Chapter Three: Alive
He sat in his dorm later that night, staring at the wall that had his SeeD scoresheet pinned to it. After so many retries of the test, he had finally, finally made. Barely scraped by, but still made it.
And yet at the same time, in six months after he passed the test, he still hadn't been assigned to a job. It was no secret why, though...Cid very, very rarely sent out just one SeeD. He almost always sent them out in teams...and it was a known fact that no one could stand to get along with him.
He sighed, and despite how much he tried to keep his mind off of it, his thoughts flew back to two years ago, to the year he spent with Ultemecia...How could he have ever let Ultemecia control him like--
BANG!
He jumped, scowling at himself. He should have been more alert, should have been paying attention...not constantly reminiscing over the past. He stared at the door that someone had pounded on, trying to figure out whether someone had just knocked on it to be ignorant or whether someone was really there.
There was another quick knock. He walked over to the door, but didn't open it. He could hear an impatient sigh from outside.
"Geez, Seifer, I know you're in there..." came a voice that was unmistakably Selphie's.
He shook his head, walking back over to his desk and sitting down.
"SEIFER!!!" Another series of rapid fast knocks against his door. I do not feel up to a counseling session. I do not feel up to talking about everything. I do not feel like talking to you, period. Can't you take a hint? I'm obviously not answering the door...
"Uggghhh...Seifer, I know you're in there! I got a message from Headmaster Cid for ya!! Please open the door..."
He jumped up and threw the door open, and even though he knew it was Selphie standing out there, the sight of her out of her school uniform or SeeD uniform somewhat surprised him. Though she wasn't wearing the yellow dress he was so accustomed to seeing her in, she wasn't in any particular uniform either. He wondered what was going on...
"Headmaster Cid wants to see you. Right now. The sooner the better," she grinned. "He told me to deliver the message."
His mind flew back to another time, when they were all so much younger...Selphie had been delivering a message to him too. Maybe some things never change.
"So go see him!" she beamed, finishing her previous thought.
He nodded, rushing past her towards Cid's office with a feeling of excitement and dread in his heart. There could only be two reasons Cid wanted to see him, one being that he got a job and could finally take a vacation from the Garden, and the other...
The other was that, for some reason, Cid planned to kick him out.
He took a deep breath, knocked on Cid's office door, and walked in.
"Ah, hello...Seifer..." Cid nodded. Though he was being polite, it was obvious he wasn't really excited to see him "Have a seat."
He did so, quite nervously and awkwardly.
"As a SeeD, you knew you'd be assigned to various jobs...I'm sending you and another SeeD to Deling City. The leader of your two-person team will hack into Deling City's military system, and bring me back information. I need the two of you to tell me what you find."
"Sir, what are we looking for?
Cid paused, seeming like he didn't really want to trust this information to him.
"...a girl by the name of Seishi...a last name won't be listed...just...figure it out. I didn't really see this as a good assignment for one than person, and I was going to send Selphie Tilmitt alone...she's taken quite a few hacking classes, and has extreme potential in mechanical/technological fields, despite it all...but because of...and, well, I figured it'd be safer to send someone along with her. She specifically requested you."
Why?
"You can meet her in the parking lot," Cid continued. "You'll drive to Balamb, then take the train to Deling City...I'm not sure why, exactly, she's requested you. Maybe your attitude has changed. I certainly hope so. Best of luck. You're dismissed now."
Seifer saluted him, and walked out. Selphie met him halfway, and walked with him to the parking lot.
In silence, strangely. For the first time since she had started hanging out with him, she was silent. She didn't make a single sound the entire way to the parking lot, and he didn't object when she hopped into the driver's seat of the car and started driving.
After a few minutes silence, he finally felt like someone needed to say something. He wasn't sure why...
"Is it true you flew the Ragnarok?"
A trace of a smile crossed her face, as if recalling days that were fun, but still horrible all within themselves...
"Yeah, I did. Zell or Quistis would take over if I got really tired, but I got to fly the majority of the time."
"Bet after flying in that you feel slow driving in a car..."
She frowned, glancing from Seifer to her speedometer. She was driving the speed limit, Seifer noticed, wondering why exactly she was staring at it...
"Seifer, are you telling me I'm driving slow?" she asked slowly, a devilish smile crossing her face. She rolled down the windows, and turned up the hyper-sounding punk rock CD she had put in, winked at Seifer, focused her attention on the road...and to put it quite simply, floored it.
"Whoa, Tilmitt! Slow down!!!"
"BOOYAKA!!! This is GREAT!! I feel so, so...so alive!!!" she gave a cheer and looked to Seifer momentarily. "C'mon, I know you've gotta have some happiness hidden somewhere in ya. Let it all out!! Don't you just feel good right now?! Just, cheer or something!"
He gave her a funny look, wondering exactly what was wrong with Selphie to make her act this way...
"Cheer or somethin', Seifer...y'gotta stop worryin' so much about whether people think you're stupid or somewhat. Just let loose and have fun!"
She was already laughing, though not at him. It was out of pure delight. She looked so...funny, driving like a maniac and laughing like one too that he found himself laughing as well, partially from enjoying the speed at which she was driving and partially because she was just so funny to watch...
"See? Isn't this great?!" she giggled, gripping the wheel.
"Yeah," he laughed, and realized for the first time since Ultemecia...he was actually having fun.
And realized that, despite how hard he had tried to fight off enjoying himself, he was quite disappointed when Selphie pulled into Balamb's Train Station.
"It's a shame everything has to come to an end..." Selphie sighed regretfully, hopping out of the car. She ran a hand through her hair, still smiling from the ride. "...what?" she asked after a moment. What is it?"
He blushed scarlet, realizing after a moment that he had been staring. He stared at the sky, the ground, the train station, anything that wasn't in her general direction. It was just...he hadn't expected her to be so pretty, with her windblown hair sticking out everywhere...
She blinked a few times, but didn't question any farther, handing him a train ticket. She grinned, and ran onto the train. He followed her, and as soon as the door closed behind him, he felt the train begin to move.
He walked into a different section of the train to find Selphie staring out a window, softly singing a song in Japanese.
At one time or another, he'd heard the melody, but didn't interrupt her to ask what it was called. Though he wouldn't have ever guessed it, Selphie had a pretty voice...
She finished that song and started singing about trains, and he finally decided to interrupt her with a question that had been tugging in the back of his mind.
"Why do you like trains so much?"
She blinked a few times, thinking.
"I wanna go to faraway places, see new things, meet new people...this train has the ability to make that fantasy a reality. I felt the same way when I drove the Ragnarok. Like, 'Wow! I can go anywhere I wanna go!' It's just...I dunno...y'know what I mean?"
"That makes sense," he answered.
"I'm glad," she beamed. "'Cuz I don't have an alternative explanation."
"...why'd you request I come with you?" he finally had to ask, after a moment's silence.
She paused, looking for the first time since he'd seen her, slightly uncomfortable.
"Well, I like traveling with my friends."
"Why not your other friends?"
She seemed to consider this.
"...Zell's taking post-SeeD specialization classes or something like that, and isn't doing so well, so I wouldn't wanna distract him from his studies...Quistis feels awkward around me 'cause of Irvine and all...Rinoa isn't a SeeD quite yet…Irvine, well...and I wouldn't bring Squall 'cause Rinoa gets real worried when he's gone and--" she cut off abruptly, hand flying to her mouth. "Oh, Seifer, I--"
"--I don't like her that way anymore. I'm happy she's happy, and that's it."
"Oh, okay," she sighed in relief. "...did...you not wanna come with me?"
He shook his head.
"No, I don't mind being with you."
"Oh, okay," she smiled. "Good."
With that, she turned and went into the cabin SeeD was given. He followed her in, picking up a 'Weapons Monthly' that was lying in the floor, and sat down on the couch.
Selphie fiddled with a box on the wall, sighing.
"Air conditioner won't turn off...hope you're not cold natured," she sighed, brushing a piece of lint off her blue-jeans. She lay down on the opposite end of the couch, curling up and closing her eyes.
He watched her for awhile. She never made it into a deep sleep, and shivered with cold. He walked over to the thermostat, and punched a few buttons, but like Selphie had said, it was broken.
He walked back over to the couch, shrugging off his coat and laying it gently over Selphie. She looked like such a young child, sleeping in a state close to peace...He closed his own eyes, trying to deny a strange feeling arising deep within him...he walked over to the chair across the room, watching her until he, too, fell asleep.
~//~