Chapter two: HOLY CRAP! I FORGOT MY DEXY!! Damn. There it is.
Lexiss lay, on the ground, her face slammed into the dirt. She picked her head up, and spat out the bit of dirt that actually managed to get in. "Ouch," was the only word she said.
"Do you need some help?" A hand reached down to her. Lexiss looked up at its owner. She had creamy skin, and straight red hair that was pulled back into a ponytail. Her eyes were grey, and she had glasses on. She was wearing blue jeans (like Lexiss) and a dark grey tank top. On her feet were red sneakers.
"Who are you?" Lexiss asked the strange girl. "And how did you get here?" She grasped at the hand, and hauled herself up. The strange girl smiled.
"Same way you did! After sending too many kids (who shouldn't have come here in the first place) to count, you would think that Saruman would've realized that's not going to bring him back from Bubble Land." (He's pushed HOW MANY KIDS into MIDDLE-EARTH?!!) She laughed at the irony of their situation. "I'm Ashley," she added. "Welcome to Mirkwood…" she prompted her for her name.
"Lexiss," she replied, and looked around nervously. "There aren't any spiders around here. Are there?" she asked, both of the girls shuddered.
"No, no, we got 'em pretty quickly," Ashley assured her. Lexiss visibly relaxed, and laughed excitedly.
"Okay, then!" she began running. "Let's go bother someone!" Ashley gave her a weird look. Lexiss stopped and looked back. "Oh yeah. I have ADD," she added, as if it wasn't important, and began running again. She laughed excitedly, and it echoed through the trees, causing several somethings in them to move, and follow her.
Ashley stood there for a second, blinking, and then ran after Lexiss. 'I've got to warn her!' she thought nervously.
~*~
Lexiss ran in the dark, streaking past trees, and laughing all the way. She didn't even see the net in front of her, until she had run into it, and was well tangled.
"Now I know how a fly feels," she muttered irritably as she took a step, and promptly fell face first (she does fall that way a lot, doesn't she?) in the dirt. Within minutes, she was surrounded by Elves, all of who were armed, but not threatening her.
"Oh no," one of them groaned. "Not another one!"
"When will Saruman realize that this will never give him a way back?" another asked.
"And why did the Free People decide to have them stay here?" a third added.
The most responsible one picked up an end of the net, and handed it to one of the (obviously) younger Elves. "You carry this end, and you take this end," he handed the other end to one of the other two.
Lexiss wriggled, and resembled a very large, very…strange, earthworm. "I CAN WALK!" she shouted. "LET ME OUT OF HERE!!"
"I'm sorry," the responsible one said, "but we must take you to the others."
"'The others'?" the girl grinned from inside the netting. "Is that like the movie starring Nicole Kidman?"
The Elf gave her a weird look, and signaled to the others to start walking. Ashley chose that time to run in. The Elf looked at her, and her eyes grew wide.
"Shit!" she started to run, but the Elf tackled her, and tied her ankles together, and then her wrists, and then slung her over his shoulder.
"What a productive day," he said lightly. "We caught a new one, and a runaway."
"Ash," Lexiss said slowly, "what's going on?" Ashley grinned sheepishly.
"I tried to tell you that the random children that Saruman had dropped here were beginning to become such a nuisance that they were being held in specially made pens in Mirkwood, but you ran off too fast," she replied. "And what was that that you said you had?"
"ADD," she said promptly. "Attention Deficit Disorder. Don't ask for the symptoms, it takes too long, and you wouldn't want to know."
"Most likely," one of the Elves carrying the net said. "Now SHUT UP IN THERE!" Lexiss giggled excitedly as if someone had tickled her.
"You Elves have the weirdest way of saying 'shut up'! Don't they, Ashley?" The girl nodded.
"You get used to it after the first few days of it, and it loses its humorous quality, though."
"Damn!"
The responsible Elf closed his eyes momentarily, as if they were trying his patience. "Girls, be quiet."
"Why?" Lexiss asked in a perfect impression of Mindy from Animaniacs.
"The prince is hunting nearby."
"Why?" Ashley joined her in.
"Because this is where he has the best luck."
"Why?" They repeated in unison.
"Because you don't need to ask that stupid—" he was cut off by the two girls laughing at how he said 'stupid'. He sighed angrily.
"Are we there yet?" Lexiss asked, a huge grin plastered over her face.
"Indeed," the Elf replied, and he nodded to the two holding the net. They nodded back, and tossed the net, Lexiss and all, down a hole. "We are."
"HOLY CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!" Lexiss screamed as she tried to claw her way out of the net. Then Ashley caught up to her. She looked perfectly normal. There was a sharp Snap! above them, and it was pitch black inside. Lexiss started freaking out.
"It'll be okay," she assured Lexiss. "This is how we get to the holding pens." Lexiss looked at her as if she was insane. "Trust me! This has happened to me dozens of times!"
Then the two of them landed in a huge pile of dry leaves. Promptly, they were lifted out, and their bonds were cut off of them.
"Welcome to Eighth Hell!" a voice said. "It's good to see you again, Ashley!"
Ashley grinned. "Hey, Chris. This is Lexiss." Lexiss shook his hand. "How are we doing?"
"Three more teens, and five little kids escaped in the past week," he replied. "They haven't caught any of them yet." Ashley nodded satisfactory.
"So we're rebelling against being held underground against our will, and not being able to run around freely?" Lexiss asked curiously. Chris nodded.
"That, and some of the weirder fangirls have been complaining about not being able to glomp Legolas or Frodo or a member of the Fellowship besides Gimli," he added. Lexiss smirked.
"Not me!" she said happily. "I JUST WANT TO TORTURE SOME ELVES FOR KEEPING ME DOWN HERE WHEN I'M CLAUSTROPHOBIC!" she shuddered. "That, and I'd love to torture the Fellowship and all the inhabitants of Rivendell!" she grinned excitedly, and then shuddered again. Chris gave Ashley a questioning look.
"She has ADD," she explained.
"Oh."
"YEP!" she grinned again, but at the same time, they could see goose bumps on her arms. "Can we get out of here now?"
"There's practically no way out that they haven't blocked after we've used 'em," Chris began to explain. There was a rustle of dry leaves, and no response from Lexiss. "Lexiss?" There was still no response. He turned around, and saw her actually climbing up the way that they had come in!
"Lexiss!" he shouted, and ran to the tunnel. Ashley turned around just in time to see her feet disappear.
"LEXISS!" she ran over there as well. From the gloom above, they heard a slight giggle, and some scrambling.
"LOOKITME!" she called down. "I found another way out!"
"It isn't safe!" Ashley called back up. "Just drop down!"
"No one's coming!" Lexiss replied. "I'll be fine!"
"I wouldn't count on it," Chris muttered. "I bet she falls, and another kid in a net falls on top of her."
Ashley glared at him. "Stop that. LEXISS! This might actually work. PLEASE COME BACK DOWN!"
There was no response. (Really? Yes, really; now shut up. Yes'm.) They stood there in silence, waiting to see what happened. A few minutes later, they heard a sound of someone scrabbling, and some dirt fell a few feet of them. They heard a wooden creak, and a quick Snap!
Chris looked at Ashley. Both of them were wide-eyed. She'd made it. They didn't think she'd be able to, but she made it!
"Whoa!" they said at the same time.
A second later, there was another snapping sound, and Lexiss dropped onto the leaves giggling. They stared at her, confused.
"Were there guards up there?" Chris asked. Lexiss shook her head, still grinning.
"Nope! I just went through to see if I could do it, and now I know I can get out," she replied, as if this kind of thing happened to her all the time. Then she started giggling again (she finds a lot of things funny, doesn't she?) at their stunned faces.
"Lexiss, you could have been able to get us all out of here if you'd stayed up there!" Again, the girl shook her head.
"Uh, uh! If I'd stayed up there, eventually they'd figure out that I'd used that way for an exit, and they'd destroy that one, and make a new entrance into this stupid cave!" For once, she sounded totally responsible.
Then Chris was about to say something, when Lexiss said something again.
"But I'm bored down here…in the gloom…" she shuddered, "so I'm going back up there anyway!" And then she began to crawl up the walls again, clutching self-made hand and footholds as she made her way up. (She's starting to remind me of Smeagol…)
Ashley looked at Chris. Chris looked at Ashley.
"What do we do about her?" he asked. She shrugged.
"MY TURN!" a little boy about four years old ran past the two, and began climbing up after Lexiss, giggling. They heard Lexiss giggling with him further up.
"Ash-lee?" a seven-year-old girl said. "What's going on? Why's the hole gig-gling?" Ashley rolled her eyes and smiled at the thought of the tunnel laughing. (Spooky…)
"The new girl here has ADD," she started, "so when she got bored, she decided to find her way out, and she found a way to get out by climbing back up there."
A group of kids ranging, from ages four to seventeen (is that even a kid??), by now had gathered around them.
"She found a new way out?" a wild-eyed ten-year-old asked hopefully. "You mean that a new kid got out on her first try?" Chris nodded.
There was a sudden cry coming from the hole, and silence fell. All eyes turned to the opening. Some loose dirt fell, and there was another cry.
"It's okay, kid!" they heard Lexiss say. "I gotcha! I'm not letting go! Do you feel that hand hold to your left?" there was silence followed by a soft whimper. "Okay, I'm going to try to swing you over there, and you need to grab it. I'm not letting go until you've got a firm grip to the wall."
There was silence for several long minutes. They heard some scuffling, and some more dirt fell.
"Do you have it?" Lexiss asked softly (but they could hear because her voice because the tunnel made her voice echo). The boy sniffled a little. "Kid, do you have it?"
"Uh huh," he said nervously.
"All right, I'm going to let go, and I want you to drop onto the leaves." There was a stunned silence. "You'll be okay now. Trust me."
A few seconds later, they boy dropped onto the leaves. Many of the children surrounded him, and pulled him out. Ashley leaned forward and looked into the pitch black.
"Lexiss?" she called up. "Are you going to come back?"
There was silence. "Did he make it?" she called back.
"Yeah, he's fine."
"I'm not going back down there. I'm claustrophobic, and I will NOT be held UNDERGROUND!" There was yet another Snap and silence.
A sixteen-year-old boy raised his arms for attention. "PLACE YOUR BETS NOW, PEOPLE!" he shouted. "SHE'LL BE BACK IN TEN MINUTES!" (*waves handful of cash* I BETCHA SHE'LL BE BACK IN FIVE MINUTES!)
A couple of the more hopeful kids snorted, and ignored him. Several of the boys placed their bets, along with some girls, while the rest of the girls told them how immature that was. Several of the younger ones were trying to figure out how Lexiss had gotten up there.
Chris leaned against the wall with crossed arms and looked at Ashley. "When do you think they'll catch her?"
"Never, if we're lucky."
"Hasn't happened yet."
Ashley shrugged. "Well, maybe our luck's finally come in."
"What makes you so confident?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Have you even read an LotR fic?"
"Not recently."
"Well, from what I've read, there hasn't been one fic with a girl in it that has ADD. She does."
"Your point being? This isn't some fic, Ash. This is real life!" (Yeah. Riiiiiiight… WHAT DID I TELL YOU?!! *shuts up*)
"Well, give her a chance! Let's wait until we first see her get thrown back before we say that her mentality has nothing to do with it!"
"Deal."
~*~
Lexiss crawled out of the hole, and closed it gently, and heard it snap from the inside. 'Ah ha,' she thought, "they've rigged it up so we can't get out.' She thought about that, and smothered a giggle.
"What are you doing near the children pens?" a young voice asked. Lexiss turned around, and found herself staring into a pair of clear, innocent, light blue eyes, framed by silvery blonde hair. It was an elf child. Lexiss grinned and put her finger to her lips.
"Shhh," she whispered. "I'm…playing Hide and Seek!" she nodded like Bilbo did at the party scene when he's telling the Hobbit children the story about his adventure with the Trolls. The elf child cocked his head curiously.
"Aren't you one of the human children that Saruman sent here?" he asked, not bothering to whisper. Lexiss shook her head violently.
"Nooooo," she whispered, "I'm from the West!" she told her.
"You don't sound like you're from the West," the child replied. "How can I be sure that you really aren't one of the children that Saruman sent here?"
"Instinct, my dear," she said coolly, quoting the movie "To Wong Fu, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar", "and exquisite wit. If you're going to—" she clapped her hands over her mouth.
"If I'm going to what?" the boy asked suspiciously.
"If you're going to play, you have to trust me, and keep quiet," Lexiss covered. The child didn't seem convinced. He crossed his arms and gave her a look that said he didn't believe me.
"Do you honestly think I'm that stupid?" he asked. Lexiss clamped her hands over her mouth to keep from laughing at the way he said 'stupid'. It sounded so much funnier when the elf child said it!
"No?" she replied, trying to keep from squeaking with restrained laughter.
"Do you want me to yell?" he asked, and began taking in a deep breath of air. Lexiss threw herself on top of him, and practically hugged his head so he wouldn't yell.
"All right, all right!" I whispered angrily. "If I tell you the truth, will you leave me alone and let me get out of here?" He grinned.
"You realize that by tackling me, you just made enough noise to alert most elves nearby?" he asked.
"Shit!" I jumped up, and began running all out.
"It's another one!" she heard an elf call out to his friend. She grinned at the thought of racing the elves and seeing if she could actually win. She put on an extra burst of speed, and sprinted as fast as she could. She glanced back, and saw at least three elves on her tail. Her grin grew to one of pure pleasure, and she laughed at the excitement of it all.
THE HUNT WAS ON!!
~*~
Back in 'Eighth Hell', Ashley was leaning against a wall, watching the younger kids crowd around the gate where they got fed, and wondered if Lexiss had actually made it.
"Make way!" a few elves were coming in, and they were carrying what looked like a large sack. The kids backed off, leaving a large, crescent-shaped space free for them.
Ashley called a boy about thirteen over. He was fairly tall, and pretty strong. Not too fast, but strong. And he was smart.
"What's going on?" she muttered. He shrugged his shoulders.
"The bag's wriggling, so I'm assuming that they caught the new girl," he said. They watched the elves dump the bag and leave quickly. The bag did wriggle, and soon, a girl with springy, orange-red hair popped out of the bag, looking slightly dazed, and had an almost dreamy expression on her face.
"That's not Lexiss," Ashley commented.
"No, that's Kelly," he replied. "She got out a couple of days ago." For the first time since Lexiss had left, Ashley smiled.
"We may actually have a chance here," she said, sounding more hopeful than she had in a long time.
~*~
Lexiss sat, wedged between some rocks, waiting for the elves to pass her. She had taken a swift turn, and almost lost them, but a sixth sense told her they were coming. Within seconds, she heard a voice directly above her.
"You, look over there, and you, that way. She couldn't have gone far." There was an elf standing on the rock she was under! She grinned at the irony of what he just said. She tried hard not to wriggle, and laugh, even though she wanted to badly (Oh, boy! Did she ever!).
There was a pause, and she even stopped breathing, waiting for them to decide she wasn't there. She wondered if they could hear her heart pounding as loudly as she could.
"Got you!" an Elf dragged her out of her hiding spot (Evidently, they could.). She threw her foot in his face, breaking his nose. He let go of her, and grabbed his nose. She took the opportunity, and ran off again.
"FREEDOM!" she shouted, mocking a movie she didn't even remember the name to. She jumped in the air, and continued running while the elves made sure their friend was all right.
Lexiss, by now, was gasping for air (You have to realize, that even though she's extremely hyper, and has ADD, she is also lazy, and doesn't like running.). She tried her hardest to gasp as quietly as she could, and she succeeded for a while. She stopped for a second to catch her breath (it had gotten away from her, you see), and she noticed that there weren't any Elves nearby trying to capture her. She looked at the trees surrounding her, wondering if they were there, but just keeping quiet. She took two quiet steps forward, and saw a trip wire in her path. A bush giggled quietly, and wriggled slightly. She skipped lightly to that bush, reached in, and yanked something up.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!" it was the Elf child, and she had him by the silky hair.
"What the hell are you doing?!" she growled in her throat, yanking at his hair. He winced again, but didn't make a sound. "What are you doing?" she tried again, in a softer, more dangerous tone. He still didn't say anything. She sighed angrily. "Look, you spoiled little asshole, all I'm trying to do is get away from those damn caves. I'm claustrophobic, and I'm just trying to talk to your goddamn king, to see if I can get at least better living conditions for the 'children', as you call us, even though I know I'm older than you are, you snotty, vertically challenged, brat!" (I'm glad I don't know this person!) she looked him in the eye, practically wishing that she could shoot daggers from them. "Now, tell me. What were you doing trying to trip me up?"
He looked subdued. "I was trying to help the other Elves," he replied simply. "They're trying to catch you, I thought I could help them catch you!"
Lexiss let go of his hair, and gripped his shoulder tightly. "Work on your stealth, elfo," she said, her voice slightly calmer. "If you don't want me to be royally pissed, take me to your king, now." The Elf child took the hint, and immediately began walking quickly.
~*~
Legolas was just taking a peaceful walk when he heard something. He reached for his bow and fitted an arrow to it, just in time to see an Elf child come out of the trees, followed by a very cranky looking human child. He gave the child a strange look. The child tensed up.
"Eruner, mani laa lle umien?"* he asked, sternly. The Elf child (now to be known as Eruner) avoided his eyes. "Ya naa tanya?"**
Eruner looked up at Lexiss for help. She looked down at him and back up at Legolas silently. Her hand on his shoulder tightened momentarily, letting him know she had no intention of getting him out of this.
"Edan,"*** he replied quickly. Legolas sighed, looked at Lexiss warily to see if she'd rush him the way other girls had, but when she didn't budge, he relaxed ever so slightly.
"Amin sinta mani re naa,"**** he said, taking a step forward, and glancing at Lexiss to she what she'd do.
"What's going on?" she asked suddenly. The child loosened up a little bit, relieved that he'd been taken off the hook. "What are you talking about?" she continued. "Don't you know that it's rude to have a conversation that the rest of your company, welcome or not (not, in my case), can't understand?"
"I was asking who you were," he replied. "You are obviously a human child, and one that Saruman sent here." Lexiss nodded, confirming what she said, but the cranky look never left her face.
"That's right, I'm human, I'm a child, my name is Lexiss, Saruman the Idiot sent me here, your Elves threw me into a giant underground pit (and I am claustrophobic), I have ADD, I have been chased, and I'm tired, and I. Am. PISSED. OFF!!" she glared at him angrily. Then, in a much calmer tone she added: "Fortunately for me, though, my little friend here," she patted Eruner's shoulder, "happened to be nearby, and offered to take me to the royalty around here, so I could get either freedom for the poor kids that Saruman the Stupid sent here, or at least better living conditions!"
Legolas blinked. Some of the girls he had encountered had talked this much, and more, but when he was around, it was usually about him. There was something different about this girl…
"Well?" she snapped impatiently, "aren't you going to say anything?"
"All right…Lexiss…?" he asked, trying to confirm that it was her name. She nodded once. "I'm sure that one of the children down there has told you that they began to become nuisances, which is why we brought them here—"
"—and threw 'em in caves, restricted their freedom, given them the idea to become more annoying by escaping, which is more of a hassle for you, as is putting them back." Lexiss finished, seriously. Eruner tried to get out of Lexiss's grasp, but as she felt him shift, she subconsciously tightened her grip, so he couldn't get away.
"Haven't I done what you asked?" he said, looking up at Lexiss pleadingly. She looked down at him.
"Yes you did," she replied. "And you tried to get me thrown back down into my version of Elvin-made Hell twice," she added. "You're staying with me until we get our rights!" Eruner inwardly groaned. If anything, he didn't want to be stuck around her forever! She looked back up at Legolas. "So," she said, "What are you going to do? You've heard our demands, and if you have any, you'd better get them out right now, or I'll just find out where all the holding pens are, I'll get every kid out, and all Hell will break loose. No joke."
Legolas nodded. "Before I do, though," he said, "I had a strange dream last night, where Saruman gave me a strange bottle, and told me to give it to 'Lexiss'. And since that is you, here it is." He dropped a small, white bottle into her hand. She looked down at it, and saw this word: Dextroamphetamine.
"Damn," she muttered. "It's my dexy."
A/N: Wow. Lexiss sure is serious in this chapter! But she, like me, knows when she can't act up, no matter how much she'd like it. I'm sorry if I offended anyone anywhere within this chapter.
Translations—*Eruner, what are you doing?
**Who is that?
***Human
****I know what she is.
