vanished from under the eyes of seven agents of the East India Company. You sacked Nassau Port without even firing a shot. Are you the pirate I've read about or not? How did you escape last time?" Elizabitch asked after she was done sniveling.
"Last time.I was here a grand total of three days, alright? Last time [opens a secret cellar door] .the rumrunners used this island as a cache. Came by and I was able to barter a passage off. From the looks of things, they've long been out of business. Probably have your bloody ugly stupid dorky geeky jack ass friend Norrington to thank for that," Jack replied.
"So that's it then? That's the secret grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow ? You spent three days lying on a beach, drinking rum?!" Elizabeth asked, as if it were something to be ashamed of.
"REALLY? That's what you did? AWESOME!!!" I said happily, "I LOVE RUM!"
Jack grinned at me. "Welcome to the Caribbean, love," he said, and handed me a bottle of rum.
~Later that night~
"We're devils and black sheep and really bad eggs. Drink up me 'earties yo ho! Yo ho yo ho a pirate's life for me," Jack, Laurel, and I sang, dancing around the bonfire, obviously very, very drunk, while Elizabitch sat on the beach some distance away, rolling her eyes at us.
"I love this song! Really bad eggs! Woo. When I get the Pearl back, I'm gonna teach it to the whole crew and we'll sing it all the time!" Jack said, as he and I fell onto the sand. He put his arm around my shoulders and I said, "Yes, and you'll be positively the most fearsome pirate in the Spanish Main."
"Not just the Spanish Main, love, the entire ocean, the entire wo'ld. Wherever we want to go, that's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails that's what a ship needs but what a ship is.what the Black Pearl really is.is freedom," Jack said.
"It must really terrible for you to be trapped on this Island, Jack," Elizabeth said, strolling up and plucking a half empty bottle of rum off the ground.
"Oh yes, but the company is much better, and the scenery has certainly improved," he said, holding me close. I gazed into his gorgeous, beautiful, black-lined eyes and just . . . drooled. Then I realized that his face was awfully close to mine . . . by golly, HE WAS GONNA KISS ME!! AAH!!! And then he did. And we did. For a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very long time. Then Elizabeth gave a very loud "AHEM." And we stopped. But continued to stare at each other.
It was then that I realized that I was in love.
~
Coming up next time: THE RUM SCENE!!!! YEE!!
So0o0o0o0o what do y'all think? I bet that many of you are feeling jealous of Sarah right now . . . heh heh heh. But do review please!!
YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!! WE FINALLY HIT 100 REVIEWS!!!! YAAAY!!! Luv n kisses to all our WONDERFUL reviewers (and many cybercookies too).
Oh yes, and Thankies to Ginamaria for the chapter title! Heh, your insanity is handy.
Thankies to y'all SO much for reviewing!!
R&R please!
~Sarah POV~
As Elizabeth and Will went down to the hold to bandage Elizabitch up, thoughts raced through my mind. I could NOT leave Jack there all by his lonesome! In a moment of reckless abandon, I threw myself into one of the rowboats and lowered it quickly into the water.
"SARAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING??" Laurel shouted from the deck. Several of our crew had also come running.
"I HAVE TO SAVE JACK!!" I screamed. And with that, I started rowing faster than probably anyone every has. I reached the cave, jumped out the boat, and ran smack into two pirates.
"Arrr, not ANOTHER one!" one of the pirates said.
"Aye, ANOTHER bloody one," the other pirate responded.
They dragged me over to where all the pirates were standing circled around my poor Jack, who was leaning on an oar. They shoved me at Jack, who looked rather surprised.
"Sarah! What are you doing here?" he whispered.
"I couldn't leave you here, Jackie," I murmured. He smiled and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me close. I grinned. Just then, that horrible conversation piece of a captain, Barbossa, came up. Completely ignoring me, he said to Jack, "How the blazes did you get off that island?"
"When you marooned me on that godforsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate. I'm Captain Jack Sparrow."
"Ah, well, I won't be makin' that mistake again. Gents, you'll all remember Captain Jack Sparrow, and the lady. Kill them."
"MEEP!" I shrieked, and buried my head in Jack's shoulder.
~~~MEANWHILE, ONBOARD THE INTERCEPTOR~~~
~Laurel POV~ I couldn't believe Sarah had just LEFT me. ALL ALONE. Well, I had Will, of course, but he had disappeared below deck with Elizabeth.
Below deck with Elizabitch.
"EEK!" I screeched and made a beeline for the hold. I barged into the room they were sitting in. Will was VERY close to Elizabeth and had his hand on her face. Not the least bit embarrassed, I yelled "NOOOO!!!" and lunged for Will, who looked rather startled.
Elizabitch flushed red, then, as if attempting to pretend nothing had happened, took the medallion off and handed it to Will.
"It's yours," she said.
"HAH! I KNEW IT!! THEIF!!" I shouted triumphantly. Elizabeth growled in my direction.
"Don't you think you ought to go check on the crew or something, Laurel?" Elizabeth asked in a sickly sweet voice.
"No." I replied in the same tone.
Will tried his best not to laugh, then turned solemn again and looked at the medallion. "I thought I'd lost it on the day they rescued me. It was a gift from my father, he sent it to me. Why did you take it?"
"BECAUSE she's a #%^@ kleptomaniac, THAT'S why!" I said. They ignored me, as always.
"Because I was afraid you were a pirate. That would've been awful," Elizabeth said, sniveling.
"It wasn't your blood they needed.it was my father's blood.my blood.the blood of a pirate," Will said quietly.
"I'm so sorry Will, please forgive me," Elizabeth begged.
"WHY would he forgive YOU, you monkey mustard faced buffoon?" (said by yours truly, of course)
Will (to my delight) slammed the medallion very hard on the table and Elizabitch left. MUAHAHA. That left me ALL alone with none other than the extremely hot, sexy, cute, handsome, lickable, sweet, drool-worthy, caring, lovable, dear, precious Will.
"She was wrong to steal it, Will," I said, "but she has a big arse and I think that's where she keeps her silly brain . . ."
~~~MEANWHILE, IN THE PIRATES CAVE~~~
~Sarah POV~
As Barbossa walked away and all the men drew their pistols, Jack suddenly spoke up, "The girls blood didn't work, did it?" Ah, yes, my sweet dear brave Jackie-poo would save us.
"Hold your fire!" Barbossa commanded. The pirates looked very, very disappointed. "You know who's blood we need?"
"I know who's blood ye need."
Teehee.
So, Barbossa decided that we would be very helpful and decided to take us on board the Black Pearl. The pirates actually let us walk on our own (though I was still clinging to Jack's arm, and he didn't seem to mind) which was nice. We boarded, and Barbossa, Jack, and myself went into Barbossa private dining cabin and then we all set sail. I sat staring at the monkey. The very, very ka-UTE monkey, while Jack and Barbossa talked. When I started drooling over the monkey, Barbossa growled and snatched it away from me.
"WAAAH!" I sniveled, and plopped down on a chair next to Jack. And decided that I would listen to their conversation.
"So you expect to leave me standing on some beach with none but a name and your word it's the one I need and watch you sail away on my ship?" Barbossa asked, chuckling.
"Well, DUH." I said. They ignored me, AGAIN. By golly gee whiz, I was TIRED of being ignored.
"No. I expect to leave you standing on some beach with absolutely no name at all, watching me sail away on MY ship and then I'll shout the name back to you, muahaha! Savvy?"
Barbossa said, "But that still leaves us with the problem of me standing on some beach with naught but a name and your word it's the one I need."
"Well, you know, you really are a bloody crouton trout faced idjiot," I muttered. Jack smiled and handed me an apple. Yummay.
"Of the two of us, I am the only one who hasn't committed mutiny, therefore my word is the one we'll be trusting. Even though you really shouldn't trust me anyway because I'm dishonest. Although, I suppose I should be thanking you because in fact, if you hadn't betrayed me and left me to die on some stupid island with lots and lots of rum, I would have an equal share in that curse same as you, and in the moonlight I'd be this icky disgustable skeleton thingy with really bad breath. Instead I've achieved a state of perpetual drunkenness, thanks to you. Funny ol' world, innit?"
Barbossa rolled his eyes, and then Bo'sun {A/N: for those of you who don't know, Bo'sun is that pirate with beads imbedded into his skin . . . ew . . .} walked in and said, "Yo, Cap, we're comin' up on the Interceptor."
So Barbossa went topside, and Jack followed Barbossa, and I (naturally) followed Jack. Barbossa was looked through a spyglass at the Interceptor, when Jack swooped down in front of him and said, "I'm having bit of a thought here, Barbossa. What say we run up a flag of truce? I scurry over to the Interceptor and I negotiate the return of your medallion, aye? What say you to that?"
"Now you see, Jack, that's exactly the attitude that lost you the Pearl. People are easy to search when they're dead. Lock them in the brig," Barbossa said, pointing to Jack and me.
Gulp.
"Erm, alright then but can I finish my apple?" Jack asked hopefully.
"No."
"Pish."
"Haul on the main brace. Make ready the guns. And run out the sweeps," Barbossa called to his men as we were led away. Bo'sun dragged us down into the brig and locked us in a cell. There was about an inch of water on the floor. As Bo'sun walked away, I said, "Apparently there's a leak." Jack chuckled, then sighed.
"Don't worry Jack, we'll get out of here. After all, you ARE Captain Jack Sparrow," I said.
"Aye, that I am, love," Jack replied, grinning.
~Laurel POV~
Will and I went up on deck only to find that the crew was running around. I went over to Anamaria, who was steering, and asked, "What's happening?"
"The bloody Black Pearl is gaining on us," Anamaria said.
"This is the fastest ship in the Caribbean!" Elizabitch said, popping out of no where.
I rolled my eyes. "Elizabeth, dear, this obviously ISN'T the fastest ship in the Caribbean if THAT ship is gaining on us! DUH!!"
"We're shallow in the draft, right?" Elizabeth said.
"Say wha-?" Will and I said simultaneously. No one answered us.
"Aye," Anamaria said.
"Well, can't we lose them among those . . . things?" Elizabitch said, gesturing.
"Shoals," I offered helpfully.
"We don't have to outrun 'em long, just long enough," Gibbs said.
"Lighten the ship, stern to stern!" Anamaria commanded.
"Throw all the crap that we don't need off the boat!" I yelled to the men. They gave me a puzzled look, but immediately complied.
We watched as the Black Pearl put out its oars. Uh-oh, this was bad . . . they were gaining, and fast.
"It was a good plan, up till now," Anamaria said to Elizabitch.
"Gibbs! We have to make a stand! We must fight! Load the guns!" Will shouted.
"With what?" Anamaria asked.
"Well if y'all hadn't thrown the cannonballs off . . ." I muttered.
"Anything, everything! Anything we have left," Will said.
"Load the guns!" Gibbs shouted.
"Yes! With, forks, knives, spoons, and that BLOODY PARROT!!" I yelled.
"She'll rake us without ever presenting a target," Gibbs said nervously a minute or two later.
"Lower the anchor on the right side. On the starboard side!" Elizabitch said. Damn, I hated her, but she DID have a good idea.
"It certainly presents the element of surprise," Will said.
"You're daft lady! You both are!" Anamaria insisted. No shit . . . but daft is good sometimes.
"Daft like Jack! Lower the starboard anchor! Do it ye dogs or it's you we'll load into the cannons!" Gibbs bellowed.
"Can't we load them into the cannons ANYWAY?" I whined. Naturally, I was ignored.
I grabbed onto the side of the deck as the boat swung around. The Black Pearl saw what was coming and retracted their starboard oars. Soon both ships were aligned side to side.
"FIRE!!" Barbossa and Elizabeth shouted at the same time. The ships immediately started firing at one another. Spoons vs. Cannonballs. Gee, I wonder who'll win?
~Sarah POV~
As Jack and I sat in the cell, a hole was blown in the hull by several pieces of silverware.
"STOP BLOWIN' HOLES IN MY SHIP!" Jack shouted out the hole while I thought to myself, "Wtf?"
It was then that Jack noticed a canteen had been shot in as well. He opened in up only to find to his disappointment that it was empty. Suddenly, I noticed that the shot from the cannon had destroyed the lock on the door.
"Jack! Look!" I said, pointed to the door. We gleefully went out and up onto the deck. A pirate swung from a rope onto the deck and collapsed. Jack took the rope, slid his arm across my waist, and said to the unconscious pirate, "Thanks very much." And with that, we swung across to the Interceptor. As soon as I was on deck, I was immediately knocked down when something, or rather, someone threw herself at me.
"LAUREL!!!" I yelled.
"SARAH! YOU'RE OK!" She said blissfully. We hugged happily and then went back to fending off pirates. Suddenly, Elizabeth flew past us yelling "Will!" and peering down into the grate. Laurel and I ran over to the grate with her.
"Laurel! Elizabeth! Sarah!" We tried to get the grate open, but it was to no avail, and we were soon dragged away by pirates.
Next thing I knew, we were all tied together around the mast on the Black Pearl.
"If any of you so much as THINK the word parley, I'll have your guts for garters," one of the pirates growled. Suddenly the Interceptor, which by this point was about twenty yards away, blew up. All at once, Elizabeth, Laurel, and I broke free of the rope and ran over the side of the ship and yelled "WILL!" I ignored the hurt look Jack was giving me.
"You've got to stop it! Stop it!" Elizabitch screeched at Barbossa.
"Welcome back, Missies. You took advantage of our hospitality last time. All fair's now that you return the favor." Barbossa said, chuckling, and shoved us towards the crew. YUCKIE!!! "NOOO!" all three of just shrieked.
Suddenly, Will appeared on deck. "Barbossa!" He called, and grabbed up Jack's pistol from where it lay, pointed it at Barbie, and said, pointing to Elizabeth, Laurel, and I, "They go free!"
"What's in your head, boy?" Barbie said.
"The three of them go free!"
"You've only got one shot and we can't die," Barbie said smugly.
"Tomato face," I muttered.
Jack looked at Will as said pleadingly, "don't do anything stupid!"
"You can't . . . I can," Will said, pointing the pistol at himself.
"NOOOOO!" Laurel, Elizabitch, and I yelled at the same time and struggled to get away from the pirates that were holding us.
"Like that," Jack muttered.
"Who ARE you?" Barbie asked.
"No one. He's no one. A distant cousin of my aunt's sister's nephew's daughter twice removed. Lovely singing voice, though. Eunuch," Jack said quickly.
"HE! IS NOT! A EUNUCH!" Laurel screamed while Elizabeth and I growled.
"My name is Will Turner. My father was Bootstrap Bill Turner. His blood runs in my veins. On my word do as I say or I'll pull this trigger and be lost forever to Davy Jones' Locker."
"Name your terms, Mr. Turner," Barbie said.
"Elizabeth, Laurel, and Sarah go free!"
"Yes, we know that one. Anything else?"
Jack pointed hopefully at himself. "And the crew! The crew are not to be harmed," Will added. Jack looked hurt. AWWW, POOR JACK!!
"Agreed," Barbie said.
And THEN, next thing I knew, Laurel, Elizabeth, and I were being forced to walk the plank. ARRG.
"Barbi-I mean, Barbossa, you lying bastard, you swore they'd go free!"
"Hey, why are you making my poor sweet Sarah walk the plank?" Jack asked, and was ignored.
"Don't dare impugn me honor, boy. I'm smelly enough as it is. I agreed she'd go free it was you who failed to specify when or where, so I got to choose, I THIS IS WHAT I CHOSE SO NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH! Though does seem a shame to lose something so fine, don't it lads?"
"Aye!" The pirates said.
"So I'll be having my purdy dress back before you go. And I think I'll be having you two's dresses as well," Barbie said, addressing the three of us.
"Why you bloody banana brained tissue headed salad face . . ." I growled. Several pirates pointed their pistols at us.
"FINE!" I snapped and took off my dress and threw it at him, Laurel and Elizabitch following suit. The pirates whistled in delight at the sight of us in our shifts. Purple faced rubbing alcohol sniffers.
"Ooh, it's still warm," Barbossa said, holding Elizabeth's dress up to his cheek.
"Off you go now!" A pirate said. We gulped and gazed down at the water.
"Too long!" Bo'sun said, and shook the plank, causing Elizabitch and Laurel to fall in. I managed to keep my balance, and was yanked back on deck by Jack, but only to have swords pointed at our throats. Jack gulped and said, "I'd really rather hoped we were past all this."
"Jack. Jack! Did ya not notice? That bit of island is the same one that we made you Governor of on our last little trip," Barbie said. I growled. Then we were both shoved off the ship and into the water, after Jack was given his pistol. We both managed to swim to shore, where Laurel and Elizabitch were waiting. "That's the second time I've had to watch that man sail away with my ship," Jack said mournfully, then started walking towards the center of the island. The three of us followed him.
"But you were marooned on this island before, weren't you? So we can escape in the same way you did then," Elizabitch protested.
"To what point and purpose, young missy? The Black Pearl is gone and unless the three you have a rudder and a lot of sails hidden in that bodices, unlikely, young Mr. Turner will be dead long before you can reach him," Jack said.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAH!! 'S NOT FAIR!!" Laurel and Elizabitch both sobbed, flinging themselves at each other. I gaped.
"But you're Captain Jack Sparrow. You vanished from under the eyes of seven agents of the East India Company. You sacked Nassau Port without even firing a shot. Are you the pirate I've read about or not? How did you escape last time?" Elizabitch asked after she was done sniveling.
"Last time.I was here a grand total of three days, alright? Last time [opens a secret cellar door] .the rumrunners used this island as a cache. Came by and I was able to barter a passage off. From the looks of things, they've long been out of business. Probably have your bloody ugly stupid dorky geeky jack ass friend Norrington to thank for that," Jack replied.
"So that's it then? That's the secret grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow ? You spent three days lying on a beach, drinking rum?!" Elizabeth asked, as if it were something to be ashamed of.
"REALLY? That's what you did? AWESOME!!!" I said happily, "I LOVE RUM!"
Jack grinned at me. "Welcome to the Caribbean, love," he said, and handed me a bottle of rum.
~Later that night~
"We're devils and black sheep and really bad eggs. Drink up me 'earties yo ho! Yo ho yo ho a pirate's life for me," Jack, Laurel, and I sang, dancing around the bonfire, obviously very, very drunk, while Elizabitch sat on the beach some distance away, rolling her eyes at us.
"I love this song! Really bad eggs! Woo. When I get the Pearl back, I'm gonna teach it to the whole crew and we'll sing it all the time!" Jack said, as he and I fell onto the sand. He put his arm around my shoulders and I said, "Yes, and you'll be positively the most fearsome pirate in the Spanish Main."
"Not just the Spanish Main, love, the entire ocean, the entire wo'ld. Wherever we want to go, that's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails that's what a ship needs but what a ship is.what the Black Pearl really is.is freedom," Jack said.
"It must really terrible for you to be trapped on this Island, Jack," Elizabeth said, strolling up and plucking a half empty bottle of rum off the ground.
"Oh yes, but the company is much better, and the scenery has certainly improved," he said, holding me close. I gazed into his gorgeous, beautiful, black-lined eyes and just . . . drooled. Then I realized that his face was awfully close to mine . . . by golly, HE WAS GONNA KISS ME!! AAH!!! And then he did. And we did. For a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very long time. Then Elizabeth gave a very loud "AHEM." And we stopped. But continued to stare at each other.
It was then that I realized that I was in love.
~
Coming up next time: THE RUM SCENE!!!! YEE!!
So0o0o0o0o what do y'all think? I bet that many of you are feeling jealous of Sarah right now . . . heh heh heh. But do review please!!