" I think you should talk to him.might be a reason he lied to you"

" I told you I don't want to talk to him."

Chapter 10: The World

Tsukasa sat in his room quietly, He thought back, memories flooding his head some sad, some happy. He smiled slightly, though he hardly ever acted like it, he was glad he met all of them. Life changed and became better because of them. He all met them there, even her.the one who he had fallen for but rejected him as soon as she realized his gender. He missed her so much.

" Subaru." he sighed sadly remembering the night he had almost made love to her. He lay down on his bed and adjusted his goggles. " I wonder. I could talk to you."

ACCESS DENIED ACCESS DENIED ACCESS DENIED ACCESS DENIED

" WHAT!?" Tsukasa ripped off his goggles and threw them to the floor " BUT HOW!?" He leapt up and threw some pants and a inside out shirt on. " Why can't I get Access The world?"

" Subaru.I hope it wasn't you who did this!" He ran out of the house running as fast as he could to Subaru and Crim's house. He knocked on the door hard and loud until he heard a groan and running down steps. " What is it? Do you know what the time is?" Crim groaned crankily. "huh? Tsukasa? Sorry I was so tired I didn't know it was you, C'mon in" Crim said leaving the door open as he walked. " I'll wake up Subaru." Crim nodded as he left Tsukasa to stand in the hall way. Tsukasa looked around he felt as if there were a giant pit in his stomach. " What to do want..." Subaru said coldly as she and her wheelchair were carried down the steps. " Crim.would it be ok if I brought Subaru to my house and had a talk with her?" Crim nodded in approval. " Crim since when have you been controlling my life!?" Subaru asked angrily. " Since I took you to live here with me instead of that awful hospital that's when." Crim laughed a bit.

" I don't want to go to your house Tsukasa." Subaru said angrily as Tsukasa wheeled her down a few blocks. " So, You need to hear me out, I never thought you to be Selfish Subaru ever."

Tsukasa knealt down and unbuckled her from her wheel chair and lifted her up into his arms He sighed as his chest began to hurt again " this feels like before" he whispered sadly as he sat her down on his bed. He sat down beside her and nervously took her hand. She looked up at him in wonder but also a look of resentment. " Subaru.I'm sorry I lied to you. Its just that..I didn't.I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO!" He hung his head. " Didn't know what else to do? You could have told me you were a boy! The truth that's what you could have done Tsukasa! Who knows what else you could lie about" she huffed. " I'm didn't lie and won't lie about anything else! You don't understand, what it feels like...my life has been so miserable up until now." He sighed again, He could feel the Subaru getting angrier. " I know what its like to have a hard life don't feed me that bullshit what could have possibly happened to you that would be bad enough for you to lie to me!?" She smacked him hard across the face leaving his cheek swollen and pink. He looked at her with shock and slanted his eyes as if he were about to cry. " I'll tell you everything, I can tell you while you're hear Subaru" He took her hand again tears were now forming into his eyes.

" Well, to start...when my mother was pregnant she wanted to have a girl, my dad wanted a boy, well as you can see I was born a boy, but.my mother didn't like that.so she."

" So she what?" Subaru asked pretending not to care.

" So she raised me..as a girl, all my life up until now, I've had to wear dresses, play with dolls, have been forced to read girl's magazines and my mother always tried to have conversations about boys with me."

" How did..your..father...react to all this," Subaru asked covering her hand over her mouth.

" He hated it.so.he yelled at mother, he beat her everyday, and after he was done beating her he would go upstairs and beat me." He sighed coughing a bit

"...." Subaru stared at him with her eyes wide and teary

" One night, when mother was cooking dinner.father took her metal spatula and walked into my room..I was watching a movie when he slammed the door open."

"...Then what..." she looked at the floor choking

Tsukasa stood up and took off his shirt and turned around, Burn marks that turned to scars all over his back and one large scar that looked like a line also went down his back. Subaru gasped as Tsukasa put his shirt back on and sat back down.

" Mother heard me scream and ran up the stairs, Father raped her and killed her while I was there in the same room." " after mother died I was still beaten everyday, and one day I bought " The world" with some money I had saved, that's when I logged in. Dad saw me playing in and became angry, he hit me over the head and I fell into a comma"

" That's why I lied to you.I'm sorry Subaru."

Subaru sat there shocked and in a daze tears rolling down her cheeks

" I'm not sure if I can forgive you yet or if at all..I just hate it that you lied to me..I trusted you.." She looked at him coldly again and allowed him to tuck her into his bed.

" Lets just go to sleep.." Tsukasa said lying next to her feeling deeply hurt.

" I couldn't log into the world today," Tsukasa whispered.

"that was me.I didn't want you looking for me"

" Oh.." Tsukasa said turning around so his back faced her,

* I can't believe all those things happened to him.* Subaru thought as more tears fell down her closed eyes and they both fell asleep.