The next few days went by in a flash. Classes were coming to a close for the winter holiday. Soon the last day of term would come, and with that, the Yule Ball.

Remus was going home for Christmas, as were his friends. He was nervous about leaving. Nervous about the Yule Ball.. hell, he was nervous to look his best friend in the eyes.


Had been nervous.


Ever since that day, in the snow.

::Such beautiful snow...:: Remus thought to himself as he stared out the window in the Common Room. Snow was falling again this evening, and Remus wished he could go back to that day. Go back to right before they kissed, and stop it.

::Anything would be better than this. Having his hand just in friendship is worth more than this strained silence between us. Like a great, insurmountable wall.::


Remus sighed sadly, and jumped when he felt hands on his shoulders.


Moony, you okay? James asked softly, looking into the tear-filled amber eyes with concern.

Remus nodded, and James sat down next to his friend on the red sofa, his hand still on Remus' shoulder comfortingly.

I'm glad you told me what happened Remus. He said softly. You have to wait, though. It's up to him now.


Remus looked up at James, frowning. What do you mean? It's over. He rejected me! Remus exclaimed, clenching his hands into fists.

Moony, you know Sirius' pride! Let him calm down. He wouldn't have kissed you if he didn't feel the same. James reasoned.

Maybe it was me who kissed him. Maybe it was all me! Remus cried out, lowering his head even farther as the tears fell more rapidly. James sighed, and pulled his friend into his arms, rocking him back and forth as he cried.

Shh... Moony, it will all work out.. you'll see. Everything will be okay in the end. He cooed, rubbing Remus' back soothingly.



***


Remus woke up early in the morning with a feeling of rising dread.


Today. Tonight.


The Yule Ball.


He would have to face Sirius. Face James, Peter.


Face his date.

Face them all knowing that his heart was broken. Knowing that it had been twisted and pulled and torn until it was ripped into a hundred little shattered bits.


He didn't know what to do. But he couldn't back down. He couldn't hide.




He was going to the Ball.




Slowly he stood, and dressed himself, before making his way to the Common Room to warm himself before the great fire.

He was surprised to see Sirius already there, and he quickly turned and went back to the Dorm, sighing.

He sat down on the edge of his bed, and pulled out his dress robes, looking them over for the hundredth time that week.


They were a soft purple hue, made of velvet. Gentle swirls of shiny color were mixed in the fabric, making the wearer appear to be sparkling. Remus knew that in the soft lights of the Great Hall that night, he'd look fabulous.

But he didn't care.

Not unless Sirius noticed.


::You're being silly.:: He chastised himself. ::Sirius will be there with a date. A girl date. As will you.::


He reluctantly put the dress robes away, and walked to the Common Room, to see Sirius gone.

Both relief and disappointment welled up inside of him at the observation, and with a heavy heart and mind, he walked out of the common room, and to the Great Hall.


***


Upon reaching the Great Hall, Remus discovered two things.


One, not many people got up this early, including some professors.

And two, Sirius had not come here.


Remus looked out the great windows toward the front of the hall to see that it was raining.

::Twice in the last few weeks!:: He thought to himself. ::That's so odd! Raining in winter.. must be warm out today.::

He walked to the Gryffindor table, relieved that since Sirius wasn't here he wouldn't have to go about the chore of finding somewhere else to sit.

He sat down and began to eat, not really tasting the food. Instead, with every bite he tasted Sirius' kiss. Tasted the warm lips against his own. Tasted the soft breath of the one he loved. Desired.



As more students (and professors) began to arrive, Remus was already finished eating, and he hurried to his first class, so as not to be forced to face his friends. Or Sirius.


He was quite early for Transfiguration, but it didn't matter. After he had sat down, the only thing he thought of was that night. The Yule Ball.


::Poor Willow.:: He thought to himself. ::What have I gotten myself into this time? I shouldn't have even agreed to go. We'd all be better off for it.::


Sirius walked into the class room, and saw Remus almost immediately. Their eyes met before Sirius could avoid it, and he found himself lost in the amber color that seemed to go on forever.

Remus felt himself slipping into the rich color or Sirius' eyes. Slipping further and further.

::This is how my life should be.:: He thought. ::Constantly lost in this man. Lost in his eyes. In his lips, in his warmth that surrounds me as he holds me in his arms.::

As if reading Remus' thoughts, Sirius quickly looked away, and took a seat on the opposite end of the room.

::Yet again... maybe not.::


***

That's it for a day or so... sorry to end it there, but I want the next chapter to be basically just the Yule Ball. What will happen? ...Well, you'll just have to wait to find out. ^_^;;

Until the next chapter, everyone. Cheers!