The Christian that went To Hogwarts
Disclaimer: don't sue me. it's not mine.
Authors note: all readers should note, that the 'Stupid Pagan Girl' is a real person, a girl I work with by the name of Jeni. insanity at it's core, she likes hyper GERMAN techno music, anything Japanese, and trying to think of loopholes to bypass the three-fold law.
(SPG: damn right)
she's also a little...strange
(SPG: better then being a HYPER GERMAN FISH!)
you still haven't gotten the Christian reference, have you?
(SPG: I have, I just prefer to call you a fish.)
isn't there a song about that?
(SPG is suddenly reduced to singing German techno song about fish)
so, now we're on chapter five.
(SPG: WAIT! WHY THE HELL DID YOU PUT HER IN SLYTHERIN?!?!)
I told you, pastor's daugthers always end up being evil.
(SPG: you just like torturing her.)
that too.
Chapter five: first night in hell
Ariana kept her head down, and her eyes focused on her food.
currently she was surrounded by evil demon looking people laughing and talking about spells and curses.
"So. you're a pureblood....and a Christian?" a girl attempted to greet Ariana.
"yeah, that's right" Ariana quickly agreed.
"what's your surname?" a blonde male asked.
"Azivedo." Ariana shot back without any hesitation.
"where's that from?" a bear faced girl asked.
"Portugal." Ariana quickly replied.
"and...you're a Christian."
"YES!" Ariana screamed, leaping to her feet. "I'm a Christian! Me dad's a Pastor! me mum's a music minister!"
with that, the girl raced from the great hall.
"your house, your problem" McGonagall hissed to the potions master.
"By the Gods, remind me later to tear that damned hat to shreds" Severus cursed as he stood up, taking one last gulp from his goblet, which sloshed a little down his chin and onto his black robes.
"wouldn't take much" McGonagall grinned in response.
--
Severus rushed down the hall after his rogue student; who turned down a hall and vanished.
calmly, Severus slowed to a walk, turned into a very dark, quiet classroom, and pulled the door open on a large pine cabinet.
inside Ariana was curled in a ball, crying.
"how did you..." She whimpered, swallowing hard in the middle of her sentence "know I was here?"
"Miss Azivedo, I have been a professor at Hogwarts for longer then you have been alive. and in those fourteen years, every single time a student has lost control of his or her emotions, and fled the great hall, they have ended up hiding in this very cabinet."
"really?" Ariana asked, surprised.
"well, except for Greg Stevens, my second year teaching here. bloody dolt couldn't figure out how to open the cabinet door. found him viciously pulling on the handle."
Ariana laughed slightly, and wiped away her tears. "who're you?"
"Professor Severus Snape. your head of house, and potions master here."
"really?" Ariana asked, bewildered.
"No I just made all of that up. I'm really a Crazed ax murderer here to hack you to bits."
even in the dark, Severus could See Ariana's eyes grow huge.
"go back to the feast." Severus shook his head.
"I'd Rather not."
"Then go to the Dorm. but you cant hide in the Torture chamber all night."
"Torture Chamber?"
"Yes, this is the room Argus filch uses to punish students. can't you smell the dried blood?"
after a quick sniff to the air, and with a scream of pure terror, Ariana fled the room.
"I love my Job." Severus smirked, slowly following her from the charms classroom.
--
Down in the Dungeons, Ariana was beating her hands against the wall angrily. "LET ME IN!"
"not without the password" a cold, hollow ghostlike voice reverberated throughout the room.
"DOGFOOD! NEFERTITI! SCOOBY DOO! TUPPERWARE!" Ariana let loose another list of random words, hoping to guess the password.
"Purest of blood." professor snapes voice silkily commanded.
"thank you professor...." Ariana turned to face her head of house, now seeing him for the first time.
She let out a shriek of terror that echoed loudly in the dark stone dungeons.
"you can stop that at any moment, Miss Azivedo" Snape returned calmly.
"b-But...your...face....are you a vampire? DON'T KILL ME!!!" Ariana cowered down into a corner.
"For heavens sake child get a hold of yourself!" Snape hissed, pulling her back to her feet. "I'm not going to kill you, I'm not ev.....I'm not going to kill you." he paused looking into her small face. "Go into the common room. up the stairs to the left is your dorm room. your things have been taken there."
Ariana stared at her head of house and nodded, tears streaming down her cheeks.
--
"Hey Ariana...Feeling Better?" Sarah, one of her dorm-mates asked between breaths of a conversation about the feast.
"Yeah...i've just been...reading" Ariana trailed off, and looked down at the book open on the bed.
Sarah looked down and frowned at the words. then she flipped them around to where she could read them, and frowned even more.
"Then Jacob Begat...what the hell is begat?"
in the background, Michelle, a tall brunette began to bleat like a sheep. "B-e-e-e-ega-a-a-a-t"
"it means to give birth."
"a guy gave birth to a kid? Sarah asked, cocking her eyebrow. before Ariana could explain, Sarah continued. "you Christians are WEIRD."
Ariana smirked, then went back to her bible reading,
A/N: I am enjoying this WAY too much.
(SPG: I noticed.)
speaking of SPG, she wants everyone to know she's a manic depressive.
(SPG: I resent that remark.)
resent, or resemble?
(SPG:....)
that's what I thought.
anyway, this was my newest addition to the insanity that is The Christian that went to Hogwarts, I'm enjoying all my reviews. *sniffs* I feel special.
(SPG: she is special....you all...have NO idea...we're talking setting records here...for the most hyper German fish to ever exist.)
I AM NOT A FISH.
(SPG: *sings fish song*)
Disclaimer: don't sue me. it's not mine.
Authors note: all readers should note, that the 'Stupid Pagan Girl' is a real person, a girl I work with by the name of Jeni. insanity at it's core, she likes hyper GERMAN techno music, anything Japanese, and trying to think of loopholes to bypass the three-fold law.
(SPG: damn right)
she's also a little...strange
(SPG: better then being a HYPER GERMAN FISH!)
you still haven't gotten the Christian reference, have you?
(SPG: I have, I just prefer to call you a fish.)
isn't there a song about that?
(SPG is suddenly reduced to singing German techno song about fish)
so, now we're on chapter five.
(SPG: WAIT! WHY THE HELL DID YOU PUT HER IN SLYTHERIN?!?!)
I told you, pastor's daugthers always end up being evil.
(SPG: you just like torturing her.)
that too.
Chapter five: first night in hell
Ariana kept her head down, and her eyes focused on her food.
currently she was surrounded by evil demon looking people laughing and talking about spells and curses.
"So. you're a pureblood....and a Christian?" a girl attempted to greet Ariana.
"yeah, that's right" Ariana quickly agreed.
"what's your surname?" a blonde male asked.
"Azivedo." Ariana shot back without any hesitation.
"where's that from?" a bear faced girl asked.
"Portugal." Ariana quickly replied.
"and...you're a Christian."
"YES!" Ariana screamed, leaping to her feet. "I'm a Christian! Me dad's a Pastor! me mum's a music minister!"
with that, the girl raced from the great hall.
"your house, your problem" McGonagall hissed to the potions master.
"By the Gods, remind me later to tear that damned hat to shreds" Severus cursed as he stood up, taking one last gulp from his goblet, which sloshed a little down his chin and onto his black robes.
"wouldn't take much" McGonagall grinned in response.
--
Severus rushed down the hall after his rogue student; who turned down a hall and vanished.
calmly, Severus slowed to a walk, turned into a very dark, quiet classroom, and pulled the door open on a large pine cabinet.
inside Ariana was curled in a ball, crying.
"how did you..." She whimpered, swallowing hard in the middle of her sentence "know I was here?"
"Miss Azivedo, I have been a professor at Hogwarts for longer then you have been alive. and in those fourteen years, every single time a student has lost control of his or her emotions, and fled the great hall, they have ended up hiding in this very cabinet."
"really?" Ariana asked, surprised.
"well, except for Greg Stevens, my second year teaching here. bloody dolt couldn't figure out how to open the cabinet door. found him viciously pulling on the handle."
Ariana laughed slightly, and wiped away her tears. "who're you?"
"Professor Severus Snape. your head of house, and potions master here."
"really?" Ariana asked, bewildered.
"No I just made all of that up. I'm really a Crazed ax murderer here to hack you to bits."
even in the dark, Severus could See Ariana's eyes grow huge.
"go back to the feast." Severus shook his head.
"I'd Rather not."
"Then go to the Dorm. but you cant hide in the Torture chamber all night."
"Torture Chamber?"
"Yes, this is the room Argus filch uses to punish students. can't you smell the dried blood?"
after a quick sniff to the air, and with a scream of pure terror, Ariana fled the room.
"I love my Job." Severus smirked, slowly following her from the charms classroom.
--
Down in the Dungeons, Ariana was beating her hands against the wall angrily. "LET ME IN!"
"not without the password" a cold, hollow ghostlike voice reverberated throughout the room.
"DOGFOOD! NEFERTITI! SCOOBY DOO! TUPPERWARE!" Ariana let loose another list of random words, hoping to guess the password.
"Purest of blood." professor snapes voice silkily commanded.
"thank you professor...." Ariana turned to face her head of house, now seeing him for the first time.
She let out a shriek of terror that echoed loudly in the dark stone dungeons.
"you can stop that at any moment, Miss Azivedo" Snape returned calmly.
"b-But...your...face....are you a vampire? DON'T KILL ME!!!" Ariana cowered down into a corner.
"For heavens sake child get a hold of yourself!" Snape hissed, pulling her back to her feet. "I'm not going to kill you, I'm not ev.....I'm not going to kill you." he paused looking into her small face. "Go into the common room. up the stairs to the left is your dorm room. your things have been taken there."
Ariana stared at her head of house and nodded, tears streaming down her cheeks.
--
"Hey Ariana...Feeling Better?" Sarah, one of her dorm-mates asked between breaths of a conversation about the feast.
"Yeah...i've just been...reading" Ariana trailed off, and looked down at the book open on the bed.
Sarah looked down and frowned at the words. then she flipped them around to where she could read them, and frowned even more.
"Then Jacob Begat...what the hell is begat?"
in the background, Michelle, a tall brunette began to bleat like a sheep. "B-e-e-e-ega-a-a-a-t"
"it means to give birth."
"a guy gave birth to a kid? Sarah asked, cocking her eyebrow. before Ariana could explain, Sarah continued. "you Christians are WEIRD."
Ariana smirked, then went back to her bible reading,
A/N: I am enjoying this WAY too much.
(SPG: I noticed.)
speaking of SPG, she wants everyone to know she's a manic depressive.
(SPG: I resent that remark.)
resent, or resemble?
(SPG:....)
that's what I thought.
anyway, this was my newest addition to the insanity that is The Christian that went to Hogwarts, I'm enjoying all my reviews. *sniffs* I feel special.
(SPG: she is special....you all...have NO idea...we're talking setting records here...for the most hyper German fish to ever exist.)
I AM NOT A FISH.
(SPG: *sings fish song*)
