To some, Margaret Houlihan was almost impossible to read. If you were lucky
she'd let her emotions slip every once in a while, enabling you to take a
tiny peek. The problem was that she hid them so well. Some days it was hard
to tell if she were in a good mood or bad, she was that well bound. But
like all secrets, there's always that one person who knows, the person you
tell everything to. In this case it was him, the only man who really knew
her. Just one glance and he could read her like a book.
He couldn't remember when it started, perhaps at the beginning of the war. He knew they certainly were not close, not like they were now, not lovers, but close enough for him to see her. Whenever it was, all he had to do was watch her and know something was wrong.
This was one of those times. Hawkeye knew that it was wrong for him to scare her like that, but she was taking the whole thing too far. Normally she'd scream at him and hit him and then they'd make up. For some reason that didn't happen this time, and it killed him that he didn't know why. After all, most couples didn't have huge fights about tricking their mate and pulling them into the water if they were already planning on getting wet. He knew she was upset about something more than some little joke, that wasn't her. Tonight Hawkeye was going to find out why.
Hawkeye walked into the cool shower tent. No one had been in there recently; there wasn't any water on the floor. Good, that meant there was still hot water. He slipped off his robe and hung it on nail by the door. Quickly he opened the door to the shower and stepped in, it was always embarrassing to get caught standing there naked. Not that he ever had. Hawkeye stood off to the side while the water began to warm up, then moving to stand under the hot spray. He lathered his body into a nice soapy foam and washed his hair. By the time he'd finished rinsing Father Mulcahy had also walked into the tent.
"Ah Hawkeye," the priest said as he walked into the stall beside him, "Washing away the daily dirt I see."
"Yes Father," Hawkeye replied quickly, Mulcahy had given him few chosen words the day before as well.
"I love a good shower my self," he said setting he classes down, "Can't wait to get home and try one."
"I'd settle for Seoul first Father," he began to dry him self of with his towel, "It's closer."
"Ah, I see what you mean," Hawkeye grabbed his robe and put it on, "Are you going to talk with Major Houlihan soon? She's still awfully upset."
Hawkeye struggled to smile. Cautiously he gritted his teeth, "I was planning on doing it very soon."
"That's wonderful Hawkeye, I'm sure you'll both feel better," Mulcahy said as he smiled brightly and continued to wash his hair.
"Thank you Father," Hawkeye mumbled as he walked out of the tent. It was a good thing he was doing it tonight, he didn't know how much longer he could take people nagging him.
He walked into the Swamp to find it empty. After digging through his footlocker he found a nice pair of white boxers and clean socks. He put them on along with a fresh pair of pants. Hawkeye took out his new razor, the one he'd bought in Tokyo, and carefully shaved his face. When he was done he put on a black, button down shirt. He left the buttons undone but rolled up the sleeves, he hardly got a chance to wear it; Margaret had given it to him, it was one of her favorites. Then he combed his hair so a single lock of hair fell across his eyes, he knew it drove her wild.
After checking that he had everything, he made his way over to Margaret's tent. She was on duty for another ten minutes, he knew this would be the first place she'd go when she got off. He turned off the lights and sat in the chair beside her desk. After a couple minutes the door opened as she struggled to find the light switch. It took her a couple moments, but eventually she found it.
Almost instantly she looked up to see him there. He was sitting back in her chair, holding a single rose. Normally she would have been mad, but how could she be at this?
"Hawkeye," she said looking at him, watching as he stood up and walked towards her.
"It was dumb of me to play that joke on you, I wasn't thinking, the last I'd ever want to do is hurt you," he said handing her the rose. Gently he kissed her soft lips.
"You have no idea how much you scared me," she said pulling away from him and walking across the tent. "I thought something had really happened to you, I was afraid I'd never see you again." Tears rolled down her cheeks as she began to cry. Hawkeye walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her; silently she buried her face in his chest as he held her.
"It's okay," he told her as he rubbed her back, "I'm right here." Margaret began to cry harder, like always she only needed him to hold her. After a few minutes her cries turned to sobs and she pulled away.
"I'm sorry," she told him as tears continued to pour, "I know it's stupid to get angry at you over something so dumb."
"No, don't say that," he said running a thumb across her cheek, "I shouldn't have done it, there's no excuse."
"You don't understand," she said stepping away.
"What don't I understand?" He took a step closer to her, but she backed up and sat on the bed.
"Here, sit down," she directed him to sit beside her so they were facing each other.
"Alright," he said a little confused.
"People have always been coming in and out of my life," Margaret started, "Every person that I've ever gotten close to, just ended up leaving in the end. I suppose that's why I put that barricade up in the first place. I've never had some one love me like this before, not like you." Hawkeye was watching her intensely, his eyes were moist, "And I got scared when you didn't come up. I was afraid that it was going to happen again, that I was going to be left alone," suddenly she broke down crying, "I can't lose you."
"I'm not going anywhere," he whispered into her hair as he held her, "I promise."
"I love you so much, I don't know what I'd do with out you," she told him as she wrapped her arms around his waist, "No one's ever meant this much to me before."
He pulled her up so they were almost touching noses, looking her square in the eye he said, "I have never, nor will I ever, love someone more than I love you. I don't think I could live with myself if something ever happened to you."
"Oh Hawkeye," she whispered, "What would I do without you?"
"I promise you'll never have to find out," he whispered back as he nuzzled her. She leaned against his chest, relaxing for the first time in two days.
"I should have told you my about insecurities sooner," Margaret said as he rubbed her back.
"Everyone gets a little scared at some point, especially when they have something that means so much to them."
"I know that now." She sat up and looked at him. "I feel bad about everything that happened, I was awfully ruff on the nurses."
"I know, I already got chewed out by half of them." Margaret giggled as he explained what had happened. "And you know something else? When I was in the mess tent everyone seemed to staring at me, like they knew what was going on."
"I didn't tell anyone, I can't imagine who would do that."
"I have a couple of ideas."
"No, they wouldn't do that," she said strongly referring to the others, "But even if they did, why would anyone care?" Hawkeye shrugged his shoulders. "I mean no one else knows about us but us."
"That's what I said."
"Unless," she paused and raised her eyebrows.
"No one could have seen us, we've been careful. I haven't kissed you without knowing we were alone," he said cutting her off.
"I wasn't thinking that." She shifted so she was practically in his lap.
"Then what were you thinking?"
"Well, maybe they heard us." She said mischievously, eyes twinkling with fun.
"I know that's not possible, we've been especially careful about that. I remember because I almost swallowed my tongue once."
"Really? I must have not been there for that one. You were always the screamer," she teased.
"Speak for your self," he told her shifting on the bed.
"Go ahead deny it."
"Okay, I admit I let myself go a bit in Tokyo, but there was no way anyone could have heard us. We were on the top floor far away from the other suites."
"You do have a point there," she knew he was right, it looked like he was going to win this one.
"I suppose it wouldn't be a bad thing if someone did find out about us," he said jolting her from her thoughts.
"Oh?" This was news to her. He'd always been in favor of keeping it a secret.
"What would be so bad about telling everyone that I'm love with an amazing, caring, gentle, loving, woman? Who just so happens to have a wonderful sense of humor, a body I could worship forever, and who just has to be the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. What kind of fool would want to hide that?"
"Damn," she said as she let out a heavy breath.
"What?"
"That was really good."
"So it worked?" He asked as he neared her again, mouth close to hers.
"Umm Hmm," she muttered as he drew her into a soft kiss. She meant to pull away from him, just to tease him and let him suffer. Suddenly it didn't look like that was going to happen.
Margaret moved closer, giving her self better access to his lips. Her hands went to his head as she pulled him into her, deepening the kiss. Slowly he pushed her down onto the cot so her shoulders and back were squarely resting against the mattress and he was on top. The once gentle kisses had suddenly turned hot and passionate. Hawkeye's hand went under her shirt and proceeded to caress the soft skin. With in moments he had lifted the clothing over her head and disposed of it to the floor. Margaret struggled with his belt as her unhooked her bra. Five minutes later the floor was scattered with hastily discarded clothing.
About an hour later the exhausted couple lay sprawled across her bed. Hawkeye was lying between her legs, head resting on her chest. In the beginning of their romance, out of pure exhaustion, he'd collapse onto her after they'd made love. Now it had turned into one of his favorite spots. She would run her hands up and down his back and through his hair, calming him until his breathing had deepened and settled into a steady rhythm.
"You know," Margaret said softly, eyes looking at the ceiling, "I wonder what Frank would do if he caught us like this."
"What? You mean all sweaty and tired, lying on top of one another? That type of thing?" Hawkeye said drowsily. His eyes closed as she continued to stroke his hair.
"Yeah," she chuckled, "Could you just imagine his face?"
"Sure, his best fling and worst enemy in bed together. He'd kill us before we could even get out a word," he mumbled into her chest.
"Well it would serve him right," she said a strongly, "Did you know that we never did anything like this when he was here?"
"No I did not," Hawkeye didn't really want to hear about her and Frank in bed.
"Well we didn't, he'd just drop over for a quick romp between the sheets and then leave. Ooh it used to make me so angry." She was talking more to herself than him.
"Baby," Hawkeye tired to catch her attention.
"And he was always so smug, he wasn't even good."
"Honey," he said louder, she was working her self into a fit.
"It was like that every single time!"
"Margaret!" Hawkeye finally yelled. He pulled him self up so they were face to face, her hands were now around his shoulders.
"What?" She had no clue.
"Frank isn't here, he's never coming back. I'm here, I love you. That's all that matters," he said as he kissed her softly.
"I know, he just really gets to me. I'm sorry," she kissed him again.
"Besides, I'm way better than Frank," Hawkeye said a few centimeters away from her lips, smirking.
"Radar could have been better than Frank, he was that bad."
Hawkeye pressed his lips to hers to quiet her, "Please, I'm having a hard enough time thinking about you and Frank together."
She kissed him again and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot to think how you'd feel about hearing all this," she could tell he was feeling a little rejected.
"That's okay, Frank is gone. It's just us for now on," he told her, stroking her face. Margaret smiled and placed her hand on his. Again they kissed sweetly.
"I love being able to do that," she said as he slowly pulled away, her eyes were still closed.
Hawkeye twirled a few strands of her hair with his fingers, quickly a smile spread across his face. "I can think of something else I love being able to do."
"You read my mind," she said giving him an innovative leer.
Hawkeye pulled him self-up further so he was directly on top of her. "I promise you that you won't think about Frank once," he said kissing her soundly, "I'm much better than that."
It was about five O'clock in the morning when the P.A. came on. Wounded were arriving by chopper, jeep, and ambulance. It was going to be a long one. Everyone came out to greet the injured, except for a two certain people.
"Has anyone seen Pierce or Houlihan?" Colonel Potter called when he realized they were no where to be seen.
"I haven't seen him since this afternoon," BJ called back, although he was too busy concentrating on his patient to worry at the moment.
"Well, I did see Hawkeye in the shower after dinner. He told me he was going to work things over with the major," Father Mulcahy spoke up as he assisted to carry one of the wounded off the bus.
"That's probably what happened," Potter said as he examined the next kid, "They've gotten into an argument again. Who knows how long they've been going at it."
"It's probably all over now, she would have killed him by now," Charles chuckled beside him.
"Could be, she's as fiery as hornets nest in July," Potter sent the next one in. "Klinger!" He called.
"Yes sir?" The Lebanese bellowed as he hurried over.
"Go over to Major Houlihan's tent. Get her and Captain Pierce, they're probably still going at each other's throats."
"Right sir," Klinger said as he dashed across the compound.
Hawkeye and Margaret never heard the announcement; in fact they weren't even awake, but instead in a deep sleep. After their 'busy' night they finally fell asleep around three O'clock in each other's arms. Margaret was sleeping with her back to Hawkeye while he slept with his face resting against the back of her neck. His arms were securely wrapped around her waist as she threaded her fingers through his.
Klinger rounded the corner and came up to her door. Silently he knocked, no answer. He couldn't hear any voices; maybe they weren't there. Again he knocked on the door, still nothing. Slowly he opened the door and walked in, maybe they had gotten into another fight and the captain had already left. Maybe the major was sleeping. Klinger walked over to the bed, she was sleeping. He was about to shake her shoulder when suddenly he realized she wasn't alone.
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I'm sorry this took a while. I was really busy with school. Please review. I would really appreciate it. The more reviews, the quicker I'll be able to get the next chapter out.
He couldn't remember when it started, perhaps at the beginning of the war. He knew they certainly were not close, not like they were now, not lovers, but close enough for him to see her. Whenever it was, all he had to do was watch her and know something was wrong.
This was one of those times. Hawkeye knew that it was wrong for him to scare her like that, but she was taking the whole thing too far. Normally she'd scream at him and hit him and then they'd make up. For some reason that didn't happen this time, and it killed him that he didn't know why. After all, most couples didn't have huge fights about tricking their mate and pulling them into the water if they were already planning on getting wet. He knew she was upset about something more than some little joke, that wasn't her. Tonight Hawkeye was going to find out why.
Hawkeye walked into the cool shower tent. No one had been in there recently; there wasn't any water on the floor. Good, that meant there was still hot water. He slipped off his robe and hung it on nail by the door. Quickly he opened the door to the shower and stepped in, it was always embarrassing to get caught standing there naked. Not that he ever had. Hawkeye stood off to the side while the water began to warm up, then moving to stand under the hot spray. He lathered his body into a nice soapy foam and washed his hair. By the time he'd finished rinsing Father Mulcahy had also walked into the tent.
"Ah Hawkeye," the priest said as he walked into the stall beside him, "Washing away the daily dirt I see."
"Yes Father," Hawkeye replied quickly, Mulcahy had given him few chosen words the day before as well.
"I love a good shower my self," he said setting he classes down, "Can't wait to get home and try one."
"I'd settle for Seoul first Father," he began to dry him self of with his towel, "It's closer."
"Ah, I see what you mean," Hawkeye grabbed his robe and put it on, "Are you going to talk with Major Houlihan soon? She's still awfully upset."
Hawkeye struggled to smile. Cautiously he gritted his teeth, "I was planning on doing it very soon."
"That's wonderful Hawkeye, I'm sure you'll both feel better," Mulcahy said as he smiled brightly and continued to wash his hair.
"Thank you Father," Hawkeye mumbled as he walked out of the tent. It was a good thing he was doing it tonight, he didn't know how much longer he could take people nagging him.
He walked into the Swamp to find it empty. After digging through his footlocker he found a nice pair of white boxers and clean socks. He put them on along with a fresh pair of pants. Hawkeye took out his new razor, the one he'd bought in Tokyo, and carefully shaved his face. When he was done he put on a black, button down shirt. He left the buttons undone but rolled up the sleeves, he hardly got a chance to wear it; Margaret had given it to him, it was one of her favorites. Then he combed his hair so a single lock of hair fell across his eyes, he knew it drove her wild.
After checking that he had everything, he made his way over to Margaret's tent. She was on duty for another ten minutes, he knew this would be the first place she'd go when she got off. He turned off the lights and sat in the chair beside her desk. After a couple minutes the door opened as she struggled to find the light switch. It took her a couple moments, but eventually she found it.
Almost instantly she looked up to see him there. He was sitting back in her chair, holding a single rose. Normally she would have been mad, but how could she be at this?
"Hawkeye," she said looking at him, watching as he stood up and walked towards her.
"It was dumb of me to play that joke on you, I wasn't thinking, the last I'd ever want to do is hurt you," he said handing her the rose. Gently he kissed her soft lips.
"You have no idea how much you scared me," she said pulling away from him and walking across the tent. "I thought something had really happened to you, I was afraid I'd never see you again." Tears rolled down her cheeks as she began to cry. Hawkeye walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her; silently she buried her face in his chest as he held her.
"It's okay," he told her as he rubbed her back, "I'm right here." Margaret began to cry harder, like always she only needed him to hold her. After a few minutes her cries turned to sobs and she pulled away.
"I'm sorry," she told him as tears continued to pour, "I know it's stupid to get angry at you over something so dumb."
"No, don't say that," he said running a thumb across her cheek, "I shouldn't have done it, there's no excuse."
"You don't understand," she said stepping away.
"What don't I understand?" He took a step closer to her, but she backed up and sat on the bed.
"Here, sit down," she directed him to sit beside her so they were facing each other.
"Alright," he said a little confused.
"People have always been coming in and out of my life," Margaret started, "Every person that I've ever gotten close to, just ended up leaving in the end. I suppose that's why I put that barricade up in the first place. I've never had some one love me like this before, not like you." Hawkeye was watching her intensely, his eyes were moist, "And I got scared when you didn't come up. I was afraid that it was going to happen again, that I was going to be left alone," suddenly she broke down crying, "I can't lose you."
"I'm not going anywhere," he whispered into her hair as he held her, "I promise."
"I love you so much, I don't know what I'd do with out you," she told him as she wrapped her arms around his waist, "No one's ever meant this much to me before."
He pulled her up so they were almost touching noses, looking her square in the eye he said, "I have never, nor will I ever, love someone more than I love you. I don't think I could live with myself if something ever happened to you."
"Oh Hawkeye," she whispered, "What would I do without you?"
"I promise you'll never have to find out," he whispered back as he nuzzled her. She leaned against his chest, relaxing for the first time in two days.
"I should have told you my about insecurities sooner," Margaret said as he rubbed her back.
"Everyone gets a little scared at some point, especially when they have something that means so much to them."
"I know that now." She sat up and looked at him. "I feel bad about everything that happened, I was awfully ruff on the nurses."
"I know, I already got chewed out by half of them." Margaret giggled as he explained what had happened. "And you know something else? When I was in the mess tent everyone seemed to staring at me, like they knew what was going on."
"I didn't tell anyone, I can't imagine who would do that."
"I have a couple of ideas."
"No, they wouldn't do that," she said strongly referring to the others, "But even if they did, why would anyone care?" Hawkeye shrugged his shoulders. "I mean no one else knows about us but us."
"That's what I said."
"Unless," she paused and raised her eyebrows.
"No one could have seen us, we've been careful. I haven't kissed you without knowing we were alone," he said cutting her off.
"I wasn't thinking that." She shifted so she was practically in his lap.
"Then what were you thinking?"
"Well, maybe they heard us." She said mischievously, eyes twinkling with fun.
"I know that's not possible, we've been especially careful about that. I remember because I almost swallowed my tongue once."
"Really? I must have not been there for that one. You were always the screamer," she teased.
"Speak for your self," he told her shifting on the bed.
"Go ahead deny it."
"Okay, I admit I let myself go a bit in Tokyo, but there was no way anyone could have heard us. We were on the top floor far away from the other suites."
"You do have a point there," she knew he was right, it looked like he was going to win this one.
"I suppose it wouldn't be a bad thing if someone did find out about us," he said jolting her from her thoughts.
"Oh?" This was news to her. He'd always been in favor of keeping it a secret.
"What would be so bad about telling everyone that I'm love with an amazing, caring, gentle, loving, woman? Who just so happens to have a wonderful sense of humor, a body I could worship forever, and who just has to be the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. What kind of fool would want to hide that?"
"Damn," she said as she let out a heavy breath.
"What?"
"That was really good."
"So it worked?" He asked as he neared her again, mouth close to hers.
"Umm Hmm," she muttered as he drew her into a soft kiss. She meant to pull away from him, just to tease him and let him suffer. Suddenly it didn't look like that was going to happen.
Margaret moved closer, giving her self better access to his lips. Her hands went to his head as she pulled him into her, deepening the kiss. Slowly he pushed her down onto the cot so her shoulders and back were squarely resting against the mattress and he was on top. The once gentle kisses had suddenly turned hot and passionate. Hawkeye's hand went under her shirt and proceeded to caress the soft skin. With in moments he had lifted the clothing over her head and disposed of it to the floor. Margaret struggled with his belt as her unhooked her bra. Five minutes later the floor was scattered with hastily discarded clothing.
About an hour later the exhausted couple lay sprawled across her bed. Hawkeye was lying between her legs, head resting on her chest. In the beginning of their romance, out of pure exhaustion, he'd collapse onto her after they'd made love. Now it had turned into one of his favorite spots. She would run her hands up and down his back and through his hair, calming him until his breathing had deepened and settled into a steady rhythm.
"You know," Margaret said softly, eyes looking at the ceiling, "I wonder what Frank would do if he caught us like this."
"What? You mean all sweaty and tired, lying on top of one another? That type of thing?" Hawkeye said drowsily. His eyes closed as she continued to stroke his hair.
"Yeah," she chuckled, "Could you just imagine his face?"
"Sure, his best fling and worst enemy in bed together. He'd kill us before we could even get out a word," he mumbled into her chest.
"Well it would serve him right," she said a strongly, "Did you know that we never did anything like this when he was here?"
"No I did not," Hawkeye didn't really want to hear about her and Frank in bed.
"Well we didn't, he'd just drop over for a quick romp between the sheets and then leave. Ooh it used to make me so angry." She was talking more to herself than him.
"Baby," Hawkeye tired to catch her attention.
"And he was always so smug, he wasn't even good."
"Honey," he said louder, she was working her self into a fit.
"It was like that every single time!"
"Margaret!" Hawkeye finally yelled. He pulled him self up so they were face to face, her hands were now around his shoulders.
"What?" She had no clue.
"Frank isn't here, he's never coming back. I'm here, I love you. That's all that matters," he said as he kissed her softly.
"I know, he just really gets to me. I'm sorry," she kissed him again.
"Besides, I'm way better than Frank," Hawkeye said a few centimeters away from her lips, smirking.
"Radar could have been better than Frank, he was that bad."
Hawkeye pressed his lips to hers to quiet her, "Please, I'm having a hard enough time thinking about you and Frank together."
She kissed him again and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot to think how you'd feel about hearing all this," she could tell he was feeling a little rejected.
"That's okay, Frank is gone. It's just us for now on," he told her, stroking her face. Margaret smiled and placed her hand on his. Again they kissed sweetly.
"I love being able to do that," she said as he slowly pulled away, her eyes were still closed.
Hawkeye twirled a few strands of her hair with his fingers, quickly a smile spread across his face. "I can think of something else I love being able to do."
"You read my mind," she said giving him an innovative leer.
Hawkeye pulled him self-up further so he was directly on top of her. "I promise you that you won't think about Frank once," he said kissing her soundly, "I'm much better than that."
It was about five O'clock in the morning when the P.A. came on. Wounded were arriving by chopper, jeep, and ambulance. It was going to be a long one. Everyone came out to greet the injured, except for a two certain people.
"Has anyone seen Pierce or Houlihan?" Colonel Potter called when he realized they were no where to be seen.
"I haven't seen him since this afternoon," BJ called back, although he was too busy concentrating on his patient to worry at the moment.
"Well, I did see Hawkeye in the shower after dinner. He told me he was going to work things over with the major," Father Mulcahy spoke up as he assisted to carry one of the wounded off the bus.
"That's probably what happened," Potter said as he examined the next kid, "They've gotten into an argument again. Who knows how long they've been going at it."
"It's probably all over now, she would have killed him by now," Charles chuckled beside him.
"Could be, she's as fiery as hornets nest in July," Potter sent the next one in. "Klinger!" He called.
"Yes sir?" The Lebanese bellowed as he hurried over.
"Go over to Major Houlihan's tent. Get her and Captain Pierce, they're probably still going at each other's throats."
"Right sir," Klinger said as he dashed across the compound.
Hawkeye and Margaret never heard the announcement; in fact they weren't even awake, but instead in a deep sleep. After their 'busy' night they finally fell asleep around three O'clock in each other's arms. Margaret was sleeping with her back to Hawkeye while he slept with his face resting against the back of her neck. His arms were securely wrapped around her waist as she threaded her fingers through his.
Klinger rounded the corner and came up to her door. Silently he knocked, no answer. He couldn't hear any voices; maybe they weren't there. Again he knocked on the door, still nothing. Slowly he opened the door and walked in, maybe they had gotten into another fight and the captain had already left. Maybe the major was sleeping. Klinger walked over to the bed, she was sleeping. He was about to shake her shoulder when suddenly he realized she wasn't alone.
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I'm sorry this took a while. I was really busy with school. Please review. I would really appreciate it. The more reviews, the quicker I'll be able to get the next chapter out.