I DON'T OWN ANYTHING! YOU CAN'T SUE ME! MWAHAHAAHAHA!

*Clark runs through the hallway of Smallville high at superfast superspeed*

Viewers: Hmmm. He must be wearing Nikes.

Clark: Wheeee!!! Running, Running, Running. I should be in track! Grrr! No, no, no! Even with my superpowers I somehow can't make it to school on time and now my locker is jammed! *Clark kicks locker, creating a giant dent*

Random Teacher shows up

Teacher: You could have just used the combination.

Lana: Hey Clark. Whitney is dead and you still haven't asked me out even though I obviously like you. Now I must have a crush on the obvious villain so that you will become jealous.

Lana FLIRTS non-stop with an OBVIOUS villain.

Clark: Stop it. He really is evil.

Lana: To provide a plotline I will ignore you and just accuse you of being jealous.

Chloe: I am still obsessed with yet I have a strong fear of rejection since you keep licking Lana's shoes. I will research on the internet and find out some strange impossible power that he possesses that will be linked to kryptonite exposure.

Writers: YES! He will be able to... Set things on fire! It's a brilliant idea!

Viewers: Ummm, It's called MATCHES? Hello?

Writers: .......................

Pete: Hello. I am your best friend but I don't really do anything.

Clark: *Looks up from licking Lana's shoes* Did you say something?

Lana: Stop it. These are Prada's.

Clark: Fine. Wait...*looks at watch* aren't you supposed to have been kidnapped by the obvious villain five minutes ago?

Obvious Villain: Sorry. I was getting some soda. *Stares at soda*

Lana: Oh! The sensitivity! I wonder what deep, meaningful thoughts he's thinking right now....

Obvious Villain: Wow. Look at all those bubbles. Lots and lots of bubbles.

Lana: *sighs dreamily*

Obvious Villain: Oh um yea. *sets some random things on fire and knocks out Lana with a two by four*

Reba: Hey ya'll!

Obvious Villain: Tries to set Reba on fire

Rory and Milo: *making out in hallway*

Clark: What are you doing here on our set?

Rory: I think we share the same hallway set but anyways...

Chloe: HEY CLARK! I FOUND SOME STUFF! HE'S FROM THE FUTURE AND HE CAN SET THINGS ON FIRE!

Random flaming objects: Yeah. We noticed.

Clark: Oh no where's Lana? Did you just say something Chloe?

Chloe: Whatever. Get yourself flamed like a bad fanfic. See if I care.

Clark: I must save her!

Whoooo! Wheeeeeeeeeee! Goes through corn field at super fast superspeed. Oops. Passed her. *goes back*

Clark: Hey! Hands off her!

Obvious Villain: Okay. I'm not really sure why I'm doing this anyway.

Clark: ......

Clark: Um... This wasn't in the script. Oh well.

*Clark punches the guy and sends him flying fifty feet. Ouch*

Lana: Oh! I'll always trust you from now on! *hugs!*

Audience: Riiiggggghht....Dump her Clark.

Clark: *hugs*

Audience: *smacks themselves in the forehead*

*School Dance*

Audience: Exactly how many dances does this place have?

Clark: *Looks at Lana regretfully* she'll never go out with me. Sigh.

Chloe: *Looks at Clark regretfully* why do I even bother?

Lana: *Looks at Clark regretfully* why the heck won't you ask me out?

Pete: *Looks at CD regretfully* maybe I should've gone with a green cover...

Lex: *Looks in mirror regretfully* You'd think that with all my money I could afford a wig.

COMERCIAL

SCENES FROM OUR NEXT SHOW... AND NOW... ITS FAMILY AFFAIR!

Audience: *Screams*

THE END

Okay! I love smallville and I have nothing against it okay? Please don't hurt me! *cowers* Okay anywho If you're reading this you probably read my story so please tell me what you think and review!