Disclaimer: I don't own Dora the Explorer, if I did, I would have committed suicide by now.
Vicki meets Dora…One bright sunny day in North Carolina,
Vicki and her three relatives, Nathan, Eldi, and Eddie, were
Sitting around, really bored.
Nathan: What da ya wanna do?
Eldi: Well, we can't go to our base until the moms and dads
are back from the Food Lion, they won't let us out in the
bay completely alone.
Vicki (feeling a bit random): There are 14 Food Lions from
here to Virginia; I'll rule the world some day!!!
Mwahahahahahahaha!!!
Eddie: You always say that!
Nathan: Hmmmm…
Eldi: Hmmmm…
Nathan: I GOT IT!!!!
Eddie: What? Another plan to kill Marik and steal his
rod??? He's a cartoon! A
CARTOON I SAY!!!!!!!!!
(Marik is from YuGiOh for those of you who aren't fans)
Eldi: NO!!!! He's real I swear!!! I got his autograph!!!
Nathan: Right, lets see what's on TV……………
Vicki: It's Dora the Explorer; I hate this show, hey
wouldn't it be funny if someone got zapped into the TV or
… AHHHHHHHH!
Vicki: Where the heck am I???????
Voice that is very familiar: Ola!!!
Vicki: uhhhhhhhhhh… NOOOOOOO!!!! It's you! It burns, it burns!!!!
Vicki cringes in pain after seeing………………….
Possessor of voice: Ola!!! I'm DORA!!!!
Vicki: Nooooo, where's Nathan, Eldi, and Eddie???
Boots: Hi! I'm Bo………………..
Vicki: Boots, I know.
Dora: Amazing, she knows you!
Vicki in thought: Maybe I can make them take me to their secret base. And maybe they'll have advanced technology that will help me take over the world!!!! Or maybe they'll even have a Popsicle stick… hmmmmm…
Boots: Are you ok?
(Vicki is still in thought)
Dora: Who are you, great mind reading one?
Vicki back to reality: Why do you want to know, hmmmm?
Dora: We just wanted to know your name, oh well.
Boots: We're going to the……………..
Vicki (who had seen the previews for this show): Firehouse, right?
Dora: How'd she know!?
Vicki: uhhhh… mind reading powers I possessed by killing a crazy maroon haired gorilla? I used a Popsicle stick, hee, hee.
Boots smiling: Really? So that's what happened to my uncle!!
Vicki in thought: he doesn't seem disturbed, his brain power must be so low he doesn't realize that I just admitted to murder… which I didn't do, but I said I did, but I didn't do, that I wished I did, with a Popsicle stick in my pocket, that's not in my pocket, that, oh, I give up!
Dora and Boots run off hand in hand to a Fire department that magically appears out of nowhere.
Dora: Come on great mind reading one!
Vicki follows hoping for a sign of intelligence somewhere.
Boots: Look, look!!! The new Red fire truck!
Dora: Yeah!!! Come on Great mind reading one! Lets go see the new fire truck!!!
Vicki: Do I have ta?
Boots/Dora: Si!!!
Slowly Vicki made her way over to the rather retarded looking truck.
Red Truck: OLA!!!
Vicki: IT TALKS, OH MY GO…
Dora: Godiva chocolates are yummy!
Vicki has gone into a state of shock. I mean, being zapped into a cartoon you hate, and then having a stupid vehicle talk to you is enough to drive anyone crazy. But Vicki, already being partly crazy, was unaffected in this way.
RING RING!!!
Dora: Oh my godiva chocolates!
Boots: The phone, the phone!
Dora goes to answer the phone inside the truck.
One minute later
Dora: Boots! Great mind reading one! A kitty,
Vicki: is stuck in a tree, who really cares, it will jump eventually!
Dora: She did it again! She truly is a mind reader!
Random Fireman who appears out of no where: Hello Dora, we have a lot on our hands today, why don't you go save that kitty, you can take our new truck!
Boots/Dora: OK!!!
Vicki: No way!
Random fireman disappears
Vicki: That was creepy.
Dora: Lets go! But I don't know the way to the tree! Who can help us?
Awkward silence
Vicki: What? Are you asking me? Oh, you're a mind slave thingamagummy, aren't you, speak, darn you, speak!!! Take me to your master!!!!
Dora: That's right! The map can help us!
Boots: Say map, say map, great mind reading one!
Vicki: No, NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I WILL NOT SAY MAP!!! I just said it, didn't I? DIDN'T I!!!!????
Map appears out of nowhere
Map: If there's a place you want to go…(I am soooooo not writing this whole song!)
Map: Ok, go tell Dora, Town, gas station, big tree! (Map repeats this about 1900.5 squared times)
Vicki: I GET IT!!! IF YOU SAY IT ONE MORE TIME, I SWEAR I'LL KILL YOU!!!
Map disappears.
Dora: So, where do we go?
Vicki: You didn't hear it? The map, said we have to go to a town, a gas station, and a friggin tree…
Dora hops into the red truck.
Boots/Dora: Lets go!
Vicki hops in truck
Vicki in thought: I'm going insane, aren't I?
Red Truck/Dora/Boots all start singing.
Vicki: NOOOOOOO!!!! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!!!!
Dora: We're at the town, but all these people are in the way! What should we do great mind reading one?
Vicki: Why should I help you?
Boots: We'll let you go home if you do……………..
Vicki: And I thought you were stupid, ok, I'll help………..
GET OUT OF THE WAY YOU IDIOTS! OR I WILL KILL YOU! THAT'S RIGHT; WE'LL RUN YOU OVER IF YOU DON'T MOVE! THEN I'LL TAKE THIS CITY HOSTAGE, MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
The towns people, only understanding Spanish, ignored Vicki.
Dora: I know! Why don't we put on the siren?
Vicki: siren, why didn't you think of that before I agreed to help you?
Dora sounding more serious: Because, if I did, you wouldn't help us…
Vicki: You just sounded intelligent for a second there…
Dora: hee, hee! Your funny! Was that a compliment?
Red Fire truck: Where should we go?
Boots: Yea! Should we go down the orange path, or the gold path?
(The orange path led to a volcano, the gold path led to a suspicious gas station)
Vicki: Lets go to the volcano…* then I can throw Dora and her "friends" into it, this cause the volcano to erupt in a desperate attempt to get away from Dora! MWHAHAHAHAHA!!!*
The red truck starts going down the gold path.
Vicki: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Dora: YEAH!!!
Boots/Truck: Oh no!!!
Dora: OH MY GODIVA CHOCOALATES!!!
Vicki: Sob, sob, what?
Dora: We're completely out of gas! We won't make it to the big tree!!!
Boots: Oh no, oh no!!!
Vicki: You know… if we're completely out of gas, WHY ARE WE STILL MOVING??!!
Dora: Uhhhhh, look a talking monkey!
Vicki: Nice try, but that's Boots!
Dora: Ummm, where will we get more gas?
Truck parks in front of gas station.
Boots: Yes, were in the world could we get some gas for this truck?
Vicki: Gee, I wonder, maybe this gas station can help us!
Dora: Muy Bien! Great mind reading one (GMO) the gas station can help us!!!
Vicki: I never could have guessed…
Dora asked for help from imaginary children while she filled the tank up.
Vicki in thought yet again: If only I had a match, the I could give it to Boots and have him blow up this establishment as I make my get away… then I could make my way back to the real world…
Truck: We're off!
Boots: YEA!!!
Random gas station owner: HEY, COME BACK YOU CRAZY KIDS!!! YOU STILL DIDN'T PAY!!!!
Vicki: You didn't pay?
Dora: Ahem… look! A talking monkey!
Vicki: You're such a re…
Dora: REMARKABLE person! I know…
Vicki is getting very angry.
Truck: Oh no! There are other cars in the way!
Vicki: Get out of the friggin way! I wanna go back to the house, as in my world! I'm warning you! I'll get you! I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!!!
Cars pay no attention.
Dora: Which button should I push? One button is the windshield wipers, the other is the siren!
Boots: The windshield wipers will work!
Vicki: No they won't you insane talking monkey! Why are you purple!!!
Dora: Isn't that a bit off topic? Anyways, I'll push the siren button!
Vicki: No, this is off topic… there are 14 food lions from North Carolina to Virginia!
The car moves
Boots: OH NO!!! It's raining!
Vicki: What, afraid you might get clean if the water touches you? Maybe I should push you out the window.
Dora: NO! We can't see! Which button should I push?
Vicki: Gee, I really do wonder…
Boots: The siren, the siren!
Dora: No! The windshield wipers! Muy bien Boots, GMO!
Truck: YEAH!!!!
A tree appears out of nowhere.
A bunch of creepy bugs appear with miniature instruments.
Vicki Jumps out of truck: DIE BUGS DIE!!!!
Vicki starts to stomp on the bugs.
Dora: Anger management GMO.
Vicki: It's official… I've lost my mind…
A random little animal that's purple: DORA!!! That's my kitty… can you save her? Her name is Matilda……
Dora: Of course!
Boots hops on a ladder.
Boots: I'll save you kitty!
The kitty is sleeping looking rather relaxed. Apparently the cat ran away from the purple creature and was quite content in the tree. In fact, the cat was not a girl at all.
Boots: Oh NO!!!
Dora: Oh no! What should we do GMO? How can we get to the top of the tree?
Vicki: uhhhhhhh………………
Boots: GMO!!! Say backpack, say backpack!
Vicki: I'm not falling for this again you purple monkey!
Boots: Now, how was that an insult?
Vicki: I don't know……………..
Dora: BACKPACK!!!
Vicki: Nooooooooooooooo………………...
A backpack magically appears like ever other unimportant thing does.
Backpack: What do you want GMO!!!
Vicki: Uhhhhh…
Backpack: Which item can help Dora?
A rubber chicken, a wrench, a candlestick, a Clue game, and a ladder appear. They start to circle the backpack.
Vicki: the ladder should work but can I have that, ahem, wrench?
Backpack: SI!!!
Vicki in thought: Yes! Now I can kill Dora!!!
Dora: Muy Bien!!! Now we can save the kitty, but how will we do it?
Vicki: Two things, why don't you raise the ladder to the tree, and, Boots is a monkey. Monkeys can climb. Therefore, BOOTS CAN CLIMB THE TREE AND "SAVE" MATILDA!!!!!!!
Dora: Oh my godiva chocolates! Do you see Swiper, he's always,
Vicki: trying to swipe your stuff, I know, I KNOW!!!
Others look amazed
Swiper comes and starts to "sneak up" on the gang. Vicki is looking straight at him. Finally Swiper is close enough for Dora to see.
Dora/Boots: Swiper no swiping, Swiper no swiping, Swiper no swiping!
Swiper: Aw, Man!!!
Vicki: Swiper, do me a favor, hit Dora with this wrench and swipe her backpack, and the map, perhaps you should even kidnap Dora!
Swiper: Oh, Ok.
Swiper starts to attack Dora, but Dora takes out a 3inch long dagger, puts on a leather jacket, a bandanna and seems a whole lot tougher.
As this is all going on,
Boots is putting the ladder up to the tree. Finally he brings the kitty down.
Boots: Here you go!
The odd purple creature does a little victory dance and takes the cat. The cat begins to attack the creature. No one seems to care.
Dora begins to sing as she kicks Swiper down the hill.
Swiper: AWWWW, MAN!!! Owwwwww…………
Vicki: Don't sing! If you do I'll kill you. I know where you live.
Dora: Oh, o.k.
Vicki: Can I please go home now? I'm late for my meeting at the base!!! We were going to plot how to take over the world, and make it look like an accident!!!
Dora is absent-mindedly swinging the wrench she took from Swiper around and around.
Boots: Perhaps, MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Vicki: Where'd that come from? I still wanna go………..
Dora accidentally hits Vicki with the wrench causing everything to go black. (For Vicki any way)
This is my first fic eva! So if it stinks… I've got an excuse, MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! But if you really want a next chapter I'll need 5 reviews, you do want to know if I'm ok, don't you? And, why is Boots acting so oddly? What ever happened to the three other kids, Eldi, Eddie, and Nathan? And, will that random Gas station owner get his revenge? Dun dun dun….
Oh, gotta go, I'm late for my meeting about taking over the world…AGAIN!!!