Hello everyone! We are Totally Clichéd, welcome to our story! There are
three members of Totally Clichéd, Silveretta, Cherny, and Jess. Silveretta
already has stories posted, so feel free to read them!!!
Anyways, thanks for visiting this story, hope you like it, enjoy!!!!
Chapter 1-How the Hell did that Happen?
The Prince of Mirkwood was quite happy to be honest. He was just a young elf, (as elves go) and was busily frolicking in a meadow, with wildflowers at his feet. A little butterfly flew by, he opened his mouth as if to yawn- except he didn't yawn. *Mmmmmmmmmm! Cabbage White, my favourite! The Peacocks aren't bad either!* he thought, as another unsuspecting insect flew in to Gaping Gob of Death, namely his mouth.
Suddenly, in a completely clichéd FanFiction fashion, he fell into a portal that had appeared in the ground. It was probably placed there by some evil individual who wanted to piss him off severely. All Legolas was thinking as he fell was *Oooooh, this is nice, never tried this before*, this is not an elf of the highest calibre. Eventually, the swirling blackness stopped and he landed with a thud on very hard stone, severely bruising his elfish buttocks O_o. This didn't particularly help his rapidly decreasing good mood.
"Ow! My delicate elfish buttocks!" he moaned. This was turning into a really bad day.
"Who are you? Are you new?" a drawling voice said.
Legolas drew himself up to his full height, which wasn't very tall, considering he was sitting down, and replied with as much dignity as his bruised buttocks would allow ,
"I am Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood."
"Oh, a title, eh? Impressive. I'm Draco Malfoy, hurry up, or you'll miss the train."
"Uh?"
"The train, the Hogwarts Express, the magical locomotive, whatever."
Naturally, Legolas had no idea what this boy was talking about. He did know that the speaker, Draco had absolutely exquisite hair, a shade paler than his own.
"Um, yes, of course, lead the way." The boy named Malfoy looked at him strangely, considering the train was right behind him.
Legolas pulled himself to his feet and dusted himself off. He followed the boy to a compartment in this 'train'. There were seats on either side of the compartment, and Legolas sat down on one gratefully. He winced, as his behind reminded him of what had happened only a few moments before. Draco seated himself opposite Legolas, and was now flanked by two monstrous boys, Legolas wondered if they were overgrown Orcs, they were monstrously ugly, as well as big.
"This is Crabbe, and this is Goyle." Said Draco, indicating to the lumps in turn.
"Hello" Legolas said nervously. The lumps grunted.
"So," said Draco, cleaning his nails with a knife, "you're new then. What house do you think you'll be in?"
*House?* Legolas thought.
"Haven't given it much thought? Slytherin is the best. That's the one I'm in. Where's all your stuff? I didn't see you with a trunk."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~* This is where the writers have reached a slight problem. What shall we do about Legolas's lack of stuff? Basically, he doesn't need robes, cos his clothes are strange enough already, and he ain't gonna use magic cuz he is an elf! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After a while of pointless and boring chatter and banter, the food cart came along, conveniently breaking the awkward silence, as it always seems to do.
"Anything from the trolley boys?" asked a very gruff looking wizard.
"What happened to the kindly old witch?" asked Draco, slightly bemused.
"The writers felt that she just wasn't right, and as she was only a minor part, she was axed. I'm Boris, her replacement."
"O.K.... well, Boris, nothing for me, I don't want to lose that cute ass that half of the girls around the world fancy."
"Do you have any butterflies?" Asked Legolas hopefully.
"Uh, no! Can I interest you in a Chocolate Frog?"
"Eating frogs? That's inhumane!" Legolas screamed girlishly. He dove at the trolley and opened all the packets of Chocolate Frogs on the trolley.
"Run free, little froggies, run free!" to his surprise, the frogs weren't the same ones used in the movie and didn't hop away. Instead, they just lay there looking rather helpless.
"Oh my God!!!! You killed them! You monster!" sobbed Legolas, lying on the floor.
By now everyone in the carriage was slightly disturbed. Luckily, time had flown by phenomenally quickly and the train stopped.
"Hogwarts! Hogwarts station!" a voice called from nowhere in particular.
The strange company in the carriage departed, including Legolas, who picked himself up off the floor.
As they stepped off the train, Legolas was greeted by a hug man wearing a large overcoat.
"Gimli? You've grown a bit haven't you?"
"I'm not Gimli. I am Rubeus Hagrid, keeper of the keys and Groundskeeper of Hogwarts."
This strangely proved too much for Legolas, he uttered a wild high-pitched cry, lay on his back... And had a tantrum!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Thanks for reading this!!
Jess: wow that was really good wasn't it ?!?!?!? *all stand and applaud really loudly*
Jess: We couldn't have done it without the support of our beloved husbands, Brad Pitt, Keanu Reaves and Sean Biggerstaff.
Silveretta : You wish Jess.
Cherny: Still, we can dream.mmmmm. Sean...
Jess: Ahem! Yes!
Silveretta: Anyways..
Cherny: Read and Review!!!!!
Chapter 1-How the Hell did that Happen?
The Prince of Mirkwood was quite happy to be honest. He was just a young elf, (as elves go) and was busily frolicking in a meadow, with wildflowers at his feet. A little butterfly flew by, he opened his mouth as if to yawn- except he didn't yawn. *Mmmmmmmmmm! Cabbage White, my favourite! The Peacocks aren't bad either!* he thought, as another unsuspecting insect flew in to Gaping Gob of Death, namely his mouth.
Suddenly, in a completely clichéd FanFiction fashion, he fell into a portal that had appeared in the ground. It was probably placed there by some evil individual who wanted to piss him off severely. All Legolas was thinking as he fell was *Oooooh, this is nice, never tried this before*, this is not an elf of the highest calibre. Eventually, the swirling blackness stopped and he landed with a thud on very hard stone, severely bruising his elfish buttocks O_o. This didn't particularly help his rapidly decreasing good mood.
"Ow! My delicate elfish buttocks!" he moaned. This was turning into a really bad day.
"Who are you? Are you new?" a drawling voice said.
Legolas drew himself up to his full height, which wasn't very tall, considering he was sitting down, and replied with as much dignity as his bruised buttocks would allow ,
"I am Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood."
"Oh, a title, eh? Impressive. I'm Draco Malfoy, hurry up, or you'll miss the train."
"Uh?"
"The train, the Hogwarts Express, the magical locomotive, whatever."
Naturally, Legolas had no idea what this boy was talking about. He did know that the speaker, Draco had absolutely exquisite hair, a shade paler than his own.
"Um, yes, of course, lead the way." The boy named Malfoy looked at him strangely, considering the train was right behind him.
Legolas pulled himself to his feet and dusted himself off. He followed the boy to a compartment in this 'train'. There were seats on either side of the compartment, and Legolas sat down on one gratefully. He winced, as his behind reminded him of what had happened only a few moments before. Draco seated himself opposite Legolas, and was now flanked by two monstrous boys, Legolas wondered if they were overgrown Orcs, they were monstrously ugly, as well as big.
"This is Crabbe, and this is Goyle." Said Draco, indicating to the lumps in turn.
"Hello" Legolas said nervously. The lumps grunted.
"So," said Draco, cleaning his nails with a knife, "you're new then. What house do you think you'll be in?"
*House?* Legolas thought.
"Haven't given it much thought? Slytherin is the best. That's the one I'm in. Where's all your stuff? I didn't see you with a trunk."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~* This is where the writers have reached a slight problem. What shall we do about Legolas's lack of stuff? Basically, he doesn't need robes, cos his clothes are strange enough already, and he ain't gonna use magic cuz he is an elf! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After a while of pointless and boring chatter and banter, the food cart came along, conveniently breaking the awkward silence, as it always seems to do.
"Anything from the trolley boys?" asked a very gruff looking wizard.
"What happened to the kindly old witch?" asked Draco, slightly bemused.
"The writers felt that she just wasn't right, and as she was only a minor part, she was axed. I'm Boris, her replacement."
"O.K.... well, Boris, nothing for me, I don't want to lose that cute ass that half of the girls around the world fancy."
"Do you have any butterflies?" Asked Legolas hopefully.
"Uh, no! Can I interest you in a Chocolate Frog?"
"Eating frogs? That's inhumane!" Legolas screamed girlishly. He dove at the trolley and opened all the packets of Chocolate Frogs on the trolley.
"Run free, little froggies, run free!" to his surprise, the frogs weren't the same ones used in the movie and didn't hop away. Instead, they just lay there looking rather helpless.
"Oh my God!!!! You killed them! You monster!" sobbed Legolas, lying on the floor.
By now everyone in the carriage was slightly disturbed. Luckily, time had flown by phenomenally quickly and the train stopped.
"Hogwarts! Hogwarts station!" a voice called from nowhere in particular.
The strange company in the carriage departed, including Legolas, who picked himself up off the floor.
As they stepped off the train, Legolas was greeted by a hug man wearing a large overcoat.
"Gimli? You've grown a bit haven't you?"
"I'm not Gimli. I am Rubeus Hagrid, keeper of the keys and Groundskeeper of Hogwarts."
This strangely proved too much for Legolas, he uttered a wild high-pitched cry, lay on his back... And had a tantrum!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Thanks for reading this!!
Jess: wow that was really good wasn't it ?!?!?!? *all stand and applaud really loudly*
Jess: We couldn't have done it without the support of our beloved husbands, Brad Pitt, Keanu Reaves and Sean Biggerstaff.
Silveretta : You wish Jess.
Cherny: Still, we can dream.mmmmm. Sean...
Jess: Ahem! Yes!
Silveretta: Anyways..
Cherny: Read and Review!!!!!