The cruelest dream, reality
Summary: Usagi dreams of her time as a blissfully innocent teenager, and rages against fate for taking it away. She wants out(death- come to me), but struggles deal with the fact that there is no way out, because there is nowhere else to go(no death). Of course, something(someone) comes and changes everything. No Mamoru-baka, or senshis in this fic, Deal with it.
Tsukino Usagi chucked a rock into the still lake, using her anger to throw it farther then normal. She was seventeen, but already she had decided that she was tired of life. Too much had happened in the last three years of her life. Perhaps it was longer, since she had gone forward and backward in time enough to confuse even Mizuno Ami, genius of Juuban High. Either way, the thought of death was one she had contemplated for months(lifetimes) now.
It's prom night. So many would ask why I am here, instead of socializing like the ditz I am believed to be. She laughed at herself, at her friends, and at fate who decided that she should be this way. She threw another rock at the water, wishing she could throw away her anger and frustration as easily as that. She had over a thousand(eternal) years of emotion to vent, and there was no force on earth that would equal that.
Dammit, I didn't want this! She thought, staring at the glowing rock beside her. She refused to call it anything remotely complimenting. It was an inanimate object, but she didn't care. She still hated it with all the passion she could muster. If only there was some way of destroying it...(without destroying myself)
She threw another rock, wishing that it was the glowing one beside her. But, unfortunately, that wouldn't solve anything, and the damned thing would only come back to her. You know, she thought at the glowing rock, before I ever knew about you, all I had to think about was school, eating, and video games. No saving the world crap like nowadays. No wars. Damn, I feel so old.
She grimaced. She was old, she just didn't look it. Oh, how she would laugh to see the look on her parent's faces if she were to tell them that their daughter was actually a princess from a legendary kingdom from a thousand years in the past. What a laugh that would get, but she no longer laughed at all.
Again, she cursed fate and destiny as she threw another stone into the lake. Why was she unable to break the hold of fate, when the rest of her former friends had? Why had her prince managed to escape the hold of destiny, into the relief of death, when she was forced to remain in this life, this planet? She railed silently at all the Gods she could name, and at a few she could not. Her friends had followed her former love into death. She longed for death, but not the death that awaited her.
She was cursed with the dream of madmen. She was cursed with a dream of kings, emperors, a dream that she had never had. A dream she called a nightmare. She was cursed with eternal life, only an endless cycle of rebirth and reincarnation. Some life. All I do is die, or get in the way of some psyco who only wants to get this stupid rock or take over the universe, or all freakin' three.
Her first friend among the senshis, Mizuno Ami, had passed on two months ago, when she had gotten in the way of a stray bullet from an Oz soldier. Mako-chan had died fighting against her captors, and though Usagi knew no more, she had felt the tall Amazon's death clearly, and painfully. Her best friend among any of the senshis, Hino Rei, had died over two years ago, trapped in her own shrine as it burned down. The last of her inner senshis had died last week, as she fought to stay with her husband as he was taken away by soldiers. She had been shot in the head, and her body left to rot. Usagi had been the one to find her, moments before the beautiful soldier of love had passed on. Aino Minako had only looked into Usagi's too old eyes, and said "This is it for us, Usa-chan. We are not coming again..."
There was only one interpretation of that remark, and Usagi knew it all too well. At least I know that I will be alone, rather then wandering around my entire life(lives) searching for people who will never again be alive.
nothing's free
longing for what used to be
still it's hard
hard to see
fragile lives
shattered dreams
Even Haruka, Michiru, Hotaru and Setsuna are gone. I didn't believe that they would ever concern themselves enough with Earth to ever be caught in it's wars. But this war is not like the others, a voice whispered in her head. This one has ruined what the mortals had built for themselves without our help. Perhaps Galaxia-chan had the right of it, however many years ago it has been. Maybe humans are a mistake. But somehow, she couldn't believe that. After all the dimensions, galaxies and dreams she had traveled, she found it difficult to believe that humans were not worthy of life. They had surmounted so much, (and no matter to the fact that they had set up most of it themselves) that maybe they as much right as the senshis to life, or other life forms.
Ironic how it's the Sailor Senshis that are dieing, and there are far less of us, she thought sardonically. She had lost contact with Galaxia in this life, and she supposed this reality was too far from Galaxia's home system.
She was pulled out of her thoughts as she heard a noise coming from the bushes behind her. She turned her head slowly, to see a boy her age burst out of the bushes as if the hounds of mortal hell were after him. She laughed inwardly at the expression, knowing there was no such thing for her, no hell or heaven. She also wondered curiously why this boy wasn't at the prom, seeing as he wore the same uniform she did.
The boy had a long chestnut braid that swung madly behind him, and intense purple eyes that made her think of Hotaru, the beautiful soldier of Death. He was no taller then she, and he stopped abruptly when he saw her. He evidently wasn't expecting anyone to be there, but he threw a nervous glance behind him into the trees and bushes that surround the lake. He must have heard something, because he grimaced.
"I do not know what you are doing here, but you must leave now. Come with me, I will keep you safe." He said no more, but he grabbed her hand, pulling her upright quickly. He pulled her with him as he dove off the edge of her vantage point, down towards the water.
Usagi wondered at his audacity. How could he possibly think that he could do that to a complete stranger? She had opened her mouth to say something, but received a glare from the boy- a young man, really, his eyes were too old for a seventeen year old- as if he had sensed she had been about to speak. They landed in a bush near the edge of the water, and he quickly rolled her under it, with him.
"Don't say a word," he whispered tersely. Usagi saw no harm in not complying, and so turned her attention to her bare arms. She had only been wearing her school uniform, whose short sleeves were only a light cotton fabric. The scrapes on her arms were lightly bleeding dark red blood, a few shades too dark to be human. As she watched, the cuts closed, and she brushed off the now-dried blood. The man who had grabbed her was also watching her, and she groaned to wonder what he was now thinking. But he said nothing, so she turned her face away, gazing again at the lake.
When they heard a gun shot ring through the woods above them, Usagi ignored his order and said, quietly still, "Oz no senshi ka?" [An Oz soldier?]
She received a glare from the boy/man that reminded Usagi of Rei-chan at her worst. It also reminded her of Mamoru-baka at the last time she had seen him. "Takusan no senshi" [Many soldiers] he whispered shortly, and she got the idea that she had better shut her mouth.
She stayed silent, but not idle. She reached out with her mind, searching for those who were hunting the man. She found them, and allowed herself to be shocked. There was nearly an entire army after this man! She wondered if he knew there were so many, but decided against saying anything.
She continued to 'watch' the Oz soldiers, until they were out of hearing range. She told the man that, and he nodded slowly, but she could see that he did not trust her. What could possibly have happened to this boy to turn him so suspicious?(Still it's hard| hard to see| fragile lives | shattered dreams) I may not be human but I do look it. He stood up slowly, drawing away from the bush. Suddenly, he dived into the lake, surprising Usagi.
She watched him swim away, until the murky waters hid him. If he was so eager to get away, why didn't he say so? She wondered. She decided to follow him, just for the fun of it.
She stepped out onto the lake, wandering off in the direction the braided boy had gone. She hoped that no one was around, because though she didn't particularly care what the humans thought of her, awkward questions would be asked if they saw a woman walking on water.
He went... thataway, she thought, turning west into the setting sun. The glorious light of the burning star blinded her for a moment, but she closed her eyes and continued on. Why the hell am I doing this, again? she asked herself. I must be going soft. Rei would laugh her ass off to hear that. (Longing for what used to be)
Something splashed her, forcing her to open her eyes once more. She blinked long eyelashes, then widened her eyes in shock as a large thing flew away right before her eyes. Her quick glimpse showed only gleaming metal, that looked slightly... humanoid. (Now I can go crazy) I've seen a flying machine with a glowing scythe in its hand. Yup, definitely time to go insane. If she didn't already know it was technically impossible for that to happen to her, she would have believed it.
Perhaps something to do with the young man I was chasing? she asked herself curiously. There was no sign beneath the water that the braided man was still there, and the water sprites said no more about the intruder. It really is shame I don't have Ami-chan's ability with the water creatures.
She returned back to shore, and to her previous spot. But when she had gotten comfortable again, she realized that she could no longer concentrate on her thoughts. Just great. And the godsdamned rock is still here.
Usagi sighed as she rubbed her temples, and returned her gaze to the computer screen. The laptop had been one of her few indulgements to technology in her small apartment, as she had no real need to eat, or have heat. She wondered how she had changed so much from the ditz who had been stuffing her face at every opportunity. Perhaps I grew up? she thought wryly, knowing it was the answer.
She surfed around, searching for recent news. She rarely paid any attention to the news broadcasts, at least not since the blonde ditz claiming to be the lost Peacecraft princess had begun to take over the screens. Usagi knew that peace and pacifism was a foolish dream for fools, and did not consider herself to be a fool.
Her attention caught on an article describing something called Gundams. Gundams... I've heard that before. Something from a careless Oz soldier? She browsed the article, and any others pertaining to the Gundams curiously. She found a few blurry photos of them, and smiled when she recognized them. That's definitely what I saw.
But there was disconcerting trend to all of the articles. Oz had control over the news network, and the underlying message to any news reports on the Gundams or their pilots(Pilots?) was that they should be captured at any cost. Maybe Oz has a little extra information then? Usagi smiled wickedly, and accessed the main Oz website. She explored it, before realizing what she wanted wasn't there.
But Usagi didn't learn nothing from all the hours she had spent on the thing. She carefully hacked into the Oz database, and pulled up the files on the Gundams. There were five, but she already knew that. Apparently numbered that way, as well. Either someone was really unoriginal when they named these five, or Oz doesn't know their real names. (Nothing's free) There was barely more information on the Gundams themselves, but seeing as they were large bodies of metal she was not too surprised.
But her interest did light up as she read the file on 02. Piloting the Gundam that looked exactly like the one she had seen, briefly, his physical description suited him exactly as well. Curious. So maybe he did have reason to have an entire army on his heels. I wonder what he did? (If he lives?)(Shattered dreams)
After reading the rest of the files, she shut down her computer, double-checking to make sure her little activity hadn't been noticed. That had only happened once, and she had never left anything unchecked now. She would go search for 02 tomorrow. Oz had only a general idea where the five pilots were holed up, but she would be able to find them using a better sort of radar. Nothing beats magic, not even fancy technology. She smirked. That boy-young man- would regret pulling her off a cliff, not matter how small. After all, the Queen of the Moon(Selenity-mama) and the entire Sol solar system deserved a bit more courtesy then that.
Yes I know that was beyond freakishly weird. Blame it on inspiration, and listening to my brothers music through two floors and a whole lot of rooms. Meh. There is not much plot going for this, but I do have an idea. Any helpful hints would be helpful, however. Please read + review. Should I continue (sequel?)
