IN THE END
Category: Angst, Romance, Drama
Spoilers: All books
Rating: let's say PG-13 for language, violence and disturbing
themes.
Summary: Some years after CoS, Ginny is reflecting about her relationship
to men in general, and Tom in particular. And it brings back very painful
memories. Not a happy ficlet.
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by
JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books,
Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being
made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. Don't sue, thanks.
Author's Note: English is not my mother tongue, there may be mistakes.
Please be kind!
Men are stronger. Men are evil. Men always hurt you. But in the end, it doesn't
really matter.
I've always had a soft spot for handsome men. But handsome men are. not nice.
(In fact I'm not saying ugly men are better. No. They just don't have a chance
to hurt you. Period.). Boys like Malfoy are the living proof of it. But Malfoy
is not the only one. Oh no. And not the worst I could think of. Oh no.
I wish there was a spell to mend broken hearts.
Men are stronger. Men are evil. Men are stronger because they are evil. Men can
force you to do what they want. They can even force you to want to do what they
want. Men are deceiving. Men always lie. Men say they love you because they
need your trust. Because they don't care. Because they find it funny when you
cry and beg. They love showing they're in control.
How I hate those sick power games. How I hate men.
Can somebody hurt you and love you at the same time?
I remember everything. You listened to me, you lied to me, you helped me, you used
me, you kissed me, you beat me. You left me crying and bleeding, lying on the
floor, countless times. You used to say I deserved it. I didn't. And I hate you
for that. But that's ok, now I know there can't be light without darkness. Now
I know there can't be light. Or can there? I remember that you would always end
up wiping blood and tears off my face with your sleeve, calling me your
princess and telling me not to cry, because you just lost your temper and
everything would be all right in the end. Like in some fucking fairy tale. But
you were no charming prince, Tom. The charming prince is not supposed to insult
or beat the princess when he "loses his temper", is he?
Come back Tom, I will let you hurt me. Again and again. Come back. Please.
Sometimes I don't remember if what I'm feeling is hate, or love, or both. Maybe
I wouldn't love you so much if I didn't hate you.
You certainly think you've been being a gentleman or something, because apart
from some kissing and groping not much happened. Damn you! It makes me sick. In
your twisted and distorted logic, I should be thankful that you didn't want
more. Right, you bastard?
In my even more twisted and distorted mind, I'm not, for I wish you did.
Men are stronger. Men are evil. Men always hurt you. But in the end, it doesn't
really matter.
