Sorry to disappoint you guys, but its back to Ash's POV! Anyway this is the concluding part of Xmas Eve! Xmas Day is up next, where a special dinner companion arrives!

Later

We were all sat in the living room, drinking as a way to combat the shock that MEL, Miss I am holier, smarter, thinner, blonder and generally better than thou, was pregnant. I was knocking back the Baileys at a frenzied rate, urck kids! The only person not drinking was Mel (who we had to physically restrain to keep her away from the vodka) and that was due to the fear that it would cause the baby to end up like Kat.

"So what are you going to call it then?" Beast asks still wearing the pregnancy suit as he perched on the edge of the coffee table (we had little seating).

"IT?!" Kurt exploded outraged "IT?! HANK IT'S A BABY! MY…er….OUR BABY" He indicated to where Mel was being carefully watched by Bounce and Jubilee.

"Well I wanted to call it after someone who's dead" Mel said tucking into some pickled onions (was it me or did cravings start earlier and earlier nowadays?)

"Well what about Charles or Scott?" Wolverine suggested helpfully

"They aren't dead though!"

"That's a matter of opinion" Wolverine grumbled

Kat stuck her hand in the air "I know, I know!"

"What?" I asked suffering from a lack of curiosity as I got absorbed by the mating rituals of the African killer bee as displayed in that channel I couldn't remember the name of though it did sound intellectual!

"You could call it after ME!" She squealed the menace with red hair

"Or ME!" Bobby yelled bouncing onto Hank's 'swollen belly'.

"ARGH! I'M GOING TO MISCARRY!" Hank yelled panicking but we just ignored him.

Kat thumped Bobby "No me!"

"No it's going to be called Bobby if it's a boy or Bobette if it's a girl!"

"No Katherine or Katron!"

Bobby pointed an iced up finger at Kat "There's only one way to decide this!"

10 Minutes later….

We stood at the window as Mel explained that her choices in names would either be Evelyn Wagner if a girl or Joseph Wagner if a boy.

Kat stood in front of Bobby steely determination in her eyes; we sighed and returned to our seats. After a second or so we saw the pair (complete with saucepans on their heads) collide.

"I wonder who won" I said more to block out the sound of one of those bloody warbley films that Mel liked.

"Ummmm I wonder!" Hank said barely even sounding interested.

The whole point of this contest was for Bobby and Kat to run at each other at high speed, with saucepans on their heads and the last one to pass out after the collision was the winner, and would have the baby named after them. The only comfort in the whole process was that neither of them had a brain cell between them that could get damaged.

 Later….

Bobby and Kat both stumbled into the room saucepans still perched on heads.

"So who won?"  Mel asked as her saddo film came to a close.

Bobby and Kat looked sheepishly at each other

"We don't know we can remember anything after the impact!" They replied honestly

By the fridge

As I peered in to check our stock of alcoholic beverages, a thought suddenly hit me. I grabbed the nearest bottle of vodka and ran like the wind into the living room.

I rested one hand against the door frame as I gasped for air. "I've just thought…."

"Steady on" I heard Wolverine mumble as he took another sip of his cheap Canadian beer.

"That cheese would be real good about now?" Kat guessed hopefully

"No…"

"That the sea lions aren't half as angry as you believe them to be?" Tristan asked eyebrow cocked

I shot him a dirty look, how dare he bring up my drunken ramblings? "No…" I began again

"I know, I know!" Bobby said hand thrust into the air excitedly "That the polar ice caps are probably made of ice?"

"No…" I continued hurriedly determined not to be interrupted anymore "…that the pregnancy test hadn't been open yet, so we don't know if Mel's even pregnant!"

I saw Tristan reach under the sofa for our ever ready supply of party hats just incase the news was good and she wasn't pregnant.

Mel's hand flew to her mouth "Oh I forgot to take it and just kinda got carried away with the whole situation"

I threw the test at her head (luckily I missed and hit Wolverine instead) "I take it you have enough fluid in your bladder to take it now and put us out of our misery"

Mel got up and walked on wobbly giraffe legs to the bathroom. Kurt got up and followed her to the door which promptly shut in his face.

"Keep your fingers crossed that she isn't sprogged up" Bounce said loudly crossing her long slender fingers, everyone else promptly copied.

We sat in silence for a moment before Bobby looked at his watch and a look of panic spread across his face as he got up and began tugging on Hanks belly.

"It needs to go back to the shop it's already an hour late going back!" He said pulling against Hank who was screaming

"My baby! MY POOR UNBORN BABY!!" Hank began to sob as Bobby pulled the pregnancy suit off of him.

Bobby ran off with the suit in a similar fashion to the way Gollum looks when he's grabbed the ring.

"Come back you brute!" Hank squeaked from his crumpled pile in the floor.

10 minutes later

Still no news from Mel. I went over to the bathroom door and pounded on it.

"Go away your putting me off" Came Mel's irritated voice.

"Oh my god is that Sabretooth!" I yelled in my best Kat 'he tried to kill me' voice.

That seemed to do the trick, I rubbed my hands together

We sat in a circle around the coffee table

"So, how long does it take to decided whether your pregnant or not?" Richard asked

"Geez Louise, you and Hank are bloody Doctors you should be able to tell us!" Jubilee snorted

Hank sulked at the corner of the table

"Could you hold this a second Tristan?" Mel asked passing Tristan the pregnancy test as she got up and snapped the top off of a coke can.

"Mmm….good idea I could do with a beer" Tristan said as he reached for the bottle opener and a bottle of cheap beer, he absently put the test in his mouth as he opened the beer bottle.

We all stared at him

"What? I'm thirsty!" He said then he paused "EW, ew, ew, ew, ew!!" He began to rub his hand on his tongue, until he realized that too was contaminated and he ran to the bathroom.

"Ohhh what does that line mean?" Hank asked peering at the test

Bounce, er bounced on the floor excitedly in anticipation

"It means I'm not pregnant" Mel sighed but she didn't sound too unhappy.

We all looked at each other, as Richard pulled the party hats out and handed them around.

"Celebrate good times….."

So I hoped ya'll liked and will join in the festivities of Xmas Day…okay I know its nowhere near Xmas yet but I wanted to do a Xmas Retribution Fic before I moved away from them! Please Review! And see ya on Xmas Day!