Jurassic potter chapter 6: Schnookie's Secret!!!!!!
Harry, Ron, Hermione and Grant head to hagrids' hut so Ron can get more pot.
Ron Starts to steal some of Hagrids homegrown pot leaves But Draco Malfoy stops them.
Draco: Harry Potter
Harry: Draco Malfoy???????????
Grant: Didn't he just die?
Ron: (who just used a leaf to get high.) Dammit another Doppelganger! [Hermione slaps Ron for Cursing.]
Draco: I'm gonna tell your stealing!
Hagrid comes out holding a shotgun.
Hagrid: Gotcha ya little fucken thieves!!!
Hermione Slaps Hagrid for cursing.
Hagrid: Harry, Ron Hermione How are you doing? Hey! Have you been stealing my fucking pot again!?
Ron:….ummm Draco did it.
Draco: Wha?
Hagrid shoots Draco in the head instantly killing him.
Hagrid: Punk ass bitch!
Hermione slaps Hagrid again
Hermione: Hagrid the next time you curse I'll rip your tongue out!
Hagrid: I'd like to see ya try ya bitch ass hoe! Why don't you go shove a stick up yer ass!
Hermione: Fuck you!
Hermione attacks Hagrid but Hagrid ducks and kicks Hermione knocking her outside. Hagrid Jumps out the door and body slams Hermione. Ron throws a skillet at Hagrid knocking him off. Suddenly Fang attacks Ron, Ron Jumps out the way. Fang Grabs Ron and tries to punch him but Ron hits him in his "Sack" with a skillet. Buckbeak and Hagrid double team Hermione landing constant blows to her stomach. Hermione jump kicks Hagrid in the stomach but his protective layer of fat causes Hermione to fall back Hagrid Picks up his shotgun but Ron knocks it out of his hand with a skillet. Fang Kicks Hermione From behind and knocks her down. Buck beak holds Ron while Hagrid punches him. But Alan Grant picks up the shotgun and kills Buck beak and Fang. Hagrid starts bouncing on Hermione and Ron like a big beach ball until Grant shoots Hagrid. Hagrid instantly deflates into a skinny white man.
Harry: Stop the violence!!! [Cry's like a little bitch.]
Hermione: You're not Hagrid!
Ron: He's a doppelganger! [Ron gets high and starts stealing more pot.]
Doppelganger: I'm not a doppelganger I am [Pulls off skin suit] Lucius Malfoy!
Ron: Liar you're a doppelganger [throws skillet at lucius but misses because he's so high.]
Hermione: Why'd you kill your own son!?
Lucius: Oh that really was Draco? Damn!
Hermione: Why are you here?
Lucius: I'll never tell you
Ron: I'll get it out of him!
Ron hands Harry Hermione and Grant Ear muffs and Starts singing.
Ron: Lo-o-o-ovin you is more than just a dream come true! And every thing that I do is out of love for you! Do-n-do-n doo doo
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lucius: OH GOD HELP ME GOD!!!!!! SOMBODY KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!!
Alan Takes his headphones off too early and the moment he hears Ron singing his head explodes.
Ron: Yippee the wicked Grant is dead!
Harry: This constant death is depressing! [Harry cries like a little bitch.]
Hermione: Why are you here at Hogwarts!?
Lucius: I'll never tell!!!
Hermione: Ron.
Ron: [Singing] I love you, you love me were a happy family…
Lucius: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'LL TALK JUST STOP SINGING!!!!!!!!
Harry: Stop the suffering, stop it!!!! [Continues to cry like a little bitch.]
Lucius: I'm here to serve Schnookie!
Hermione: Why is Schnookie killing everyone?
Lucius: Because…
Suddenly Schnookie comes from behind Lucius and Kills him.
Schnookie: Because dear children…[Starts to take mask off but can't get it off] Nggh stupid piece of! [Suddenly the mask comes off.]
Because I am Lord VOLDEMORT! BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Harry: [Continues crying.]
Hermione: …………
Ron: [Gets high and continues stealing pot.]
