OK So that was about half of what i had written so far...please be patient with me as I transfer from my handwritten stuff to a typed version...Also..if you couldnt tell i am not the best typer in the world. So I apologize in advance for my crappy typing skills.

THanks for your reviews! I am glad that you are enjoying the story...I am definately enjoying writing it. I am still at the part that I have hand-written so I will keep posting as quickly as possible. Keep the reviews coming!

Now...on with the story!

******

William sat by Buffy's side clutching her hand tightly while Dawn slept on the couch at the foot of the bed. Hot. She was so hot. He got up and wrapped another warm blanket around Buffy. William sat back down beside her and squeezed her hand.

It had been two days since she had fallen through the ice and she still hadn't regained consciousnes since telling Dawn she loved her. She had gotten a fever the day before and the doctor's were not very hopeful that she would ever wake up. William brushed some stray hair off her forehead and she stirred under his touch, slowly her eyes opened to look into to his concerned ones.

"William." BUffy mumbled. He leaned closer keeping his hand on her forehead.

"HOld on, pet. The doctor's just in the other room. I'll go get him. Just hold on." He kissed her forehead and ran to get the doctor. Buffy smiled and sank back down into the bed.

"Buffy?" Dawn asked cautiously.

"Dawnie..." Buffy replied weakly.

"Buffy! I'm so sorry!" Dawn began to cry again and Buffy weakly took her hand and squeezed it.

"Not your fault..." She mumbled.

"Buffy, if William hadn't jumped in the lake after you, you could have died. I'm sorry.

Just then the doctor came in the door and began to examine Buffy. William stood in the doorway awkwardly and Buffy noticed his dishevelled appearance. As he walked over to Dawn, she noticed that he had a slight limp. The doctor gave her a powder to take and he left the three alone. Dawn had fallen asleep in exhausion and relief on the couch. William covered up with a spare blanket and turned to Buffy again.

"Well, uh. I'll just leave you two alone..."

"William." She called to him weakly. He turned around and walked to her side.

"Yes? Are you ok?" She smiled at him.

"What happened to your leg?" HE looked confused for a second and then realized that she meant his limp.

"Oh well. I think that the skates nicked me a bit." She looked at him a little uncertainly and reached out and took his hand.

"Thank-you." He tilted his head to the side.

"For what?"

"Saving my life silly." she smiled again and looked at him thoughtfully. "Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why did you save me? I mean, you could have been free from the engagement otherwise." He sank back into the chair next to her.

"Couln't live without you." He answered her truthfully and kissed her forehead again. He got up to leave but she didn't release his hand.

"Stay." Buffy mumbled turning over and falling back into a peaceful sleep.

"Whatever you say love." and he fell back into the chair next to her bed and slowly drifted off into a peaceful sleep himself.

******

BUffy awoke the next day feeling feeling much better. She moved on the bed and felt something by her side. Looking down she saw William's head on the bed. He had fallen asleep and slumped over in the chair. She smiled at him. Was he really worried about her? She remembered what he said yesterday...could he really be in love with her? She ran her hands through his hair and he smiled in his sleep.

"Buffy." William murmurred. She looked at him in surprised. No, he was still asleep. Buffy frowned at him, reminding herself what had happened all those years ago and why she couldn't let herself fall in love with him.

Five years ago:

Buffy stood in the entrance waiting for William to arrive. Their parents had already gone to the study discussing business and Dawn was visiting an Aunt this year. She sighed and decided to go and find William. Buffy was thirteen this year and was actually looking forward to seeing her future husband, remembering his blue eyes and good looks. Her stomach fluttered at the thought. Sure, she was still young, but she would be older once they were married...

Wandering through the halls, Buffy began to look at the portraits that were hung on the walls. She stopped in front of a picture of William from when he was eighteen. Smiling innocently at the serious look on his face, she continued on and began to hear noises coming from the room on her left. Buffy approached the door wondering what it was. THe door was slightly open and....

"oh! Oh! William!" She heard a woman moan and there was a grunt in response. BUffy furrowed her brow in confusion.

"Don't stop! William!" the woman shouted. Buffy opened the door a little more and was shocked at the sight in front of her: William- her future husband- with his head buried in the neck of some blonde woman with his pants loose around his waist. Her eyes were closed in ectasy and Buffy could see his hands slide up her bare legs and push her skirt further up as their hips rocked together.

"Ah, yes!" William shouted and sank against her. BUffy felt sick as the woman rubbed her hand through his hair.

"You'd better go. Meet with the child." the woman said.

"Harm. She's just a girl. I'm a man. I have needs."

The tears welled in Buffy's eyes and she felt the bile rise in her throat as he began to caress the other woman's breasts. Buffy turned and ran from the room tears running down her face. She was finally out in the garden and threw-up on the path in front of her. She sat down on the bench and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. William found her out there an hour later. She still looked pale.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked sitting next to her on the bench. BUffy glared at him and shoved him to the ground. She was pretty strong for a 13 year old.

"Like you don't know." she hissed at him and began to walk back into the house. William frowned and got up swiftly grabbing her arm.

"I don't know! I went to look for you in the foyer and you weren't there so I came out here. Are you sick?"

"Like you care! And don't touch me!" Buffy yelled pulling her arm out of his grasp.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you?! I didn't do a sodding thing!" Buffy turned and glared at him.

"I hate you." She whispered with coldness and anger in her eyes. He glared at her.

"What is your bloody problem? Got your first period princess?" William asked smirking and Buffy felt her rage towards him explode. She kicked him in the shin hard and punched him in the face smiling when she saw the blood trickle from his nose.

"Don't talk to me while I'm here." she said and walked stiffly back into the house.

Back to the present:



Now as she gazed at his peaceful sleeping face it was harder to fight those softer feelings that she felt towards him. Buffy ran her hand through his hair again and stroked his cheek. He smiled and his eyes slowly opened.

"Buffy." William sighed and took her hand and pressed it to his mouth giving it a kiss.

"Did you stay here while I was sick?" she asked not taking her hand from his.

"Yeah. YOu were out for two days. I've been here. Dawn too." he answered sitting up and pointing to Dawn who was snoring lightly on the couch.

"Two days? So does that mean that today's Christmas?"

"YEah love." He smiled softly at her and ran his fingers up her arm. "You feeling better is the best present I could have gotten." HE was still smiling at her. Tell her. Tell her. His brain urged. He sighed again and moved his hand to cup her cheek. "Buffy. I don't know when it happened but I just can't live without you. I love you so much. I'd do anything to make you happy." William practically held his breathe waiting for her reply. THe tension was so thick neither noticed that Dawn's snoring had stopped.

Buffy smiled slightly, but her earlier memory rushed down on her and turned her head away with tears in her eyes. She didn't know why this upset her so much. Maybe hearing about something and actually seeing it were two different things.

"I saw you William."

"What do you mean?" he was really confused and hoped that the fever hadn't damaged her brain. She sighed and looked back at him. He was shocked when he noticed the tears.

"When I was thirteen. Five years ago. Do you remember?"

His brow furrowed in concentration. "Was that when you broke my nose?"

"Yeah. I saw you William. With...Harm." Buffy looked at him intently. He still looked confused. "Upsatirs. I went to look for you and I found you in the storage rooms. I. Saw. You."

As he looked at her realization slowly spread across his face. Was that why she had been so upset all those years ago? But she hated him...wait...she only said that after she had seen him...oh.

"Pet.." William said and reached out his hand to take hold of hers again but she pulled away.

"Don't." Buffy said shakily. He sighed and turned her face to his.

"Look. I'm sorry thta you saw that. But that was a really long time ago. We're both older now. I. Love. You." He leaned forward and kissed her on the lips. She could feel all of his passion, his love for her. It was too much. She pulled away.

"I can't. I can't." BUffy mumbled and the tears that she had been fighting began to flow. He moved to pull her in his arms but she weakly pushed him away. "No. No. Please. Go away WIlliam, please."

William sighed and rubbed his face with his hands pulling away. He had hurt her. He never even realized it! THat was why she hated him so much? How would he fix this?

"I can't take it back Buffy. I wish that you never had to see that, but I mean did you think that a man of 21 would be waiting for his 13 year olf bride? I didn't love her if that helps. I love you. I love you so much I can't think straight. I've never loved anyone like this before!" He looked at her seriously, but her head was still turned facing the wall. William stood up and bent down to kiss her temple. "Love you pet."

After he left, Buffy began to sob uncontrollably and put her head in her hands. She felt Dawn snuggle into bed next to her and rub her back.

"Why didn't you tell me Buffy?" Dawn asked.

"I was too embarassed."

The two sisters sat together as Buffy continued to cry her heart out reminding herself that she could never love william back. But another part of her ignored it as she revelled in the fact that he loved her. Dawn rubbed Buffy's shoulder, not exactly sure what to say. Finally Buffy's crying tappered off and they sank back down into the bed.

"Buffy?"

"Yeah Dawnie?"

"Do you love William?"

"I can't Dawn. I just can't"

"Why not?"

"After that...before. I just can't let myself love him. He'll only hurt me again."

"Buffy...He jumped into a freezing lake to save you and didn't even leave your side to bathe. DOn't let the past ruin future together." Dawn fluffed up a pillow and Buffy sighed thinking that Dawn was way too smart to be 13.

"Merry Christmas Dawnie."

"Merry Christmas Buffy."