The Visit (9/?)
Chapter 9
The group sat in a circle, books surrounding them, the box in the middle.
Wesley opened it, and paused, taking in its contents. He swallowed hard for a second, before pushing back all his emotions and pulling out what lay inside.
"What are those?" Willow asked, pointing to the large envelopes
Fred opened them, and pulled out black sheets. They were all dated.
"X-rays of her brain. Catscans," she said to them, and studied them carefully.
Wesley was looking at the various pill bottles lying loose in the bag.
"I can't believe we didn't know," Gunn said.
"It looks really bad," Wesley said, "These are strong stuff. Really strong."
"I remember reading about some of these during Watcher Training," Giles agreed with Wesley, as he took a few bottles in his hand and studied them.
"Humans are not suppose to receive the visions. They are not meant for them," Anya told them. Wesley began handing out books.
"What do you mean, Anya?" Xander turned to ask his girlfriend. He was having a hard time taking all of this in.
"I don't know much about it, but I can only remember two humans that received them, and it didn't turn out good for them," Anya said.
"What happened to them?" Wesley asked, a bad feeling in his gut.
"The back of their skulls blew out," Anya said. The room flinched, "Both died less than a year after they received them."
"A year?" Buffy said, "Doesn't Cordy have them for over two years already?" She looked at Wesley for an answer. She didn't even notice her use of Cordelia's nickname.
"Yes she does," he replied absent-mindedly paging through some books.
"I found it," Giles shouted next to him, "Cordelia has a post-it here, she must have read all this already," he said, rapidly reading it, "It says…" he trailed of, his expression waning.
"Says what, man?" Gunn asked impatiently. Giles looked up, and faced him.
"Not good. What Anya said, it happened. Their brains blew out. No cure," he answered sadly.
"Well, I refuse to accept that," Fred said firmly, grabbing Gunn's hand, and giving him support.
"I agree. Cordy lasted this long with them," Willow said, nodding furiously.
"Yes, she did," Giles agreed, "Don't know how she did though. According to this, humans aren't meant to last longer than a…"
"Don't talk like that," Buffy snapped, "She Cordelia. Not some human."
"I'm sorry," Giles apologised, "Its just that, I think she has found a way to deal with it. To somehow move through it. Its pretty severe, and she hid it from all of you for so long."
"I guess even Barbie isn't strong enough to hide it forever," Gunn said sadly.
"And even princesses can't delay the inevitable," Lorne added.
"It isn't inevitable," Xander protested fiercely, "Don't ever say that. We'll start looking, and we'll find it," his voice dropped several decibels, "We always do."
There was a moment of silence, then Wesley said strongly, "We'll go over everything. I know Cordy said that she already researched, but maybe we'll find something new, that she missed. Fred, you take the computers, Lorne, Gunn go out and check out your contacts. We'll make Cordy sing for you as soon as she gets back. Willow, see if you can find some healing spells, or something. Spike, you and Buffy go and check out the Magic Shops in LA – Spike you know where they are, right? Anya, you and Giles hit the books with me, and Xander…" Wesley stopped his list of his instructions, thinking for a second, "Xander…you go do whatever it is you do," he finished up. No one thought to question the orders, a scene so different from just a few years ago.
Fred was already in front of the computer, while Willow had her laptop on her lap, and a bunch of wicca books around her. She was on the phone, speaking to Tara, explaining the situation. Spike grabbed his coat, helped Buffy with hers, and the two of them headed out, Lorne and Gunn following them.
The rest opened books, searching for a clue, or anything that would help, that could save her.
It was a long night, a depressing one, where very little seemed to give any hope. Xander helped with books, ran errands, and brought food regularly. He made at least four trips to the all-night café at the corner to buy tacos for Fred.
A couple hours after the research began, Angel and Cordy walked back into the hotel, the sleeping baby in Cordy's arms, while Angel had his arm wrapped protectively around her waist.
Wesley and Giles, with Angel standing silently in the background immediately interrogated Cordelia, getting every detail out of her, of the doctors prognosis, of the research, of the people she had asked for help, about everything. She answered all their questions, and then hugged Wesley he finally realized that she had tried everything, and nothing had been found.
When she covered a yawn with her hand, Angel insisted she go up to bed and sleep. For once, she didn't argue. He escorted her upstairs. When he came back down, he grabbed his sword, and headed for the door.
"Where are you going?" Wesley's voice stopped him.
"To make it stop," Angel replied without turning around.
"You're going to the PTB," Wesley stated.
"Yes, I got the location from Lorne," he said.
"You know she won't be happy when she finds out," Wesley told him.
"She'll be alive. That's all that matters," Angel returned. He looked at Wesley in the eyes, "Are you going to stop me?"
Wesley considered it for a second, "No," he answered slowly, and deliberately, "She can be furious as she wants, so long as she's alive."
"She's all that matters," Angel agreed, nodding solemnly.
"Okay, then," Wesley turned and walked back into his office, and
Angel walked out the door.
Xander watched the entire exchange, before he turned too, walked up to his girlfriend, and wrapped her in his arms, "Did I tell you today, Anya that I love you?" he whispered softly in her ear.
"Not in the last hour, no," she moved her head and met his lips halfway, kissing him softly, "I love you too, Xander. She's going to be fine, we'll find it," she reassured him.
"I know," he leaned against her.
The room quieted again, where the only sounds were the rustling of pages, and the occasional beep from the computers.
Spike and Buffy were the first to return. The two of them had visited every magic store that they knew existed, waking many of the owners up in their quest, and after a night of hearing wiccans and healers all over the city show no hope, they both looked slightly demolished.
Lorne returned with Gunn soon after. They, too didn't look happy having had to return empty handed as well.
Angel stumbled in a few hours later. He was bruised and pretty beat up, and didn't look good. With the intuition she was known for, when it came to the ensouled vampire, it was at this point that Cordelia decided to come down the steps, just in time to watch her vampire collapse on the lobby stairs.
"What happened?" she cried in panic, rushing to his side. Everyone sprang into action, Fred grabbing the first aid kit and Gunn getting blood from the fridge. Spike and Wesley lifted the limp vampire up and placed him on the couch where Cordelia started cleaning him up, all the while lecturing over getting hurt, while Angel just lay there and let her do her thing. The Scoobies watched, having never seen this side of her, of him before.
"I'm sorry," Angel said to her, catching and holding her eye.
"What did you do, Angel?" she asked him, knowing the answer already.
"I had to, Cor. I can't lose you. I just can't," his voice was desperate. He didn't even seem to notice his injuries, or the pain.
"I told you not to," she said, her expression stern, belied by the gentle touch of her hands touching and healing his injuries.
"I know," he told her, "I had to try."
"And now you know," she said. It was the finality in her voice that had a tear seeping out his eye. She reached up with her fingers and tenderly cleared it a way.
"Okay, then. You need sleep. Come on, lets get you to bed," she said firmly, her voice normal again.
"I don't want to," he replied petulantly, sounding very much like a little boy who was told it was his bedtime.
"You want to do stupid things, now you have to pay for them," she said unrepentantly, "Spike, help him up, and make sure he stays there," she ordered the other vampire.
Spike immediately followed her orders. It was the tone, the one that booked no argument that had him moving. Angel, allowed himself, newly bandaged to be helped up the stairs, pouting the entire way.
"Come with me," Angel requested, as he leaned on Spike at the head of the stairs.
She turned to face him and smiled softly, "In a minute, okay."
The pout turned into a grin, as the two vampires disappeared from sight.
Cordelia turned to face Wesley, "You let him go?" It was phrased as a question, but it wasn't one.
Wesley stood his ground this time, "Yes."
Cordelia opened her mouth to yell at him, but looked into his sorrow-filled eyes, and changed her mind, "Now you know," was all she said. She left to wash her hands.
"Okay, what happened here, did I miss something big, English?" Gunn looked at Wesley for confirmation. The Scoobies looked equally confused.
"Angel went to see someone called the PTB," Xander answered when it appeared that Wesley was lost in thought.
"Oh," Fred and Gunn said in unison, as if that explained everything. They both went back to their books.
"What do you mean oh," Willow asked, curiously.
"PTB's are the Powers that Be," Fred told them.
"Oh," Buffy said. She paused for a beat, "So…"
"So…they aren't the easiest beings to see. Angel isn't the most patient of champions, and Cordy dying isn't the best of situations," Wesley said, "He went to them to make them take the visions away."
"Oh," Xander said this time.
"I take it the answer was no," Buffy asked.
"What do you think?" Gunn said sarcastically, referring to the rather beat-up situation Angel returned in.
"How did Cordelia know where Angel went?" Anya asked.
"She knows Angel, better than anyone else," Wesley replied, "Especially after last year."
"What happened last year?" Willow asked.
"Remember when Angel slept with Darla, well after he came back, Cordelia told him, they weren't friends anymore," Wesley started.
"Angel panicked, it was actually quite funny, looking back," Gunn took over from Wesley.
Wesley started again, "He wanted our forgiveness, but hers…he needed hers. When she forgave him, Angel finally figured out he had been taking her for granted before. They started talking. He would tell her things I don't think he ever told anyone before," Wesley said to the curious onlookers.
"Its also why he can't conceive losing her," Gunn finished sadly, "And when he started falling for her."
A shaky voice interrupted the conversation, "Why does Cordy have CATscans?" The group turned to see a slight girl, holding the black sheets in her hands.
Buffy opened her mouth to reply, but nothing came out.
Dawn asked the question again, more insistently. The Scoobies exchanged looks. They didn't know how to answer.
"Why does Cordy have CATscans?" Dawn yelled this time. At the corner of the stairs Spike could be seen, rushing down at the sound of it. "She's going to die, isn't she? Like Mum," Dawn stated, looking at Buffy. Her face answered the question for the young girl.
"Mum had CATscans too. And she died." She dropped the X-rays. They fell silently, almost in slow motion to the ground. Everyone watched the movement, no one knowing quite what to do. Dawn turned suddenly and took off.
Right into Cordy, who was coming from the bathroom
"Woah there, Dawnie. Slow down or you are going to hit something," Cordy grabbed the distraught girl, pulling her into her arms. Dawn didn't come easy. She began to hit the older girl with her tiny fists, causing Cordelia to catch hold of her hands.
Buffy, Spike, Willow, Anya, Giles and Xander all moved towards the two. Cordy held up her hand to stop them.
"Dawnie?" Cordy questioned gently.
"You can't die. Connor needs his mother. He has to have a mother. Children should have mothers," the girl cried out, before bursting into tears. Loud. Sobbing tears.
"I know, sweetie. And I know that you know that sometimes people die. Sometimes people have to leave," Cordy spoke to Dawn in soft even tones.
"Why? Why do people have to die? I don't want anyone else to leave, Cordy. Mum died. And Buffy. And now you," Dawn stopped struggling.
"I wish I could tell you, Dawnie. Sometime we can't explain why things happen. But I do know one thing," Cordy said.
"What?" Dawnie choked out.
"I believe in miracles," Cordy told her softly.
"How? How can you believe in miracles? You are going to die," the teen shouted the last bit at Cordelia.
"That part is easy," Cordelia replied, "I see them everyday."
"Everyday?" Dawn questioned, curious despite the anger she felt over things she couldn't control.
"Yes, everyday," Cordelia smiled gently at Dawn, "Connor is a miracle, Dawn. He was never supposed to have been born. The human son of two vampires. That's a miracle, Buffy coming back to you. That's a miracle, honey. Spike loving you, that's a miracle. And you know what else?"
"What?" the question was already less sullen, as the girl took in what Cordy said.
"You. You're a miracle. You didn't exist before, and now you're a baby sister, a friend, important. Loved. You, Dawn are special. A miracle, and we all know it."
"I am?"
"You are." The answer was sure. Confident.
"I wish you didn't have to die, Cordy," Dawnie told her, a tear escaping.
"Me, too, sweetie," Cordelia wrapped her arms around the younger girl.
"Can we bring you back? Like Buffy." She whispered against Cordelia's breast.
"No, honey. Buffy was special. But it isn't right to change the natural order of things. You of all people know that," Cordy said firmly, leaving no doubts in anyone's mind. Dawn glanced at Spike for a second, before nodding in agreement.
"Okay, Cordy."
"I want you do something for me, Dawnie. Something only you can do," Cordelia said to the girl, leaning back slightly to look at her.
"What?" Dawn sniffed.
"I need you to take my baby shopping."
"Shopping?" the girl giggled. It wasn't what she was expecting.
"You are my last hope, Dawn," Cordelia said seriously, "Angel will only have Connor wearing black, Spike will have my baby in leather. And we both know your sister has little fashion sense," Cordy sent a look to Buffy. It wasn't apologetic, or mean. Whatever it was, Buffy got it, and smiled back. Dawn laughed and nodded in agreement.
"And we both also know, Willow and Fred can't do, with the floral and the…," Cordelia waved her hands to explain, "Wesley and Xander are dorks, and Giles doesn't know how to shop for anything but tweed, that leaves you, Dawn. You can take Anya – she's got okay taste for an ex-demon, and Gunn, but don't let him buy those pants that look like they are going fall off any second," Cordelia continued, her face totally earnest. This was a serious matter.
"You can trust me, Cordy. I'll make sure Connor only wears the coolest clothes," Dawnie told her, just as grave. She already looked better. And she had stopped crying.
"Perfect. I was worrying about that," Cordelia smiled at the girl again, "I had better go. Got a crabby vampire upstairs who carries on worse than a baby when he's hurt," she told Dawn. Giving the teen one last hug, Cordy walked to the steps.
"Cor, you really think I'm really a miracle?" the soft voice stopped her.
Cordelia turned and gave the teen one of those smiles, the 100watt ones that had men walking into walls, "No, Dawnie. I don't think. I know. Ask anyone," she said.
"She's right, squirt. Barbie ain't never wrong," Gunn stated.
Dawn smiled. Her very own 100 watt smile.
"I am not a dork," Wesley protested a little belatedly.
"I don't only wear tweed," Giles defended.
Gunn sent them both disbelieving looks.
"I wanted a miracle speech. Why didn't I get one. I needed one," Xander asked the room, speaking to no-one in particular. He didn't question his dork-status, having heard it from Cordy before.
"Cordelia said I could take Connor shopping," Anya announced proudly to the room.
"Cos we're cool, and they're not. Right, squirt?" Gunn said.
"Right," Dawn giggled. She liked Gunn.
"I wanted a miracle-speech too. I think we should have got one," Willow said, agreeing with Xander.
"You can't have the miracle-speech. You're not a miracle," Dawn said to them, sounding sure.
"Why when I tell her she's special, I get a 'Yeah, right!' and sarcasm, but when Cordy tells her, she's all 'I'm a miracle now," Buffy asked.
"Cure. You're looking for a cure, right?" Dawn suddenly questioned, ignoring Buffy's question.
"Yes," Wesley told her.
"Well, go then," Dawn ordered, sounding remarkably like Cordelia for a second, "The quicker we find Cordy's miracle, the better," she said, and everyone scattered to their various places again, hope somehow restored.
TBC
a/n hey ppl
this is sort of an in between part, to deal with some of the stuff that didnt get taken care of in the previous parts. I hope u like the Dawn part...i feel quite sorry for her, having to deal with so much, but i don't quite know how to write her. I left her out, made her sleep (writer's perogative) earlier because i felt i couldn't do her justice then...hope this works
Domino
Chapter 9
The group sat in a circle, books surrounding them, the box in the middle.
Wesley opened it, and paused, taking in its contents. He swallowed hard for a second, before pushing back all his emotions and pulling out what lay inside.
"What are those?" Willow asked, pointing to the large envelopes
Fred opened them, and pulled out black sheets. They were all dated.
"X-rays of her brain. Catscans," she said to them, and studied them carefully.
Wesley was looking at the various pill bottles lying loose in the bag.
"I can't believe we didn't know," Gunn said.
"It looks really bad," Wesley said, "These are strong stuff. Really strong."
"I remember reading about some of these during Watcher Training," Giles agreed with Wesley, as he took a few bottles in his hand and studied them.
"Humans are not suppose to receive the visions. They are not meant for them," Anya told them. Wesley began handing out books.
"What do you mean, Anya?" Xander turned to ask his girlfriend. He was having a hard time taking all of this in.
"I don't know much about it, but I can only remember two humans that received them, and it didn't turn out good for them," Anya said.
"What happened to them?" Wesley asked, a bad feeling in his gut.
"The back of their skulls blew out," Anya said. The room flinched, "Both died less than a year after they received them."
"A year?" Buffy said, "Doesn't Cordy have them for over two years already?" She looked at Wesley for an answer. She didn't even notice her use of Cordelia's nickname.
"Yes she does," he replied absent-mindedly paging through some books.
"I found it," Giles shouted next to him, "Cordelia has a post-it here, she must have read all this already," he said, rapidly reading it, "It says…" he trailed of, his expression waning.
"Says what, man?" Gunn asked impatiently. Giles looked up, and faced him.
"Not good. What Anya said, it happened. Their brains blew out. No cure," he answered sadly.
"Well, I refuse to accept that," Fred said firmly, grabbing Gunn's hand, and giving him support.
"I agree. Cordy lasted this long with them," Willow said, nodding furiously.
"Yes, she did," Giles agreed, "Don't know how she did though. According to this, humans aren't meant to last longer than a…"
"Don't talk like that," Buffy snapped, "She Cordelia. Not some human."
"I'm sorry," Giles apologised, "Its just that, I think she has found a way to deal with it. To somehow move through it. Its pretty severe, and she hid it from all of you for so long."
"I guess even Barbie isn't strong enough to hide it forever," Gunn said sadly.
"And even princesses can't delay the inevitable," Lorne added.
"It isn't inevitable," Xander protested fiercely, "Don't ever say that. We'll start looking, and we'll find it," his voice dropped several decibels, "We always do."
There was a moment of silence, then Wesley said strongly, "We'll go over everything. I know Cordy said that she already researched, but maybe we'll find something new, that she missed. Fred, you take the computers, Lorne, Gunn go out and check out your contacts. We'll make Cordy sing for you as soon as she gets back. Willow, see if you can find some healing spells, or something. Spike, you and Buffy go and check out the Magic Shops in LA – Spike you know where they are, right? Anya, you and Giles hit the books with me, and Xander…" Wesley stopped his list of his instructions, thinking for a second, "Xander…you go do whatever it is you do," he finished up. No one thought to question the orders, a scene so different from just a few years ago.
Fred was already in front of the computer, while Willow had her laptop on her lap, and a bunch of wicca books around her. She was on the phone, speaking to Tara, explaining the situation. Spike grabbed his coat, helped Buffy with hers, and the two of them headed out, Lorne and Gunn following them.
The rest opened books, searching for a clue, or anything that would help, that could save her.
It was a long night, a depressing one, where very little seemed to give any hope. Xander helped with books, ran errands, and brought food regularly. He made at least four trips to the all-night café at the corner to buy tacos for Fred.
A couple hours after the research began, Angel and Cordy walked back into the hotel, the sleeping baby in Cordy's arms, while Angel had his arm wrapped protectively around her waist.
Wesley and Giles, with Angel standing silently in the background immediately interrogated Cordelia, getting every detail out of her, of the doctors prognosis, of the research, of the people she had asked for help, about everything. She answered all their questions, and then hugged Wesley he finally realized that she had tried everything, and nothing had been found.
When she covered a yawn with her hand, Angel insisted she go up to bed and sleep. For once, she didn't argue. He escorted her upstairs. When he came back down, he grabbed his sword, and headed for the door.
"Where are you going?" Wesley's voice stopped him.
"To make it stop," Angel replied without turning around.
"You're going to the PTB," Wesley stated.
"Yes, I got the location from Lorne," he said.
"You know she won't be happy when she finds out," Wesley told him.
"She'll be alive. That's all that matters," Angel returned. He looked at Wesley in the eyes, "Are you going to stop me?"
Wesley considered it for a second, "No," he answered slowly, and deliberately, "She can be furious as she wants, so long as she's alive."
"She's all that matters," Angel agreed, nodding solemnly.
"Okay, then," Wesley turned and walked back into his office, and
Angel walked out the door.
Xander watched the entire exchange, before he turned too, walked up to his girlfriend, and wrapped her in his arms, "Did I tell you today, Anya that I love you?" he whispered softly in her ear.
"Not in the last hour, no," she moved her head and met his lips halfway, kissing him softly, "I love you too, Xander. She's going to be fine, we'll find it," she reassured him.
"I know," he leaned against her.
The room quieted again, where the only sounds were the rustling of pages, and the occasional beep from the computers.
Spike and Buffy were the first to return. The two of them had visited every magic store that they knew existed, waking many of the owners up in their quest, and after a night of hearing wiccans and healers all over the city show no hope, they both looked slightly demolished.
Lorne returned with Gunn soon after. They, too didn't look happy having had to return empty handed as well.
Angel stumbled in a few hours later. He was bruised and pretty beat up, and didn't look good. With the intuition she was known for, when it came to the ensouled vampire, it was at this point that Cordelia decided to come down the steps, just in time to watch her vampire collapse on the lobby stairs.
"What happened?" she cried in panic, rushing to his side. Everyone sprang into action, Fred grabbing the first aid kit and Gunn getting blood from the fridge. Spike and Wesley lifted the limp vampire up and placed him on the couch where Cordelia started cleaning him up, all the while lecturing over getting hurt, while Angel just lay there and let her do her thing. The Scoobies watched, having never seen this side of her, of him before.
"I'm sorry," Angel said to her, catching and holding her eye.
"What did you do, Angel?" she asked him, knowing the answer already.
"I had to, Cor. I can't lose you. I just can't," his voice was desperate. He didn't even seem to notice his injuries, or the pain.
"I told you not to," she said, her expression stern, belied by the gentle touch of her hands touching and healing his injuries.
"I know," he told her, "I had to try."
"And now you know," she said. It was the finality in her voice that had a tear seeping out his eye. She reached up with her fingers and tenderly cleared it a way.
"Okay, then. You need sleep. Come on, lets get you to bed," she said firmly, her voice normal again.
"I don't want to," he replied petulantly, sounding very much like a little boy who was told it was his bedtime.
"You want to do stupid things, now you have to pay for them," she said unrepentantly, "Spike, help him up, and make sure he stays there," she ordered the other vampire.
Spike immediately followed her orders. It was the tone, the one that booked no argument that had him moving. Angel, allowed himself, newly bandaged to be helped up the stairs, pouting the entire way.
"Come with me," Angel requested, as he leaned on Spike at the head of the stairs.
She turned to face him and smiled softly, "In a minute, okay."
The pout turned into a grin, as the two vampires disappeared from sight.
Cordelia turned to face Wesley, "You let him go?" It was phrased as a question, but it wasn't one.
Wesley stood his ground this time, "Yes."
Cordelia opened her mouth to yell at him, but looked into his sorrow-filled eyes, and changed her mind, "Now you know," was all she said. She left to wash her hands.
"Okay, what happened here, did I miss something big, English?" Gunn looked at Wesley for confirmation. The Scoobies looked equally confused.
"Angel went to see someone called the PTB," Xander answered when it appeared that Wesley was lost in thought.
"Oh," Fred and Gunn said in unison, as if that explained everything. They both went back to their books.
"What do you mean oh," Willow asked, curiously.
"PTB's are the Powers that Be," Fred told them.
"Oh," Buffy said. She paused for a beat, "So…"
"So…they aren't the easiest beings to see. Angel isn't the most patient of champions, and Cordy dying isn't the best of situations," Wesley said, "He went to them to make them take the visions away."
"Oh," Xander said this time.
"I take it the answer was no," Buffy asked.
"What do you think?" Gunn said sarcastically, referring to the rather beat-up situation Angel returned in.
"How did Cordelia know where Angel went?" Anya asked.
"She knows Angel, better than anyone else," Wesley replied, "Especially after last year."
"What happened last year?" Willow asked.
"Remember when Angel slept with Darla, well after he came back, Cordelia told him, they weren't friends anymore," Wesley started.
"Angel panicked, it was actually quite funny, looking back," Gunn took over from Wesley.
Wesley started again, "He wanted our forgiveness, but hers…he needed hers. When she forgave him, Angel finally figured out he had been taking her for granted before. They started talking. He would tell her things I don't think he ever told anyone before," Wesley said to the curious onlookers.
"Its also why he can't conceive losing her," Gunn finished sadly, "And when he started falling for her."
A shaky voice interrupted the conversation, "Why does Cordy have CATscans?" The group turned to see a slight girl, holding the black sheets in her hands.
Buffy opened her mouth to reply, but nothing came out.
Dawn asked the question again, more insistently. The Scoobies exchanged looks. They didn't know how to answer.
"Why does Cordy have CATscans?" Dawn yelled this time. At the corner of the stairs Spike could be seen, rushing down at the sound of it. "She's going to die, isn't she? Like Mum," Dawn stated, looking at Buffy. Her face answered the question for the young girl.
"Mum had CATscans too. And she died." She dropped the X-rays. They fell silently, almost in slow motion to the ground. Everyone watched the movement, no one knowing quite what to do. Dawn turned suddenly and took off.
Right into Cordy, who was coming from the bathroom
"Woah there, Dawnie. Slow down or you are going to hit something," Cordy grabbed the distraught girl, pulling her into her arms. Dawn didn't come easy. She began to hit the older girl with her tiny fists, causing Cordelia to catch hold of her hands.
Buffy, Spike, Willow, Anya, Giles and Xander all moved towards the two. Cordy held up her hand to stop them.
"Dawnie?" Cordy questioned gently.
"You can't die. Connor needs his mother. He has to have a mother. Children should have mothers," the girl cried out, before bursting into tears. Loud. Sobbing tears.
"I know, sweetie. And I know that you know that sometimes people die. Sometimes people have to leave," Cordy spoke to Dawn in soft even tones.
"Why? Why do people have to die? I don't want anyone else to leave, Cordy. Mum died. And Buffy. And now you," Dawn stopped struggling.
"I wish I could tell you, Dawnie. Sometime we can't explain why things happen. But I do know one thing," Cordy said.
"What?" Dawnie choked out.
"I believe in miracles," Cordy told her softly.
"How? How can you believe in miracles? You are going to die," the teen shouted the last bit at Cordelia.
"That part is easy," Cordelia replied, "I see them everyday."
"Everyday?" Dawn questioned, curious despite the anger she felt over things she couldn't control.
"Yes, everyday," Cordelia smiled gently at Dawn, "Connor is a miracle, Dawn. He was never supposed to have been born. The human son of two vampires. That's a miracle, Buffy coming back to you. That's a miracle, honey. Spike loving you, that's a miracle. And you know what else?"
"What?" the question was already less sullen, as the girl took in what Cordy said.
"You. You're a miracle. You didn't exist before, and now you're a baby sister, a friend, important. Loved. You, Dawn are special. A miracle, and we all know it."
"I am?"
"You are." The answer was sure. Confident.
"I wish you didn't have to die, Cordy," Dawnie told her, a tear escaping.
"Me, too, sweetie," Cordelia wrapped her arms around the younger girl.
"Can we bring you back? Like Buffy." She whispered against Cordelia's breast.
"No, honey. Buffy was special. But it isn't right to change the natural order of things. You of all people know that," Cordy said firmly, leaving no doubts in anyone's mind. Dawn glanced at Spike for a second, before nodding in agreement.
"Okay, Cordy."
"I want you do something for me, Dawnie. Something only you can do," Cordelia said to the girl, leaning back slightly to look at her.
"What?" Dawn sniffed.
"I need you to take my baby shopping."
"Shopping?" the girl giggled. It wasn't what she was expecting.
"You are my last hope, Dawn," Cordelia said seriously, "Angel will only have Connor wearing black, Spike will have my baby in leather. And we both know your sister has little fashion sense," Cordy sent a look to Buffy. It wasn't apologetic, or mean. Whatever it was, Buffy got it, and smiled back. Dawn laughed and nodded in agreement.
"And we both also know, Willow and Fred can't do, with the floral and the…," Cordelia waved her hands to explain, "Wesley and Xander are dorks, and Giles doesn't know how to shop for anything but tweed, that leaves you, Dawn. You can take Anya – she's got okay taste for an ex-demon, and Gunn, but don't let him buy those pants that look like they are going fall off any second," Cordelia continued, her face totally earnest. This was a serious matter.
"You can trust me, Cordy. I'll make sure Connor only wears the coolest clothes," Dawnie told her, just as grave. She already looked better. And she had stopped crying.
"Perfect. I was worrying about that," Cordelia smiled at the girl again, "I had better go. Got a crabby vampire upstairs who carries on worse than a baby when he's hurt," she told Dawn. Giving the teen one last hug, Cordy walked to the steps.
"Cor, you really think I'm really a miracle?" the soft voice stopped her.
Cordelia turned and gave the teen one of those smiles, the 100watt ones that had men walking into walls, "No, Dawnie. I don't think. I know. Ask anyone," she said.
"She's right, squirt. Barbie ain't never wrong," Gunn stated.
Dawn smiled. Her very own 100 watt smile.
"I am not a dork," Wesley protested a little belatedly.
"I don't only wear tweed," Giles defended.
Gunn sent them both disbelieving looks.
"I wanted a miracle speech. Why didn't I get one. I needed one," Xander asked the room, speaking to no-one in particular. He didn't question his dork-status, having heard it from Cordy before.
"Cordelia said I could take Connor shopping," Anya announced proudly to the room.
"Cos we're cool, and they're not. Right, squirt?" Gunn said.
"Right," Dawn giggled. She liked Gunn.
"I wanted a miracle-speech too. I think we should have got one," Willow said, agreeing with Xander.
"You can't have the miracle-speech. You're not a miracle," Dawn said to them, sounding sure.
"Why when I tell her she's special, I get a 'Yeah, right!' and sarcasm, but when Cordy tells her, she's all 'I'm a miracle now," Buffy asked.
"Cure. You're looking for a cure, right?" Dawn suddenly questioned, ignoring Buffy's question.
"Yes," Wesley told her.
"Well, go then," Dawn ordered, sounding remarkably like Cordelia for a second, "The quicker we find Cordy's miracle, the better," she said, and everyone scattered to their various places again, hope somehow restored.
TBC
a/n hey ppl
this is sort of an in between part, to deal with some of the stuff that didnt get taken care of in the previous parts. I hope u like the Dawn part...i feel quite sorry for her, having to deal with so much, but i don't quite know how to write her. I left her out, made her sleep (writer's perogative) earlier because i felt i couldn't do her justice then...hope this works
Domino
