Apologises profusely:

SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY! for not updating until now...i know i was doing it once a day but i've been on various expeditions this week and too tired to walk, let alone write.

Hope this will make up for it- an extra long chapter!! (woo)

In the meantime, thanks to my reviewers:

Jvoldieme

Hero4Hire

Firess Ifrit Devil

Sharky

Anna

Rachele Stein- thanks for your previous suggestions. I'm making a slight alteration to one (public toilet) but the theme's there!

Princess of Mirrors

Moongoddess25

... a random anonymous person...

Sebastienne- you're in luck! It's h/d time.and If you're lucky Draco may take on the appearance of Ziggy Stardust and/or Aladdin Sane very very soon! Keep watching!

Thank you ALL so much for encouraging me and making the story so rewarding!

And now for YOUR reward......chapter six!!!

(ps. upon re-reading the last chapter i thought it somewhat trashy, so this one should be a lot better and erm... coherent)

Disclaimer: all characters belong to JKR (except Sasha. And the parole officer- Let's call him Julian.) Goodbye Lenin is a fantastic film from which I only sliiightly stole the plot o_O Dead Famous is by Ben Elton and I borrowed the name of something from there. And erm I'm sure Mill Hill is quite nice but to me it just ah. doesn't.sound.very...nice. yes, that'll do for now. Review review review! (yes Sebastienne discreet and subtle as usual!) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------ Chapter Six- Draco Bowie

Tuesday 20th August, 1991

10:51 am

He'd done it. Lucius had finally been freed from custody. But it had taken him three days, three thousand pounds and a few minutes alone with the parole officer. Although, as Draco had (so kindly) pointed out, it was probably the latter that did it.

So. Certified SARS-free and with a teenage son to piss off, Lucius was in a decidedly better mood than a few days ago. Unfortunately, Draco was more pissed off than he had ever been. Searching through his wardrobe he bitched about lack of Harry-seeing opportunity.

"Fuck's sake. I finally get him to agree to a date and Dad doesn't get locked up. Just m- oooh! My PVC catsuit! I forgot about this!"

As Draco squealed in delight, a thought came to him.

His father would have to get home the muggle way, right? So what if Lucius thought he was coming the right way, but in actual fact he was redirected to...oh I don't know, say, deepest darkest Mill Hill!

"Muahahaha. achk"

Draco's evil cackling was cut short by his choking at what he saw in the mirror. A load moan resounded throughout the halls of the Malfoy Manor.

"NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....."

"Not a spot! No! shit shit shit shit shit. Draco Malfoy does NOT get spots! And on my wand-cleaning day as well!"

(A/N: In all probability wizards don't have these. But as you'll find out it's essential to the plot. So let's pretend they do!)

Draco fumed for a while.

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11:53am

Draco was still fuming. But he was at least putting it to good use. And making some calls to his "contacts". He thanked god for his promiscuity and for the opportunities Pansy's parties had given him to sleep with some people in high-up places. Plus they were cute.

"Esmerelda?. it's Draco.er, we met at Pansy Parkinson's New Year's Party last year, remember?.no?.well erm I was the evil and dark wizard.yes! How ARE you these days?... Well I need to ask a slight favour. Tell me, are you still in charge of Wiltshire landscaping?"

It took a few calls like these, for Draco to arrange with his 'acquaintances' (once they remembered who he was) for the whole of South England to be re-designed. Only temporarily, of course. It would be fantastic, if only he could pull it off.

And in the meantime, thought Draco, he would be able to do whatever he wanted with Harry. Draco checked his watch and then continued to apply gold- glitter face paint.

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Meanwhile, in deepest darkest North London.

Lucius was very very very lost. Having just stepped through a door he was expecting to lead to his home, he found it actually led to Clapham Common.

(A/N: I should probably mention here for all overseas people, that Clapham Common is infamous for gay men meeting and cruising. Watch the fun.)

He sighed and sat on a nearby bench. If only he'd actually been nice to that bloody house elf, he'd be using magic and not stuck in this forest. 'Oh well', he thought to himself, 'at least the people here were friendly.'

"He-lo! You are such a cutie, aren't you?"

Lucius looked around, and then realised the camp ladyboy in front of him, was, infact talking to him.

"Oh, naughty me! I am so RUDE!" the androgynous figure slapped himself comically on the wrist and extended a hand with perfectly painted Barbie- pink nails.

"I'm Sasha. And what's your name gorgeous?"

For the first time in his life, Lucius was at a loss. He was terrified of what this character might want from him. And then, upon closer reflection, he decided Sasha WAS rather cute. So the messed-up journey wasn't a total flop. (Wink wink nudge nudge if you get my drift. Sorry.)

"I'm Lucius. Your place or mine sweetie?"

And erm.well let's just say that I don't want the rating of this fic to have to go up, so there we shall leave Lucius and Sasha erm. """enjoying themselves""" (heavily quoted)

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9.45 pm

Draco gave Harry a drop-dead-gorgeous smile as he let him into the Malfoy Manor. And Harry nearly dropped dead when he saw what Draco was wearing.

"ALADDIN SANE?"

Draco blushed profusely. "Well." He stuttered, "I, you know, thought that it might be c-"

"I LOVE DAVID BOWIE!" Harry exclaimed, cutting Draco off from his mumbled excuse. "How did you find out?"

Draco just gave another grin. He was one lucky git and he knew it. He had attempted to cover up his spot by applying white face paint, then thought 'sod it' and gone the whole hog, with a pink and gold lightning bolt painted across his face and the white PVC catsuit, platform boots, the whole caboodle. Bowie himself would have been proud.

He led Harry into the dimly-lit dining area, where candles were lit, wine was waiting, and "Wild is the wind" was sultrily playing on the stereo. How could Harry not melt?

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10:15 Some bushes in Clapham Common. (ooh classy)

"Oh Sasha!"

"Oh Lucius!"

"Oh Sasha!"

"Oh Lucius!"

"Oh Sasha!"

"Oh Adam!.shit"

(A/N: They're still not finished?! Taps fingers impatiently)

"Lucius, let's go somewhere else. How about your place?"

"Okay, let's go"

And, joined by Sasha, Lucius did something he really should have done the first time round. Got the bus.

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11:52pm Back at the Malfoy Manor.

(Many bottles of wine later)

"And how fantastic was he when he duetted with Freddie Mercury?"

"Oh, 'Under Pressure'? Yeah, I nearly died! It was so fantastic"

Harry and Draco had found that a love for Glam Rock had brought them together. In the space of an hour they had gone from complete strangers to quite amorous. But Bowie'll do that for ya.

They had moved from the table to the black leather sofa, both quite drunk, and both assessing how gorgeous the other one looked. Harry had always had a secret crush on David Bowie, and had hoped that maybe he was more towards the gay side of his bisexual-ness. Now he thought that Draco looked even better than the real thing, while Draco couldn't stop thinking how good Harry's arms looked in his tight black turtle-neck, and how nice his arse was in those black chinos. Not that he'd been looking or anything.

"Harry."

"Draco."

They both spoke at once.

"Go ahead Draco, it wasn't important."

"No no, you're the guest, I insist" Draco erm. insisted.

Harry blushed shyly, "Well I just wanted to thank you for inviting me over here tonight. I mean, it's been great to find someone who shares my taste."

Draco found himself blushing as he imagined sharing Harry's taste.

".in music."

"That's fine Harry, really the pleasure has been all mine."

More blushing. WHY did he have to say 'pleasure'?

"Anyway, Draco, it's getting late, I'd better be going now."

"You don't have to go, you know. I mean, there's loads of room here. I could make up a spare bed for you, it's no trouble really."

"I'd rather share your bed" whispered Harry seductively as his lips brushed Draco's.

Draco felt his face glowing with pleasure as they shared an urgent, passionate kiss. Harry's hands started undoing his catsuit, and as his fingers entwined Harry's hair, he felt the glow spread rather lower than his face.

Draco took Harry's hand and, undressing him with his eyes, led him out of the room, up the stairs and along the corridor. They were headed to the most elusive room in England. Copulation Cabin.

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11:56

Lucius unlocked the front door of the Malfoy Manor, had a quick check to see if Draco was around and led Sasha into the entrance hall.

"Ooh, gorgeous AND rich! Sasha you clever boy, you HAVE done well tonight! So what now, we gonna do it on the rug?"

"No Sasha, Lucius replied. We're going to-"

"Not Copulation Cabin??" Sasha broke in

"Yes. That's exactly where we're going"

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************* - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

OOOOOOOOOH cliffhanger! I do love a good cliffhanger, yanno.

So how was that then? Hopefully it was a little more plot, a little less random humour, that's me trying to prove I'm not just a one-trick pony.

Find out next time what happens when both Malfoy men take their lovers to the same room!!!

A fight?

A competition?

An orgy???

You'll just have to wait and see...and review of course. xxx ttfn

Ps. Tell me what you want to happen- after all this is written more for you than for me. I can't deny I'm having a darn good time writing it though!