Names From a Hat- Odd Harry Potter Pairings
By The Two Trumpeteers
Chapter One – Millicent and Kreacher
A/N: We were having fun with the thesaurus in this chapter. This is the first in a series of… ::stops to count on their fingers:: many, MANY chapters, each with a different pairing drawn from a hat. Flames accepted, but not appreciated. We post this for our own enjoyment and amusement, so we don't care if you don't like it. Now PLEASE be a good sport and review, and, umm, have fun? Nah, that didn't sound right… Ummm, best wishes? Nopsie! Happy Christmas! Yeah, that's it! Just read!
Kreacher the house-elf stared into his deceased master's old mirror, which he had stolen earlier that day. There was longing in his heart, oh yes. But for what? His masters, Mr. and Mrs. Black, had been gone for so long… the missus' portrait still remained, but it wouldn't suffice.
His heart screamed in agony as he dusted off the dresser in the room where that mudblood-loving scum's son and that Potter boy were staying. And a picture caught his eye.
Students. Children. Filthy little brats, all waving and smiling. But one caught his eye. She had dark hair and a mediocre face, but his heart soared. He fingered the picture and thought/murmured, "Someday you will be mine."
***
Millicent Bulstrode looked at her sullen features in the girls' lavatory and sighed. Her looks did nothing to get the attention of the person she really wanted: Vincent Crabbe.
Ever since she saw Vinny's (as she had been known to call him to herself) fist smack into his palm on the first day of school, Millicent knew she would never be the same. Of course, there was still the matter of getting Crabbe to notice her. Then, suddenly, she looked at something that was crumpled in her robes.
It was from that mudblood girl she had cornered in Professor Umbridge's office the year before (she hadn't worn the robes since). It was a moving picture of a scowling, old house elf. She didn't get a perfect projection, but what she did see was congenial. He's hot, Millicent thought to herself. He'll get Vinny jealous, that's for sure.
Humming absentmindedly to herself, she forgot completely about washing her hands, as she had set out to do, Millicent held the picture of her newfound helper close to her chest, and walked out of the bathroom.
***
Kreacher crawled into his little nook back at the House of Black. He threw off the colorful patchwork quilt that had turned up there the previous Christmas- Mudblood germs!- and hugged the picture that he had stolen from the Potter boy, inserted a knobbly thumb into his mouth, and fell asleep.
He had very odd dreams. That sullen-faced, raven-haired girl was there. They were flying. Flying. Flyinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng!
The old elf snapped awake. He had to find her. She was haunting him. He had not felt love such as this since- well, he had never really felt emotion towards anyone except his masters. "I will ask the Mistress's permission," he thought/said decisively. And this was sort of a miracle, because house-elves very seldom think decisively, but anyway. "I WILL FIND HER! I LOVE HER! SHE WILL BE MINE!"
He crept out of bed and set off towards the Mistress's portrait. "She will understand," he thought/muttered. Slowly and silently, he drew back the curtains. "Mistressssssssssssssss," he hissed. "Old Kreacher has come, old Kreacher has a question, yes he does."
He half expected her to screech and wail, but instead, she fixed a surprisingly level gaze on him. Or, rather, a surprisingly level gaze on the spot some three feet to the right of him. "What would that be, my most loyal? You haven't been to see me in so long, and yet you have remained faithful. Anything, you must ask me, dear elf, and I will grant it to you."
"Oh, Mistress," said Kreacher, and felt tears coming to his moldy eyes. "I have found, my mistress, my one true love! She is beautiful and cunning and wise! Kreacher is thinking she could share my den." He brandished the picture in front of her portrait.
"My, she is a pretty one, though not as lovely as I," said Mrs. Black, drawing herself up. "Well, if you would like to go find her, as long as you return, whether with or without her, you go with my blessing."
The tears in Kreacher's decaying eyes spilled over. "Oh, Mistress! I knew you would understand, I'll bring her back, yes I will, and most promptly!" And with that, he snapped his fingers twice and was gone.
***
Millicent grabbed her nightie and was about to put it on when she looked down at herself. She had been in the kitchens all night, trying to see if any of the house-elves matched her pictures, to no avail. She had slumped up the stairs to go to bed when she realized just now: she had a half of a day of classes left and she hadn't had lunch (A/N: Mike moment! LOL!).
She heaved a sigh and trudged back down the stairs. She headed over to the portrait of the bowl of fruit next to the Slytherin common room. She tickled the pear and entered.
"I want something to eat!" She demanded, but her breath caught in her throat. There was the house elf that was in her picture. He wasn't exactly as congenial as she saw in the photo, though. His eyes were strangely festering, and his skin seemed to be some sort of brown rubber. He looked at her and smiled, but it was a strange smile. For one thing, his teeth seemed to be growing at least ten species of fungi. For another, they all seemed to be rotting and at the brink of falling out. Bad for kissing, she thought.
"Hello, beautiful miss. I am Kreacher the house elf, servant to The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. Kreacher saw your striking features in a photograph, yes he did, and had to come see if you really were as eye-catching as you looked."
Millicent was taken aback. Absolutely speechless, in fact. She saw past the nauseating features. She actually found them quite attractive. I won't be dating him as a toy. I will date him, and really date him.
With that she leaned down, planted a kiss on his forehead, and walked out of the kitchens, not hungry anymore.
***
Kreacher never went home.
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A/N: Like it? Review! Hate it? Heck, we don't care! When this is complete (i.e. when we've used up all the names in our hat), we'll ask you for more pairings! ANY pairings go in this fanfic! ^ - ^ Thanks for reading! Happy New Year!
-- Maddie and Juli, the Two Trumpeteers
