Author's Notes: Whoa! A long one, this. Also mightily late. But finally
some yaoitic business. And Tatsumi, yay! Tell me how you like it, I sure
had fun writing it. :)
Chapter Nine: Pulse
I wake up, suddenly, as if to the sharp shrill of an alarm clock. My eyes open easily, and every muscle in my body feels well-rested and just waiting to be used. A good night's sleep. Rare treat, but it does wonders.
I sit up and observe the twilight and silence surrounding me. I'm wide awake, but all the world seems to be still sleeping. Curtains have been drawn over the window and it's still dark, the sun hasn't risen yet. Still, there is a soft blue light in the room that paints it in night time colours. I can see dust dancing slowly in the air, as sleepily as the rest of the world. I look around to see where the light is coming from, and see the laptop on the table. A plain, blue screensaver is running. Tsuzuki is slumped over the keyboard, sound asleep. Watari is nowhere to be seen.
I stand up, stretch my arms a little and idly wish I had a change of clothes. I don't feel dirty, not really, but could use something fresh. Too much digging around dead people, or something of the kind... I wonder what day - or night - this is. The last few days blur in my mind until they're just one surrealistic mess of a ghost hunt. Too much at the same time; mind can't keep up. Oh well, it can wait. First things first.
I'm starving. Tsuzuki said something about food, I recall. A minute of rummaging through the plastic bags that Watari and Tsuzuki have left lying around, and I'm rewarded with a curry bread, unopened can of Pokari and a large collection of sweets of various kinds. The empty containers indicate that there has been at least half as much, before Tsuzuki ate them for his dinner, most likely.
Once I've eaten, I collect all the rubbish in one of the bags and put it in the corner. The room immediately seems bigger. I nod approvingly, and then start wondering where Watari might have gone. Knowing him, he should have at least left a note somewhere.
I walk over to the table, making myself as silent as possible. I'm good at being silent, at that. I peek over Tsuzuki's shoulder; no notes left on the table. Wait a second, this is Watari, who hasn't written a single line by hand ever since he got his hands on a computer... I reach over and move the cursor a little. There's a Word document that looks unfinished; the sentence ends in a series of random letters, indicating that Tsuzuki fell asleep writing. But Notepad is also open, and there's the note I was looking for.
"Tsuzuki," it reads, "I'm off! Once you're finished with the report, send it over to kachou and get some sleep. Tomorrow Tatsumi wants you at Professor Harvey's place around noon. I'm all out of owl food, so I'll head to the office before I get my eyes clawed out! See you at Harvey's! -W
P.S. If Hisoka is still asleep at noon, don't wake him up. Tatsumi hinted that we might need his powers again later on. We don't want to exhaust him, now do we? _^"
What am I... a rechargeable battery?
Well, all in all, it's a relief to find that our duties are getting closer to the end. The case is practically over anyway, we've got the ghosts pinned down - one banished, one identified. Nothing to worry about; from now on it's just paperwork.
Tsuzuki murmurs in his sleep, and I instinctively glance at him, but he slumbers on. I look at the computer clock; 6:42. It's not so early it's ungodly, so I might as well wake him up. He needs to finish the report, anyway, and since Tsuzuki has never quite mastered typing, it'll take hours, I bet. I seem to remember him once commenting that handwriting is going out of fashion for no reason. Not, of course, that I would believe him to be any more productive with pen and paper than he is with word processor.
I nudge him. "Tsuzuki."
He says, "Mmmhh," nuzzles closer to the keyboard (typing "kleerq,;99ooooo:y8" at the end of his report) and sleeps on.
I grab his tie and yank. "Tsuzuki! Wake up!"
That gives me his attention at last, and his heavy-lidded eyes focus vaguely on me. "'M 'wake... lay off, Watari..." He forces his eyes open all the way. "Hisoka," he corrects himself, sleepy smile spreading on his face as he straightens his back. "Thought it was Watari. 'Morning. What time is it?"
"Almost seven," I inform him.
"In the morning?"
I nod.
Tsuzuki rakes back his tousled hair and sighs. "No one's awake at this hour."
"Half of Japan is," I point out. "I just thought I'd give you a chance to finish up your report before we have to get going. But we still have plenty of time, so you should have time for a nap, if you're still tired. Watari wrote he'll meet us at twelve o'clock."
"Hm. I guess I would prefer a futon to sleep on, at that," Tsuzuki admits with a small yawn. He scrambles on his feet, straightens his rumpled shirt. "So Watari's gone? Did he leave anything for breakfast?"
I walk over to the oshiire to take out another futon. "Breakfast's your favourite: some mochi, candy, and cookies. I ate the rest of the real food."
"But cookies are not breakfast, they're for afternoon snacks," Tsuzuki cheerfully argues. I can hear the grin in his voice, even though I can't see him at the moment over the huge mattress.
"No no no no, I can get them - here, let me-"
Tsuzuki comes to my aid, and together we spread out the futon for him. I sit down on my own, about a meter away.
"It looks more comfortable than mine," I comment tonelessly.
Tsuzuki glances up at me. A simple look, nothing to it. He doesn't even smile and crack a joke like I half expect him to. Just... looks at me. And suddenly I'm aware of a strange feeling crackling in the air between us, something warm and yet able to make me shiver. I wonder if I'm still half- asleep, imagining things, mistaking reality for some fuzzy part of a forgotten dream. But what actually is out of the ordinary? What is it that makes me feel so conscious about him, and myself? There is no new look on Tsuzuki's face, just the features I know so well. His voice, too, is Tsuzuki's voice, nothing more, nothing less.
No coldness there of any kind.
"You can have it if you want," he says softly.
I look down and away, attempting to break the strange connection. The air is heavy with unsaid words, hidden meaning. No, not only hidden; crypt- written, locked off, forgotten. I'm confused. Am I afraid, or... excited?
"'S alright," I manage to mutter. I feel I might be blushing. I'm *not* thinking what I'm thinking. It was a simple question, nothing more. What's wrong with me?
A moment of heavy silence. It doesn't feel particularly awkward, just impossible to break. Time crawls by, and I just stare at the futon, trying to get a hold of myself.
"Hisoka," a solemn voice calls, interrupting my reverie. For a while, I don't realize it's Tsuzuki speaking. My head snaps up; the voice came from above. Tsuzuki has gotten up and is standing a few steps away with his side to me, his gaze fixed on the wall behind me. His other hand is on his hip. He looks strange in the pale light; foreign and adult. This is one of the rare times when I've looked at Tsuzuki and realized that he's older than me by nearly a century. His eyes are so serious they're almost grim. I think they appear that way because Tsuzuki always has some kind of sparkle in his eyes, something playful that makes it so difficult to take him seriously at times.
"What is it?" I ask him.
"Um. I think we need to talk."
Great, that's *just* what I wanted you to say, something that tells me nothing. Frustration builds up inside me; I force it down before snapping at Tsuzuki as usual. He might take it seriously, from the way he looks right now.
He gives me a sideways glance. "Hisoka? You okay?"
I nod; I seem to have forgotten how to speak Japanese.
"Look, if you're still tired, just tell me, okay? You've been through a lot lately. The last thing I want is -"
"And you haven't?" I can't help it; my voice cracks a little when I finally speak up. Then the words just roll off my tongue. "I've slept well, and eaten, and I'm perfectly fine! This happens to be my job! I'm not made of fucking glass!"
Tsuzuki raises his eyebrows and looks taken aback. Soon his surprised face turns amused, and he bites back a smile.
"Are you laughing at me?" I grumble.
On cue, he laughs. "Well, that just wasn't quite what I thought you'd say. You'll excuse me for being born in 1900."
My automatic response is, "Oyaji."
"Oh, shut up before I take away your allowance, kiddo." He saunters over to my futon, a good-natured grin on his face, and casually slumps down next to me. I instinctively make some more space between us. Tsuzuki doesn't mind people invading his personal space, so he happily invades others', without giving it a second thought. Well, this is better than before, I suppose. At least the atmosphere's relaxed now. But the strange mixture of fear and excitement hasn't gone anywhere.
"So." He is still smiling at me. "I'll take your word for it, then. You're fine. You're snapping at me as usual."
I don't think he meant to actually say that last bit aloud. He looks away for a second, trying to find some way to explain himself out of it. But the comment has already hit me right between my eyes, and I frown. I draw my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs.
"I just don't *get* you. It's like you're constantly trying to make up for something, concerning yourself with other people all the time. Actually, you've been getting more and more like it recently! What happened to what you said to me when we were made partners - that it's strictly business, that we need to get along because of work, nothing more?"
Tsuzuki seems to find my futon very interesting, too. He laughs nervously. "Yes, well, back then I thought it needed to be said. You looked like you were ready to claw my eyes out, and that's not awfully productive for teamwork, you know? And work has always come first, hasn't it?" He pauses for just a second, and then goes on, in a slightly lower tone. "I think I actually was telling that more to myself than to you."
"You're weird." I surprise myself by saying this, then immediately regret it. That wasn't what I meant to say, I meant -
"Oh, that's assertive," Tsuzuki counters before I get a chance to explain. "Do you call our line of work normal? Something I learned along the years is that you have to get a little crazy to put up with all this death."
That was bitterer than anything I've ever heard him say. I glance at him; he's staring into space, and the smile on his face has died off.
"Tsuzuki? That's not like you."
He sighs. "Sorry. I didn't mean to get dramatic. What I mean is - well, our lives are full of darkness, full of death, already. I don't mean just us shinigami, but ordinary humans, too. This latest case is a perfect example. It's a harsh world. Why add to the pile and go moping about? The least we can do is to try to care for each other."
Yes, he has a point. But what is he getting at? I decide to challenge him to finish what he has begun.
"So, basically you're saying that mothering me is going to make the world a better place."
Tsuzuki looks embarrassed for a second, then laughs. "You know what I mean, Hisoka!"
I grant him a friendly look; go on. He goes serious all of a sudden.
"I know it's kind of a weird philosophy, but it's the only thing that has kept me on the track many times. I can't blame you if you think I'm out of my mind, really. They used to tell me so, and I told myself the same countless times, and that was *before* I died."
"Who's they?" I can't help asking. "You're not out of your mind, that's not what I said. Why would anyone think that?"
Tsuzuki looks uncomfortable. "W-well... just something that people didn't think was very proper. This thing about my tastes that could get you to a mad house in those times..."
"What, the obsessed cake gobbler section?"
Stop hinting, Tsuzuki dammit, and tell me something.
Tsuzuki doesn't give any warning before starting to ruffle my hair. I wince at the touch, but relax once I realize he's only being playful. I don't like to admit it, but for a second I actually think he's going to grab my hair and throw me down and clutch my throat...
"Will you just let me finish one sentence without turning it into a joke, huh?" His voice is filled with laughter. "I'm trying to be serious here!"
"You're not doing so well at it!" I retort, and try to dodge away.
"And *you're* certainly not making it any easier!" Tsuzuki tries to pout, which is hard to do when you're chuckling. He finally lets my hair be, although he makes a fake attempt to start it over again. I jump off the futon, and he grins.
"So you're scared of me now?"
He's a tease. For once, it doesn't irritate me; after all, that is practically an inside joke. He knows that I *am* wary of him, wary of anything that would hint at the ghost's return. It's a dark kind of humor that comes out of our cases, our daily life. Tsuzuki is right, the presence of death lingers in the air, whatever we do. The victims are dead, the culprits are dead, we are dead. What can you expect?
I shiver. Cold thoughts make you feel cold. It's like a wind blowing through the graveyard. I look up at Tsuzuki. It's an instant reflex; make me feel warm, you're good at it. He's now opposite of me, sitting on the futon with his legs stretched out, and I'm crouching on the floor, as if I'm not quite sure whether to stand up and leave or not.
"Isn't it funny that after dying... you could still be afraid of death?" My voice is strained to my own ears. I don't really care for an answer. I just need a reason to look at him.
The morning sun has invaded the room and painted it in yellow hues. The light makes everything look so warm and soft. Tsuzuki seems to have noticed, as well. His eyes are glossed over, and he seems to enjoy the serene moment.
This is not the right time to be discussing death. And yet, we are, neither of us finding it strange in any way.
"But, Hisoka, that is the proof that even after death, there is life. For us, anyway. I wouldn't want to guess whether Professor Harvey's wife might agree." He smiles. It's an everything-will-be-alright -smile. "This might be a somewhat grim existence, but it is our life, and that won't change."
"Then why is it so cold?" Am I actually saying it out loud? "There's so much death and pain and despair and we're just supposed to take it on the chin because it's all the life we get? What the hell is that supposed to mean, I didn't become a shinigami to get another miserable attempt of a life!"
It's all so damn unfair.
"Now, now, Hisoka. How am I supposed to answer that, huh?"
Tsuzuki sounds tired. He sighs. I look at him hesitantly, and find a stern look on his face.
"Come here."
"What?" I ask stupidly.
"I'll try and give you the only answer I've got." And he grabs my arm, pulling me over to him. During these last two days he seems to have totally forgotten that I hate being touched, something he's respected dutifully ever since I made it clear to him. I think I've somehow forgotten too. I just can't find it in me to be uncomfortable when he pulls me close, wrapping one hand firmly around my shoulders. It's such an honest embrace. I almost feel ashamed for still keeping up my barriers when he's being so open with me. But it's a force of habit; it's become much more difficult for me to lower my shields than to keep them up. Even in times like this, when there's nothing to fear...
And yet I'm reminded of the last time Tsuzuki held me like this, and I found it wasn't him at all in the end. I swallow; I'm suspicious. My face is pressed into Tsuzuki's shirt, and I try to pull apart enough to see his face.
His eyes...
But Tsuzuki's grip on my shoulder grows stronger. He prevents me from seeing anything but his shirt and neck. I can feel his breath in my hair; his voice is low and somewhat husky.
"No, Hisoka, I know what's going through your mind right now, but just listen to me. I know what you've had to go through, and I know it's hard. When there's too much death in your life, just focus on living things, okay? Focus on - something - something that won't go away, something that cares. If you only can, focus on me."
My heart is hammering. It's the mix of excitement and fear, grown to almost its full potential. My barriers are crackling. Tsuzuki's voice is even lower as he continues.
"I've tried to make it good for you, be a friend that you so obviously needed. Sometimes I feel it's not working, that you don't even want me to. Is that it, Hisoka? Tell me, dammit, is it all worth it or not?"
I'm honestly scared now; he's never talked to me like this. I've never heard him be so serious about anything. He's never demanded anything from me before.
I struggle against his grip; he stays firm. No - this was a mistake - I'm in trouble - if only I could see his eyes, see the cold hate there and know for sure -
"No you won't," he says to my hair, something desperate in his voice. "Trust me, Hisoka, trust me as I say this: you're special to me, not as a partner, not as a friend, and I can't hide behind those roles anymore. If all I am to you is a nuisance of a partner who meddles in your affairs, then tell me now, because I'm not letting go until I hear your answer."
"Tsuzuki, you're scaring me," I hear myself say, whimpering like a child in distress. It is too much.
"Yes." His voice grows softer, gentler. His grip on my shoulders turns so light it's tentative. "I'm scaring myself," Tsuzuki says. He sounds so lost that I feel my chest tighten. Oh... Tsuzuki. How could I suspect it to be someone else? All of a sudden, even the idea seems ridiculous. I feel Tsuzuki's presence all around me; I've never been so aware of it before. Before I realize what I'm doing, I lift up my arms and wrap them around his chest. It seems the only thing I can do.
I can feel him take in a sharp breath. I move a little from my awkward position, and find myself strangling Tsuzuki's thighs. This is comfortable. I could just wrap myself around him, bury myself in this sweetness that surrounds him.
I feel a hand entwining in my hair, gently turning my head up. As soon as I see his face, it becomes clear to me what he meant by 'special'. It's written there in his warm, amethyst eyes. The look on his face is apologetic. "Please," he says, and as if trying to catch the word back, he leans forward, and presses his mouth against mine.
For a horribly awkward moment, I don't know what to do. I freeze, my whole body tensing up. Then, slowly, I find things to focus on - the shape of Tsuzuki's lips, his hand traveling down my spine, the other snaking around my waist to hold me closer... And yes, I want to be closer to him, as close as I can.
As I wriggle closer, he pulls away a little, enough for the tips of our noses to touch. No, don't stop - not yet - I'm finally catching on... I release my arms from around his chest and reach up to catch his head with both hands, to crush those hungry lips back to mine. I want to answer that challenge.
And a worthy challenge it is. Tsuzuki clings onto me tightly, his arms wrapping around me and pulling me against him until I'm so close that I'm almost melting into him... It's become very warm all of a sudden, and there is something hot stirring inside me, a flame kindled by the feel of Tsuzuki's mouth against mine. I didn't know a kiss could be so - so overwhelming, I didn't know how much it could make me hungry for more. The need to have more is insistent enough to almost make me forget my usual carefulness on uncharted territories. I'm not sure what I'm doing, but I want to taste more of that sweet mouth, so if I'll just open my mouth a bit more and -
A small, surprised sound escapes me as Tsuzuki's tongue slips in my mouth and searches mine. Yes, this was what I was looking for, this and more... I grab his hair and let the world turn into a hot haze, where I can only feel Tsuzuki's mouth and Tsuzuki's body against mine. Oh, it's a delicious feeling, and I readily give into it, hungrily searching for more. I move blindly, trying to be closer than close, and Tsuzuki's hands are everywhere at once, making me enveloped in his presence. My head is spinning - Tsuzuki's hands are moving downwards, they're on my hips, the touch making me all the more conscious of the heat and hardness between my legs...
Tsuzuki's mouth leaves mine, not abruptly, but brings some of my sense back to me once I open my eyes again. I vaguely realize I should be embarrassed. Then I look at Tsuzuki and forget all about it. His chocolate brown hair is tousled from my hands and gives his face a wildered look. His eyes are a deeper shade of purple, wide and amazed. For an endless second, he stares at me in unbelief, breathing heavily. Then he closes his mouth and smiles, tentatively at first, then so wide that his eyes crinkle. He looks so - happy.
"I - I guess you're not scared anymore," I say, my voice hoarse, just to say something. That was a really stupid thing to say, I realize, and feel my face grow hotter as Tsuzuki keeps looking at me.
Tsuzuki laughs a clear, happy laugh that shatters my brief discomfort. He lets go of me, his hands coming up to caress my face, tuck back my hair. He smiles as his eyes find mine, and my heart skips a beat. He's so gentle, and warm, and so achingly beautiful...
I swallow hard, hardly daring to breathe.
"I'm sorry for coming on so strong," he whispers, "I just felt I couldn't hold it back anymore. You're - you drive me absolutely *crazy* sometimes, you know that?"
His eyes glint in the old, playful way. He inches closer, his mouth barely a thread away from mine.
"I guess you would know, at that."
Oddly enough, through the thick emotion that hangs in the air, I finally remember to be embarrassed about what we just did. Feeling my cheeks burn, I turn my face away and move back a little.
Tsuzuki kisses my cheek. "What is it? Second thoughts?"
"No, I - I just never -"
My search for words comes to an end as our mouths find each other again. I have no idea which one of us initiated it, but I welcome the kiss eagerly. It takes so little - the feeling when the tips of our tongues meet, the taste of his mouth - to make the heat return. I shudder as Tsuzuki's mouth leaves mine, but instead of backing away, he kisses me just below my lower lip, then my chin, then under it...
I can't help a low groan at the sensation of Tsuzuki's wet mouth on my throat. I throw my head back, giving him better access, but he's painfully slow, carefully searching for the right spots and making my heart beat faster and faster. He flickers his tongue against a vein, against my raging pulse, and I squirm against him, seeking release from the teasing touch.
Then I suddenly hear a loud knock, and everything seems to come to a screeching halt. Tsuzuki straightens his back, and our eyes dart at the door. Shit! I start scrambling up, desperately trying to calm myself - it's always worked before, but of course, not now.
"Tsuzuki-san? Are you awake?" calls a voice behind the door. It's Tatsumi. And it sounds like he has Watari with him, I can hear him say something. Just perfect!
Tsuzuki is trying to straighten himself out, too. As we come apart and he quickly gets on his unsure feet, I can't help noticing the bulge in his black pants, although he's trying to fix his shirt to cover it. I chide myself for making matters worse and wish I was wearing black pants, too, instead of my now uncomfortably tight jeans.
"Um, hold on a second, Tatsumi, Hisoka's changing his clothes," Tsuzuki replies hastily.
Well, I have to congratulate Tsuzuki on not claiming that *he* was changing his clothes. He's never been shy of changing in front of anybody, but he knows that Tatsumi knows I'm a different matter. Still, it's the oldest fake excuse in the book.
"Tsuzuki," I frantically whisper, "I don't have any change clothes! Watari'll know we're lying!"
"I have, in the suitcase," he replies, in an equally low voice.
"I'm not wearing *your* shirt!"
But Tsuzuki has already opened the suitcase, and throws me a white shirt that is identical to the one he's wearing.
"Look, I can't, it's too big for me and they know I never wear anything but t-shirts..."
"Hush, roll up the sleeves and it'll be fine!"
I really have no choice, so I quickly pull off my t-shirt and put on the white shirt, with Tsuzuki fussing about trying to help and just making it take longer. As I tuck the ends of the shirt loosely in my jeans and start rolling up the sleeves, Tsuzuki calls to Tatsumi, "Okay, come on in."
Tatsumi opens the door, and stops to give the room a brief check. Watari bursts in after him.
"Oh, good, you're awake!" he says, beaming. "I was afraid of waking you up. They wanted to see the death report of Mrs. Harvey, you have it with you, don't you, Tsuzuki?"
Three more people enter the room; I slump down on the futon and make myself as small and unnoticeable as possible. One of them is Allendorf; after him comes a blond, serious woman in a dark green suit, and the last, a young shinigami I remember seeing talking with Watari sometimes in the lab, closes the door after him.
Tsuzuki clears his throat. I can only see his back, but I can tell he is still a little out of breath, too.
"Yes, I have it right here, hold on a moment." He grouches down to pick up a file from the suitcase, and gives me a quick, secret glance before turning to give the file to Watari. Tatsumi is talking with Allendorf in a low voice. The young shinigami - a tall, lanky man with short black hair and very lively eyes, looks at Tsuzuki curiously. I've never worked with him, but he seems to have heard of us. I squirm a little, uncomfortable.
Watari looks over a few pages. "Well, Exley-san, why don't you look at this - it really doesn't say anything about the throat, so I'm positive that -"
The woman in the green suit takes the file and examines it, her bright red lips tight. "Hexley, if you don't mind. And yes, it doesn't, but that only proves my point - we need the solid proof, and that's where I come in."
Watari shakes his head, frowning.
I can't help my curiousity, so I ask, "What's going on?"
Tatsumi gives me a brief glance. "Hexley-san here is not convinced that whatever possessed Tsuzuki was, indeed, Professor Harvey's wife. She says we might me following a wrong lead."
"What?" I stare at him, then at the woman, who sighs a little, shifting her weight to her other foot. "I can't believe this! Why are you arguing about something like that when the killer is still out there? Look, I was there, I saw the whole thing, and I swear -"
"Yes, yes, Kurosaki-kun, we know," Tatsumi patiently says. "In any case, we can't afford to have loose ends on a case like this, so we had to check. But I'm afraid you have not been introduced to everybody."
He turns to Allendorf, who seems to be deep in thought. "Allendorf-sensei, you've met them, haven't you? Well then, Hexley-san, these are Tsuzuki-san and Kurosaki-kun from the summoning department, the ones mentioned in the memo, and over there is Morino-kun from the medical wing. He's here as a backup, since it seems this case called for extra medical attention."
Tatsumi looks at Tsuzuki as he says that, a very intense look that almost makes me uncomfortable in its intimacy, especially since Tsuzuki looks back and seems to be aware of it, too.
Morino gives a brisk bow to Allendorf and Hexley. "Nice to meet you! I'm honoured to have this chance to work with the Western department. Though, three on three seems only fair, doesn't it?"
He laughs, but nobody joins his laughter, instead everybody seems baffled.
"Excuse me?" Hexley says, frowning again.
Morino smiles nervously, finding everybody's eyes on him. "Well, there are three of us shinigami currently officially on the case - that's excluding Watari-san and Tatsumi-san who are merely offering their help. And three of you - but the charming third member of your party isn't back yet, I see." He looks around searchingly.
Everybody's dead serious all of a sudden. Allendorf raises his voice. "Morino-kun, there are no other Western Department employees currently on the case. Who did you see?"
Morino frowns worriedly. "Why, I didn't catch her name - but she was in the corridor while we were waiting to get in, standing really quietly behind you. A lovely young lady, blond hair, although he looked awfully upset - angry even. She went along the corridor when we stepped in, I assumed she was going to the bathroom or something -"
My blood has turned to ice water in my veins. I search for Tsuzuki's eyes, and he turns quickly and looks at me, the same look of horror on his face.
"Rachel Clifford," I say aloud.
Watari looks at Tatsumi. "It's the ghost of the killer. What is she doing here?"
Tatsumi puts his briefcase on the table and takes charge. "Allendorf- sensei, you come with me. Morino-kun, which way did she go? Left? All right, so she could still be in the building. Watari-san, check the entrance hall; Hexley-san, you go with him and keep your eyes open. Tsuzuki- san, you and Kurosaki-kun check out the rest of the rooms. Morino-kun, go with them."
Watari and Hexley run out of the room. Allendorf takes a leather-covered book out of his pocket and starts leafing through it frantically. Tatsumi sees that everybody's ready, and gives final instructions from the doorway.
"If anyone except me and Allendorf-sensei encounter her, give immediate sign to us and don't do anything until we arrive. Once you've checked the building, go to the entrance hall."
Then he and Allendorf hastily leave the room.
"Let's start in the kitchen, it's nearest," I say, giving Tsuzuki and Morino a look. Morino nods and runs along, almost eagerly. I follow close behind, but stop for long enough to grab Tsuzuki's hand. It's warm in my hand, and that's how I plan to keep it. No ghost is going to take out Tsuzuki's sweet warmth ever again - because now it belongs to me.
Chapter Nine: Pulse
I wake up, suddenly, as if to the sharp shrill of an alarm clock. My eyes open easily, and every muscle in my body feels well-rested and just waiting to be used. A good night's sleep. Rare treat, but it does wonders.
I sit up and observe the twilight and silence surrounding me. I'm wide awake, but all the world seems to be still sleeping. Curtains have been drawn over the window and it's still dark, the sun hasn't risen yet. Still, there is a soft blue light in the room that paints it in night time colours. I can see dust dancing slowly in the air, as sleepily as the rest of the world. I look around to see where the light is coming from, and see the laptop on the table. A plain, blue screensaver is running. Tsuzuki is slumped over the keyboard, sound asleep. Watari is nowhere to be seen.
I stand up, stretch my arms a little and idly wish I had a change of clothes. I don't feel dirty, not really, but could use something fresh. Too much digging around dead people, or something of the kind... I wonder what day - or night - this is. The last few days blur in my mind until they're just one surrealistic mess of a ghost hunt. Too much at the same time; mind can't keep up. Oh well, it can wait. First things first.
I'm starving. Tsuzuki said something about food, I recall. A minute of rummaging through the plastic bags that Watari and Tsuzuki have left lying around, and I'm rewarded with a curry bread, unopened can of Pokari and a large collection of sweets of various kinds. The empty containers indicate that there has been at least half as much, before Tsuzuki ate them for his dinner, most likely.
Once I've eaten, I collect all the rubbish in one of the bags and put it in the corner. The room immediately seems bigger. I nod approvingly, and then start wondering where Watari might have gone. Knowing him, he should have at least left a note somewhere.
I walk over to the table, making myself as silent as possible. I'm good at being silent, at that. I peek over Tsuzuki's shoulder; no notes left on the table. Wait a second, this is Watari, who hasn't written a single line by hand ever since he got his hands on a computer... I reach over and move the cursor a little. There's a Word document that looks unfinished; the sentence ends in a series of random letters, indicating that Tsuzuki fell asleep writing. But Notepad is also open, and there's the note I was looking for.
"Tsuzuki," it reads, "I'm off! Once you're finished with the report, send it over to kachou and get some sleep. Tomorrow Tatsumi wants you at Professor Harvey's place around noon. I'm all out of owl food, so I'll head to the office before I get my eyes clawed out! See you at Harvey's! -W
P.S. If Hisoka is still asleep at noon, don't wake him up. Tatsumi hinted that we might need his powers again later on. We don't want to exhaust him, now do we? _^"
What am I... a rechargeable battery?
Well, all in all, it's a relief to find that our duties are getting closer to the end. The case is practically over anyway, we've got the ghosts pinned down - one banished, one identified. Nothing to worry about; from now on it's just paperwork.
Tsuzuki murmurs in his sleep, and I instinctively glance at him, but he slumbers on. I look at the computer clock; 6:42. It's not so early it's ungodly, so I might as well wake him up. He needs to finish the report, anyway, and since Tsuzuki has never quite mastered typing, it'll take hours, I bet. I seem to remember him once commenting that handwriting is going out of fashion for no reason. Not, of course, that I would believe him to be any more productive with pen and paper than he is with word processor.
I nudge him. "Tsuzuki."
He says, "Mmmhh," nuzzles closer to the keyboard (typing "kleerq,;99ooooo:y8" at the end of his report) and sleeps on.
I grab his tie and yank. "Tsuzuki! Wake up!"
That gives me his attention at last, and his heavy-lidded eyes focus vaguely on me. "'M 'wake... lay off, Watari..." He forces his eyes open all the way. "Hisoka," he corrects himself, sleepy smile spreading on his face as he straightens his back. "Thought it was Watari. 'Morning. What time is it?"
"Almost seven," I inform him.
"In the morning?"
I nod.
Tsuzuki rakes back his tousled hair and sighs. "No one's awake at this hour."
"Half of Japan is," I point out. "I just thought I'd give you a chance to finish up your report before we have to get going. But we still have plenty of time, so you should have time for a nap, if you're still tired. Watari wrote he'll meet us at twelve o'clock."
"Hm. I guess I would prefer a futon to sleep on, at that," Tsuzuki admits with a small yawn. He scrambles on his feet, straightens his rumpled shirt. "So Watari's gone? Did he leave anything for breakfast?"
I walk over to the oshiire to take out another futon. "Breakfast's your favourite: some mochi, candy, and cookies. I ate the rest of the real food."
"But cookies are not breakfast, they're for afternoon snacks," Tsuzuki cheerfully argues. I can hear the grin in his voice, even though I can't see him at the moment over the huge mattress.
"No no no no, I can get them - here, let me-"
Tsuzuki comes to my aid, and together we spread out the futon for him. I sit down on my own, about a meter away.
"It looks more comfortable than mine," I comment tonelessly.
Tsuzuki glances up at me. A simple look, nothing to it. He doesn't even smile and crack a joke like I half expect him to. Just... looks at me. And suddenly I'm aware of a strange feeling crackling in the air between us, something warm and yet able to make me shiver. I wonder if I'm still half- asleep, imagining things, mistaking reality for some fuzzy part of a forgotten dream. But what actually is out of the ordinary? What is it that makes me feel so conscious about him, and myself? There is no new look on Tsuzuki's face, just the features I know so well. His voice, too, is Tsuzuki's voice, nothing more, nothing less.
No coldness there of any kind.
"You can have it if you want," he says softly.
I look down and away, attempting to break the strange connection. The air is heavy with unsaid words, hidden meaning. No, not only hidden; crypt- written, locked off, forgotten. I'm confused. Am I afraid, or... excited?
"'S alright," I manage to mutter. I feel I might be blushing. I'm *not* thinking what I'm thinking. It was a simple question, nothing more. What's wrong with me?
A moment of heavy silence. It doesn't feel particularly awkward, just impossible to break. Time crawls by, and I just stare at the futon, trying to get a hold of myself.
"Hisoka," a solemn voice calls, interrupting my reverie. For a while, I don't realize it's Tsuzuki speaking. My head snaps up; the voice came from above. Tsuzuki has gotten up and is standing a few steps away with his side to me, his gaze fixed on the wall behind me. His other hand is on his hip. He looks strange in the pale light; foreign and adult. This is one of the rare times when I've looked at Tsuzuki and realized that he's older than me by nearly a century. His eyes are so serious they're almost grim. I think they appear that way because Tsuzuki always has some kind of sparkle in his eyes, something playful that makes it so difficult to take him seriously at times.
"What is it?" I ask him.
"Um. I think we need to talk."
Great, that's *just* what I wanted you to say, something that tells me nothing. Frustration builds up inside me; I force it down before snapping at Tsuzuki as usual. He might take it seriously, from the way he looks right now.
He gives me a sideways glance. "Hisoka? You okay?"
I nod; I seem to have forgotten how to speak Japanese.
"Look, if you're still tired, just tell me, okay? You've been through a lot lately. The last thing I want is -"
"And you haven't?" I can't help it; my voice cracks a little when I finally speak up. Then the words just roll off my tongue. "I've slept well, and eaten, and I'm perfectly fine! This happens to be my job! I'm not made of fucking glass!"
Tsuzuki raises his eyebrows and looks taken aback. Soon his surprised face turns amused, and he bites back a smile.
"Are you laughing at me?" I grumble.
On cue, he laughs. "Well, that just wasn't quite what I thought you'd say. You'll excuse me for being born in 1900."
My automatic response is, "Oyaji."
"Oh, shut up before I take away your allowance, kiddo." He saunters over to my futon, a good-natured grin on his face, and casually slumps down next to me. I instinctively make some more space between us. Tsuzuki doesn't mind people invading his personal space, so he happily invades others', without giving it a second thought. Well, this is better than before, I suppose. At least the atmosphere's relaxed now. But the strange mixture of fear and excitement hasn't gone anywhere.
"So." He is still smiling at me. "I'll take your word for it, then. You're fine. You're snapping at me as usual."
I don't think he meant to actually say that last bit aloud. He looks away for a second, trying to find some way to explain himself out of it. But the comment has already hit me right between my eyes, and I frown. I draw my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs.
"I just don't *get* you. It's like you're constantly trying to make up for something, concerning yourself with other people all the time. Actually, you've been getting more and more like it recently! What happened to what you said to me when we were made partners - that it's strictly business, that we need to get along because of work, nothing more?"
Tsuzuki seems to find my futon very interesting, too. He laughs nervously. "Yes, well, back then I thought it needed to be said. You looked like you were ready to claw my eyes out, and that's not awfully productive for teamwork, you know? And work has always come first, hasn't it?" He pauses for just a second, and then goes on, in a slightly lower tone. "I think I actually was telling that more to myself than to you."
"You're weird." I surprise myself by saying this, then immediately regret it. That wasn't what I meant to say, I meant -
"Oh, that's assertive," Tsuzuki counters before I get a chance to explain. "Do you call our line of work normal? Something I learned along the years is that you have to get a little crazy to put up with all this death."
That was bitterer than anything I've ever heard him say. I glance at him; he's staring into space, and the smile on his face has died off.
"Tsuzuki? That's not like you."
He sighs. "Sorry. I didn't mean to get dramatic. What I mean is - well, our lives are full of darkness, full of death, already. I don't mean just us shinigami, but ordinary humans, too. This latest case is a perfect example. It's a harsh world. Why add to the pile and go moping about? The least we can do is to try to care for each other."
Yes, he has a point. But what is he getting at? I decide to challenge him to finish what he has begun.
"So, basically you're saying that mothering me is going to make the world a better place."
Tsuzuki looks embarrassed for a second, then laughs. "You know what I mean, Hisoka!"
I grant him a friendly look; go on. He goes serious all of a sudden.
"I know it's kind of a weird philosophy, but it's the only thing that has kept me on the track many times. I can't blame you if you think I'm out of my mind, really. They used to tell me so, and I told myself the same countless times, and that was *before* I died."
"Who's they?" I can't help asking. "You're not out of your mind, that's not what I said. Why would anyone think that?"
Tsuzuki looks uncomfortable. "W-well... just something that people didn't think was very proper. This thing about my tastes that could get you to a mad house in those times..."
"What, the obsessed cake gobbler section?"
Stop hinting, Tsuzuki dammit, and tell me something.
Tsuzuki doesn't give any warning before starting to ruffle my hair. I wince at the touch, but relax once I realize he's only being playful. I don't like to admit it, but for a second I actually think he's going to grab my hair and throw me down and clutch my throat...
"Will you just let me finish one sentence without turning it into a joke, huh?" His voice is filled with laughter. "I'm trying to be serious here!"
"You're not doing so well at it!" I retort, and try to dodge away.
"And *you're* certainly not making it any easier!" Tsuzuki tries to pout, which is hard to do when you're chuckling. He finally lets my hair be, although he makes a fake attempt to start it over again. I jump off the futon, and he grins.
"So you're scared of me now?"
He's a tease. For once, it doesn't irritate me; after all, that is practically an inside joke. He knows that I *am* wary of him, wary of anything that would hint at the ghost's return. It's a dark kind of humor that comes out of our cases, our daily life. Tsuzuki is right, the presence of death lingers in the air, whatever we do. The victims are dead, the culprits are dead, we are dead. What can you expect?
I shiver. Cold thoughts make you feel cold. It's like a wind blowing through the graveyard. I look up at Tsuzuki. It's an instant reflex; make me feel warm, you're good at it. He's now opposite of me, sitting on the futon with his legs stretched out, and I'm crouching on the floor, as if I'm not quite sure whether to stand up and leave or not.
"Isn't it funny that after dying... you could still be afraid of death?" My voice is strained to my own ears. I don't really care for an answer. I just need a reason to look at him.
The morning sun has invaded the room and painted it in yellow hues. The light makes everything look so warm and soft. Tsuzuki seems to have noticed, as well. His eyes are glossed over, and he seems to enjoy the serene moment.
This is not the right time to be discussing death. And yet, we are, neither of us finding it strange in any way.
"But, Hisoka, that is the proof that even after death, there is life. For us, anyway. I wouldn't want to guess whether Professor Harvey's wife might agree." He smiles. It's an everything-will-be-alright -smile. "This might be a somewhat grim existence, but it is our life, and that won't change."
"Then why is it so cold?" Am I actually saying it out loud? "There's so much death and pain and despair and we're just supposed to take it on the chin because it's all the life we get? What the hell is that supposed to mean, I didn't become a shinigami to get another miserable attempt of a life!"
It's all so damn unfair.
"Now, now, Hisoka. How am I supposed to answer that, huh?"
Tsuzuki sounds tired. He sighs. I look at him hesitantly, and find a stern look on his face.
"Come here."
"What?" I ask stupidly.
"I'll try and give you the only answer I've got." And he grabs my arm, pulling me over to him. During these last two days he seems to have totally forgotten that I hate being touched, something he's respected dutifully ever since I made it clear to him. I think I've somehow forgotten too. I just can't find it in me to be uncomfortable when he pulls me close, wrapping one hand firmly around my shoulders. It's such an honest embrace. I almost feel ashamed for still keeping up my barriers when he's being so open with me. But it's a force of habit; it's become much more difficult for me to lower my shields than to keep them up. Even in times like this, when there's nothing to fear...
And yet I'm reminded of the last time Tsuzuki held me like this, and I found it wasn't him at all in the end. I swallow; I'm suspicious. My face is pressed into Tsuzuki's shirt, and I try to pull apart enough to see his face.
His eyes...
But Tsuzuki's grip on my shoulder grows stronger. He prevents me from seeing anything but his shirt and neck. I can feel his breath in my hair; his voice is low and somewhat husky.
"No, Hisoka, I know what's going through your mind right now, but just listen to me. I know what you've had to go through, and I know it's hard. When there's too much death in your life, just focus on living things, okay? Focus on - something - something that won't go away, something that cares. If you only can, focus on me."
My heart is hammering. It's the mix of excitement and fear, grown to almost its full potential. My barriers are crackling. Tsuzuki's voice is even lower as he continues.
"I've tried to make it good for you, be a friend that you so obviously needed. Sometimes I feel it's not working, that you don't even want me to. Is that it, Hisoka? Tell me, dammit, is it all worth it or not?"
I'm honestly scared now; he's never talked to me like this. I've never heard him be so serious about anything. He's never demanded anything from me before.
I struggle against his grip; he stays firm. No - this was a mistake - I'm in trouble - if only I could see his eyes, see the cold hate there and know for sure -
"No you won't," he says to my hair, something desperate in his voice. "Trust me, Hisoka, trust me as I say this: you're special to me, not as a partner, not as a friend, and I can't hide behind those roles anymore. If all I am to you is a nuisance of a partner who meddles in your affairs, then tell me now, because I'm not letting go until I hear your answer."
"Tsuzuki, you're scaring me," I hear myself say, whimpering like a child in distress. It is too much.
"Yes." His voice grows softer, gentler. His grip on my shoulders turns so light it's tentative. "I'm scaring myself," Tsuzuki says. He sounds so lost that I feel my chest tighten. Oh... Tsuzuki. How could I suspect it to be someone else? All of a sudden, even the idea seems ridiculous. I feel Tsuzuki's presence all around me; I've never been so aware of it before. Before I realize what I'm doing, I lift up my arms and wrap them around his chest. It seems the only thing I can do.
I can feel him take in a sharp breath. I move a little from my awkward position, and find myself strangling Tsuzuki's thighs. This is comfortable. I could just wrap myself around him, bury myself in this sweetness that surrounds him.
I feel a hand entwining in my hair, gently turning my head up. As soon as I see his face, it becomes clear to me what he meant by 'special'. It's written there in his warm, amethyst eyes. The look on his face is apologetic. "Please," he says, and as if trying to catch the word back, he leans forward, and presses his mouth against mine.
For a horribly awkward moment, I don't know what to do. I freeze, my whole body tensing up. Then, slowly, I find things to focus on - the shape of Tsuzuki's lips, his hand traveling down my spine, the other snaking around my waist to hold me closer... And yes, I want to be closer to him, as close as I can.
As I wriggle closer, he pulls away a little, enough for the tips of our noses to touch. No, don't stop - not yet - I'm finally catching on... I release my arms from around his chest and reach up to catch his head with both hands, to crush those hungry lips back to mine. I want to answer that challenge.
And a worthy challenge it is. Tsuzuki clings onto me tightly, his arms wrapping around me and pulling me against him until I'm so close that I'm almost melting into him... It's become very warm all of a sudden, and there is something hot stirring inside me, a flame kindled by the feel of Tsuzuki's mouth against mine. I didn't know a kiss could be so - so overwhelming, I didn't know how much it could make me hungry for more. The need to have more is insistent enough to almost make me forget my usual carefulness on uncharted territories. I'm not sure what I'm doing, but I want to taste more of that sweet mouth, so if I'll just open my mouth a bit more and -
A small, surprised sound escapes me as Tsuzuki's tongue slips in my mouth and searches mine. Yes, this was what I was looking for, this and more... I grab his hair and let the world turn into a hot haze, where I can only feel Tsuzuki's mouth and Tsuzuki's body against mine. Oh, it's a delicious feeling, and I readily give into it, hungrily searching for more. I move blindly, trying to be closer than close, and Tsuzuki's hands are everywhere at once, making me enveloped in his presence. My head is spinning - Tsuzuki's hands are moving downwards, they're on my hips, the touch making me all the more conscious of the heat and hardness between my legs...
Tsuzuki's mouth leaves mine, not abruptly, but brings some of my sense back to me once I open my eyes again. I vaguely realize I should be embarrassed. Then I look at Tsuzuki and forget all about it. His chocolate brown hair is tousled from my hands and gives his face a wildered look. His eyes are a deeper shade of purple, wide and amazed. For an endless second, he stares at me in unbelief, breathing heavily. Then he closes his mouth and smiles, tentatively at first, then so wide that his eyes crinkle. He looks so - happy.
"I - I guess you're not scared anymore," I say, my voice hoarse, just to say something. That was a really stupid thing to say, I realize, and feel my face grow hotter as Tsuzuki keeps looking at me.
Tsuzuki laughs a clear, happy laugh that shatters my brief discomfort. He lets go of me, his hands coming up to caress my face, tuck back my hair. He smiles as his eyes find mine, and my heart skips a beat. He's so gentle, and warm, and so achingly beautiful...
I swallow hard, hardly daring to breathe.
"I'm sorry for coming on so strong," he whispers, "I just felt I couldn't hold it back anymore. You're - you drive me absolutely *crazy* sometimes, you know that?"
His eyes glint in the old, playful way. He inches closer, his mouth barely a thread away from mine.
"I guess you would know, at that."
Oddly enough, through the thick emotion that hangs in the air, I finally remember to be embarrassed about what we just did. Feeling my cheeks burn, I turn my face away and move back a little.
Tsuzuki kisses my cheek. "What is it? Second thoughts?"
"No, I - I just never -"
My search for words comes to an end as our mouths find each other again. I have no idea which one of us initiated it, but I welcome the kiss eagerly. It takes so little - the feeling when the tips of our tongues meet, the taste of his mouth - to make the heat return. I shudder as Tsuzuki's mouth leaves mine, but instead of backing away, he kisses me just below my lower lip, then my chin, then under it...
I can't help a low groan at the sensation of Tsuzuki's wet mouth on my throat. I throw my head back, giving him better access, but he's painfully slow, carefully searching for the right spots and making my heart beat faster and faster. He flickers his tongue against a vein, against my raging pulse, and I squirm against him, seeking release from the teasing touch.
Then I suddenly hear a loud knock, and everything seems to come to a screeching halt. Tsuzuki straightens his back, and our eyes dart at the door. Shit! I start scrambling up, desperately trying to calm myself - it's always worked before, but of course, not now.
"Tsuzuki-san? Are you awake?" calls a voice behind the door. It's Tatsumi. And it sounds like he has Watari with him, I can hear him say something. Just perfect!
Tsuzuki is trying to straighten himself out, too. As we come apart and he quickly gets on his unsure feet, I can't help noticing the bulge in his black pants, although he's trying to fix his shirt to cover it. I chide myself for making matters worse and wish I was wearing black pants, too, instead of my now uncomfortably tight jeans.
"Um, hold on a second, Tatsumi, Hisoka's changing his clothes," Tsuzuki replies hastily.
Well, I have to congratulate Tsuzuki on not claiming that *he* was changing his clothes. He's never been shy of changing in front of anybody, but he knows that Tatsumi knows I'm a different matter. Still, it's the oldest fake excuse in the book.
"Tsuzuki," I frantically whisper, "I don't have any change clothes! Watari'll know we're lying!"
"I have, in the suitcase," he replies, in an equally low voice.
"I'm not wearing *your* shirt!"
But Tsuzuki has already opened the suitcase, and throws me a white shirt that is identical to the one he's wearing.
"Look, I can't, it's too big for me and they know I never wear anything but t-shirts..."
"Hush, roll up the sleeves and it'll be fine!"
I really have no choice, so I quickly pull off my t-shirt and put on the white shirt, with Tsuzuki fussing about trying to help and just making it take longer. As I tuck the ends of the shirt loosely in my jeans and start rolling up the sleeves, Tsuzuki calls to Tatsumi, "Okay, come on in."
Tatsumi opens the door, and stops to give the room a brief check. Watari bursts in after him.
"Oh, good, you're awake!" he says, beaming. "I was afraid of waking you up. They wanted to see the death report of Mrs. Harvey, you have it with you, don't you, Tsuzuki?"
Three more people enter the room; I slump down on the futon and make myself as small and unnoticeable as possible. One of them is Allendorf; after him comes a blond, serious woman in a dark green suit, and the last, a young shinigami I remember seeing talking with Watari sometimes in the lab, closes the door after him.
Tsuzuki clears his throat. I can only see his back, but I can tell he is still a little out of breath, too.
"Yes, I have it right here, hold on a moment." He grouches down to pick up a file from the suitcase, and gives me a quick, secret glance before turning to give the file to Watari. Tatsumi is talking with Allendorf in a low voice. The young shinigami - a tall, lanky man with short black hair and very lively eyes, looks at Tsuzuki curiously. I've never worked with him, but he seems to have heard of us. I squirm a little, uncomfortable.
Watari looks over a few pages. "Well, Exley-san, why don't you look at this - it really doesn't say anything about the throat, so I'm positive that -"
The woman in the green suit takes the file and examines it, her bright red lips tight. "Hexley, if you don't mind. And yes, it doesn't, but that only proves my point - we need the solid proof, and that's where I come in."
Watari shakes his head, frowning.
I can't help my curiousity, so I ask, "What's going on?"
Tatsumi gives me a brief glance. "Hexley-san here is not convinced that whatever possessed Tsuzuki was, indeed, Professor Harvey's wife. She says we might me following a wrong lead."
"What?" I stare at him, then at the woman, who sighs a little, shifting her weight to her other foot. "I can't believe this! Why are you arguing about something like that when the killer is still out there? Look, I was there, I saw the whole thing, and I swear -"
"Yes, yes, Kurosaki-kun, we know," Tatsumi patiently says. "In any case, we can't afford to have loose ends on a case like this, so we had to check. But I'm afraid you have not been introduced to everybody."
He turns to Allendorf, who seems to be deep in thought. "Allendorf-sensei, you've met them, haven't you? Well then, Hexley-san, these are Tsuzuki-san and Kurosaki-kun from the summoning department, the ones mentioned in the memo, and over there is Morino-kun from the medical wing. He's here as a backup, since it seems this case called for extra medical attention."
Tatsumi looks at Tsuzuki as he says that, a very intense look that almost makes me uncomfortable in its intimacy, especially since Tsuzuki looks back and seems to be aware of it, too.
Morino gives a brisk bow to Allendorf and Hexley. "Nice to meet you! I'm honoured to have this chance to work with the Western department. Though, three on three seems only fair, doesn't it?"
He laughs, but nobody joins his laughter, instead everybody seems baffled.
"Excuse me?" Hexley says, frowning again.
Morino smiles nervously, finding everybody's eyes on him. "Well, there are three of us shinigami currently officially on the case - that's excluding Watari-san and Tatsumi-san who are merely offering their help. And three of you - but the charming third member of your party isn't back yet, I see." He looks around searchingly.
Everybody's dead serious all of a sudden. Allendorf raises his voice. "Morino-kun, there are no other Western Department employees currently on the case. Who did you see?"
Morino frowns worriedly. "Why, I didn't catch her name - but she was in the corridor while we were waiting to get in, standing really quietly behind you. A lovely young lady, blond hair, although he looked awfully upset - angry even. She went along the corridor when we stepped in, I assumed she was going to the bathroom or something -"
My blood has turned to ice water in my veins. I search for Tsuzuki's eyes, and he turns quickly and looks at me, the same look of horror on his face.
"Rachel Clifford," I say aloud.
Watari looks at Tatsumi. "It's the ghost of the killer. What is she doing here?"
Tatsumi puts his briefcase on the table and takes charge. "Allendorf- sensei, you come with me. Morino-kun, which way did she go? Left? All right, so she could still be in the building. Watari-san, check the entrance hall; Hexley-san, you go with him and keep your eyes open. Tsuzuki- san, you and Kurosaki-kun check out the rest of the rooms. Morino-kun, go with them."
Watari and Hexley run out of the room. Allendorf takes a leather-covered book out of his pocket and starts leafing through it frantically. Tatsumi sees that everybody's ready, and gives final instructions from the doorway.
"If anyone except me and Allendorf-sensei encounter her, give immediate sign to us and don't do anything until we arrive. Once you've checked the building, go to the entrance hall."
Then he and Allendorf hastily leave the room.
"Let's start in the kitchen, it's nearest," I say, giving Tsuzuki and Morino a look. Morino nods and runs along, almost eagerly. I follow close behind, but stop for long enough to grab Tsuzuki's hand. It's warm in my hand, and that's how I plan to keep it. No ghost is going to take out Tsuzuki's sweet warmth ever again - because now it belongs to me.