* Chapter eight – Gordo *
"Which one, Gordo?" Lizzie said, holding up three sleeping bags. I looked over them, wondering how many ways sleeping bag designers could combine pink and purple to make a pattern.
"I'll take… the pink and purple one!" I said sarcastically. Lizzie rolled her eyes and sighed.
"Thanks Gordo. That's really helpful."
"Sorry. I'll take the one without the flowers and hearts - it's more, um, masculine." I said. Lizzie laughed and Miranda emitted a cough that sounded suspiciously like, 'freak'. I took the sleeping bag and glared at Miranda in mock anger.
"What? You don't think I'm masculine?" I said, pretending to be hurt. Lizzie laughed. I looked at her, and my heart melted. Her laugh penetrated my very soul, causing my head to spin in confusion. I loved it when she was happy – it seemed like the world laughed along with her…
"Gordo, you're not a guy! You're just… Gordo!" Miranda said, laughing. She and Lizzie slapped their hands behind Miranda's back.
"Ha, ha. Very funny." I said, spreading out my sleeping bag on the floor. Lizzie tossed hers next to me and Miranda rolled hers out by Lizzie. Standing up, Lizzie turned out the light. It was dark for a moment while Lizzie shuffled around. Finally, a dim light was cast around the room, lighting up Lizzie's beautiful face. She looked like an angel descending from heaven…
You are going to get yourself in trouble these days, Gordon. I told myself, desperately trying to block out my thoughts and emotions, where will you be if Lizzie found out your feelings? What then, old boy?
Lizzie sat down cross-legged on her sleeping bag and set the flashlight down, its light playing across the ceiling. She smiled at me.
"So, what now?" She asked, looking at me and biting her lip. I blushed, unnoticed because of the lighting. It was pure luck that saved me from total rejection and embarrassment, not good timing. I looked at Miranda, but she wasn't paying attention.
"Me?" I said, raising my eyebrows, "perfect McGuire is going to ask me? What about your dignity? Won't it be shattered, talking to a lowlife like me?"
Lizzie rolled her eyes, but laughed just the same, "And if I am?" She scooted closer to me, eyes shining. I chuckled.
"I would be amazed." I said, smiling. I couldn't believe she couldn't see me. I was always there for her. After all her heartaches, she came to me. Me, David Gordon, not her mom or dad. Not Miranda. Even so, I was bleeding inside, knowing that Lizzie would never look at as more than a friend.
Lizzie's laugh brought me back to my senses.
"Gordo, you look like you've seen a ghost! What's wrong?"
'Oh, not much. It's just, Lizzie, I like you a lot. I like you as more than a friend. No, scratch that, I'm in love with you…'
"Uh, nothing. Just, thinking, you know? About what we're going to do. Miranda, do you have an idea?" I said quickly, exasperated with myself.
Tell her.
Don't tell her.
Tell her.
Don't tell her.
It went on and on, forever and ever. I couldn't reach a decision. Tell her, and get rejected, or leave it alone and get torn up inside. It was a no-win situation, and it was making my life miserable.
"Hmmm…" Miranda started, looking at the ceiling as if she expected it to talk to her. After a while, she shrugged; "I dunno."
One by one we shook our heads. Suddenly, Miranda snapped her fingers.
"Let's talk about the dance!" She said enthusiastically. I looked at her, contempt hidden beneath a smile. If I didn't know better, I would have thought that she brought up the Spring Dance on purpose. But no, it was just a coincidence. I lowered my head. Great. Now I would have to live through a heartbreaking conversation about Lizzie's date with Ethan. Ethan this, Ethan that.
I guess smarts don't mean anything to girls. {A/N: I know, I know, not true. Just hang with me here! Angst, people, angst!}
"Yeah, whatever, Miranda," I found myself saying venomously. Miranda looked at me and raised her eyebrows.
"Look who got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning - jeez, what's gotten into you, Gordo? You're acting weird." Miranda said. I could've sworn she was grinning.
"Never mind…" I said, grumbling. Lizzie gazed at me in worry and I looked down at my pink and purple sleeping bag, fingering the zipper.
"Gordo, are you sure you're okay? You can talk to us, you know… we're your friends." Lizzie said, sounding a little hurt. My mouth went dry.
"Seriously, you guys, I'm fine. It has absolutely nothing to do with either of you." I lied, smiling brightly, suddenly becoming fascinated with the floor; "I'm sorry. I shouldn't lay my problems down on you two."
Lizzie looked satisfied, but Miranda just shook her head. She was mumbling under her breath.
Awkward silence followed. I could feel myself blushing, my hands shaking. I was at a loss for words. They had to know now… had to know… how could I keep a secret like this for so long? It was stupid, absurd. In the end, I always knew I would ruin everything…
"I'm going to hit the sack. I'm beat." I said, lying down. I heard the rustling of Lizzie's sleeping bag next to mine as she snuggled in for the night. I breathed deeply and closed my eyes, moving a hand behind my head.
"Goodnight, Gordo," Lizzie sighed softly. Her voice was the last sound I heard as I drifted into a night of slumber, dreams playing themselves in my head…
**
Voices… echoing… bodiless, yet familiar…
"H-he broke up with me! There was another girl… she's probably smarter, more beautiful, and more fun to be with than me…"
"No, that's not it."
"W-what?"
"That's not true. No one's more beautiful, or fun to be with than you."
"Do you mean it?"
"Yes."
"Thank you…"
**
"You can't catch me!"
"Just watch…"
"Nah-nah!"
"Mommy!"
"Stop hurting his feelings, sweetie."
"Sorry."
"It's okay."
"Do you wanna play some more?"
"Sure!"
"I love you."
"I love you too."
**
"I need to ask you a question…"
"What is it?"
"W-will you marry me?"
"… Oh-my-God! Of course I will…"
"…This is the best thing that's happened to me since… since someone discovered makeup!"
"Very funny."
"I know – I'm so glad you think so though."
"I love you; with all my heart and soul."
"And I love you…"
**
I awoke, sweat drenching my forehead. I had just had a strange dream. I scrunched up his forehead, thinking. My dream was slipping away, even as I tried to hold onto it. I needed to think about it, because something about the dream was familiar. It was very uncanny. I sighed and wiped some sweat off my brow. I looked down at Lizzie, who was sleeping soundly, and smiled.
Lizzie grinned in her sleep and sighed, clutching her sleeping bag. Some blonde hair fell across her face. Gently, I pushed it behind her ear and sat back, watching her sleep. I yearned to tell her how I felt, to hold her tight, to be around her as someone more than just Gordo: Lizzie's best friend. Sighing softly, I watched her chest rise and fall with each breath she took. She was so perfect. She didn't think so, but I knew she was. I couldn't help smiling whenever I saw her. She could get any guy she wanted. Anybody who didn't see what I saw in her, just wasn't the right person…
I reached out a trembling finger and brushed her cheek tenderly, holding my breath. I blinked some tears out of my eyes and bowed my head, clasping my hands. I didn't think my heart would ever break, but this felt pretty close to what the feeling should be like. Tears opening slid down my face.
Suddenly I heard a shuffling noise.
"Gordo? Are you awake?" I turned my head around and saw Lizzie blink and yawn, stretching her arms. She looked at my tear-stained face.
"Gordo… what's wrong?" She asked, concern and worry clouding her features. She scooted closer and put an arm around me, resting her head on my shoulder, "you can tell me."
I shook my head, trying to ignore the feeling of Lizzie's face so close to mine, "nothing. I-I just had a weird dream."
Lizzie smiled up at me, eyes shining. She pushed some brown curls from my forehead and blushed, "was it a bad-weird dream?"
"No," I said, gulping, "it was actually the opposite. But, it was an impossible dream."
"Yeah." Lizzie said, not moving an inch, "I've had those."
"Don't you hate it?" I asked, my voice choked with emotion, "when you wake up, and you realize that… that it's not real?"
Tears filled Lizzie's eyes and she flung her arms over me, holding me in a tight embrace. Hesitantly, I put my arms around her figure and returned the hug, breathing in her scent. Lizzie snuggled deeper onto my shoulder and sighed, pulling me closer to her.
After a minute of heaven, I opened my eyes and sighed.
My eyelids felt heavy, so I whispered, "Lizzie, I'm going to sleep now."
There was no response. As gently as I could, I pulled her from my shoulder and laid her down on the floor, covering her with the rest of her sleeping bag. Then, I fell back onto my bag and pillow, thinking.
Were my feelings really just one-sided?
*Drowns in sap and fluff*
Yeah… this is the life. *ahhhh*
There ya go – Next Chapter up soon! ^_^
I love writing this story – it's so cute. Gordo is da bomb!
Ohhh… I'm so proud of myself! This chapter is actually more than 500 words long! Yeah – go me! =)
*hehe* read, read, and review!
Thank you!
Tic-Tac ^_~
