* Chapter 15 – Lizzie *

I felt horrible, and I admit, lost. I didn't know what to do. My feelings for Gordo were mixed, uncertain. I wasn't sure what to do anymore. I mean, what if he didn't even like me? Who was I fooling? Why would Gordo have feelings for me? Me: Lizzie McGuire? I wasn't anything special… more like a klutz on two legs, who can't set her priorities right.

Even still, I remembered the kiss… the non-existent space between us…

Those thoughts echoed through my head as Miranda and I walked back to the table. Gordo looked up from the table quickly as we approached, and smiled warmly at me. I gulped, and my hands were shaking. My mom stared at me in concern, and Gordo's smile melted to a bemused frown as his gaze found my quivering hands.

"Are you all right, sweetheart?" Mom asked, beckoning for me to sit down next to her. I nodded my head pitifully. The last thing I wanted was for my mom and dad to get involved in my complicated love life. I might as well lie.

"Well, okay then," my mom replied, sipping her drink and pushing it away with distaste. "Time to go!"

Gordo, Miranda, and I threw away our garbage, and headed back to my mom. Gordo seemed to be trying to get me alone, but I tried to ignore his pleas. Whenever he began to talk, I would turn my conversation to Miranda. I couldn't bear to talk to him. I didn't want to see his sweet face, his chocolate-brown hair, his bright, inquisitive eyes… I didn't want to look at him and yearn for another kiss. Not now.

I wasn't sure what I wanted. Part of me pined for his love, and the other part was confused.

"Ready kids?" my mom asked, picking up her purse. Unanimously we nodded, and she herded us out the door, steering us towards the exit of the mall. In the back of my mind, I was disappointed. Shopping could get my mind off other… things. Miranda looked at my mom curiously, obviously noticing this also. I didn't dare look at Gordo.

"I thought you said we were going to get things for the dance," she pointed out, stopping in her path. My mom shrugged her shoulders, and yawned.

"I don't really feel like going right now." She paused, and shifted her purse. "Besides, I just realized that Lizzie has really good dresses already. This one dance is not that important anyway." She grinned; "just wait until you have Prom. Then we'll get you something fancy and frilly."

I rolled my eyes. "Mom, that's like, a million years away…"

She smiled, a dreamy look crossing her face for a second. "It might not be as far away as you think."

"Oh please. Spare us," I said sarcastically, walking in a huff towards the exit without them. I was sure they exchanged perplexed glances, but I wasn't in the mood. Why was my mother all of a sudden talking about the most romantic things she could think of? Did she know anything that I was trying to hide?

I laughed confidently to myself. Of course not! Right?

On the way home, my mom dropped off Miranda and Gordo at their appropriate houses. Otherwise then saying goodbye, I was silent, thinking of the problems that I was suddenly faced with. Miranda had been a breeze – she had said bye and left, mouthing 'call me'. Gordo however…

::FLASHBACK::

I walked Gordo quickly up to his door, partly because I wanted to get away from my mom, and partly because I just wanted… well, I didn't know what I wanted. Besides, we couldn't really do anything even if I wanted to; my mom was watching us, and if we took too long, she would start honking. I looked over my shoulder at her, and turned to face Gordo.

"I'll see you later, I expect," I said nervously, biting my lip. Gordo nodded, and I blushed as his eyes swept over me.

"Yeah, guess so."

We both grinned quickly, and I twiddled my thumbs. "You know, Gordo -," I started. Realizing what I was about to say, I stopped and changed tactics. "I-I mean, how about you come over soon? After school or something? We can dedicate half of the time for movies, half for talking, and half for just… other stuff."

Gordo grinned and leaned forward, making my heart stop. "That's three halves," he whispered, chuckling. I giggled and rolled my eyes, disappointed, but not sure why...

"Only you would notice that Gordo," I said, punching his arm. Gordo smiled innocently and batted his eyelashes. I couldn't help but smile.

"But that's why you love me!" he said, laughing. I sighed exasperatedly.

"Whatever. If you feel the need to think that, do so." Gordo laughed shortly, and nodded towards my mom's car.

"I guess you need to go now," he said. A look of regret passed over his features. But, if it was just an illusion, I didn't know, because he smiled and pushed me gently towards the car. "Go, McGuire – your mom is waiting."

It was my turn to bat my eyelashes. "Carry me?"

That notion has potential, I thought to myself.

Gordo rolled his eyes. "If I could, I would."

"Really?"

"No."

"Fine then," I said stubbornly, "when you're older and I have my own house, then you'll be sorry. You'll be waiting at my doorstep to carry me, and I'll refuse. I'll kick you out." Gordo just laughed and smiled.

"We'll see, Liz, we'll see."

::END OF FLASHBACK::

Was Miranda right? Were our friendly arguments and games actually considered flirting? Was I flirting with Gordo without even knowing what I was doing? It just felt so right to talk to him like that. It was not at all like trying to talk with someone like Ethan. I didn't have to think about what to say – I just say it.

Mom looked back at me, sitting in the backseat with my head in my hands, but I ignored her, still deep in my thoughts. She smiled quickly and turned around to look back at the road.

"Okay, we're home!" Mom called, breaking me out of my daydream. I jumped out of the car, grabbing my heavy shopping bag and slinging it over my shoulder. Mom put a hand to her mouth, closing the garage door and yawning loudly.

"I-I'm s-s-so tired!" she said, walking through the door and placing her keys on a hook. "Lizzie, I'm going to take a nap, okay? Matt and Dad are in the back." I watched as she climbed the stairs, turning around the corner and disappearing from sight. I sighed quietly, and walked upstairs to put my new clothes away.

I walked through the door and smiled, seeing the sleeping bags still spread out on the floor. I kneeled down and began to gather them up; shoving them into their appropriate cases, and walking to my closet, reaching up to push them behind everything else on the top shelf. As I did so, I looked over into the corner, and spotted Miranda's suitcase. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Guess I'll have to get this to her soon," I said to myself, picking it up and throwing it onto my bed. I put her sleeping bag case and pillow next to it to remind myself what I had to do later. Absentmindedly, I began to clean my room. I threw most of my accessories and clothes in my closet, and I piled all of my dirty garments in a corner of my room. After a while of doing work to clear my head, I pulled my hair back in a ponytail and collapsed onto my bed. I pulled my favorite blanket over myself, and sighed, fingering the fabric insentience.

I shut my eyes, but I couldn't block out my thoughts. Everything I knew, everything I wanted was pieced together into one person: Gordo. I couldn't stop thinking about him. I love everything about him; the way he can joke around without making me upset, his smile, his character, his everything. I shivered under my blanket. I loved how he looked at me… I loved his tender touch. Whenever we brushed against each other, my heart would begin to pound. I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself not to cry. My breath shuddered. I never want to lose him. I never want to hurt him. I just wanted to be with him and feel his presence around me, comforting me. I wanted him to look deep into my eyes and smile. I wanted to feel his lips against mine yet again…

I took a deep breath and opened my eyes, looking up at the ceiling. Suddenly, a thought crossed my mind, making my heart flutter nervously.

"Oh-my-god…" I said to myself, clutching my blanket over my chest, "I love him."

Out of nowhere, a familiar laugh rang throughout my room, making my heart clench in shock.

"Aww… isn't that sweet?"

I sat up in my bed and snapped my head around, staring at the intruder.

"Matt! You freak… y-you moron! How long have you been standing there?!"

Matt laughed at sat at the foot of my bed, practically bursting with happiness and pleasure.

"Long enough."

I balled my hands into fists. "You had better explain yourself Weasel, before I use this." I held up my fists threateningly. Matt was unfazed. He yawned, and pulled a Kodak envelope from behind his back. He opened it quickly, and looked inside. I leaned over to see, but he pulled it out of my reach, and brandished it in front of my face. I glared at him.

"Just go!" I cried, trying to return to my thoughts.

"I guess you won't be needing these, then," Matt said smoothly. He smiled devilishly, and sighed. "They're awfully cute."

I made a desperate grab, but Matt clicked his tongue and shook his head. "You want these? I have a price."

Glaring, I crossed my arms over my chest. "I don't make deals with worms."

Matt glanced at them again. "Ohhh… what should I do with these? Give them to Kate? Give them to Mom and Dad? Or, maybe, I could sell them on Ebay!"

"Matt! What are they?!" I almost shrieked. Suddenly, I had a distinct idea. My heart pounded loudly. "Oh no…"

"'Oh no' is right, big sis. Who knew you were such a good kisser? Well, if I needed to know, I could just go ask G –" I clapped a hand over his mouth and stared at the door as if I expected it to melt into my parents. Matt pried my hand from off his face and grinned, rubbing his fingers together. He smirked, and I blushed, humiliated. I hung my head.

I sighed, defeated. "What do you want?"

Ohhh… isn't Matt bad? I'm glad I don't have a little brother *that* horrible! Well, actually, mine *is* pretty bad, but… I doubt he would do something like that! ^_^ *hehe* that's good enough for me! Anyways… *cough* lol

Please R/R, and watch for Sunshine Belle and my story, "No One Knows". Thanx a bunch! Much love!

Hope to hear from you soon ~ I appreciate all of your kind words… ^_^

Luv ya ~

Tic-Tac  ^_~