A/N: Have since the last chapter finished GoF for the second time and well… You know the "bear with me" note on the first chapter. Applies now more than everJ. Chapter title? *hides in shame*

But no matter, here's the chapter:

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Chapter 7 – Life goes on

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School started again the following Monday, but Hogwarts was hardly its same old self. The students seemed deeply affected by the attack, most of them in a state of shock. The Slytherins were the only ones who seemed unaffected, all apart from Severus but no one paid any heed to him as it was.

Classes were cancelled on the first day back, and instead the students gathered in the Great Hall for a memorial service for Marianne.

Severus spent most of it watching Lily. He wished he could be next to her, his arm around her for comfort. He knew Dumbledore had asked her if she wanted to speak, but she had told him she couldn't. Severus didn't blame her. He remembered his father's funeral all too well. Many of his friends had tried to speak, but they had all broken down. Even if he had only been four at the time, Severus remembered it as if it were yesterday.

Dumbledore spoke warmly about Marianne, and from what he said Severus figured Lily had told him a couple of things. He looked over at her. She was crying silently. James was sitting next to her, and Severus stared as he put his arm around her.

'This is not the time to get jealous,' he tried to tell himself, but it was no use.

"Matter of time," he heard Lucius mutter to Goyle, rather louder than needed. "They do make a nice couple."

Goyle sniggered, casting a glance in Severus' direction. Severus pretended not to be listening.

*

"Are you all right?" James asked after the service had ended. Lily nodded.

"I'll be fine, James," she assured him. "Don't worry about it."

"If you ever need to talk," he offered.

"I know," she said. "Thank you."

"What are friends for, eh?" she said, giving her a slight smile. "Do you want to do something or…"

"I think I just want some time to myself, James," Lily said, and he nodded, watching her disappear up the marble stairs to Gryffindor Tower.

"Friends, eh?" Sirius said, and James turned to face him. He was surprised to see his friend, who usually looked without a care in the world, looking red eyed and worn.

"You all right, Padfoot?" he asked, changing the subject.

"I will be," Sirius nodded, though he didn't sound too convincing. "Wanna go set off some Dungbombs in Filch's office?"

"If it will make you feel better," James said, glad to hear some of Sirius' old spark in his voice.

"Oh, it will," Sirius assured him, attempting one of his devious grins.

*

"I guessed you'd be here," he said, joining her on the sofa. "How are you feeling?" "Terrible," she sighed, leaning her had against his chest. "Why her, Severus? Why Marianne?"

He could hear his uncle's words all to clearly in his head;

'From what I hear, his wife was a muggle. He got what he deserved'.

"I don't know," he lied. "I guess we'll never know."

They sat together in silence for what seemed like an eternity. Severus wanted to speak, but he couldn't think of a single thing that might comfort her. Lily just sat cuddled up in his arms, staring distantly at the fireplace and sobbing every now and again.

"You're quiet," she said after a while. "Is there something wrong?"

"No," he assured her.

"Yes there is," Lily said, looking up at him. "What is it?"

"It's silly really…" he muttered. "It's just… you and James earlier."

"You're jealous?" Lily asked, surprised, and he nodded.

"Well, don't be," she whispered. "I have no interest whatsoever in James Potter beyond friendship."

"He has interest in you," Severus pointed out.

"Oh, please," Lily dismissed. "You're starting to sound like Sirius."

"Well, I'd better stop it then," he said jokingly. Lily knew he wasn't joking.

*

It was late when they left the office. The watch, which Severus had fixed, read 'You should have been in bed ages ago.' He followed her as far as he dared.

"You'll be alright, won't you?" he whispered, kissing her goodnight.

"Yeah," Lilly nodded. "I've got you."

"Lily," he said softly. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" she asked, confused.

"For everything," he said.

"I've forgiven you long ago," she whispered.

Lily had expected the common room to be empty, but when she walked in she saw James in a corner, bent over a piece of parchment. He didn't seem to have noticed her.

"James?" she said carefully, and he jumped, quickly tapping the parchment with his wand and stuffing it into his robes.

"Lily, you scared me," he said, attempting a smile. Had Lily not been as tired as she was, she might have seen through it.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"OK, I guess," she shrugged. "Tired though. Good-night, James."

"Goodnight," he said, watching her make her way to the dormitories.

*

Life slowly went back to normal, and Lily with it. But one morning Severus showed up for Transfiguration, and found she was not there. It would not have worried him, had it not been for the fact that as far as he knew, Lily had never missed a class. He thought for a brief second about asking James where she was, but quickly thought the better of that. Instead, he told McGonagall he wasn't feeling well, and asked if he could go see the nurse. To his great surprise, she let him.

"Let me know if she is alright," she whispered to him before he left. Surprised, he only nodded.

He headed straight for the office, and found her sitting on the sofa, clutching a little, red book.

"Marianne's diary," she said when she saw him. "I found it this morning… She knew about us, Severus."

He sat down, putting an arm around her.

"She asked me, you know," Lily said distantly. "The day after… well, you know. She told me she knew something was going on, and that I shouldn't be afraid to tell her because of who it was. I was going to tell her. I made up my mind during the holidays. And then…"

Her voice cracked, and Severus pulled her closer, comforting her the best he could.

"I don't even have a picture of her," Lily sobbed against his shoulder. "We were best friends for 5 years, and I don't have as much as a bloody picture of her."

He just stroke her back, not knowing what to say.

"What if she thought I didn't trust her?" Lily said suddenly. "What if she died thinking I didn't consider her."

"She didn't," he whispered, interrupting her. "You know she didn't. She knew you were her best friend. She knew you'd tell her when you were ready."

"But what if."

"No buts," he instructed, kissing her.

"What would I do without you?" she whispered, resting her head on his shoulder.

'You'd probably have James to turn to,' he thought.

*

When Lily returned to Gryffindor Tower that night, she found James and Sirius in a hefty quarrel. Remus and Peter were sitting on the sofa, both trying to hide their amusement.

"What on earth did you do that for?" Sirius shouted at James. "What are we going to do without it?"

"Do without what?" Lily asked, and all four of them spun around.

"Er… our supply of Dungbombs," Sirius said quickly. "James had it confiscated."

"Hogsmeade this weekend," Lily said. "Can't you just get new ones?"

"Er, of course," Sirius muttered, going red.

"Honestly," Lily sighed, heading for the dorms. "Goodnight boys."

"Close one, Padfoot," James smiled, patting Sirius on the back.

"Don't you start," Sirius snapped. "Why James? You knew he was going to take it."

"Relax, he's too thick to figure it out," James said calmly. "Besides, we know all the important places as it is. And we still have the cloak."

*

Lily was not looking much forward to the Hogsmede weekend. She didn't feel like going at all, much rather wanting to stay at the castle with Severus. But James and the boys kept nagging her to come with them, and in the end she decided the change of environment might do her good.

"You won't mind, will you?" she asked Severus on Friday night. "Me going with James and the others."

"Of course not," he lied.

"I know you don't like me being around James all the time," Lily started.

"Don't worry about it," he dismissed, kissing her. "I trust you."

*

The Hogsmede Saturday came with bright sunshine, warm sunshine, despite it only being early February. Hogsmede was full of people of all species, and when Lily and the guys went into The Three Broomsticks around lunch they had to wait ten minutes before they finally managed to snatch a table near the window. They sat down with a butterbeer each, the guys planning what to do with their freshly bought supply from Zonko's.

Lily was only half listening. She was looking out the window at the crowd moving down the main street, thinking of Severus. She wished he could have been there too. Had he ever been to Hogsmede at all? She had certainly never seen him there. She imagined herself walking into The Tree broomsticks, hand in hand with Severus. The looks on people's faces. Sirius and James for starters. If only they'd gotten along with Severus, or he'd gotten along with them… But she knew that was too much to ask.

Suddenly someone caught her eye outside. It couldn't be… But it was Severus. Lily watched him edge through the crowd and disappear into a tiny shop next to Honeydukes. The sign on the shop was old and rusty, and Lily had no chance at reading it from across the street. She watched the entrance for a while, and after about five minutes he emerged again, holding a package. He disappeared into the crowd, and Lily lost sight of him. She turned back to the boys, only to find James staring at her. He startled when she turned, and quickly busied himself with reading the label on a packet of Filibuster Fireworks.

*

"Why didn't you tell me you were going today?" Lily asked when they met that evening.

"Going where?" Severus asked, sounding genuinely surprised.

"Hogsmede," Lily said. "I saw you."

"You missed me so much you started seeing things?" he teased.

"Oh stop it," Lily sighed. "I saw you there. Why didn't you tell me? We could have met up."

Severus gave a short laugh. "Could we?" He imitated Lily's voice. "Excuse me guys, I'm just of to snog Severus for a little while."

Lily imagined the boys' reactions, and couldn't help but smile.

"What were you doing there?" she asked.

"I can't tell you," he said, smiling secretively. "It's a secret."

"Really," Lily said, suddenly interested. "I bet I could get you to tell me… I have ways."

"I doubt it," he smiled, pulling her closer. "But I'd love to see you try."

*

"Prongs!" James looked up from his book. Sirius dumped himself on the couch.

"Good news," he said, lowering his voice.

"What?" James asked.

"Valentine's Day is coming up," Sirius grinned.

"And?" James said.

"And I think that might be a good time for you to tell Lily how you feel," Sirius whispered.

"Will you give that Lily-thing a rest?" James sighed. "I'm not in love with her, how many times do I have to tell you?"

"James, you didn't take your eyes off her all day," Sirius said. "And I've told you before, you'd better make your move now before someone else beats you to it."

"There's nothing to beat me to," James started.

"Yes, there is," Sirius interrupted. "Don't think I'm an idiot, James. You're in love with her, and why on earth you're refusing to admit to it is a mystery to me."

"Has it ever occurred to you that the feeling might not be mutual?" James hissed.

"How will you know that if you never ask her?" Sirius countered.

"Some things I don't need to ask," James said, getting up.

"I didn't think you ever got scared, James," Sirius said behind him, but James didn't answer.

"Idiot," Sirius muttered.

*

Lily usually let Valentine's Day pass without a thought. She would get the occasional card, usually unsigned with some extremely soppy message she would always, rightfully, be able to trace back to Sirius. But the card she found in her Potions book this year was definitely not from him.

'Meet me at the office tonight at 7.'

 It wasn't exactly romantic, but it was more than enough for Lily.

At a quarter to seven, she left the common room, glad nobody asked her where she was going. She hurried through the hall, and crept behind the drape. She was about to open the door when it, to her great surprise, spoke.

"Sorry, love. Can't let you in yet."

"But it said seven," Lily said, still amazed she was talking to a door.

"Exactly," the door said. "Seven sharp. You'll just have to wait."

A few minutes later, the door opened and Lily entered the office. Severus was waiting inside, his hands behind his back.

"Did you know the door speaks?" Lily asked, looking back at the door as it closed behind her. Severus didn't answer.

"Close your eyes," he said.

Lily smiled.

"Why?" she asked.

"Just play along," he smiled, and she did. She could feel his hands cover her eyes.

"No looking," he whispered in her ear, and started leading her into the office. He turned her around, and let go of her.

"Don't open them yet," he whispered, and she heard him mutter a couple of spells.

"Right, now you can look."

Lily opened her eyes, and stared at the scene before her.

The fireplace was lit, and a blanket in front of it had replaced the table and couch. The blanket was set with plates and goblets, and a few red-flamed candles hovered above it, giving the room a velvet glow.

"Do you like it?" Severus asked, though the look on her face had already answered that question.

"It's beautiful," Lily whispered, and he smiled.

"Happy Valentine's Day." He pulled out a wrapped box from his robes, handing it to her.

"Severus, you shouldn't have," Lily said, staring at it. "I mean, I didn't get you anything."

"Don't worry about it," he whispered. "Just open it."

They sat down on the blanket, and Lily started unwrapping the box. She lifted the lit of it, and pulled out a heavy, stone basin decorated with runes and signs.

"It's a Pensieve," Severus explained. "It lets you."

"Store your thoughts and memories," Lily finished, still staring at the basin. "Severus, you really shouldn't have. It must have been extremely expensive."

"It was," he whispered, pulling her close to him. "But don't worry about that. You needed one."

Lily gave him a puzzled look.

"Remember how you told me you had no picture of Marianne?" he asked, and Lily nodded.

"Well, now you do," he said. Lily just looked at Severus, completely speechless. A tear rolled down her cheek, and he kissed it away. "Thank you, Severus," she whispered. "I love it… and I love you." He startled, and looked down at her. "I haven't said that before, have I?" Lily blushed, and he shook his head. "Well, I do," she whispered. "And I love you," he whispered back.

***

Awwww. Man can be sweet if he wants to.

Thanks again for all the lovly reviews, keep 'em coming.