The Dark
Chapter Four: Breaking
Krystiana
kbrannan@neo.rr.com
Chapter Four: Breaking
Krystiana
kbrannan@neo.rr.com
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any related characters. If you're reading this, hopefully you know who does so I won't have to list them.
This chapter was originally supposed to have much more involved. However, it kept growing, and I want all the chapters to be about the same length.
I've been told I have a very unusual writing style. Well, I want to know what's unusual about it. How's about some comments? (And why don't you sign my guestbook? It looks all lonely right now.)
-Ministry of Magic- The moon was beautiful tonight. A crescent moon, waxing, glowing. It was mocking him. Remus Lupin hated the moon. He feared the moon. The moon hated him, as well. However, as he looked out the window, he found he couldn't stop staring at its beauty. "Remus?" Sirius' voice was confused. Remus hardly ever looked at the moon, and when he did, it was never with a look of amazement. "Are you all right? What are you doing?" "I'm fine," Remus said, turning to Sirius. He smiled, but his eyes were sad. "I'm just embracing my wolf heritage." "Don't joke about that, Remus. Please." "I'm sorry." Remus glanced out the window once more. "I suppose the worry is getting to me. My sense of humor is in a bunch." Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Whatever that means." "It means that I can't deal with this guilt, and the worry. We listened to Severus, but we didn't listen enough, apparently." "We didn't take him seriously. But Remus, we can't blame ourselves for Harry's capture." Remus turned and glowered in a teasing manner. "You shut up. You're blaming yourself just as much as I'm blaming myself, if not more. You just want to get me to stop." Sirius let out a weak laugh. "I'm not inclined to argue on that one. You know me too well, Remus." He turned and collapsed into a nearby chair, sighing. "I let James down." "You didn't let anyone down." "I let Harry down more than anyone. I'm supposed to be there for him, and I haven't." "That's hardly your fault!" Remus' voice raised, only a little, but it was still very unusual for him. "I only worried about his safety. I never asked him about his friends, his relationships . . . I never asked him what was really on his mind. I always assumed he was constantly thinking about You-Know-Who. I guess I forgot what it was like to be a student." He buried his head in his hands, running his fingers through his hair. "What are you going on about, Sirius?" Sirius leaned back in the chair, giving Remus a wry smile. "I missed something vital in Harry's social life. I should have known about it. And now I'm thinking it might be crucial even to the war." "I don't understand." "Moony, Harry has a boyfriend." Remus paused, blinking. "Boy?" A small laugh came from Sirius. "Ron told me." "Wait a minute . . . Ron? Ron Weasley?" "No, it's not Ron. If it was Ron, I would have no problem with it." Sirius sighed. "I should have let him know about . . . some escapades of the Marauders." "I wouldn't tell him about James. Not many kids are comfortable knowing about their parents' previous relationships." "I wasn't going to give specifics." Sirius was now avoiding Remus' eyes, and a silence came over the two men. Remus closed his eyes, then walked forward and kneeling in front of Sirius. He reached out and grasped Sirius' chin with slender fingers, turning dark eyes toward his own. "I have one thing to say, Sirius." "What's that?" Sirius' voice was a whisper. "I'm sorry." * * * -1981, September- Sirius Black captured kiss-bruised lips with his own, hearing a soft moan erupt from his lover's throat. Tongues tangled, words were nonexistent, and sight was something not needed. "Sirius . . . " That was all it took. Sirius groaned as his whispered name reached his ears, his body trembling, his vision exploding into stars. He collapsed, panting gently, giving Remus Lupin one more kiss. After a moment, Sirius started snickering. "We are two very sweaty people," he stated. "Do you mind it?" "Not particularly. I'm finding myself very comforted by our drippings of sweat." Sirius gave a small, sad smile. "After all, it might be the last time for a long time that . . . our sweat will get to mix." Remus chuckled, looking into his lover's eyes. "You manage to be humorous about everything." He stroked the side of Sirius' face. "You're going into hiding after the spell is cast. I won't be able to find you." Sirius titled his face into Remus' hand, closing his eyes halfway. "It honors me so much that James picked me to be their secret keeper. But I'll miss you. I don't know how long I'll be gone." "No one knows." Remus gave Sirius a soft kiss on the lips. "I trust you, Sirius. I know that you won't give in to anything. That's why James chose you." As silence fell between the two, Remus began studying Sirius' face, a question lingering in his eyes. "Is something wrong, Remus?" "I just have . . . a question. A few questions, actually." Sirius sat back, still straddling his lover. He crossed his arms and looked into Remus' eyes. "Shoot." Remus took a deep breath before asking Sirius his question. "Do you ever . . . regret not being with James? I know you liked him for a long time." Sirius smiled. "You're jealous." "That's not what I asked." "My crush on James was pure lust. I also think I wanted him because Lucius Malfoy somehow managed to snag him, and I refused to be outshone by that brat." Sirius rolled to his side and curled up against Remus. "You are completely different. I lust for you, just like I did for James, but I have love for you, as well." He paused, smiling at the werewolf. "I am very much in love with you. I will not give up anything to You-Know-Who or his Death Eaters. It's not only for James and Lily, but for you, too." A smile began tracing itself on Remus' lips as he kissed his lover. "I love you, Sirius Black." "I sure hope you do. I have a nasty little love bug bite, as well." Remus snorted as Sirius began snickering. "Sometimes I can't tell if you're joking if you are genuinely being corny." Sirius smirked. "Your guess. I love you." With one more kiss, the two lovers wished each other a good night and fell asleep together for the last time. * * * -Present Time, Ministry of Magic- "You don't have to apologize, Moony. If I was in your shoes, I would have reacted the same way. No one but me knew that Peter was responsible for what happened. For a long while, I thought that Peter had simply crawled into the sewers and wasted away. Then I saw that picture in the Prophet . . . " "You have quite a good eye, Sirius. I would have never recognized Peter's Animagus form from a mere picture. It was too common. I would have just mistaken it for a rat." A silence fell between the two men. "Where do we go from here?" Sirius whispered. Remus said nothing. Instead, he leaned forward and captured his former lover's lips with his own. It was not only relighting an old spark, but all sorts of new sparks started flying right along with the old. The comfort, the closeness, was amazing. "Sirius, I missed you. You have no idea . . . I could never move on, and when I found out you were innocent, I knew why." Sirius merely smiled. "When I was in Azkaban, I always found myself wishing that you would move on. I'm glad you didn't." Remus helped Sirius to his feet. "I know this is a time of crisis, but do you think we can go find a few moments of comfort?" Sirius grinned. "Of course. It is a reunion, after all." The two began walking out of the room, hand in hand. They weren't in any hurry, and there was no sense of urgency. Their first night back together should be taken slowly, as if to savor each moment. When they had reached the door, Remus paused. "By the way, who IS Harry's boyfriend?" Had anyone else been in the room, they would not have heard Sirius' mumbled reply. Remus, on the other hand, did. "WHAT?" * * * I feel as if I'm in a haze, mentally and physically. Something is surrounding my senses, taking over them. I don't know how long I've been here. Maybe I've actually been here my entire life and not known. In the life I knew before, I had many friends, but nothing that really resembled a family, aside from the Dursley's, which I refused to count. In this world, I had no friends to lean on, but I had a grandfather. A grandfather who, in my other life, was my worst enemy and a terror to the entire world. Someone who killed his own daughter and her husband in an attempt to get to their own child. The only thing that was the same in both worlds was Draco. Of course, Draco was technically in his other world - he had been for a while, and then the war started and everything was torn in two. I had been brought to Draco's world. Now I was not quite sure to which world I belonged to. I belonged with Draco, belonged TO Draco, but my dragon continues to insist that I don't belong in the dark. I feel drained, but only because I don't know where I belong, and people keep giving me conflicting answers. My grandfather tells me I belong where I am right now so I can get a better grasp on my talents. Draco simply says I'm too pure to stay with the Dark Lord. And when did I start thinking of the Dark Lord as my grandfather? I had been so ashamed of it that I hadn't even told Draco. Draco doesn't yet know who I am. He knew I was Harry Potter, son of James and Lily Potter. But he didn't know who my parents were. I hadn't even known that my mother was a Slytherin. It made sense, of course. After all, my mother was Voldemort's daughter. That makes me the Heir of Slytherin. And my father's blood makes me the Heir of Gryffindor. I wanted to puke. Why was I so special? I realized that everything special about me led back to my parents in some way. This meant I had no control over it. I just wanted to be a somewhat normal boy. An average, everyday, normal wizard. Instead, I had a mix of genes and blood within me that gave me the potential to destroy the world. My name is in all the history books, labeled for life as 'The Boy Who Lived.' And everyone who knew the story could recognize me instantly by the stupid scar on my forehead. I speak to snakes, a gift that is considered to be a Dark Art. It's not like any of the fame was my own doing. It was given to me, either biologically or the end of a wand. I had so much that others would have killed for, but I wanted none of it. I just wanted to be a boy. A young man. If this war had to happen, I didn't want to be one of the focuses of the two sides. If my parents had never been killed, I probably could have been a normal boy. It would still be a secret today about whose blood ran in my veins. It wasn't Voldemort's fault, not entirely. It was someone else. One who had been deceiving me since I stepped back into the Wizarding world at age 11. He deceived me and all around me. This was all his fault. He deserved nothing. He took away any chance of normalcy I had. He would die. * * * -Malfoy Manor- "The boy is breaking." "Yes, my Lord." Lucius Malfoy was on his knees in front of Lord Voldemort. The Dark Lord had a somewhat excited expression on his face, but had not once looked at Lucius. "Your son and Harry Potter make a marvelous couple. I can tell that there is more than just lust between those two." "What? My son?" "You figured that your son would just be using Potter? No. There is genuine love there." Lucius was speechless. "Well, Lucius, you should be proud of your son. He made an outstanding catch with that boy. And I really wouldn't be worrying about him giving you a Malfoy heir just yet - he's a bit young to be having children." "I know that, my Lord. It's just . . . I never figured that Draco would love Potter back." "It seems that something in the two of them softened toward each other. It's making it all the easier to break Harry Potter." "Yes, my Lord." Voldemort sat back in his chair, contemplating the next steps ahead of him. "I think it would be particularly romantic for them to be initiated together." Lucius felt his heart skip a beat as excitement filled him. "My son is finally to be initiated into the Death Eaters?" Voldemort narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean, 'finally?' Draco is four years younger than you were when you were initiated, and you were one of the youngest of all time." "I don't mean to make it sound like a burden. It's just that he knows he has been destined to be one of your servants since the day he was born. Before he was born, in fact." Voldemort smiled at Lucius. "I am going to tell you something, Lucius. You may not believe it, but it will make you all the prouder of your son." "Yes, my Lord?" "Harry Potter is a very special, very powerful young man." "My Lord, he's simply a boy - " "A boy who has my blood in his veins. He is my grandson." Lucius blinked, then stared in disbelief. "Your . . . grandson? How can that be? Lily Evans was Muggle-born, and I know who James' parents were." "Lily was a Slytherin, was she not?" "Yes, she was. She was one of our best, even though she was a Mudblood." Voldemort smirked. "Lily Evans was no Mudblood. She was my daughter. The woman that carried her ran from me when she realized what my goals were. She disagreed with them. Damn Gryffindor. "She died in childbirth, and her daughter was given to a Muggle family. Horrid, horrid creatures, but I could never go and scoop my daughter away from them. The house was hidden from my power. "Lily went to Hogwarts, and met a James Potter. James Potter was also very special, in his own way. He was a descendant of Merlin." "Merlin? James Potter was?" "Indeed. I know about your fling with that particular Potter, as well. Like fathers, like sons, I suppose. "James carried the blood of Gryffindor within him. He passed it onto his son." Lucius could barely contain himself. "Potter has that much powerful blood within him? He is the Heir of Gryffindor AND Slytherin!" "Yes. Now do you understand why it's so important we have Harry Potter added to our ranks? He is vital to this war. It's an easy conclusion that whatever side Harry Potter is on, will be the winning side. It is crucial that we initiate him soon." "Yes, my Lord." "And since he is my grandson, I want his initiation to be special. Draco will be initiated as well." "Yes, my Lord." "Dismissed, Lucius." * * * -Seven Months Ago, Hogwarts- "Baron?" Through Draco's floor came a very dark, very bloody, and very transparent figure. Unlike the other ghosts of Hogwarts, the Bloody Baron barely looked human. His eyes were not eyes, but just darkness. His face was abnormally long. A very small mouth opened as the Baron spoke. "Yes, Mister Malfoy?" "What are we?" Draco asked. "We are friends." The Baron, despite his outward nastiness, was rather friendly toward those in his house. He had formed an unusual bond with the newest Malfoy, and was the only being, dead or alive, that Draco completely confided in. "If we are friends, what are I and Harry?" "That is a harder question. What are your feelings toward him?" "At first, it was the irony of it all, which evolved it into being only for the sex, to companionship, and now I think it's something more." "Love?" "I do not love." "Why not?" For a moment, Draco did not answer. "Love makes you weak." "I beg to differ. Slytherins are more passionate than any other house, and you are a Slytherin through and through. Love makes the Slytherin stronger." "I cannot allow myself to love." "And why is this?" "I cannot allow myself to love Harry Potter." Draco closed his eyes, leaning back on his bed, tucking his knees in his arms. "We will be on opposite sides of the battlefield when the war finally begins. If I love him, I will not be able to kill him." "But this war has not begun yet." "It will." "And when it does, will you be able to fight against Harry Potter?" Draco did not answer. The Baron's face twisted into something resembling a smile. "My young friend, I believe you are already in love with Harry Potter." Draco drew his body into an even tighter ball. "I can't be." "I'm terribly sorry, Mister Malfoy. No one, not even a Malfoy, can help who they fall in love with." "I'm not!" "If you allow yourself to feel, it will be easier for you. Why don't you try to stop worrying about it, and enjoy the time you have left here?" Draco looked at the Baron through narrowed eyes. "Allow myself to love?" The blond sat up, running a hand through his hair. "I could do that. I can turn my emotions off when I need to." The Baron said nothing in response to this. He had succeeded in bringing the young Malfoy an answer, although it was not the answer he had intended. "Very well, Mister Malfoy. If that's what you wish." * * * -Present Time, Unknown Location- "What is your dream, Harry Potter?" "My . . . dream?" "What do you wish?" "I don't understand." Harry closed his eyes. He had no idea how long he had been here, how long he had been away from everyone he cared about . . . ...except Draco. He had Draco. Draco was keeping him sane. "You know that you have an untapped source of power within you. What would you intend to do with that power?" If he had been asked that question when he first arrived in this . . . place, he would have answered with 'escape.' But now, Harry was confused. Apparently, his genealogy would eventually result in his power being equal to a god's. What could Harry do with that power? Anything. But what he WOULD do was a different question. There were so many things left unfinished, unresolved. Manipulation. Harry had been used. He had been controlled and conditioned from the day he was born. Everything had gone just right so he wouldn't discover the power inside of him. Harry was supposed to have died with his parents. Those planning his demise knew he was powerful, but didn't expect him to be able to tap into that power as a mere year-old baby boy. When the curse reflected, those planning his death quickly changed him into a pan. He was played like a thing without emotions, not caring whether Harry really FELT or not. Harry was kept alive for the sole purpose of permanently destroying Voldemort. And Harry had finally realized that. There was no freedom for Harry Potter in the Wizarding world. He had all this untapped power, no way to use it, and he had no freedom. "What would I do with all that power?" Harry repeated. He turned and looked at Voldemort. "I would get my freedom back." There was no emotion showing in the Dark Lord's face. "You are not a captive here, Harry." For a solid moment, Harry was confused. "That's not what I meant," he said, although he was, indeed, a captive. "I meant that I would get my freedom back from Dumbledore. I don't want to be his pawn anymore." A faint smile was appearing from the Dark Lord. "And how would you intend to do that?" "I would destroy him." Harry said it without a second thought. The smile grew, grew more, and eventually developed into laughter. * * * -Malfoy Manor- Tonight. They could escape tonight. The very thought made Draco tingle. Draco was not terribly skilled at creating portkeys, but he had managed. He had used an old book he had found in the Malfoy library. It was small, tucked away, and nearly worn to bits. He couldn't read the title, and the language within the book was one Draco did not understand. And so, at 3:24 AM, he and Harry would leave this place. Draco would be betraying everything he had been raised to believe, but he would do it. He would get Harry away from this place. Harry had taught him something vital - everyone and everything was connected. Everyone in the world was part of a web that relied on something else for its existence. This fact made Draco see that without Muggles, wizards would be nothing. It still honored him to be a pureblood, but it didn't matter to him as much anymore. He didn't care who was and who wasn't. Harry wasn't. James Potter had been a pureblood, but Lily had not. Lily was Muggle-born. "Draco?" The blond turned. Harry was awake, finally. He smiled at his lover, sitting down on the bed next to him. "Something the matter, Harry?" he asked, pushing hair away from burning green eyes. "I need to tell you something," Harry said, sitting up. Draco nodded. "Whatever you need to say, say it." He blinked, tilting his head to the side. "You've been not telling me something, and I can tell it's eating at you." "It's about my parents." Draco narrowed his eyes. Harry admired his parents to no end. What secret about his parents could possibly have Harry acting like this? "My father was a Gryffindor. My mother was not." "She was . . . a Ravenclaw?" "Slytherin." Draco sat back slightly, his eyes widening. "Wasn't your mother Muggle-born?" "She was raised by Muggles, but she had wizard parents. Her mother was in Gryffindor. Her father was in Slytherin." Draco was still confused. "Why is this so bad? Slytherins aren't all horrible, you know." A small smile was playing at Draco's lips. "I know. This Slytherin, though . . . his name was Tom Riddle." Draco stopped breathing entirely. "Tom Riddle?" he repeated faintly. "Voldemort?" "Is my grandfather." A wave of fury swept through Draco. "Is that what Voldemort told you? What reason do you have to believe him?" "It's true, Draco!" Harry snapped. "I can feel it. I've suspected that there was something more than that damn 'transference or power' Dumbledore made up in my second year. I'm a Parselmouth, the hat wanted to put me in Slytherin, and the young Tom Riddle looks almost exactly like me." Draco shook his head. "It's hard to swallow, Harry." "Tell me about it." "But I believe you." "There's more." * * * "Lucius. The initiation will happen tonight." "Tonight? I've not even had the chance to tell Draco!" "Go and fetch the two of them. Harry is breaking. The initiation will break him. I know he will agree." "Very well, my lord." -continue-
