Disclaimer- Don't own PotC, Will, Elizabeth, or Jack. Wish I owned Orlando, maybe someday I will. I don't want to be sued, so please don't.

Jack's Kind Of Secret Diary (that he shows to people in his drunkness heehumm)

Entry 1: Today was very busy. Aye, verrrryyyy boosssiiiieeeee.erm busy. Many days have been boisoie.erm busy. I picked up Bootie's lad looking for his bonnie lass. ::takes gulp of rum:: And my plans are all ruined! Ruined! My bloody ship is ruined.wait.ah. Never mind. Rum's getting to me. Savvy? But that would be a rhetorical question since I'm writing this down. What does rhetorical mean.? Too much rum, mate.

Entry 2: : Today was bloody brilliant. We went to torblublah. Downside is got slapped by too many lasses. Face has lost all feeling. Also, it was an added bonus when Will kept whining about being blinded. Why does everyone keep insulting my pirate capabilities? It's bloody insane. I've been very boosey.erm busy. Why the bloody hell can't I spell boplobsie.erm busy.the first time? Too much rum, mate.

Entry 3: Gots me a crew. Who's the worst pirate you've ever seen now, eh? Ran into a nasty storm, and Will got all wet. When we went after him with a towel he shrieked like a lass and started running away. Locked himself in the bloody galley. Anna Maria slapped me again today. I think she's bloody jealous of my dreads, cause she ain't bloody good enough for them. Too much rum, mate.

Entry 4: We were about to save the lad's lass when the stupid boy hit me on the head with a paddle. That was a problem when I woke up and found the crew of the Black Pearl around me. Thought I was dead for a bloody moment. Also had problems remembering how to say "parlay". Too much rum, mate.

Entry 5: Black Pearl took me to my ship, but then I eventually had to walk the plank (the story from before that is toooo hard to bloody explain) with the bonnie lass because Bootie's boy is daft. Got lots of rum on the island though, so maybe the girl will get really drunk.heh. Too much rum, mate.

Entry 5 continued- Got lass drunk. But lass was too foolish to get past singing the bloody song. Very tired and very drunk. Must sle-

Entry 6- Girl burned up all my rum. The beeyaa, why she messing with my groove? She's always in my face, foo. Ok, had a drunk moment there.Anyways, the bloody navy rescued us. Blah blah blah.I think I'll go and save the daft boy now. Too much rum, mate.

Entry 7- Making a long story short, I won. Yay. Found out the commodore is engaged to the lass. Isn't he a tad old.and wrinkly? She should've slept with me when she had a chance. Too bad, her loss. WAY too much rum, mate.

Entry 8- Almost got hanged, was aided in getting away by Mini-Bootie (what is up with him and his sexy poses?). Told Lizzie she could've had a chance. Told Will I liked his hat even though it slightly disturbed me. Then I fell over the side of this rock thing, drank a bit, and swam to my ship. Too much rum to talk anymore. Will write later. Savvy?