Disclaimer: Do you think I'd be writing this horrible piece of crap if I
owned RK? NO! I own the plot (if there is one.).
Author's Notes: Rated PG for swearing. If you are having trouble translating the Japanese phrases, I have included the definitions at the bottom. This is an AU fic. For anyone that doesn't know, that stands for Alternate Universe. It means that we are NOT in Feudal Japan, we're in 2003. This fic takes place in America, New York (you'll see), and all the characters except Ayame, Suzume, Yahiko, and Tsubame are younger. What? Do 20-year-olds prank each other? Well, I'll shut up now, on to the story!
He's Two of the Same- Chapter 1- He/She Makes Me Lose My Lunch!
"Kenshin, baka-tomato-atama, go dive off a cliff!" Kaoru Kamiya screamed at her classmate. Both her and Kenshin Himura were fourteen, hated each other, and were voted the school's cutest "couple" by everyone.
"I could say the same for you!"
Kenshin was short, had blood-red hair tied in a low ponytail, and two scars in a cross shape on his left cheek. His eyes were large and violet, and although handsome, Kenshin wasn't liked much by many of his fellow students. Kaoru was short as well, and had long black hair tied up in a dark blue ribbon, with sapphire eyes. Both Kenshin and Kaoru moved with their families from Japan, so they both had taught some phrases to the other students. Before you know it, the whole high school using them.
Now, it was bad enough that both Kenshin and Kaoru went to the same school, and had almost all the same classes. They lived with their families in the same apartment complex, and their rooms were right next to each other. Kenshin and Kaoru had the same ventilation system, so it was, unfortunately, easy to communicate. Yep, they insulted and annoyed each other 'till the cows came home using that thing. Not to mention, their parents were best friends, and Kaoru's little brother Yahiko was head-over- heels in love with Kenshin's little sister, Tsubame.
Now, back to the present.
"That's the best comeback you can think of, baka-tomato-atama?"
"No, shut up, I don't want to fight all through lunch! Ever heard of eating?"
"Don't start shouting matches if you don't want to compete, tomato-futa!"
Kaoru bellowed her final insult, and left Kenshin to his lunch. Ever-so- popular Sanosuke Sagara, captain of the soccer and basketball teams, walked up to his best friend, who was eating like the world would end.
"Kamiya's a weird one. She may have a thing for you, always calling you something to do with a tomato because of your damn hair-color. Whoa, buddy, don't choke yourself with your appetite!"
"So does that mean Megumi has a thing for you because she always calls you tori-atama? I think you see my point. By any chance, did you eat your tapioca yet, Sano?" Kenshin asked with a smirk.
"Hell, no! I am not going out from cafeteria food poisoning! I swear, the boy's bathroom is haunted by little Jimmy III, who died from the cafeteria pudding ten years ago! Wait, you don't wanna eat it, do ya? Cuz you know that I will have cause you bodily harm if you put any of that crap in your mouth!"
"I'm not a psychopath, Sano. It will look nice on Kamiya's head though, don't you think?"
Sanosuke finally caught on to Kenshin's scheme, and plastered on a smirk of his own.
"Uhhhhh, Sano?"
"Yeah, buddy?"
"There are three signs on your back; they say "Kick me hard", "My name is Seamore Butts", and "Butt nugget"."
"Figures..."
------
"I swear, not even Aoshi-kun is any decent!" yelled Misao Makimachi, joining her best friend Kaoru at a lunch table. Kaoru opened her lunch bag, and pulled out a sandwich, water bottle, and a small bag of potato chips from it.
"Boys. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em." Kaoru sighed.
'I must admit, Kenshin does look kinda cute.' she thought, turning a little red-cheeked. Misao instantly noticed the change in her friend's pigmentation, and smothered a giggle.
While Kaoru was off in La-La Land, she didn't fail to mutter extremely low in volume that sounded like, "Kenshin is pretty cute."
Misao's giggle turned into a full-blown laugh. This snapped Kaoru out of her daze.
"Huh? Whazzo funny, Misao?"
"You.hahaha.Ken.haha.shin.CUTE!" Misao managed to stutter out. She was laughing uncontrollably. Kaoru fit the pieces of words together, and paled immensely. She picked up her water bottle, and squirted Misao in the side as a warning signal.
"Not-another-word. Unless you want me to tell my brother about your puppy- love affection to him." Kaoru snarled. Misao saw the deathly look in her friend's eyes, and took the hint with gratitude. She quickly changed the subject.
"So, did you get an IM account yet?"
"No, Misao-chan. I can't get the stupid thing to work!"
"I could show ya after school, after all, TGIF!"
Kaoru's smile grew like a weed. She quickly nodded yes, and walked to her next class.
OWARI (for now)
Do you like it? Please review, I'll take anything, good or bad. I am very aware these characters are OOC; they only act like that in front of each other. In other words, Kenshin won't be mean to his younger sisters, only to Kaoru and the other girls. The chapters will get longer, I swear, this was more of a Prologue. And for some people who MIGHT remember, I had this posted as my first fanfiction but accidentally deleted it, then lost it in my other computer files (I accidentally put it in my music files, doh!). I re-found it, and decided to write all of it before I posted chapter one. This isn't a long fic at all, in fact, I should only have to update for five days (one each day in the afternoon).
Translations:
baka-tomato-atama: stupid tomato brain (tomato in Japanese is the same as in the English language)
tomato-futa: tomato-top
tori-atama: bird brain
-kun: used for younger people or colleagues
-chan: 1:a term used for people younger that 15. 2:a term of endearment (used between close friends also)
owari: end
Author's Notes: Rated PG for swearing. If you are having trouble translating the Japanese phrases, I have included the definitions at the bottom. This is an AU fic. For anyone that doesn't know, that stands for Alternate Universe. It means that we are NOT in Feudal Japan, we're in 2003. This fic takes place in America, New York (you'll see), and all the characters except Ayame, Suzume, Yahiko, and Tsubame are younger. What? Do 20-year-olds prank each other? Well, I'll shut up now, on to the story!
He's Two of the Same- Chapter 1- He/She Makes Me Lose My Lunch!
"Kenshin, baka-tomato-atama, go dive off a cliff!" Kaoru Kamiya screamed at her classmate. Both her and Kenshin Himura were fourteen, hated each other, and were voted the school's cutest "couple" by everyone.
"I could say the same for you!"
Kenshin was short, had blood-red hair tied in a low ponytail, and two scars in a cross shape on his left cheek. His eyes were large and violet, and although handsome, Kenshin wasn't liked much by many of his fellow students. Kaoru was short as well, and had long black hair tied up in a dark blue ribbon, with sapphire eyes. Both Kenshin and Kaoru moved with their families from Japan, so they both had taught some phrases to the other students. Before you know it, the whole high school using them.
Now, it was bad enough that both Kenshin and Kaoru went to the same school, and had almost all the same classes. They lived with their families in the same apartment complex, and their rooms were right next to each other. Kenshin and Kaoru had the same ventilation system, so it was, unfortunately, easy to communicate. Yep, they insulted and annoyed each other 'till the cows came home using that thing. Not to mention, their parents were best friends, and Kaoru's little brother Yahiko was head-over- heels in love with Kenshin's little sister, Tsubame.
Now, back to the present.
"That's the best comeback you can think of, baka-tomato-atama?"
"No, shut up, I don't want to fight all through lunch! Ever heard of eating?"
"Don't start shouting matches if you don't want to compete, tomato-futa!"
Kaoru bellowed her final insult, and left Kenshin to his lunch. Ever-so- popular Sanosuke Sagara, captain of the soccer and basketball teams, walked up to his best friend, who was eating like the world would end.
"Kamiya's a weird one. She may have a thing for you, always calling you something to do with a tomato because of your damn hair-color. Whoa, buddy, don't choke yourself with your appetite!"
"So does that mean Megumi has a thing for you because she always calls you tori-atama? I think you see my point. By any chance, did you eat your tapioca yet, Sano?" Kenshin asked with a smirk.
"Hell, no! I am not going out from cafeteria food poisoning! I swear, the boy's bathroom is haunted by little Jimmy III, who died from the cafeteria pudding ten years ago! Wait, you don't wanna eat it, do ya? Cuz you know that I will have cause you bodily harm if you put any of that crap in your mouth!"
"I'm not a psychopath, Sano. It will look nice on Kamiya's head though, don't you think?"
Sanosuke finally caught on to Kenshin's scheme, and plastered on a smirk of his own.
"Uhhhhh, Sano?"
"Yeah, buddy?"
"There are three signs on your back; they say "Kick me hard", "My name is Seamore Butts", and "Butt nugget"."
"Figures..."
------
"I swear, not even Aoshi-kun is any decent!" yelled Misao Makimachi, joining her best friend Kaoru at a lunch table. Kaoru opened her lunch bag, and pulled out a sandwich, water bottle, and a small bag of potato chips from it.
"Boys. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em." Kaoru sighed.
'I must admit, Kenshin does look kinda cute.' she thought, turning a little red-cheeked. Misao instantly noticed the change in her friend's pigmentation, and smothered a giggle.
While Kaoru was off in La-La Land, she didn't fail to mutter extremely low in volume that sounded like, "Kenshin is pretty cute."
Misao's giggle turned into a full-blown laugh. This snapped Kaoru out of her daze.
"Huh? Whazzo funny, Misao?"
"You.hahaha.Ken.haha.shin.CUTE!" Misao managed to stutter out. She was laughing uncontrollably. Kaoru fit the pieces of words together, and paled immensely. She picked up her water bottle, and squirted Misao in the side as a warning signal.
"Not-another-word. Unless you want me to tell my brother about your puppy- love affection to him." Kaoru snarled. Misao saw the deathly look in her friend's eyes, and took the hint with gratitude. She quickly changed the subject.
"So, did you get an IM account yet?"
"No, Misao-chan. I can't get the stupid thing to work!"
"I could show ya after school, after all, TGIF!"
Kaoru's smile grew like a weed. She quickly nodded yes, and walked to her next class.
OWARI (for now)
Do you like it? Please review, I'll take anything, good or bad. I am very aware these characters are OOC; they only act like that in front of each other. In other words, Kenshin won't be mean to his younger sisters, only to Kaoru and the other girls. The chapters will get longer, I swear, this was more of a Prologue. And for some people who MIGHT remember, I had this posted as my first fanfiction but accidentally deleted it, then lost it in my other computer files (I accidentally put it in my music files, doh!). I re-found it, and decided to write all of it before I posted chapter one. This isn't a long fic at all, in fact, I should only have to update for five days (one each day in the afternoon).
Translations:
baka-tomato-atama: stupid tomato brain (tomato in Japanese is the same as in the English language)
tomato-futa: tomato-top
tori-atama: bird brain
-kun: used for younger people or colleagues
-chan: 1:a term used for people younger that 15. 2:a term of endearment (used between close friends also)
owari: end
