A/N: Will Sakura be able to figure things out? In case you are wondering about the stupid dreams Sakura had, it's just something to force her to listen to her heart and not her head. She has always thought of Yukito and Yue as two separate people, hence her idea of dividing them into two bodies. But it's wrong, she's wrong. It's her own confusion that's causing her a headache. Though she's gradually coming to accept that Yue and Yukito are essentially the same, with one heart. Two different personalities, yes, but one heart. The heart that loves Sakura!
For your info, I'm basing the sequence of scenes and cards that Sakura changes on the TV series, not on the Manga.
CHAPTER NINE: Revelations
ERIOL?
A strong purple magical aura clouded her senses suddenly, wiping all thoughts of Yue and Yukito from her mind.
Eriol-kun! I sense his presence very near! And Ruby Moon's and Spinel Sun's! Oh, now I remember, he'll be in my class when the new term starts. I bet he's just curious to see me. After all, this is the first time he's meeting me. Hee hee, but he doesn't know that I come from the future and knows all about him already! This is going to be interesting.
Sakura giggled to herself, but her face paled when she remembered something frightening.
"Hoeeeeeeeeee!!! Today is the last day of holiday! And I have not even BEGIN doing my homework! Oh no!!!" She rushed home, as three figures stood in the shadows, looking at her retreating back. The shortest of the three smiled as his sapphire-blue eyes twinkled.
Sakura begged, persuaded and finally bribed Kero-chan with sweets before he agreed to help her with the pile of untouched homework. They worked through the night, and finally, just before midnight, managed to complete all the holiday assignments. They sank into an exhausted heap on the bed and slept. The next morning, Sakura woke up earlier than usual, because it's her turn to take care of the classroom and some chores.
She happily bladed to school, and met Yukito on her way. To her delight, instead of seeming sleepy, as would have been if she didn't increase her powers, Yukito seems energetic. And he was carrying a normal-sized lunchbox instead of his usual large paper bag of food. Sakura was glad that Yukito and Yue don't have to suffer the feeling of fading day by day. She vowed with renewed determination to be stronger, no matter what.
"Ohayo, Yukito-san!"
"Ohayo, Sakura-chan!"
"Yukito-san, how are you feeling today?" Sakura asked, wanting to be sure that he's really all right and not pretending so that she won't worry.
"Great! At the start of the holidays I felt a little tired sometimes, but as the days go by, I feel better and more energetic! Almost as if someone is feeding me without I knowing it!" Yukito-san said jokingly, not knowing how true his words are. Yue, however knew better. At the back of Yukito's mind, he smiled wryly.
You don't know how hard Sakura has to train to make you, no, US feel better and more energetic. And at what expense? I see her smile, but the shadows of fatigue are clouding her usual clear emerald-green eyes. My heart aches, but I know this can't be helped. Why do I have to be so helpless! I wish there's some way I can make her feel better…………..
"That's great Yukito-san!" Sakura smile grew wider and more brilliant.
"But you seems tired, Sakura-chan." Yukito-san stared into her eyes with much concern.
"Oh! It's nothing! I just forgot to do my homework till yesterday, and I had to rush through them till late in the night. Dai-jou-bu!"
Yukito nodded, but appeared somewhat unconvinced. Sakura looked at her watch and said, "I got to go! Today's my turn to do classroom duty! Ja-ne~" She turned to leave.
"Sakura-chan!" Yukito called out to her as he tossed her a sweet. She caught it and waved good-bye. There was a shadow of aura in the sweet. Surprised, she focused, and could feel Yue's silver aura washing over her in concern. "Dai-jou-bu, Yue, thank you too." Sakura smiled in joy. She was starting to think that no matter what form Yue and Yukito is in, they both have the same kind heart, the one that she loves. I think my dream was reflecting my confusion, trying to tell me to accept that both of you are the one and the same, and to love one, is to love another. I don't have to choose, I just have to follow my heart. And my heart is with you, always.
And in the back of Yukito's mind, Yue was thinking, this is all I can do for you, my Sakura. Yukito couldn't hear Yue's thoughts, but he too, was starting to feel something special for Sakura, something that wasn't there before. He had always thought of her as a younger sister, the sister of his best friend Touya. But ever since that rainy day where he found himself in wet clothes and not knowing where the past few hours had gone to, something changed. It was as if something important happened, but he didn't know what. Though his mind drew up a blank on what he did in the last few hours, all he could think of was Sakura's sweet face. Her angelic smile, and captivating bright-green eyes. She's making him feel more alive than ever by just being there.
=======In school=======
Sakura reached her classroom and hummed happily, before remembering that Syaoran is here too. She called out a cheerful greeting and they did the chores together. Syaoran told her that he's leaving soon, because he has to go back to Hong Kong to report what happened to the Clow cards to his mother. Sakura nodded, fully aware that he would change his mind later in the day, though she still doesn't know the reason. But Syaoran seemed sad, so Sakura cheered him up by saying, "It's not like we'll never see each other again right! We will definitely meet again huh?" Syaoran seemed to cheer up a little.
Syaoran was not the only unhappy one, as Tomoyo entered the classroom with a sigh. "Tomoyo! Ohayo! What's wrong?"
Tomoyo went told Sakura in a seriously sad tone that she can't see Sakura in the costumes she made anymore, since all the Clow cards are collected. Sakura sweatdropped.
The teacher soon arrived and everyone settled back into their seats. He introduced a new student to the class. Sakura looked up to see Eriol, and she was so happy to see him that she barely manages to hid a smile. She has to pretend that she's never met him before; otherwise there would be lots of explaining to do. Eriol was assigned to sit beside Syaoran, who was sitting behind Sakura. On his way to his assigned seat, Eriol stopped to greet Sakura. She wasn't caught unaware this time, so she politely returned his greeting, trying to stop her mouth from smiling.
During lunch break, Sakura sat alone, replying Mizuki-sensei's letter. When she thinks of Mizuki-sensei, she remembers her shock of discovering that Eriol sent her with the moon bell to help her during Yue's judgment. Unknowingly, she spoke Eriol's name aloud.
"Are you calling me?" Eriol smiled gently at Sakura, who jumped a little in fright. She quickly recovered and replied. "No, I was just thinking about something aloud."
Eriol's put on a worried look, and he asked. "Am I disturbing you? It seems that you are writing a letter."
Sakura kept the letter back in her pocket and invited Eriol to sit down. Out of habit, she said, "No, of course not Eriol-kun, please sit down." Then she realized that she had called him by his first name, and apologized.
"It's all right, please do call me Eriol, as long as I can call you Sakura-chan."
"Hai!" Sakura was glad to see Eriol, no matter that he's going to plan some weird events to force her hand in changing the Clow cards. She was prepared this time.
Eriol engaged in some small talk, but his mind was distracted. She seems to know me already. How? And her aura is so much stronger than I expected. I was surprised she didn't need the moon bell for her second chance during Yue's judgment, but she far exceeds my expectations. Well, anyway, this would make things more interesting.
School ended soon, and Syaoran, Tomoyo and Sakura walked back home together. Syaoran suddenly announced that he won't be going back to Hong Kong yet, and Sakura was delighted. I'm glad this part of the past remained the same, though I still don't know why Syaoran changed his mind. Anyway, I'm really happy to have him here! Sakura thought, as she smiled happily at a blushing Syaoran. They spotted an ice-cream stand, and Sakura went to buy some for the three of them. She had just handed the ice-creams to Tomoyo and Syaoran when hers was grabbed out of her hand. Without turning around, she could sense Touya's aura. "ONNI-CHAN!!" Man, some things really never change, like the Onni-chan who always likes to bully her.
Her heart sped up when she saw Yukito-san. Seeing Yukito-san is almost equal to seeing Yue, and she's so happy that she grinned like she won lottery. "Yukito-san!"
He chided Touya for snatching away Sakura's ice-cream, but Touya seemed distracted, as if looking for someone. Yukito went to buy another ice-cream for Sakura, while she just looked on dreamily. She tensed when she felt another aura, but relaxed in the next second when she realized it was Ruby Moon's. Ah, I haven't seen Ruby Moon for a long time now; I always missed her energetic and cheerful smiles. Sakura thought, as Ruby Moon appeared behind Touya and introduced herself. She hugged Sakura tightly and she returned her hug in kind. Ruby Moon seemed rather surprised, but still kept a smile on her face. As usual, her attention span is short, and her eyes darted to Yukito as she shot him a sly smile secretly.
Nobody noticed the look, except for Sakura. She was no longer as clueless as she was, and as her powers grew, she was also more perceptive. Especially when Ruby Moon's aura flared and grew a little hostile towards Yukito. And Yue. Sakura was shocked; she had never imagined Ruby Moon to feel this way towards Yukito or Yue. All the while, she had thought that Ruby Moon was just doing her duty as Eriol's guardian in carrying his plans. But why would Ruby Moon feel hostile towards Yukito or Yue? Sakura decided to keep her eyes open when Ruby Moon's around, just in case. She honestly doesn't want any harm to come to Yue and Yukito, though she suspects that Ruby Moon probably wouldn't hurt them. Still, the nagging feeling that Ruby Moon's hiding something………..Sakura was surprised at herself for being suspicious at her friend. Why, I shouldn't think of Ruby Moon this way! I'm sure I'm just mistaken. But then, why can't I shake off the feeling that there's something going on behind my back?
Sakura didn't realize that she's maturing at a faster pace ever since she returned to the past. All that has happened, clearing her own confusion about whom she really loves and training to improve her magic has forced her to grow up. She still has a pure and kind heart, but her innocence is chipping away bit by bit.
Yue was thinking along the same lines as Sakura, though he has no doubts that Ruby Moon is indeed hiding something. He too, decided to keep a look-out and observe her. However, Yukito was oblivious to everything.
On her way home, something else was nagging at the back of Sakura's mind. Yukito-san.
Yukito-san still doesn't know about Yue, or does he? I know he would feel sad when he discovers the truth, but he has to know sooner or later. And I hope that when he knows the truth, he can love me like I love him and Yue too. I've got to talk to Yue about this soon. Yue's not too good at expressing himself, and I don't want him to be too brash in his words when he reveals himself to Yukito-san. It's really strange how the same heart can have such extremely different personalities. But I love both their personalities. And I believe the saying that 'Love conquers all'. I will help Yukito-san to get through this rough patch, just like I would protect Yue from all danger and harm.
When she reached home, she was going to tidy up her room when out of the blue, she felt like taking a look at the Clow book. Once she touched the magic book, she was thrown into another dimension as Clow spoke to her. "Sorry Sakura, I believe I'll be bringing you some trouble from now on." Then she was brought back into reality. She looked at the clow book and found the words 'Sakura' on them. This all seems so familiar, of course, for she had experienced this before. Kero-chan flew beside her to examine the book. Suddenly, they both detected an aura, and they followed it.
It was rainy cats and dogs, but only in the town of Tomoeda. Tomoyo was informed, and as to be expected, she brought a new costume for Sakura to wear. Tomoyo was so happy to film Sakura in her hand-made costume that she grew all dot-eyed. Sakura took out her star-key, and changed it into a staff using a new chant. Kero-chan and Tomoyo looked at her in surprise. She cracked a nervous smile and explained, "I just thought that a new key should have a new chant, that's all. Luckily it worked!" Kero-chan remembered that Sakura already knew the past and kept quiet, while Tomoyo had stars in her eyes again. "Oh Sakura-chan is so smart! Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!"
Sakura thought she felt Eriol's aura, but it disappeared as he hid it. Eriol-kun is really good, I didn't fully appreciate the way he planned everything and hide his true self from us before. But now I do, ever since I came back to the past and had to do some hiding of my own. Keeping the truth from those you love, from your friends, is really a burden. I feel can virtually feel my shoulders sagging beneath the weight sometimes. Eriol-kun, is this what you felt too? I think this back-to-the-future experience has taught me many things, and helped me to understand you better. All right, now I've got to concentrate and rid this rain.
Her thoughts ended when a large jet of water aimed at her. The water nearly got her, but Yue came just in time to carry her out of harm's way. "Yue!" Sakura was happy to in his arms once again. She missed him, though she just saw him yesterday. Yue tried to hide his smile, but his happiness at seeing Sakura and touching her shone through his silver eyes. Then they grew serious as more water flew at them.
"Kero-chan! Take care of Tomoyo-chan!" Sakura shouted, concerned about the safety of her friend. Kero transformed and spread his wings to protect himself and Tomoyo.
Sakura focused on the task on hand. Still in the air with Yue, she took out the Firey. "Cards created by Clow, I order you to give up your old appearance and be reborn. You have to obey your new mistress, Sakura. Release!" And the Clow card transformed into a Sakura card. "Firey!" The spirit burned and dried up the rain as it flew towards the sky.
Sakura whipped her head as she tried to trace Eriol's aura, but gave up when she remembered that he didn't want to be revealed till all cards has been changed. Yue and Kero-chan approached Sakura, and saw that she's alright. She doesn't even seem tired. Her powers have grown much. Tomoyo aimed her video-cam at Sakura and asked curiously, "Sakura-chan, how did you know you have to change the Clow card into Sakura card?"
"Er, well, since the Clow book has my name on it now, and the staff is also a star instead of the old symbol, I figured the cards got to be changed to work as well." She replied nervously, hoping Tomoyo will believe her and leave it at that.
Tomoyo nodded, but she had a thoughtful look on her face. She cast another long look at Sakura before bidding farewell. Sakura didn't relax till Tomoyo was out of sight.
"Whew, I thought she'd be suspicious!"
Kero-chan scratched his head in puzzlement. "Why don't you tell her? I mean, you don't need to go into details, just say that you are from the future."
"Do you think she'll accept that? She's bound to want details! Knowing Tomoyo-chan, she'll probably even ask me what are the designs of the costumes I am going to wear in the coming battles!"
"That reminds me, do you know who's causing the rain? And what are the coming battles?" Kero-chan enquired.
"I can't tell you that. All I can say is that we got to deal with all these strange events till all the Clow cards are transformed into Sakura cards."
"Oh! You mean the person who caused this rain is helping us?" Kero-chan enthused. But Sakura just shook her head and kept mum. She can't tell her guardians anymore; for fear that the future will change too much. Moreover, Kero-chan would just sit back and relax if he knows Eriol is helping them, and that he's the reincarnation of their old master. With a start, Sakura wondered if Yue would blame her from keeping this from him. Yue might want to be with Eriol instead of herself. But Eriol already has Ruby Moon and Spinel Sun. But, but………..she shook her head in confusion.
Yue seems to sense her uneasiness and suggested that Kero-chan be quiet and not asks so many questions. Kero got mad at Yue and starting bickering with him. Yue just gave him the silent treatment, while keeping an eye on Sakura, who had her head bowed. She suddenly stopped Kero-chan's bickering by saying, "You guys go back first; I want to be alone." And she walked off, leaving Kero-chan's stunned and Yue even more concerned.
"What's wrong with Sakura?" Kero-chan asked Yue, having got over his anger finally. Yue shrugged, but his eyes followed Sakura. He wanted to catch up with her, but respected her privacy. "I'm going off." Yue took off into the night-sky.
"Fine! Ignore me! Just leave me alone too!" Kero-chan grumbled as he transformed in his smaller form and flew back to Sakura's house.
Sakura had forgotten about Eriol, who had heard the entire conversation that she had with the two guardians after Tomoyo left them. After Sakura had quickly dispelled the rain he created with her Firey, Ruby Moon and Spinel Sun had lost interest and returned home, leaving Eriol staring at Sakura and the others. Eriol had been suspicious for a while, and decided to hang around to see if he could gather any information. To his amazement, he heard Kero-chan say that Sakura was from the future. And Sakura's reply confirmed what he guessed earlier in school this morning; she did really know him. After the two guardians left, he followed Sakura and approached her silently. He wasn't surprised when she called out to him without turning around.
"Eriol-kun, it's you isn't it." She sighed, as she had wanted to be alone to clear her thoughts.
"Sakura-chan. I overheard something interesting in the park just now." Eriol stated, and waited for her reaction. Sakura froze. He smiled infuriatingly, "Gotcha."
Sakura hesitated for a moment before she chose not to pretend she doesn't know what's Eriol's talking about. Eriol has always been the most perceptive among her friends, and she doesn't think that a lame reply will be accepted.
"So you know everything now?" Sakura said with wearily, she faced Eriol with a resigned look on her face.
"No, not everything, just that you are from the future." Eriol took in her expression and his eyes softened. He sensed that she needed support rather than someone demanding answers. Taking her small hands into his, he smiled gently. "But if you don't want to talk about it, it's ok. Whatever makes you comfortable."
Sakura sobbed and threw herself into Eriol's arms. He patted her back and murmured soothingly. After she calmed, she draw herself out of his embrace and took a deep breath. "I'm fine now, arigatou."
"I think you would be able to find out anyway, being the Eriol-kun I know. So I guess I should just tell you." And she did. Starting from her idea of dividing Yue and Yukito into two separate entities, to the mess-up in the spell, to the disappearance of Yue. And her goals to save Yue, as well as helping Touya keep his powers. Things that she didn't even thought of telling Kero-chan spilled out of her like water. Eriol just had that comforting presence that she knows she can trust and rely on.
Eriol had listened attentively, nodded at appropriate intervals. When Sakura finished talking, he spoke.
"So, we are very good friends in the future?"
Sakura grinned in reply. "VERY good friends. But this time, don't wait for two years before coming to Japan to visit me." She punched his arm lightly.
"Hai hai, I promise." Eriol was happy, and from her tale, he sensed that his plans were in order. Well, he should say that Clow's plans were in order, for it seemed that Sakura has fallen for Yue and the feeling is mutual.
As if reading his thoughts, Sakura said, "I'm worried about Yue and Yukito. Yukito doesn't know about Yue, I think. And Yue……….I'm afraid he'd be angry when he knows I'm keeping the truth about you from him. He loves Clow-san, and hard as it's to admit, I know he still loves Clow-san, more than he loves me." She hung her head as another tear fell from her eye.
She sniffed and continued. "What if he doesn't want me to be his mistress? Would it be better for him to be with you?"
"No!" Eriol protested. "I'm not Clow, even though I have his memories. I am my own person. You understand that, don't you?"
As Sakura lifted her head, she caught a look of sadness and loneliness in Eriol's azure eyes. She hugged him tightly, as she finally understands what he's going through.
Poor Eriol, he's carrying so many burdens on his shoulders, having to carry out the plans of his former self. Yet, like he said, he is his own person. But being responsible, he has to follow these plans through, when he could have lived a carefree life. I always thought that his smiles were gentle, but now I sense the sadness and loneliness behind them. I feel sorry for him. He comforts and helps those around him, but who comforts him? Who can understand the real him, seeing behind the smiling mask and accepting the real Eriol? Not the reincarnation of the great magician Clow, but his own person, the young heart of Eriol?
"Eriol-kun, you can always confide in me if you need to talk to someone. I'll always be here to listen. Don't bottle everything inside, it will hurt more. I know, because I was hurting, and luckily I have wonderful friends who care about me, like you." Sakura's hands stroked Eriol's short dark hair kindly. Eriol let down his emotional barriers for a moment to rest his chin on her head, and seek comfort in her arms for the first time in his life. He felt his heart grew lighter as his soul lifted in joy in finding a confidante. Then he stepped back and smiled, a genuinely warm smile.
"Arigatou, Sakura-chan."
"You are welcome, Eriol-kun." She smiled, glad to dispel some of the sadness in his heart.
"But, Eriol-kun, do you think I should tell Yue the truth? I'm afraid he'll be angry with me if I don't."
"No, I don't think now's the time. Moreover, Yue can never stay angry at the person he loves for long, so don't worry too much." Sakura flushed red.
"You should focus on changing the Clow cards into Sakura cards, and also gaining your magic to sustain Yue and Yukito's existence. I will help you in the training, but you'll have to keep it a secret. What do you normally do to increase your powers?"
Sakura described her meditation methods, while Eriol made some suggestions. But soon Sakura had to go home as it was getting really late. Eriol proposed that they both pretend they don't know each other that well in school so as not to raise suspicions and unnecessary questions. Sakura agreed readily. She promised to do her best in meeting the challenges that Eriol will set for her in changing the Clow cards into Sakura cards, and they parted ways. Unknown to both of them, the future is already shifting……………..
TBC
A/N: Comments please!!! I thought that I could examine the emotions behind the characters for this chapter, something which is hard to see from the TV series. Just so you are wondering, I don't have the CCS manga. And besides Yue/Yukito and Sakura, I have always like Eriol too. Ok, REVIEW please!!! I'm thinking of adding a new character in the next chapter, but haven't decided who yet! Any suggestions?? Either state in your review or email me at kath_windy@yahoo.com! Thanks a million!!
