A/N: Hey all you people out there! I'd like to say: (ahem) Thank you, you wonderful reviewers, you! CrazyAmy, Lady Rebecca, Dark Elf, and Superhero for Hire, I love and appreciate your comments very much! Little by little things are starting to move along, so the encouragement, and criticism as well, help me while I sit here at my computer, trying to make up this plot as I go along. So far, I'm not frightened yet, haha, which I suppose is a good thing! Anyway, I'll cease my babbling now and let you read chapter three. And, as always, tell me what you think! Thanks so much!~~
Disclaimer: Yes, I just purchased Harry, Ron, and Hermione. I'm working on Sirius. Haha. No, of course I do not own the Harry Potter characters, and if you think I do, well, that's poor judgment on your part, mate.
Chapter Three
Lily rubbed her sore elbow, walking out of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, and smiled consolingly at Laura.
"Just practice a bit, that's all. I'll help you, and you'll be good at this stuff in no time."
Class hadn't been exceptionally challenging the first day back; only reviewing the basics and doing some practice. Lily had teamed up with Laura in hopes of building her confidence, only to find that it might have been less painful if she hadn't. After several cries of "Impedimenta" Lily had accumulated several bruises, but Laura at least seemed to get the hang of that.
"Or," Lily said, "talk to Remus. I'm sure he'd practice with you."
Laura's cheeks turned scarlet, and she fiddled with her wand, "No, er, that's ok."
Lily raised her eyebrows, "Oh. Well, alright then."
Sirius walked behind Lily, and reached out a hand to tug on her hair. "Hey Lily, planning on ignoring me for the rest of the year?"
"Only when you're acting like an idiot."
"When do I ever do that?" Sirius laughed, winking at Laura.
Laura giggled, "Don't ask questions like that, Sirius, she'll give you a full account."
"Ah, well, we've got to have fun sometimes," he teased, a grin on his face, "Right, Lils?"
Lily was about to comment when Sirius spotted Snape ahead of them, and gave them a big smile, "Duty calls."
He pulled out his wand, aiming at Snape, but stopped when Lily grabbed his wrist.
"Sirius, don't. Let him be." Her voice was heavy with exasperation, and the look in her eyes was hard to ignore.
"Lily," he sighed, clearly agitated, " but-" He pocketed his wand, "Ok, fine. But why the hell do you stand up for him?"
"It's cruel, even if it is Severus."
Sirius let out a groan of frustration, "You just cost me some really happy memories."
~~**~~
James sank into the couch, the fire casting a glow on his face. Remus and Peter were playing wizards chess, and Peter was obviously losing judging by the sound of it. Every now and then, he'd let out a muffled sound of annoyance. James ran a hand through his messy hair and glanced at the work he hadn't even started yet. His quill and unused parchment lay sprawled on the floor at his feet. He glanced at Lily, reading with her legs drawn up in a chair, and let out a breath ,"Now or never", he thought, rising to his feet. She looked up at him as he did so, watching him.
"Can I talk to you for a moment?" Good, good, at least he didn't sound nervous.
Her eyes scanned his, "James, I'm-"
"Lily, please. I'm not asking you to go frolicking in the forest with me, I just need a moment. That's it."
She set her book down, sighing, and stood up. "Alright."
Remus glanced up from the chessboard at James and gave him a slight smile, before saying discreetly to Peter, "This could be interesting."
Standing in the shadows of the staircase that led to her dorm, Lily leaned against the cool stone wall, watching James. Her heart leapt to her throat, surprising her greatly, and she looked away.
"James, say whatever it is you have to say, I don't really want to stand here with you all night." Liar, a voice from somewhere inside her said, who are you trying to fool? Leave me alone, she thought, just leave.
James looked slightly crestfallen, pain flashing in his eyes, but then it was gone.
"Sometimes I wonder why it is that you still can't stand to be around me," he said.
Lily's gaze traveled back up to his; she regarded him silently, her face partially shrouded by the shadows.
" I can't undo the past, Lily!"
At this she stood taller, lifting her chin defiantly, " And I'm not asking you to."
"Then what do you want me to do, then? I don't know what to say to you, Lily. I can't keep apologizing for myself when you won't even look at me!"
He raised his voice slightly, after she'd managed to tear her eyes away from his, and took a step closer to her.
"At least tell me why you didn't write back? Don't you think I deserve an explanation?"
Lily stared up into his face, unable to think; she felt as if she couldn't even form the words to speak.
"I told you-" she began, but he cut her off.
"You were busy, I know. Forget it, Evans. I understand." He frowned, turning to go down the stairs.
"Oh, come off it James, you have no clue. Don't stand there and tell me you understand anything!" Her emerald eyes were blazing furiously in the darkness. When he turned once more to face her, they stood almost nose to nose, him a step lower on the staircase than she.
"Well how can I? You're too…damn…stubborn to let anyone even try!" He threw his arms up in the air in frustration and descended the stairs in a rage, entering the common room and glaring at Remus and Peter, who were both watching intently.
"What are you looking at?!" He burst, and headed for the boys' dormitory before they had a chance to react.
~~**~~
"Care to tell me why you're sulking?" Laura plopped down at the foot of Lily's bed, giving her the "I-know-something's-wrong-and-you're-not-telling" stare.
"Actually no, I don't," Lily snapped, "so if you don't mind, I have homework to do."
Laura reached out and grabbed the quill from her hand, splattering ink on the formerly tidy essay.
"What are you doing! That-"
"That was a wake up call, Lil. You've been in the throes of melancholy since you got here."
Lily snatched at her quill, but Laura kept it out of her reach. "I've got a little more to think about than some," she said callously.
"But yet you refuse to talk about it. You are going to drive yourself crazy, Lily, and I'm not going to feel sorry for you. You go moping about each day like it's your last on Earth and pretty soon, no one is going to want to be within ten feet of you!"
"Well, maybe that's for the best, now give me my quill and leave me alone."
"No. Not this time. That's exactly your problem. Everyone's been "leaving you alone" for too long! You should hear yourself! I know you're afraid, I know it's been hard, but for God's sake, stop pushing people away!"
"Go away, Laura," Lily said calmly, anger only evident in her cold stare.
Laura looked slightly hurt, "Alright then. I'm sure you'll handle it on your own. Being alone is what you're best at, isn't it?" She slid off Lily's bed and walked to the door, pausing. "How long before you figure out that you can't escape everything you don't want to face, Lily?" Without waiting for a response she left the room, closing the door with a large bang.
Lily felt the slam of the door ring in her ears, sitting motionless for a few minutes. After trying futilely to work on her essay she let out a long breath and slumped back against her pillows. Pushing people away, she thought, well what good would it do to have them around? Her eyes stung but she blinked furiously and crawled to the foot of her bed, leaning down to open her trunk. She dug through the contents, finally clutching onto a worn, leather bound journal and lifting it out gently. Settling back against the pillows, she listened for the sounds of any approaching footsteps, and satisfied that there were none, she carefully opened the cover, removing a well-read and creased letter, already aged from repeated viewings. Another lay within the pages of her journal, James', but she left it tucked away. Opening her fathers letter and feeling tears well in her eyes again she read.
Dear Lily,
I know it has been ages since I last wrote, but I know you understand how hard it can be. I cannot say a great deal, but know that I send all of my love. It may be some time before I can write again, we'll just have to see. Until then, take care and try to stay out of too much trouble.
With all my love,
Dad
Lily felt a tear trickle down her cheek and brushed it away angrily with the back of her hand. It had been almost a month, but it felt like forever since she'd gotten that note. He could be anywhere. Never once did his letters give the slightest clue as to where he was, which of course was only a safety precaution, but Lily felt she would rest easier if she at least knew her father's whereabouts. Stuck in Hogwarts, she couldn't do a thing . As soon as the year came to an end, she planned to march straight to the ministry and tell them to give her a position. She'd make residence in their lobby if she had to. Hearing another report of killings or disappearances would drive her over the edge. Yet nothing seemed to be getting done. What were those idiots doing? Playing throw a dart at the map and making that the search area? Lily let out a cry of frustration and shut the journal. This could not go on forever.
~~**~~
Disclaimer: Yes, I just purchased Harry, Ron, and Hermione. I'm working on Sirius. Haha. No, of course I do not own the Harry Potter characters, and if you think I do, well, that's poor judgment on your part, mate.
Chapter Three
Lily rubbed her sore elbow, walking out of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, and smiled consolingly at Laura.
"Just practice a bit, that's all. I'll help you, and you'll be good at this stuff in no time."
Class hadn't been exceptionally challenging the first day back; only reviewing the basics and doing some practice. Lily had teamed up with Laura in hopes of building her confidence, only to find that it might have been less painful if she hadn't. After several cries of "Impedimenta" Lily had accumulated several bruises, but Laura at least seemed to get the hang of that.
"Or," Lily said, "talk to Remus. I'm sure he'd practice with you."
Laura's cheeks turned scarlet, and she fiddled with her wand, "No, er, that's ok."
Lily raised her eyebrows, "Oh. Well, alright then."
Sirius walked behind Lily, and reached out a hand to tug on her hair. "Hey Lily, planning on ignoring me for the rest of the year?"
"Only when you're acting like an idiot."
"When do I ever do that?" Sirius laughed, winking at Laura.
Laura giggled, "Don't ask questions like that, Sirius, she'll give you a full account."
"Ah, well, we've got to have fun sometimes," he teased, a grin on his face, "Right, Lils?"
Lily was about to comment when Sirius spotted Snape ahead of them, and gave them a big smile, "Duty calls."
He pulled out his wand, aiming at Snape, but stopped when Lily grabbed his wrist.
"Sirius, don't. Let him be." Her voice was heavy with exasperation, and the look in her eyes was hard to ignore.
"Lily," he sighed, clearly agitated, " but-" He pocketed his wand, "Ok, fine. But why the hell do you stand up for him?"
"It's cruel, even if it is Severus."
Sirius let out a groan of frustration, "You just cost me some really happy memories."
~~**~~
James sank into the couch, the fire casting a glow on his face. Remus and Peter were playing wizards chess, and Peter was obviously losing judging by the sound of it. Every now and then, he'd let out a muffled sound of annoyance. James ran a hand through his messy hair and glanced at the work he hadn't even started yet. His quill and unused parchment lay sprawled on the floor at his feet. He glanced at Lily, reading with her legs drawn up in a chair, and let out a breath ,"Now or never", he thought, rising to his feet. She looked up at him as he did so, watching him.
"Can I talk to you for a moment?" Good, good, at least he didn't sound nervous.
Her eyes scanned his, "James, I'm-"
"Lily, please. I'm not asking you to go frolicking in the forest with me, I just need a moment. That's it."
She set her book down, sighing, and stood up. "Alright."
Remus glanced up from the chessboard at James and gave him a slight smile, before saying discreetly to Peter, "This could be interesting."
Standing in the shadows of the staircase that led to her dorm, Lily leaned against the cool stone wall, watching James. Her heart leapt to her throat, surprising her greatly, and she looked away.
"James, say whatever it is you have to say, I don't really want to stand here with you all night." Liar, a voice from somewhere inside her said, who are you trying to fool? Leave me alone, she thought, just leave.
James looked slightly crestfallen, pain flashing in his eyes, but then it was gone.
"Sometimes I wonder why it is that you still can't stand to be around me," he said.
Lily's gaze traveled back up to his; she regarded him silently, her face partially shrouded by the shadows.
" I can't undo the past, Lily!"
At this she stood taller, lifting her chin defiantly, " And I'm not asking you to."
"Then what do you want me to do, then? I don't know what to say to you, Lily. I can't keep apologizing for myself when you won't even look at me!"
He raised his voice slightly, after she'd managed to tear her eyes away from his, and took a step closer to her.
"At least tell me why you didn't write back? Don't you think I deserve an explanation?"
Lily stared up into his face, unable to think; she felt as if she couldn't even form the words to speak.
"I told you-" she began, but he cut her off.
"You were busy, I know. Forget it, Evans. I understand." He frowned, turning to go down the stairs.
"Oh, come off it James, you have no clue. Don't stand there and tell me you understand anything!" Her emerald eyes were blazing furiously in the darkness. When he turned once more to face her, they stood almost nose to nose, him a step lower on the staircase than she.
"Well how can I? You're too…damn…stubborn to let anyone even try!" He threw his arms up in the air in frustration and descended the stairs in a rage, entering the common room and glaring at Remus and Peter, who were both watching intently.
"What are you looking at?!" He burst, and headed for the boys' dormitory before they had a chance to react.
~~**~~
"Care to tell me why you're sulking?" Laura plopped down at the foot of Lily's bed, giving her the "I-know-something's-wrong-and-you're-not-telling" stare.
"Actually no, I don't," Lily snapped, "so if you don't mind, I have homework to do."
Laura reached out and grabbed the quill from her hand, splattering ink on the formerly tidy essay.
"What are you doing! That-"
"That was a wake up call, Lil. You've been in the throes of melancholy since you got here."
Lily snatched at her quill, but Laura kept it out of her reach. "I've got a little more to think about than some," she said callously.
"But yet you refuse to talk about it. You are going to drive yourself crazy, Lily, and I'm not going to feel sorry for you. You go moping about each day like it's your last on Earth and pretty soon, no one is going to want to be within ten feet of you!"
"Well, maybe that's for the best, now give me my quill and leave me alone."
"No. Not this time. That's exactly your problem. Everyone's been "leaving you alone" for too long! You should hear yourself! I know you're afraid, I know it's been hard, but for God's sake, stop pushing people away!"
"Go away, Laura," Lily said calmly, anger only evident in her cold stare.
Laura looked slightly hurt, "Alright then. I'm sure you'll handle it on your own. Being alone is what you're best at, isn't it?" She slid off Lily's bed and walked to the door, pausing. "How long before you figure out that you can't escape everything you don't want to face, Lily?" Without waiting for a response she left the room, closing the door with a large bang.
Lily felt the slam of the door ring in her ears, sitting motionless for a few minutes. After trying futilely to work on her essay she let out a long breath and slumped back against her pillows. Pushing people away, she thought, well what good would it do to have them around? Her eyes stung but she blinked furiously and crawled to the foot of her bed, leaning down to open her trunk. She dug through the contents, finally clutching onto a worn, leather bound journal and lifting it out gently. Settling back against the pillows, she listened for the sounds of any approaching footsteps, and satisfied that there were none, she carefully opened the cover, removing a well-read and creased letter, already aged from repeated viewings. Another lay within the pages of her journal, James', but she left it tucked away. Opening her fathers letter and feeling tears well in her eyes again she read.
Dear Lily,
I know it has been ages since I last wrote, but I know you understand how hard it can be. I cannot say a great deal, but know that I send all of my love. It may be some time before I can write again, we'll just have to see. Until then, take care and try to stay out of too much trouble.
With all my love,
Dad
Lily felt a tear trickle down her cheek and brushed it away angrily with the back of her hand. It had been almost a month, but it felt like forever since she'd gotten that note. He could be anywhere. Never once did his letters give the slightest clue as to where he was, which of course was only a safety precaution, but Lily felt she would rest easier if she at least knew her father's whereabouts. Stuck in Hogwarts, she couldn't do a thing . As soon as the year came to an end, she planned to march straight to the ministry and tell them to give her a position. She'd make residence in their lobby if she had to. Hearing another report of killings or disappearances would drive her over the edge. Yet nothing seemed to be getting done. What were those idiots doing? Playing throw a dart at the map and making that the search area? Lily let out a cry of frustration and shut the journal. This could not go on forever.
~~**~~
