This is our first fiction and we know it sucks but bear with it. Critics and comments are acceptable. Rated PG-13 for language.

Disclaimer: We do not own Angel.

Fashion Tips

Angel, Connor and Wesley are talking about the latest fashion in a totally different kind of way.

Place: School

Time: Afternoon *Let's just say that Angel can stand the sun in his vampire form*

Wesley: Why..the water's cooling in a day like this?

Angel: It's cool.

Connor: Cold and freezing. *bobbed his head up and down.*

Wesley: Who are you and what are you doing here? You're not the Hyperion Schools players!

Angel: I'm Angel. Oh, really? Ok, bye.

Connor: I'm Angel's son. I'm following my dad.

Angel: *Puffed his chest proudly* My son…

Wesley: So old guy, what are you doing here? Didn't pass your 7th year exams?

Angel: Haven't even passed my first!

Connor: Same with my dad. *A hug from dad*

Angel: You smell, son.

Connor: You stink, dad. *Buried his nose deeper into his dad's armpits*

Angel: *Clamps his armpit on Connor's nose* But it's Channel latest perfume. Smell again.

Connor: *Sniffed harder* Does the perfume smells like sweat? It sure does to me.

Angel: It does? Jeez, you smell like garbage, though. Not surprising, you were born in the back alley with garbage bins.

Connor: *Starts wailing and shrieking at the top of his lungs* No, I do not! I wore Laurel perfume. Look at my lips, I put on Maybeline lipstick. *Pursed his lips* Kiss me dad.

Angel: *Puts a hand below Connor's chin* Did you put powder too? You have a pimple over there.

Wesley: *Looking aghast at the son and father* What have the world become? Dear Lord, save me! *Wesley fainted but the father and son took no notice and continue their fashion tips*

Connor: *Shakes his butt* Really? Oh, I must use Clean and Clear! It's the latest product in Women's Magazine.

Angle: *Looks down* Nice butt. *Pinches it and looks down* You have a pimple on your butt too and some shit too.

Connor: *Pouted* Never mind, it's alright because I have Johnson baby wipes! It's clean and fast. Look! *Shows his butt and the shit is gone* Look how smooth my skin is. Want to try use Dove?

Angel: Eh, I have Jusco discount card. 50% off for baby wipes! By the way your armpits are hairy.

Connor: Really? I have Parkson discount card. Never mind about the hair, I have Veets! It shaves them off looking nice and neat. *Winks at his dad*

Angel: Really? Can I have some? I'm hairy…..above and under.

Connor: Above? You mean you need to shave your hair? Don't!!! Use Brylcream to stick it up more. *Produces the Brylcream for Angel*

Angel: Really? I always use Wella. *Produces some* Try? And I got Clarins face cream. Red uses black heads.

Angel: *Sticks his tongue out* Look at my teeth instead. See how white they are? Wanna try Darlie? It cleanses your 2000 years old teeth for you and it'll be more whiter.

Angel:  I can only see your tongue. Move it. I prefer Colgate myself. Do you use Listerine? It has two colors. Blue and orange. Personally, I think they both taste bad. I always drink 2 bottles everyday.

Connor: *Blinks his eyes in disbelief* I thought you were only interested in human blood. Amazing, dad!

Angel: Thanks, son!

At the same time Wesley woke up from his slumber sleep and looked blinkingly at the father and son. He rolled his eyes and fainted again.

Connor: He's weird.

Angel: *Shrugs* Let's go.

And so the two weird couple went off leaving a very much in shock Wesley behind.

Well, that's all but if you would like use to continue more fashion tips in a very much peculiar way, email us at nuriko_memories@yahoo.com