AN: Here's the next chapter with some R/J parts in it! Finally, right? I wrote this chapter a little differently than the others but I hope you like it anyway. Thank you all so much for the awesome reviews, they've been really great! Enjoy!

touch me

The caterpillar slowly made it's way across the blade of grass. She reached out to touch its furry hide, it recoiled as she did so. Laughter escaped her lips as she thought about placing this inside of Melanie's birthday cake, oh would she get a scare! And that would show Mel for telling on her the other day.

Kimmy sighed and rolled over onto her back, staring up at the clouds. But if she did that she would be grounded, which meant to soccer practice tomorrow. And if she didn't go to soccer practice she wouldn't play in her game on Friday. So, what to do? Give Melanie the scare of her life or the soccer game? Kimmy weighed these two possibilities thoughtfully, an eight year olds life was certainly complicated.

But soon enough the clouds above began to distract her. Oh! A fish with two fins! That one floating there looked like a football. And the one next to it looked like . . .hmm, what did it look like? Maybe something she had for lunch the other day. And that one looked like a caterpillar.

Which reminded her! Kimmy sat up and searched the grass for the furry little scarer, but it was gone. Sugar! So much for a birthday surprise for her favorite sister. Looks like she would be going to her soccer game on Friday after all.

"Kimmy, sweetie! Uncle Jess is here!"

"Okay I'm coming!" Kimmy said as she pulled herself off the ground. She grinned, excited about seeing Uncle Jess again, they hardly ever got to anymore. But she was also confused, what was he doing here today? Aunt Rory was here today too, she hadn't seen them together in a long time. Kimmy furrowed her eyebrows as she recalled the times they had. Yeah, they were definitely a lot funner back then. They told jokes and laughed more. But whenever Kimmy mentioned this to Mom she hushed her up real fast.

She broke into a run as she caught sight of the back of her house. She scurried up the steps of the deck and crashed into her father. He stumbled and grunted, "Woah there Kim, watch where you're going." He held a platter of raw meat in his hands. "What do you want? Steak, burger, or hot dog?"

Kimmy licked her lips and promptly answered, "Steak please!"

Dad chuckled and ruffled her hair, "That's my girl."

Kimmy swerved around her Dad to find Uncle Jess in the kitchen holding Melanie in his arms. She was such a suck up!

Kimmy bounced forward, "Hey Uncle Jess!"

He turned toward her, "Kim! How's it going?" He held out a hand for a high five. "How's soccer going?"

"Awesome, I scored three goals last game! A hat trick!"

"The next Mia Hamm!"

"Well, I learned how to ballet run in dance class yesterday!" Melanie contoured looking hopefully at Uncle Jess for praise.

Kimmy rolled her eyes, "Wow, I'm sure that took talent."

Melanie stuck her tongue out at Kimmy.

Looking around the kitchen, Kimmy searched for her mother. "Mom! When's dinner gunna be ready?"

"As soon as you're father finishes it." Lane said appearing from the family room.

***

A half an hour later everyone was seated inside because it had turned cold outside. It was very cramped, especially Kimmy who had absolutely no room whatsoever. Thomas was on side of her sticking his bony elbows into HER space, and Aunt Rory was on the other. At least she kept her elbows to herself.

Kimmy was sitting across from Uncle Jess who was apparently in a deep conversation with Melanie who sat beside him. Rolling her eyes Kimmy watched as Melanie explained exactly how to point your toe in ballet. But she noticed that every now and then Uncle Jess would glance up across the table and then quickly back at Melanie. It didn't even look as though he was listening to Melanie at all, which was unusual because he was normally so attentive. He just kept nodding and saying "wow" and "that's great".

The next time Uncle Jess glanced up Kimmy noticed what he was looking at, Aunt Rory. She also noticed that they both were doing it. Uncle Jess would glance at her and as soon as he looked away Rory would glimpse at him as though she felt his gaze.

The whole thing was very amusing to Kimmy, she continued to watch them do it through out the rest of dinner. But she was puzzled, why then, if they kept looking at each other, did they not speak? Well, they talked to every one else but barely two words to each other except "pass the butter please", and "thank you."

Kimmy once again thought back to the time when they would constantly talk and stare and each other without looking away. Kimmy had only been four, but she remembered this one time when Uncle Jess and Aunt Rory and taken her out to a professional hockey game. But the thing is, she barely remembers the hockey game at all. One of her earliest memories consists of simply Uncle Jess and Aunt Rory.

She had been standing in line for something, holding on tightly to Uncle Jess' hand. She had tugged on his hand but received no response. Kimmy remembers acutely looking up to see Aunt Rory and Uncle Jess just staring at each other. His hand had been on her cheek and they would not stop staring at each other! That was the first time in her life that she had felt completely and utterly ignored, though not exactly purposely.

"Hey Kimmy, did you watch your Patriots lose today?" Thomas said beside her, digging his elbows eve deeper into her stomach.

Kimmy instantly forgot all about her aunt and uncle to talk about more important things: football.

****************************************************

He wasn't blind. Everyone thought that he had no idea what was going on. But he knew.

He had checked the divorce papers, she still hadn't signed them yet. Not one page.

He wondered now how many times she had lied to him.

Like tonight for example. Oh, it's nothing really, Lane just invited me over for dinner. A little get together to celebrate Mel's birthday. You don't have to come, I know you have a lot of work to do.

Ha. Work to do. Bull shit. He could tell by the way she concentrated on her book instead of looking at him. The way she bit her lip and fidgeted with the ring on her finger. He would be there and she didn't want her fiancé anywhere near her.

He knew that Jess still loved her, everyone could see that but her. He could even see it for God sakes. She was the blind one, she couldn't see what was standing right in front of her.

Him.

Beads of sweat clung to his temple as Ryan took another satisfying gulp of his whiskey. He was feeling somewhat dizzy and his vision was clouding before him. Drunk? Him? No. Absolutely not. Sure, he liked the occasional scotch, but nothing that truly affected him.

The liquor slipping down his throat felt smooth and fuzzy at the same times. Whiskey tasted disgusting but the warm feeling that spread to the tips of his toes was entirely worth it. He had made a promise to himself long ago that he would never be the man getting wasted alone at some bar over some woman. But guess what? Here he was . . .wasted.

He had given her everything. He had given her all his love but had never gotten anything in return. In the beginning she had told him right out that she would never be able to really fall in love with him. That she was done with love. But he thought that he could change her, well he couldn't. She would never love him, not the way he wanted her to anyway.

"Refill, please." Ryan said to the passing bartender. The man gave him a refill without a second glance and Ryan slapped more bills onto the bar.

This time he took the shot in one great gulp.

He had let himself fall in love with her.

But she had told him not to. There was no one to blame but himself and he would have to live with it for the rest of his life.

****************************************************

"Do you think we should put a birthday surprise in Mel's bed tonight?" Asked Thomas later on that night.

Kimmy, sitting beside him on the couch was thoughtful for a moment. "But we'll get grounded and I have a soccer game on Friday."

Thomas sat back to contemplate this. "I don't have one for another two weeks, so I could do it."

"But I want some part in it!" Kimmy whispered harshly with a frown. "Just for some kinda fun tonight."

"Yeah, tonight wasn't really much fun. Wonder why?"

"'Cuz Uncle Jess and Aunt Rory hardly talked to any us."

"Yeah, they really didn't." Thomas said and then turned eagerly to her, "So how should we do this?"

"I saw a caterpillar today outside. I can try and find another!" Kimmy said excitedly.

"Perfect, you get the caterpillar and I'll put in her bed. Meet me in the front yard in fifteen minutes."

Kimmy launched herself off the couch and grabbed her coat from the hall closet. She couldn't go out the back door because Mom, Dad, James and Mel were in there playing with Melanie's new toys. She silently slid out the front door and made her way around the house.

She was sidling along the edge of the house when she heard harsh voices coming from the back yard that made her stop dead.

"Then why did you come if you don't want to see me so much?!"

Whose voice was that? It sounded like her voice when she had lost the soccer championship last year!

"You can be very cold, Jess!"

It was Aunt Rory! But why did she sound so upset?

"Rory, you know I don't mean it like that!"

That was Uncle Jess! Why were they yelling at each other like that?

"I just can't . . .I can't be around you anymore. It's hard! I'm trying to move on with my life! I can't keep seeing you like this!"

"I'm here for my god daughter, not for you!" Kimmy heard Aunt Rory say.

"And so am I!" Uncle Jess nearly yelled. Kimmy had never heard him speak like this before, he was so mean!

"Jess . . ."

"Listen Rory! I want- need to move on with my life, okay? I'm sorry if it's hard for me to be around you but that's just the way it is." Uncle Jess' voice had softened a little. "It's been so difficult . . ."

Kimmy barely made out Aunt Rory say, "Do you think I don't feel it too? Every time I look at you -"

"Don't," Uncle Jess cut her off. "Please. You're engaged. You're getting married!"

"Jess, please, let's not talk about that now."

"Rory, I just need my space."

"Okay."

Kimmy strained her ears to hear more, but it sounded as though they had stopped talking. It was completely silent, but then she heard something like a moan. Uncle Jess hit her! She jumped out of her hiding spot ready to scream but instantly fell silent.

Aunt Rory and Uncle Jess were locked in each other's arms. They were doing something with their lips that Kimmy thought would definitely be considered disgusting at her school. Kimmy watched as a tear fell down Aunt Rory's cheek, but Uncle Jess continued to kiss her and clutch her tightly with such force that Kimmy was sure he was hurting her.

He should not be hurting her! "Uncle Jess!" Kimmy screamed careening toward them. "Stop hurting her!"

They jumped apart with surprise as Kimmy hurtled herself around Aunt Rory's legs. "Can't you see that you were hurting her?!" She yelled at him in an accusing voice, "Why were you hurting her? Don't you love her anymore?"

He stepped back as and ran his hands through his hair desperately. His face contorted painfully, "I'm sorry." He whispered.

Rory leaned down to the distressed Kimmy, "He wasn't hurting me babe."

Kimmy shook her head and wiped at the tear trail on Rory's cheek, "You were crying! He was yelling!"

Jess was shaking his head also, "I am. I am." He said in disbelief.

"Jess . . ." Rory trailed off staring up at him

He ran another hand through his hair, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." He turned to Rory, he stared at her swollen lips that he had just held against his moments ago. He couldn't think, he couldn't think. "I can't do this anymore . . ."

Kimmy stared up at her Uncle Jess. What was he talking about? She had never seen him this way.

"Don't come near me anymore." Jess backed away further still as though afraid of what she might do. "I can't see you. Not again."

Rory stood up and held out her hand to him, "Jess, please." Her voice choked. "Don't do this, not to me."

He stepped back away from her, scared of her touch. "I can't see you anymore. I just can't. I can't see you. " His voice was hard and distant, he shook his head again, "Just let me be."

Kimmy watched as he walked away from them. They both flinched as they heard a car door slam and the engine start. She watched as her Aunt Rory let herself fall to the ground and stare blankly into space.

What was happening??

I hope you liked this chapter, please REVIEW!!

AN: I have a question for everyone, and if you know the answer it would be great if you could let me know. About six months ago I read this Literai on Fanfiction.net and I haven't been able to find it since. In this story Rory has never lived in Stars Hollow because Lorelai married Christopher when she became pregnant. And it's about how one day Rory skips school and goes to Stars Hollow with her friends, including Tristan, and there she finds Jess. They have this special connection and Rory can't figure out what it is, but she starts getting flashes of what her life would have been like had she moved to Stars Hollow as a baby with her mother. Anyway, I really loved this fic, it was written SO well, but I can't find it at all. So if anyone has any idea of what I'm talking about please let me know!!!!!!!!!!