Disclaimer: I do not believe I own any characters in this story other than Angel and Eddie, which are my own creation. The other characters are property of ABC/Disney I do not believe I use the song listed in this chapter either-it is property of Travis Tritt.

Author's Note: Before you read this chapter I would suggest you get some Kleenex. The song I have listed is Travis Tritt's 'Tell me I was dreaming'. If you have the song on your computer or CD, why not play it in the background when you see the lyrics-it makes the scenes much more real. Anyways-tell me what you think when you get done reading.

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Jamal walked into Alison's room. They had realized she wasn't going to get a miracle, and had started to say goodbyes. Rafe had warned him that she looked bad, but just act like she was sleeping.

"Hey Spunky!" he said, walking up next to the bed. "I just wanted to let you know that it's going to be ok. Jack and I are going to help Rafe out with raising the kids. We're going to keep up the trips to the park on Wednesday afternoons. They will miss you, but we promise to let them know how you were in life. I guess on a good note, I'm going to have my own Angel watching over me up there. I'll try to behave." He started to tear up, as he gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Love you, Spunky," he was able to whisper out, as Rafe walked into the room.

"What else is there to do now?" Jamal asked, walking over to the door.

"I don't think I can do it Jamal. I don't think I can tell her goodbye. The kids need her, I need her. What if something happens and I don't know what to do?" He said, starting to tear up.

"If you get worried, remember that Elizabeth and Lucy are always there. And Jack, Reese and I are always there too. I'm going to go back to the apartment now. Call me if you need anything."

"Thanks man," he said as Jamal left. He knew Alison had always wanted to be an organ donor. The only organ's that they could use after the crash would be her eyes. He wondered if he saw the person who got them walking down the street if he'd notice. She had such beautiful eyes, they were this vibrant blue that danced when she laughed.

"Angel, I kept praying for a miracle. I guess I'm not getting one this time. Tell Dad that I don't blame him at all. I know that sometimes you get what you wish for, and other times you don't. It'll be hard to explain to the kids where you went to, but maybe one day they will understand. Maybe one day I will understand why you had to go too. Wherever I am, I will know you are looking down on me and loving me still."

"Mr. Kovich, we need to be heading over to the operating room," a nurse said, interrupting his speech.

"Please give me a few more minutes," he said, upset that he was being rushed into saying goodbye. "I guess this is it, goodbye. Not permanently, just temporarily, right? I love you, my Angel, my soul mate." He said as he brushed her hair off of her face and kissed her forehead.

--------

When I woke up this morning

Wiped the sleep from my eyes

He walked out of the room, and back into the waiting room where Lucy and Elizabeth were. He looked at them and fell into the floor. "Why? Why did he have to take her away from me? Why was I given a second chance when I only got a few years to be with her?"

Found a new day dawning

And suddenly I realize

He didn't remember much of the day, just that Lucy brought him back to the house and gave him some medicine. The doctor had said that it would help calm him and let him sleep. It did help him sleep but not well. He did remember waking up a few times yelling Alison's name, and then crying himself back to sleep at the realization that she was gone.

You're gone ----------------

Tell me I was dreaming

That you didn't leave me here to cry

Lucy stood there, staring at herself in the mirror. She hated this, having to say goodbye to a wonderful person like Alison. Ian came walking in, his suit already on. He walked up behind her and giving her a hug, "Are you going to be ok?" he asked pulling back and looking in her eyes.

"I have to be. I have to be strong for Rafe and the kids. Those two little bundles of joy," she said, starting to cry. "They are never going to get to know their mother."

You didn't say you don't love me anymore

And it was just my imagination telling lies

"Yes, but they will get to hear about her their whole life, and doesn't that amount to something?" Ian said, trying to get to her to not cry before the funeral.

"I guess so," she said, drying her eyes. Ian took her hand, kissed it, and then they left to meet everyone at the church.

Tell me that you didn't say goodbye

-----------------

Caleb picked up the paper and opened it up. He read the story once, and then read it again, making sure his eyes weren't deceiving him. The story stayed the same:

Funeral for Barrington Heiress Today

The funeral for Alison Rose Barrington Kovich will be held today at 11
AM in First United Church. Mrs. Kovich, 30, died on Saturday after
having severe injuries from a car wreck the day before. She leaves
behind her husband, Rafe Kovich, a daughter, Angel Rose Kovich, 5, a
son Edward Samuel Kovich, 21 months, her mother Elizabeth Barrington,
a sister Reese Black Ramsey and brother-in-law Jack Ramsey, her
grandmother Amanda Barrington, and many wonderful friends. She was
preceded in death by her father Malcolm Roger Barrington.

Caleb was still holding the paper when Livvie walked in and gave him a hug around the neck, "Good morning, Caleb." Her eyes wandered to what he had just read. He could feel her grip on his neck loosen as the realization of the words on the page hit her. Looking up he saw a deep sadness in her eyes.

I'm in a state of confusion

I hope things aren't what they seem

"Hey, come here," he said getting her to sit next to him. "I know it's a shock, and I'm sorry it had to happen to Alison," he said. She stretched out on the couch, with her head in Caleb's lap as he ran his fingers through her hair, trying to come up with something else to say.

If this is really happening

Just let me go back to dream

You're home

She just laid there for awhile, not yet crying but not wanting to face the day either. She looked up at Caleb, with his blue eyes focused on her, and understanding the pain she was facing right now. He gave her a kiss on the forehead and said, "Do what you have to do, Olivia." With that comment she got up off the couch, and silently walked out of the room.

---------------

Jack walked over to the bed and grabbed his suit jacket. He laughed, remembering when he bought this. Alison had him act like her rich and snotty boyfriend Chandler for her family. He sat on the bed, holding the jacket. His eyes started to tear up again when Reese walked in.

Tell me I was dreaming

That you didn't leave me here to cry

"Hey Jack," she said sitting down next to him. "I thought I heard you laughing a second ago."
"Yeah, I was thinking about when Alison had me buy this suit."

"Really? You want to tell me about it?"

"She wanted her family to think she was dating a rich snob instead of Jamal. So I dressed up in this suit, and acted like my name was Chandler."

You didn't say you don't love me anymore

And it was just my imagination telling lies

She had to laugh, thinking of her husband trying to act like a Barrington. They looked up to see Jamal walking into the room.

"Hey man," Jack said as he got up and gave Jamal a hug. "How are you doing?"

"It's hard. I'm going to miss her so much."

"Yeah, we all are. I was just telling Reese about me playing the role of Chandler."

Jamal cracked a smile, remembering the good times. They looked at each other in an awkward silence, and then headed out the door to say goodbye to a great friend.

Tell me that you didn't say goodbye ------------

Rafe walked into the church. He saw the casket at the front, draped with pink roses. He walked up to the front pew and sat next to Amanda, Elizabeth, Reese, and Jack. He had decided the night before he wanted to say a few words. When his time came he walked up to the front, gave a loud sigh, and started,

Tell me I was dreaming

That you didn't leave me here to cry

"Alison wouldn't want us to be crying. If she saw us crying right now, she'd be crying too. I want to think though that she is up there, with Karen and Eve, smiling and watching over us. That's what we need to remember, she'll be watching over us from now on. So whenever something happens, and you start to think 'I wish Alison could see this.' you don't have to wish, because she is watching.

You didn't say you don't love me anymore

And it was just my imagination telling lies

"Next I want to talk about our children. I can't raise them all by myself, and can't tell them everything about their mother. So, if you have the urge one day to take them out for ice cream and talk about their mother, please do. Tell them over and over if you feel like. Let them know how she was, how she was stubborn, and unselfish. Tell them how she would have helped every person on Earth if she could have. Most of all though, tell them how much she loved them."

Tell me that you didn't say goodbye

-----------

It was after everyone had left the cemetery when she walked over to the grave. She knelt down to the barren dirt that now covered the casket. Running her fingers through the dirt her eyes started to fill with tears. She tried to keep them back, but couldn't help it. She had always hoped their friendship could somehow be reborn again. Alison's friendship had always meant so much to her, and now she was gone. She had wanted to say something years ago at the wedding, but felt it wasn't the right time.

"Hey Alison," she said, unable to hold back the tears any longer, "I'm sorry for all I put you through, and all I put Rafe through too. I hope you can find it in your heart up there to say you forgive me. I'm glad you did have happiness in the past few years. I just wish I could have been around to share it with you. Maybe our lives will cross again somehow," She sat up and brushed the dirt off of her hands. With her arms crossed she felt him come up behind her.

"I figured this is where you went to," Caleb said, moving her hair behind her shoulder.

"I just felt like I had to do this. I know if I didn't come here today, I would never get the courage to come here."

"Do you feel any better now?"

"Yeah, I do actually," she said, as they turned around he grabbed her by the waist, holding her a little tighter than he had ever before.

---------------

That night Rafe was able to fall asleep easier than he had in the past few days. In his dream he was standing in their barn when he saw her.

"Angel, I miss you," he said, walking up to her and kissing her.

"I miss you too, but I'll see you again. You have to raise our kids now. Don't worry about me not being there. When Angel walks down the aisle I'll be there. And when Eddie has his first crush, the words coming out of your mouth will be mine too. Wherever you, or Angel, or Eddie go I will be in your heart. I love you, Rafe Kovich, and I always will," she said, giving him one last kiss and disappearing in front of him. He opened his eyes and could still feel her kiss on his lips.

--------------

Rafe was sitting at the kitchen table with Angel and Eddie. It had been a week since their mother died. He hadn't been able to explain to them completely where she was, but Angel hadn't asked anyways.

"Daddy, I know where mommy is," she said.

"And where is that?" he wondered what was about to come out of her mouth.

"She came and talked to me last night. She told me she was going to stay with Grandpa Ed and that whenever I needed her to give a big hug to my blankie and she'd be right there with me. She also told me she'll always love me."

Rafe had to put down his fork, and marvel at his little girl. Before the organ transplant he had wondered if he'd notice the person that had Alison eyes. He didn't have to wonder anymore, because he knew that whenever he wanted to see her eyes all he had to do was look at Angel and Eddie. He realized then that maybe they'd be ok on their own after all.