The blinding flash of light spun and pulled them uncomfortably.  The white faded into green, and the green grew closer, closer!  And then there was black as they made impact.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oof!  Gerroff me!" Ron grunted a little later, trying to shove Paula off of where her body was pinning him to the ground.  He had little trouble, as she was very light.  She fell in a heap, not so much because she was hurt, but more because she didn't want to get up on her own.  Ron heaved himself to his feet and offered her a hand, rather grudgingly.  "Here…"

Once they were level, he found himself suddenly looking into her creepy green eyes.  He smiled, rather like the way he'd been smiling at young Leila.  "I'm Ron."

"I'm Paula.  Meep!"  And, much to Ron's disappointment, she skipped off to attack Julianna.  He watched her retreat with a small smile lingering on his lips.

"Ron…" came Hermione's voice, cutting into Ron's thoughts.  "Could you give me a hand?"

She could not possibly have seen the interaction between her boyfriend and the wonderful fair-haired Paula.  Hermione was pinned under Joseph's cow, who looked like she would prefer a comfier cushion than a girl.

Ron grinned weakly, pointing his wand.  "Sure thing, Mione.  Wingardium Leviosa!"  He felt a small twinge of guilt as he said the spell.  Granted, he and Hermione hadn't exactly traipsed around levitating cows in their past, but the spell itself held so many memories… he tried not to think about it.

"Urrrghhh…" Harry rubbed the back of his head as he sat up.  "At least I didn't get hit with anyone.  Are you all okay?"

There were general nods from five of the Catholic schoolgirls and all wizarding parties.  The cow, hovering still in midair, even managed an encouraging "Mooooo."  The ghosts were inert and Mrs. Tocci was unconscious.

"Uhhh… where's Emily?" Laura asked.

"Holy shit!  Look over there guys!" Julianna yelped.

Everyone else had managed to land on soft grass or slightly less soft people.  Emily had landed on a rock.

She was just stirring back to consciousness when they arrived.  "Why me?" she moaned.  "It's always me…. I'm so accident-prone!  Why me?"

"Can you get up?  Are you okay?"  There was temporary hustle and bustle, and Lupin helped her to her foot, as it were.  He handed her a bit of chocolate as well, unsure of what else to do.

"I'm fine… I just need a place to… rest."  She stood unsteadily, all her weight off her left leg.

"Whoaaa!  There's a house over there!" Rachel said, pointing like an air traffic controller.

"The Last Homely House!" Kathleen said incredulously, and yet in a manner very similar to the way King Arthur announced "Camelot!" in Monty Python.  "See?  See?  I told you!  We're in Middle-earth!  It's… Rivendell!"

As if on cue, a song broke out from one of the trees near the house.

"O!  What are you doing,

and where are you going?

Your cow is mooing!

The river is flowing!" the voices sang.

"ADD!" Laura whispered to Rachel, struggling to keep a straight face, "The singers have ADD!"

"They sound like Alvin and the Chipmunks!" Rachel chuckled.

"O! Tra-la-la-lally

down here in the valley!

O! What are you seeking,

And where are you making?

The faggots are reeking,

The bannocks are baking!

O! Tril-lil-lil-lolly

The valley is jolly,

Ha! Ha!

To fly would be folly,

To stay would be jolly

And listen and hark

Till the end of the dark

To our tune!

Ha! Ha!"

"Ha!  Ha!" Julianna had started to sing along.  Paula had started headbanging to the cheery tune, feeling very at home.

"Elves!" Emily murmured to herself in awe.  "We really are in Rivendell!"

Kathleen smirked.  "Told ya so."

"Master Elrond is expecting you!" giggled one of the elves.

"Elf-man!  Elf-man!" sang Rachel.

"Follow us!" chirped another elf, "Off to Rivendell!"

(Disclaimer: the elf song is from The Hobbit.  Not me (except I replaced "Your pony needs shoeing" with "Your cow is mooing.")  Still, it is not mine.  It's pretty enjoyable though, tril-lil-lil-lolly!)