Chapter Seven: Seishi
He didn't know why, but that morning he found himself tiredly gazing through old yearbooks, making mental notes to himself that next time he planned on trying to remember his entire childhood with Selphie, not to do it so late at night.
He flipped through his classes, looking at how much everyone had changed. This had been a yearbook from before he had even been a SeeD... A picture of the disciplinary committee...there he stood, with Fujin and Raijin. He looked so ignorantly arrogant in that picture that it disgusted him. It was acting so stupid like that that had got him mixed up in the entire Ultemecia mess in the first place...
He turned the page, and saw another picture, this one labeled 'Garden Festival Committee.' Selphie stood alone underneath of it, smiling and giving the camera the 'peace' sign.
Sure, the other people who had faced Ultemecia changed, but it was Selphie who'd changed the most...He stared at the picture, unsure that this was even the same Selphie he knew today. Their personalities were obviously still the same--both seemed so happy and carefree--but their physical appearance was so different...Selphie looked so much healthier in the picture he saw...Though he had once thought that feeling sorry for a person was a completely ridiculous concept, he couldn't help but feel sorry for the girl now...had Ultemecia really done this to her? And he...he had sided with Ultemecia. Had...had he done this too her?
No, he thought to himself. Thinking like this without even knowing whether what he thought was the truth or not was a dumb idea. It'd just lead him to more pain, so to take his mind off of things, he headed to the cafeteria to get breakfast.
"Good morning, Seifer," Selphie commented cheerfully as Seifer sat down across from her, not glancing up from the paper she was reading. "Surprised to see you up this early, after our 3 o'clock conversation last night..."
"I could say the same to you," he laughed.
"Well, I have a good reason," she smiled good-naturedly. "Headmaster Cid needed to talk to me, so I had to get up."
Despite her smile, there was still something bothering her...he didn't know how, but he could somehow tell...
"What's wrong, Selphie?"
She glanced up for the first time, surprised that he had even caught on that there was a problem. She frowned, and handed him the paper she had been reading from.
--Selphie Tilmitt,
It's come to my attention that when I sent you, Zell, and Squall to Esthar a few months ago, you encountered a certain Sorceress Seishi who was trying to gain power and "continue Adel's rule". It's been confirmed that this Seishi is the same one that you searched information on in Galbadia. She is not with Galbadia, and Galbadia was only attacking you and Seifer because you hacked into their system. You need not worry about Galbadian Soldiers, we've already sent our formal apologies to them, and they have no problem with us. Anyway, that's beside the point. The point is that Seishi must be defeated as soon as possible. There's a slight problem, however. I wanted to send my highest-level SeeDs to fight her, which, as you know, are the 5 of you SeeDs that fought Ultemecia. (Rinoa will start at a high level, when she passes her SeeD test, since I know you're wondering, Selphie.) And I would send my highest-level SeeDs, but Squall, Zell, Irvine, and Quistis are on a mission in Centra, and I have no way of contacting them. There's not enough time to wait for them to get back, either. Obviously, Seishi has been slowly planning her 'revenge' for quite a long time now, and we must not waste any time. My next level SeeDs are too low of a level to send on such a mission, so I plan on sending you and Rinoa to defeat her. Now I know Rinoa isn't a SeeD yet, but she's a lot stronger than a good deal of my SeeDs. But then again, there are things about you and Rinoa I must take into consideration, like your problem and also the fact that Rinoa's not a SeeD and then she's a sorceress as well...I don't think it's safe to send just the two of you. But whom else could I send?
Despite the fact that my final SeeD I'm sending along with you has leveled up over the past year or so in the worst way possible, I believe it's safe to say that Seifer is almost at the same level as those of you who faced Ultemecia. So, I'm sending Seifer along. I know he's had trouble with Sorceresses in the past, obviously, so I'm trusting you, Selphie, to make sure he doesn't do anything irrational.
Seishi is currently causing chaos within Esthar. If you could explain the mission to Seifer, I'd appreciate it. You'll leave for Esthar tomorrow. Best of luck, and contact me when you've defeated her. ---Cid Kramer
He folded the paper back up and handed it to her.
"Is he...afraid that I'll side with the sorceress or something?"
Selphie looked slightly uncomfortable.
"I suppose..."
"Well, he's wrong!" Seifer exclaimed, making a few people in the cafeteria turn to look at him. "I only make a dumb mistake once! I've learned my lesson, already!!"
"I know, Seifer, but this is a special case--"
"--you don't trust me either?!" he interrupted.
"Did I ever say that, Seifer? Calm down. Headmaster Cid just knows this isn't gonna be an easy fight. It's even harder because I--I knew Seishi. We were really good friends..."
"What happened?"
"Well, she always had some sort of problem. Everyone mistreated her something awful, and she swore her solemn revenge...she dropped out of the Garden shortly before I came to Balamb."
"You think you can stand to fight her?"
She paused, taking a deep breath.
"You have to think about it like this. Do we spare her and save her life, or let her live to destroy a hundred or more other lives? And if she, say, by some chance, only kills...let's put a minimum of 100 people. Well, those one hundred people have at least 25 people who'll be affected by their death. And those 25 people each have about 10 people who'll be affected by their grief and those 10 people...y'just gotta look at the big picture. It's an awfully hard choice, but it's one we gotta make."
He stared at her in shock for a moment, completely surprised to hear her say something so...so un-Selphie like.
"I've come to learn too much about life," she sighed. "It makes me appreciate it anymore, but it also makes it harder for me to take the life of anyone or anything...but sometimes, we have no choice."
She sighed, then continued,
"I hope we can do this. I know he wanted Rinoa to come, but she doesn't feel very good so she won't be able to fight well...and she's afraid of getting possessed too, so it's just me and you up against her."
He felt like he should say something to make her feel better, but couldn't find the words...
"I'm so sorry, Seifer...I didn't want you to have to fight her..."
He didn't understand...why not? Why was it such a big deal?
"I'm heading to the library, if you have any questions about the mission."
He watched her walk off sadly, shrouded in a misery that can only be caused when you realize you have to kill one of your best friends. He wanted to make her feel better, wanted to say whatever it took to make her smile....
And although he worried about her, he felt somewhat selfish, because all of his own unanswered questions were pulling at his heart too, and more than anything, he just wanted everything to go back to the way it once was...
Or did he? If things went back to the way they once were, he wouldn't be friends with Selphie...
Life was full of sacrifices one was forced to make. The only question was how many sacrifices would he have to make to finally be able to enjoy life?
~//~