Prologue
Julie: So, who shall we start with today? *unlocks cage full of Yugi Oh characters*
Characters: Nooooo! *Joe gets pushed out of the cage*
Joe: Hey guys, what did you do that for?
Julie: All right, how shall we torture him then?
Characters: *chanting* Fall in Love!
Joe: No, not that!
Julie: If you hadn't said that, I wouldn't have done it, but since you're miserable.
Joe: What a good idea!
Julie: Too late. *To characters* Who will he fall in love with?
Characters: *push Anzu out*
Julie: *snickers*
Anzu: *puts on puppy dog eyes*
Julie: Don't even start with that?
Anzu: Oh great!
Julie: Well I'm glad you're so enthusiastic.
Anzu: I didn't mean it like THAT!
Julie: Oh no? *gives threatening glance*
Anzu: I did, and I'll even write the disclaimer.
Joe: Suckup!
Anzu: Why you.I'll kill you with my bare hands! Julie: Now guys, cooperate! It's my job to kill people, not yours! So Anzu, you were saying about writing the disclaimer. Anzu: Sure, right away! (
Julie does not own Yugi Oh, however if she did, she would be the most perfect and fair owner in the world.
Joe: Three cheers for Julie!
Everyone: *stares at him oddly*
Chapter 1
Joe notices a shiny object on the table. He goes to see what it is, and finds a letter wrapped in aluminum foil. He picks it up and reads it:
*Dear Joe, I have run away with my love, Yami (the pharaoh). By the way, did you notice the pharaoh was gone? (Probably not!) Please take care of my grandfather (he lives with us, he's the old man by the cat.) Yugi P.S. I wrapped the letter in tin foil so that you would notice it. *
Joe: We have a cat?
Grandpa: *thinks* Oh my god, I'm stuck with an idiot.
Cat: *agreeing* Meow!
Cat: *picks up its toy mouse and swings it in front of Joe*
Joe: *tries to grab the mouse, but fails*
Cat: *thinking* Oh great, now I've got a pet!
Finally realizing that a cat was toying him with, Joe looked at the old man, sitting just where Yugi had described.
Joe: It's odd, I've never noticed him there before.
Grandpa: Bring me my herbs Joe, I'm not feeling so good.
Joe goes out in the garden, and looks at all the pots marked "Grandpa's herbs." He walks right past them, to the great big patch of grass and rips a handful of it. Then, with a proud look on his face, he brings the grass to Grandpa.
Joe: I've got your herbs, Gramps.
Grandpa: Now go take your medicine, boy!
Joe: What do you mean, Gramps?
Grandpa: Never mind. Now go take a walk in the desert, and look at the pretty cactuses.
Joe goes outside, and onto the path leading to the desert. He then sees a magnificently purple butterfly, so invitingly fluttering above the road leading into town. Joe skips after the butterfly, but then notices a glittery stand. He walks over to the owner.
Joe: I couldn't help but notice the glittery stand.
Owner: *thinks* I put that in for idiots like you.
Owner: Would you like to buy one of my beautiful slave girls? *claps* Come out Mai.
Mai comes out onto the stage, her glittery robes glistening in the sunlight.
Joe: Oooh, shiny!
Mai: There's no way in hell I'm being sold to this moron! *storms off stage, and pushes Anzu out*
Owner: I'm not selling her!
Joe: *does not hear the owner, because he's slow* That is the most beautiful.*looks up at the sky and sees a bird* that is the biggest bird I've ever seen.wait a minute.* looks back at the stage* most beautiful girl I've ever seen.
Owner: Sold, to the glistening idiot up front.
Joe: *gives up all his money to the owner, which wasn't that much because grandpa took most of it before Joe left. *
Anzu looks at her new owner. Oddly enough, she likes him, and follows him home (even after Joe realized that he went in the wrong direction for almost ten miles, and then turns back.)
Anzu: So, what did you buy me for, if I may ask?
Joe: Oh, I just thought you were pretty, I guess.
Anzu was amazed at the frankness and innocence of her new owner.
Anzu: So master, what chores or duties will I be required to perform?
Joe: I dunno, I never thought of that. *thinks* Wow, I've got a slave, and I've never thought this much before either.
When Joe and Anzu got home, Joe made a formal introduction of the slave he had just bought.
Joe: Hey Gramps.
Grandpa: Who's the girl?
Joe: Oh, I bought a slave, did I forget to tell you?
Grandpa: Yeah, I think you did. *thinks* Thank God I took all of his money, or else he would've bought an elephant.
Anzu: So, what can I do for you, masters?
Joe: Aw shucks, you ain't got to do nothin. Here, have a seat, I'll make you a cup of tea.
Grandpa: Uh, I think I'd better do that.
Joe: So, what's your name, slave girl?
Anzu: My name is Anzu.
Joe: Well, Anzu, would you like a foot massage?
Anzu: Well, if you don't mind?
Joe: Not at all, *gives Anzu a foot massage*
Grandpa: *comes in with two cups of tea* What are you doing Joe?
Joe: Givin' the girl a foot massage. Where's the third cup of tea Gramps?
Grandpa: The slave girl can make her own! Joe: Oh no, we shouldn't trouble her. By the way, where will she sleep? I know, you can take Gramps' bed, Anzu dear.
Grandpa: What? I cannot permit a SLAVE to sleep in my warm bed? Where will I sleep?
Joe: Well you can sleep on the chair, with the cat.
Cat: *thinks* Great, now they're trying to take over my one and only possession, my chair!
Grandpa: Now I've had enough! It's bad enough that my grandson leaves me with a guy with a brain the size of a pea, even smaller, but now he's trying to give my bed to the slave! I'm moving to Las Vegas, where they have the Ugga Ugga dancers. *jumps out of the window*
Julie: So, who shall we start with today? *unlocks cage full of Yugi Oh characters*
Characters: Nooooo! *Joe gets pushed out of the cage*
Joe: Hey guys, what did you do that for?
Julie: All right, how shall we torture him then?
Characters: *chanting* Fall in Love!
Joe: No, not that!
Julie: If you hadn't said that, I wouldn't have done it, but since you're miserable.
Joe: What a good idea!
Julie: Too late. *To characters* Who will he fall in love with?
Characters: *push Anzu out*
Julie: *snickers*
Anzu: *puts on puppy dog eyes*
Julie: Don't even start with that?
Anzu: Oh great!
Julie: Well I'm glad you're so enthusiastic.
Anzu: I didn't mean it like THAT!
Julie: Oh no? *gives threatening glance*
Anzu: I did, and I'll even write the disclaimer.
Joe: Suckup!
Anzu: Why you.I'll kill you with my bare hands! Julie: Now guys, cooperate! It's my job to kill people, not yours! So Anzu, you were saying about writing the disclaimer. Anzu: Sure, right away! (
Julie does not own Yugi Oh, however if she did, she would be the most perfect and fair owner in the world.
Joe: Three cheers for Julie!
Everyone: *stares at him oddly*
Chapter 1
Joe notices a shiny object on the table. He goes to see what it is, and finds a letter wrapped in aluminum foil. He picks it up and reads it:
*Dear Joe, I have run away with my love, Yami (the pharaoh). By the way, did you notice the pharaoh was gone? (Probably not!) Please take care of my grandfather (he lives with us, he's the old man by the cat.) Yugi P.S. I wrapped the letter in tin foil so that you would notice it. *
Joe: We have a cat?
Grandpa: *thinks* Oh my god, I'm stuck with an idiot.
Cat: *agreeing* Meow!
Cat: *picks up its toy mouse and swings it in front of Joe*
Joe: *tries to grab the mouse, but fails*
Cat: *thinking* Oh great, now I've got a pet!
Finally realizing that a cat was toying him with, Joe looked at the old man, sitting just where Yugi had described.
Joe: It's odd, I've never noticed him there before.
Grandpa: Bring me my herbs Joe, I'm not feeling so good.
Joe goes out in the garden, and looks at all the pots marked "Grandpa's herbs." He walks right past them, to the great big patch of grass and rips a handful of it. Then, with a proud look on his face, he brings the grass to Grandpa.
Joe: I've got your herbs, Gramps.
Grandpa: Now go take your medicine, boy!
Joe: What do you mean, Gramps?
Grandpa: Never mind. Now go take a walk in the desert, and look at the pretty cactuses.
Joe goes outside, and onto the path leading to the desert. He then sees a magnificently purple butterfly, so invitingly fluttering above the road leading into town. Joe skips after the butterfly, but then notices a glittery stand. He walks over to the owner.
Joe: I couldn't help but notice the glittery stand.
Owner: *thinks* I put that in for idiots like you.
Owner: Would you like to buy one of my beautiful slave girls? *claps* Come out Mai.
Mai comes out onto the stage, her glittery robes glistening in the sunlight.
Joe: Oooh, shiny!
Mai: There's no way in hell I'm being sold to this moron! *storms off stage, and pushes Anzu out*
Owner: I'm not selling her!
Joe: *does not hear the owner, because he's slow* That is the most beautiful.*looks up at the sky and sees a bird* that is the biggest bird I've ever seen.wait a minute.* looks back at the stage* most beautiful girl I've ever seen.
Owner: Sold, to the glistening idiot up front.
Joe: *gives up all his money to the owner, which wasn't that much because grandpa took most of it before Joe left. *
Anzu looks at her new owner. Oddly enough, she likes him, and follows him home (even after Joe realized that he went in the wrong direction for almost ten miles, and then turns back.)
Anzu: So, what did you buy me for, if I may ask?
Joe: Oh, I just thought you were pretty, I guess.
Anzu was amazed at the frankness and innocence of her new owner.
Anzu: So master, what chores or duties will I be required to perform?
Joe: I dunno, I never thought of that. *thinks* Wow, I've got a slave, and I've never thought this much before either.
When Joe and Anzu got home, Joe made a formal introduction of the slave he had just bought.
Joe: Hey Gramps.
Grandpa: Who's the girl?
Joe: Oh, I bought a slave, did I forget to tell you?
Grandpa: Yeah, I think you did. *thinks* Thank God I took all of his money, or else he would've bought an elephant.
Anzu: So, what can I do for you, masters?
Joe: Aw shucks, you ain't got to do nothin. Here, have a seat, I'll make you a cup of tea.
Grandpa: Uh, I think I'd better do that.
Joe: So, what's your name, slave girl?
Anzu: My name is Anzu.
Joe: Well, Anzu, would you like a foot massage?
Anzu: Well, if you don't mind?
Joe: Not at all, *gives Anzu a foot massage*
Grandpa: *comes in with two cups of tea* What are you doing Joe?
Joe: Givin' the girl a foot massage. Where's the third cup of tea Gramps?
Grandpa: The slave girl can make her own! Joe: Oh no, we shouldn't trouble her. By the way, where will she sleep? I know, you can take Gramps' bed, Anzu dear.
Grandpa: What? I cannot permit a SLAVE to sleep in my warm bed? Where will I sleep?
Joe: Well you can sleep on the chair, with the cat.
Cat: *thinks* Great, now they're trying to take over my one and only possession, my chair!
Grandpa: Now I've had enough! It's bad enough that my grandson leaves me with a guy with a brain the size of a pea, even smaller, but now he's trying to give my bed to the slave! I'm moving to Las Vegas, where they have the Ugga Ugga dancers. *jumps out of the window*
