Hmmm...okay. For some reason I thought about updating this story, and as you can see. . . I did. Once again, I must tell you that reading this might be hazardous to your mental health. But I'm sure you can manage. Enough tittering. . .on with the show. . .

Disclaimer: I do not own anything (but I wouldn't say no to owning Draco *wink*)

Oh yes. . . to avoid any confusion or anyone who doesn't know what I'm blabbing about (you know who you are) Hawk is me (the author) it is short for Black Hawk (which is my name, right up there. . .see)

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Oh yes. . .one more thing. This next song that Harry is singing is from Veggie tales. If you have no idea what that is. . .good for you. But I am hooked on the cute little vegetables that sing and dance. But it comes with the territory of having a 4 year old sister who watches the tapes over and over again.

~*~*~*~

Draco: Ho-hum

Hermione: Did you just call me a ho!

Draco: Umm . . .

Hermione: *zaps a squirrel tail onto Draco*

Draco: AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! *runs around screaming*

Hawk: What's going on here?

Hermione: You should know. You're the author!

Draco: GA! I have a squirrel butt!!!

Hawk: Always knew you were a bit squirrley.

Draco: Hey!

Hawk: *turns to Hermione* I guess you better change him then *winks*

Hermione: *winks back* *evil grin* Of course *zaps him in drag* (but still with the tail)

Ron: *enters* what's going on guys?

Hermione: Not much

Hawk: *shrugs*

Draco: *looks down at his clothing* Hmmm. . .*walks over to full length mirror and makes kissie faces at himself*

Ron: Who is that hot blonde over there?

Hermione/Hawk: . . .

Ron: *walks over to Draco*

Hermione: *zaps a squirrel tail onto Ron as well*

Draco: EEEE!!! You're just like me! Come to me life mate! *makes kissie faces at Ron*

Ron: *runs screaming out of the room*

Draco: *chases him*

Hawk: Well that was entertaining

Hermione: Yes

Hawk: Draco will probably scar poor Ron for life

Hermione: *nods*

Hawk: Wanna watch?

Hermione: Sure

~*~*~*~*~*~

Neville: * walks in with produce* Hey Harry. Do you want a tomato?

Harry: *eyes light up*

Hawk: hehehehehehehehehehe

Draco/Ron: Uh no. . .what's going on?

Harry: *singing* If you like to talk to tomatoes. . .

Ron: I don't like to talk to tomatoes

Hermione: Your having him sing again?

Harry: If a squash can make you smile. . .

Draco: No they don't make me smile

Hawk: I can do whatever I want. I'm the author, I have that right.

Harry: If you like to waltz with potatoes. . .

Draco: Well never with potatoes, carrots yes.

Hawk: *mouth hanging open* You dance with your veggies?

Harry: Up and down the produce isle! . . .

Draco: Umm. . .

Harry: Have we got a show for you!!!

Hermione/ Hawk: Oooookay.

Harry: Veggie tales, Veggie tales, Veggie tales, Veggie taaales,

Ron: Kinda catchy

Draco: Don't you start!

Harry: Veggie tales, Veggie tales, Veggie tales. Veg-gie tales,

Hermione: I heard your the reason he does this

Hawk: Well yes. I fill his tiny little mind with silly songs, to make you all crazy . . . mwahhahahahahahaha!!

Draco: Well, it isn't working.

Hawk: No? oh poo

Harry: Broccoli. . .Celery. . .Gotta be. . .Veggietales

Neville: *still holding the tomato*

Harry: Lima beans. . . Collard greens. . .Peachy keen. . .Veggietales

Hawk: *sulking*

Snape: *enters*

Harry: Cauliflower. . .Sweet and Sour. . .Half an' hour. . .Veggietales

Snape: *shakes his butt*

Ron/Draco/Neville/Hermione: *watching Snape's butt jiggle like Jell-O*

Harry: There's never ever ever ever ever ever been a show like Veggie tales!

Hawk: *gets hypnotized by Snape's butt *

Harry: There's never ever ever ever ever ever been a show like Veggie tales!

Snape: *starts smacking bottom*

Ron: Oh yeah, spank it!

Draco/Hermione: *look at him funny*

Ron: *blushes*

Harry: It's time for Veggie TaaaaAAaaAAaaaAAles!!!!! *bows, falls over*



Snape: *turns, looks down at his bum* You danced wonderfully

Draco: Umm sir? Are you speaking to you buttocks?

Snape: Yes. Lucille and Mary-Ann are very good friends of mine

Hermione: Lucille? Mary-Ann?

Snape: They have names you know. . .Lucille *points to left cheek* Mary-Ann *points to right*

Ron: Posteriors usually don't answer to names

Snape: How do you know unless you ask it? *turns to backside again* Come along girls, Time for your bubble bath. *blows a kiss at them*

Hawk: *to readers* That was pointless, I think the lot is crazy

Neville: We can still hear you

Hawk: oops

Ron: Guess what every one!

Everyone: WHAT?

Ron: *turns around pushing out his butt* Snape was right! Meet Steve and Sha-nay-nay *points to both cheeks*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wow, once again, I have no idea what I was thinking. Does anyone think I need help?

Draco/Ron/Harry/Hermione: *raises hands*

Hawk: *looks around and also raises hand*

AH! How dare you! I would expect such from those other freaks (Draco/Ron/Harry/Hermione: HEY!) But your my alter ego!

Hawk: *blows raspberry*

*sigh*

~

The deal with Snape talking to his but was a request from Pet Giraffe. I love requests because it gives me ideas for what to write. Plus there was that threat of having sponge bob attack me. (*hides under covers*). Please review.