Voices in the Dark
Author: The Dragoness
Notes: Sorry... this took a bit longer than I expected…. Again. Seriously though, when I finally went back to ff.net after it started working again, I saw all the comments you guys left me, sat down, and basically wrote all of this. ^_^ See! Comments work! Eh, lots and lots of psychology/dialogue in this one… I basically explain Devi's entire personality at one point (*snort*), and for those who just want to hit me over the head and say "cut to the chase," let me tell you, it takes a TON of explanation for a lot of this stuff. But fear not, for you get the first bit of actual good-old-fashioned action as well, and now that all the explaining out of the way, expect a bunch of action from all 3 characters in the next chapters. Enjoy!
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Chapter Four
Revelation
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Hello, Devi. I am Chaos. Would you care to know who is more powerful than I am?
Its heads grinned.
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At Devi's stunned silence, Chaos continued. "I see you don't. Allow me to introduce myself then, mortal. I am often referred to as 'the sum of all anger, confusion, disorder, and madness in the world,' and sometimes called 'both the cause and effect of the living grime you see.' But those clinical definitions are so demeaning I usually destroy anyone I come across who uses them. Instead, you may think of me as an immortal being from before the dawn of your petty species: Chaos."
Devi merely returned a closed expression in reply, and Chaos became slightly perturbed that the idiotic girl didn't seem to register any awe or amazement. Perhaps this whole "mortal" thing wasn't worth it after all. A façade of primeval emotions of "hunt, feed, and destroy" were much more suiting for a powerful entity instead of this lowering down to a human's level to deal with these "feelings" and "emotions." After all, when it came down to it, mortals were much less powerful and infinitely more pathetic than Voices or Parasites. But Chaos had decided what it wanted: a human to play with. Specifically one of three particular humans for the pure and simple reasons that the Voices had wanted them. And Chaos by now was long used to getting what it desired.
"I come bearing an elite gift, Devi," Chaos said, slipping further into the human pattern of speech and logic. "Plain and simple, I offer the chance for you to slip away from your petty life and join my ranks of power."
The full force of what had just occurred in the past ten minutes suddenly came crashing down on Devi as she tried to grasp her mind around it. "What?!" she all but spat, finally finding her voice in a fury of anger and confusion. "You come into my apartment, trash my room, scare the hell out of me, and then expect me to just go along with you?! Someone's already tried that once before, and it didn't work. You expect me join the source of the scum and stupidity I've been trying to avoid all of my life! Look, you seem to have a lot of heads… I'd think you'd know how to use at least one of them."
She flinched as the previously mentioned heads snarled simultaneously, darting toward her for a split second and then retreating as an afterthought. Perhaps insulting an immortal wasn't the best idea in the book.
"You don't seem to understand,"
Chaos droned, its voice slow and patiently strained. "The only reason I am actually going to explain it to you is to
get what I want, so don't even think your opinions hold any importance. You claim that you hate your species for
their stupidity and worthless obsessions with the idiotic?"
"Obviously. Which is exactly what you embody, if I infer
correctly."
"Yes and no. I am the embodiment of their emotions and instincts, not the people themselves. So you value none of these petty creatures then?"
"Most of them have hurt me, and I can't think of anyone worth mentioning for the better. Take a wild guess."
Chaos flicked its central head to one side. "What about this "Tenna" creature?"
"Her too. She doesn't try to hurt me; she's just so stupidly oblivious it's painful."
The monster cracked a few joints and rolled its central head in a way Devi didn't like at all. "True as that may be-" It paused for a moment more as though preoccupied, and Devi's uneasiness steadily climbed higher. "-you are, as usual, forgetting to take several very important facts into account…"
Chaos suddenly grew silent as four of its heads snapped up to stare at the battered door to Devi's apartment. Devi however, refused to break her concentration on the thing, lest it be a trick the monster might be playing. That is until-
"Hey, Devi! What have you done to your door? You know, if you're resorting to violent tendencies, you really should get out more." The sound of the doorknob rattling. "Oh, be quiet, Spooky. It's just Devi's appartment. It's weird, but there's nothing bad in there; you know that. Devi!!! I'm coming in!"
Instantly Devi whipped her head around, catching a mouthful of purple hair in the process. "Tenna!" she yelled at the door, half surprising herself with the force she used. "Don't come in here!" She blinked in horror as she watched the bottom lip of the door slowly move along the wooden floor, gathering a small pile of dust and debris as it moved. "Do you hear me? Do not come in here!"
"No way... I'm not - Spooky, stop it - letting you stay in that dark old room by yourself!"
"Tenna, you fucking idiot, get OUT!"
The door continued to move. "Resorting to name-calling, are you now?"
Out of the corner of her eye, Devi saw Chaos's central head slip into a wide grin, and she felt her teeth clamp down even tighter. "Tenna-"
"Nope, too late!" The door finally swung completely open to reveal her neighbor, her black hair pushed back with a green headband, and her eyes squeezed shut as she grinned. With a small movement she held out a brown paper bag at arm's length in front of her. "I brought rame-"
With a high-pitched shriek, Chaos lashed out several of its bony arms and tentacles. Tenna only had time for one look of utter horror before she was gripped tightly around the waist, hurled upwards, and slammed into the opposite wall. A cloud of dust billowed out through the room, and even more plaster managed to rain down from the already demolished ceiling. Devi felt herself thrown back from the force of the impact to land roughly on the floor. Her purse fell and skidded along the length of the room. A moment later it hit the opposite wall, spilling a brush brushes, a box of tic tacs, and Sickness onto the floor.
Coughing slightly, Devi raised herself up on one elbow and felt her eyes open wide as she watched one claw-tipped arm drag an unmoving Tenna along the dust into the center of the room. Unconscious? Hurt? Dead? Devi felt hysteria... no... anger bubble over within her.
Now that's more like it.
"You fucking bastard!!!" She screamed, standing up and half-posed to attack the thing in front of her, eyes glowing with rage.
You see? Anger and emotions are an integral part of you. Look at the force of your reaction.
"Of course! Look at what you've done to her!"
Chaos's claws dug into Tenna's shirt, and it slowly flipped her onto her back, her head lolling to one side. Precisely. But you said you hated this thing. She annoyed you. You only used her company as a last resort. The claw flipped back a stray black lock that had fallen over her face. And yet you react in such a violent way. Do you know why?
She merely narrowed her eyes in response, but that horribly annoying voice in the back of her head was working overtime, despite her best efforts to suppress the thing. God, it was true, wasn't it? She had treated Tenna like that. But... Tenna knew better, right? She didn't only see that part of her. Tenna knew that she wasn't so self-concerned and closed off all the time... right? Lost in her own thoughts, Devi shook her head numbly.
Because you are connected to this person. Because you are social, thinking creatures, you are connected to every other member of your species that you ever meet. You react to their words and actions, and thus you are affected by them. You even model your mode of life off of them. The jerk outside the grocery store. Your landlady who yells at you every Sunday to pay your rent. Your father. Your boyfriends. Your murderer. Every single time you chance across one, you will take the time to form a picture of them in your mind. And thus, in your very head, they become a part of you. You are affected by the memory you have created, no matter how much you try to isolate yourself.
But you have a flaw Devi. A very serious one, if we exclude the previous insane self-exile from the world and your temporary expedition into the land of "normal." You- its heads leered- do not recognize the value of these very important relationships. You do not want to involve yourself too deeply because the people you meet are not perfect. You don't want to get hurt. So you attempt to refuse any and all meaningful ties to others. It takes the thought that this girl is dead to make you realize that she is your only friend in the world
How... psychotic.
Staring at Tenna's unmoving body, Devi wrapped her arms around each other, clutching her sleeves with her nails. "So that's it then?" She muttered, disgust tinting her words. I'm a horrible person. I'm just as fucking psycho as all those jerks who did this to me."
On the ground levels, yes. Living among the millions of worthless, pathetic soles, it is a flaw. Since you are connected to other humans, you are connected to the anger, hate, and chaos within them. You feel yourself affected by it every day. Whether you hate it or like it is your business, but there is no escaping it. Not until the day you die, and depending on where you go, sometimes not even then. However… it grinned again. Through your strength and your capacity to learn, I am willing to take you directly under my control, to work as our only human among our Paracites. You will be above the filthy creatures you despise, who have hurt you. You will not be a part of them. You will only watch. And control them.
There is only one relationship among the elite. Master and minion.
Still holding her arms, Devi watched Tenna without looking up at Chaos once during its speech. Its enlightenment. So much different than Sickness's last-ditch effort to offer her power. The offering was an existence without ties. It made so much sense... it explained everything about her screwed-up ideals that she refused to tell anyone, or even admit to herself. Perhaps that was why she was so susceptible to it… after all these years something at last understood her, was on her level. Earlier she would have agreed. At age eighteen. Seven years prior. Fifteen minutes ago. But now... Now she couldn't tear her eyes from Tenna, even to watch an immortal monster that had ripped a hole into her living room.
Tenna was her friend, wasn't she?
What do friends do?
Worry about and help each other.
Even if one annoys the other?
There are many different types of people. Don't judge so harshly.
Then what about the jerks I meet?
That is the picture of them in my own mind. They have names and personalities too.
It's because I don't want to become involved that I don't try to see them as anything but that.
But what if they really are jerks? Then I don't have to feel obligated to them? To think about how much I hate them?
To ruin my potential for relationships with other people?
Because don't want to become involved with those "jerks," I refuse to allow myself to get close to people who could provide company for me.
That's not right. Then I'm allowing them to control my life.
They may affect me in some small way, but I don't have to become so involved in it.
I don't have to let people I don't want to be involved with affect by thinking to the point where I don't want contact with anyone remotely not "normal," do I?
I can choose who and what affects my own life.
I am in charge of myself.
I am in charge of myself.
"I am in charge of myself!" She yelled, pointing at Chaos's central head with one outstretched finger, cracks and flakes visible in what was once purple nail polish. "You may have created all this filth in people, and I may be connected to the whole stinking lot of it, but I don't need some monster or voices in my head to rise above it! I can do it my own way! I can think for myself, damn you!
"And if you don't like it," She tilted her head to the left and gritted her teeth. "Then you can get the hell out of my living room."
A ringing silence echoed through the room for a few moments, ricocheting around Devi as she stood triumphantly in the midst of it, her head held high and eyes flashing as though she'd just delivered the most important statement in her life. If this was the end of her, then damn if she would go down without a fight. She had a life to design.
Master! Sickness wailed from the floor. The bitch only wishes to spite you! She's too stupid to ever join us; I know it. Just kill her now! Rip her to shreds! Use her body to-
Without turning, Chaos's arm slammed down roughly on the doll's tiny, blind head, slowly tightening its clawed grip until her seems burst and teeth splintered. Then with a subtle flick of its bony wrist, it sent what remained of the Parasite sailing across the room. That's better. But Sickness was right you know. I can see from your mind that you are too stupid to join us willingly, and sadly you are too strong-willed and stubborn to be much use if we use your mind forcibly. Oh, it would be easy of course... don't think that you're that powerful at all; Parasites could do it with enough time... it's just that I honestly don't feel like being troubled about it. You understand.
Devi snorted. "Of course. Everyone hates hassles. Even disgusting monsters like yourself."
Chaos growled and chose to ignore that last comment. Strength had been her appeal in the first place, hadn't it? Besides, she'd get what was coming to her. Exactly. So I'm afraid I'll just have to use your soul as some nourishment instead. Goodbye, Devi. You should feel honored that a being so powerful took notice of you before your death. It thought for a moment. Which reminds me... Sickness? Would you mind telling our guest once again who in this world is more powerful than Chaos?
Silence issued from the scraps of stuffing and metal.
Thank you.
Without so much as a moment's pause, something Devi had always thought a common courtesy of villains everywhere, Chaos lunged at her. Or more precisely, one of its arms did. As she threw herself flat on the floor, it shot over her head, slicing through the ends of her hair as she fell, and slamming the sofa into the opposite wall.
"Got to focus," she muttered to herself, noticing the strands tangled between the thing's claws as the large spikes ripped through the fabric on her couch. Jumping to her feet again, she began to prepare for the next inevitable attack when she heard yet another pounding on her door. She chose to ignore it, and the pounding quickly turned into solitary thumps, growing louder and more violent until finally the entire frame shook with each impact.
Wondering what could be next, she watched as what remained of her battered door fell into the room with a loud "whump," followed by a figure moving very, very quickly to close the distance between them. She squinted through the dust. Tall, thin, spiky hair-
Her eyes widened in shock. "You!"
Panting slightly, Nny rested his hands on his knees, taking in long gulps of air as through he'd just sprinted through half the city. "Yes... me. Look, Devi, I know what you're thinking-"
"What the HELL are you doing in my apartment?! You are the last person I want to see right now. I'm a little busy in case you couldn't tell!"
"I... know... I came to... help."
She was half-tempted to tell him to go screw himself, that she didn't need any help, and that he could just wait outside until she was done so that she could kick his ass again... but... her eyes wandered over to the monster in her living room. Shit. As much as she didn't want to admit it, a homicidal maniac would be a Godsend in a situation like this. And her stubbornness concerning Mr. Johnny C. didn't run so deep that she would throw away her life simply to spite him. Son of a bitch. She shot him a scrupulous glance and saw that he was tentatively watching her from a safe distance. Well, he seemed earnest enough. She'd take care of him later.
"Fine. I still have a score to settle with you though. Don't forget." She paused, the word "forget" suddenly reminding her of a very real problem she'd actually taken her mind off of for a few seconds. But to her surprise, Chaos was merely grinning at them, flipping a few tentacles back and forth as it cracked its knuckles and elbows.
Now this is a pleasant surprise. I can't believe you idiotic Voices would actually bring your mortal straight to me to save this... girl. Well, if I can't have one, you can't either.
Out of the corner of her eye Devi saw something move at an eye-watering speed and suddenly felt herself yanked off her feet. A writhing mass of tentacles smashed down on and splintered the ground she used to be standing on. Boggling slightly, she suddenly realized that Nny had grabbed her around the waist and was now sailing through the air with her. Understandably she did the first thing that came to mind.
She punched him in the face.
Thrown off balance, they both crashed to the floor. Devi pulled her fist back again, while Nny scrambled to his feet, clutching one hand to his cheekbone. "Shit!" He glanced at his hand, checking for any sign of blood. "What the hell did you do that for?!"
"Don't even think about touching me unless you care for a re-enactment!" she shouted back.
"Damn it, Devi, how am I supposed to-" he paused, blinked, and suddenly threw himself at her again, forcing her to the ground as she yelled and began to kick and punch in an attempt to dislodge his grip. Meanwhile another tentacle whizzed above their heads.
This spectacle continued for about five minutes, him tossing them both around the room, her fighting for all she was worth, and both pausing every few seconds to yell insults and justifications at each other. Missing being turned into a human pancake for the twentieth time, Devi half-heartedly pulled on a fistful of spiky black hair. The ritual was tiring both of them out, if Nny's less violent flying leaps were any indication. A bit of a shame really that all those welts and the blood under her fingernails weren't caused by the fucking monster that was smashing up her apartment, but an ex-girlfriend instead. A little funny really. Or not. Why the hell does he keep doing this? she wondered as she released her grip and rolled away again. That bullshit about wanting to help me? Yeah right. Nny was a homicidal psycho. Period.
You're judging too harshly again. You're not trying to see what else he could be.
Damn it, she KNEW what he could be - Punch. Kick. Elbow. - Intellectual, smart, and philosophical. But he was a psycho who wanted to kill her. End of story.
What about the phone call?
Kick. Kick. Eyejab. Bullshit.
How do you justify this then? How hard is it to believe that he still cares for you? Even after everything you've done, whether it be seven years ago or right this minute. Even if it is screwed-up and even if you don't want it, his loyalty remains. The least you could do is accept his help, remember him as the person you thought he was, and stop acting like such a fucking BITCH.
"Fine." She slowly withdrew her fist from his left shoulder.
He winced slightly. "Fine what?"
She stared into the brown eyes before her, one squinted slightly in pain. He did mean it. "I believe you. Don't expect me to apologize; I won't. But I appreciate what you're doing, I'll give you that much."
Looking slightly surprised, Nny nodded once at her once and smiled slightly, suddenly frowning again as he closed his eye completely. "But… did you have to be so rough about it?"
"Yes. Think of it as payback."
