Scene 2
Peter walks into the Darling's back garden. He finds his football behind a
bush next to Nana the dog. Nana, startled by Peter, starts to howl. Wendy
Darling comes to the window.
Wendy: NANA! Will you be quiet!
[Suddenly she sees Peter]
Who are you?
[She comes running into the garden]
Peter: I'm Peter Pan.
Wendy: Yeah right
Peter: No really, I am
Wendy: Okay then. How many lost boys are there?
Peter: Eight
Wendy: Correct. What is Peter Pan's favourite colour and why?
Peter: Well that's easy. Blue of course. Because it's the colour of the
sky.
Wendy: You must be Peter Pan, but you look so different!
Peter: Fashion changes a lot.
[John and Michael Darling appear]
John: Who are you?
Peter: Peter Pan
Michael: Aren't you meant to be wearing green tights? You do in the
storybooks.
Peter: Oh come on- they were written ages ago. You've got to move with the
times kid.
Michael: Can we go to Never- Never land?
Peter: If you want to, but we'll have to worry or we'll miss the bus.
Wendy: Bus!
Peter: You know those big metal things on four wheels, which take people
places.
Wendy: I know what a bus is. I'm not stupid. But why can't we fly?
Peter: I got my license taken away. The Never land government didn't really
approve of me racing with aeroplanes. They said it was too dangerous.
Wendy: I'm not surprised. You could have been killed.
Peter: No, not dangerous for me. Dangerous for people on the aeroplanes.
Passengers kept fainting because they thought they saw a flying boy
outside.
John and Michael: Oh!
Wendy: But how is a bus going to get us to Never-land?
Peter: It's a magical flying bus obviously. It will be here any second now.
Look here it comes.
[CRASH! The bus collides with the Darling's house. Part of the wall
collapses. Two very shaken bus drivers emerge.]
Peter: Aren't you Stan and Ernie, the drivers of the Knight Bus in Harry
Potter?
Ernie: We used to drive it but we got sacked. They accused us of constantly
falling asleep and crashing it. Can you believe that? Like we would do such
a thing.
[Peter glances at the wreckage behind them]
Peter: Anyway.
Stan: The bus should still work, best be off.
Wendy: But what about the damage?
Ernie: You've got insurance, haven' ya?
Wendy: No. I'm only twelve.
Stan: In that case, send an owl to Mr Fudge, Minister of magic. He'll pay.
[Ernie and Stan climb back inside the bus]
Peter: We need a builder
Wendy: So we do
All: BOB THE BUILDER
[Enter Bob, holding his cat, waddling along to the theme tune of Bob the
Builder]
Peter: Look Bob, the bus has knocked down the wall.
Wendy, John and Michael: BOB THE BUILDER. CAN YOU FIX IT?
Bob: Well it's gonna cost you a couple of hundred pounds to clear the
rubble, 'bout five hundred for a new wall. Around a thousand for steel
supports, seven hundred for labour and frequent coffee breaks with
biscuits, but yeah I think so.
[Everyone is looking slightly confused]
Peter: You've never seen the programme, have you?
Peter walks into the Darling's back garden. He finds his football behind a
bush next to Nana the dog. Nana, startled by Peter, starts to howl. Wendy
Darling comes to the window.
Wendy: NANA! Will you be quiet!
[Suddenly she sees Peter]
Who are you?
[She comes running into the garden]
Peter: I'm Peter Pan.
Wendy: Yeah right
Peter: No really, I am
Wendy: Okay then. How many lost boys are there?
Peter: Eight
Wendy: Correct. What is Peter Pan's favourite colour and why?
Peter: Well that's easy. Blue of course. Because it's the colour of the
sky.
Wendy: You must be Peter Pan, but you look so different!
Peter: Fashion changes a lot.
[John and Michael Darling appear]
John: Who are you?
Peter: Peter Pan
Michael: Aren't you meant to be wearing green tights? You do in the
storybooks.
Peter: Oh come on- they were written ages ago. You've got to move with the
times kid.
Michael: Can we go to Never- Never land?
Peter: If you want to, but we'll have to worry or we'll miss the bus.
Wendy: Bus!
Peter: You know those big metal things on four wheels, which take people
places.
Wendy: I know what a bus is. I'm not stupid. But why can't we fly?
Peter: I got my license taken away. The Never land government didn't really
approve of me racing with aeroplanes. They said it was too dangerous.
Wendy: I'm not surprised. You could have been killed.
Peter: No, not dangerous for me. Dangerous for people on the aeroplanes.
Passengers kept fainting because they thought they saw a flying boy
outside.
John and Michael: Oh!
Wendy: But how is a bus going to get us to Never-land?
Peter: It's a magical flying bus obviously. It will be here any second now.
Look here it comes.
[CRASH! The bus collides with the Darling's house. Part of the wall
collapses. Two very shaken bus drivers emerge.]
Peter: Aren't you Stan and Ernie, the drivers of the Knight Bus in Harry
Potter?
Ernie: We used to drive it but we got sacked. They accused us of constantly
falling asleep and crashing it. Can you believe that? Like we would do such
a thing.
[Peter glances at the wreckage behind them]
Peter: Anyway.
Stan: The bus should still work, best be off.
Wendy: But what about the damage?
Ernie: You've got insurance, haven' ya?
Wendy: No. I'm only twelve.
Stan: In that case, send an owl to Mr Fudge, Minister of magic. He'll pay.
[Ernie and Stan climb back inside the bus]
Peter: We need a builder
Wendy: So we do
All: BOB THE BUILDER
[Enter Bob, holding his cat, waddling along to the theme tune of Bob the
Builder]
Peter: Look Bob, the bus has knocked down the wall.
Wendy, John and Michael: BOB THE BUILDER. CAN YOU FIX IT?
Bob: Well it's gonna cost you a couple of hundred pounds to clear the
rubble, 'bout five hundred for a new wall. Around a thousand for steel
supports, seven hundred for labour and frequent coffee breaks with
biscuits, but yeah I think so.
[Everyone is looking slightly confused]
Peter: You've never seen the programme, have you?
