She was just walking, cigar in hand as she strolled along the grounds.

The sunlight was warm, adding a extra sweetness to the cool of the air. It was times like these that she truly relished the fact that Alucard couldn't come out in the mid of day........stillness such as now was what she craved, so vastly different from the void of nothing called 'office.'

She smiled just slightly.

Office.

Place of sanctuary that doubled as a comfortably boring prison.

Her.

Cold hearted ruthless Protestant bitch who had the care of a vampire and a Angel of Death,now controller of three very valuable, very dangerous pawns.

Integral took another deep puff from her cigar, feeling the sweet smoke curl out her nostrils.

Life was good.....for now.

The nun had admitted what she had needed to know about the structural weaknesses of Iscariot. The place may seem grand on the outside, but it had weak points that were usable to advantage. However, the biggest of all had to be downstairs.

In the depths of Iscariot, there load some 100 barrels of gunpowder, probably left over from the first World War......they were still there, stored in their air and water tight casks, left for whatever emergency there was inflicted on the organization. She stared thoughtfully at the end of her cigar, and took another puff.

One spark from this cigar could possibly equal a explosion large enough to take out whatever troops Iscariot had. The troops often huddled and stayed there until they were released like pit bulls from their leash into the fighting ring. Men would die, this was true, but then again, it would make up for the all the damage they had done to her own. Captain Galice had been a good commander....it was hard to replace him after his untimely death.

She had already called Pip Bernadotte and the Wild Geese into action after miss Victoria's appeal for him. She had been surprised as the little vampiress practiclly begged her to bring the braided captain to their aid, the desperate gleam in her eye pitiful. Integral had tried to insist that with the help of the top three agents of Iscariot would be good enough thank you very much. Besides, didn't she hate that Pip boy? The one with the Eskimo song and the tendency to leave things around and well as steal much, much more valuable items? The one who led a strike because of the lack of beer in the fridge and two hot meals only and no snacks rule she tried to apply?

But in the end she had relented. She had started by instructing Walter to place beer in every possible location where he could find that would appeal to the good captain...lots of it.

She had sent a letter to Maxwell....how surprised he would be, to find out his favorites had come to them only to be captured and helping the ones they hated most! Laughing softly at the imagined expression on his face, she stubbed the ciagr out on a brick and headed back the way she came.How ironic it was, now that for once she had the positive and total controlling upper hand.

It was about time for once.

"Enrico Maxwell, care to join me at the museum?"
----------------------------

"Have you ever realized the elements of punishment?"

Seras looked up from her magazine, and narrowed her eyes at her frowning new Master.

"Have you ever realized that girls don't like to be watched while their toenails dry?" She wiggled her toes with pieces of cotton stuck between each toe, painted the same red as her lipstick and nails.

He ignored her, and snatched the magazine from her hands.

"And this one is about......a young prince falls in love with his beautiful serving wench,and woos his way into her heart by singing under her window."

Seras lowered her lids dreamily, and smiled. "Isn't that romanatic?"

The priest grunted, and threw the magazine back onto her bed.

"That isn't romance child. That's called 'over-doing it.' Besides, judging from the picture, that young man has to have a large voice to make up for that small nugget."

Seras picked up the magazine, and begin to read again. "You have no concept of romance." she sighed. "None at all."
She pointed to a passage and thrust it at Anderson.

"Read."

He sighed, and began to read out loud.

"His voice was like the rise of angels into my innocent soul, lifting me into a rapture of doves and white daisys sprung up in the virginity of snow.I swooned a million times, wishing it was into his arms I lay and wish to sleep and die....."

The priest looked up and stared at her quietly.

"See? Now THAT's romance."

".....BWHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA I cannot even believe I even read this! White daisys??!! Doves??? SWOONING????!! What a laugh this is my child. It's funny to watch you slowly kill off every qualm of your intelligence by reading this drivel!"

"I hate you."

"That hurt my child! In fact, I must make amends and heal that little wound by reading this to Sir Hellsing...no, make that to everyone...now let's see if this little nuggest or I have a more powerful voice.....that will make you swoon into a million raptures of daisys." he finished sarcasticlly.

"Don't!"

Already he was runnign down the hill, this time reading from another story. She hopped after him ,trying to not let the cotton between her toes fall out or one of her breasts to fall out of teh tanktop she was wearing.

"And he kissed with the fires of a rejected heart that had been hurt in the past , and I could already feel his hands all over me, on my tender young breasts and my...HAH...MY FLOWER PETALS!"

The priest began to rip pages out, and threw a few to Walter and yumiko who were just trying to get out of the way.

"There! There! Read this old man and maybe you'll gain a few tricks in your seducing of poor miss Takagi! Amen to the Son,the Father and the Holy Ghost if you suceed and amen to her if she can bear a wrinkled body!"

Walter trembled with rage as he crumpled the pages in his hands, and Yumiko patted his hand.

"There there...I know perfectly well what he says is not true....put those wires away!"she scolded as she now slapped his hand.

Anderson pranced along the hallway, and shoved a few at Pip, huddling in his (un)succesful hiding place.

"Here boy...you may use these since she enjoys them so very much." The pirets glared at the red faced Seras, and rip a few in half. "Oh dear...oops. Now you have to tape them together again!"

He threw back and head and laughed.

"HEINKEL! He's over here!"

"Ah shit...."

Anderson barely avoided Heinkel's running form as he speared pages to the walls. He slid some under the door of Sir Hellsing's door,in case she ever needed ideas if she and the vampire were ever alone together. Oh dear oh dear, such a wonderful day and such a wonderful feeling of justiceand such selfish satisfaction!

He turned around, and patted a panting Seras on the head roughly, pulling some of her locks.

"Now you'll think twice before trying to trick me child....I KNOW. I know about your little scheme with that Pip boy...I know everything and will forever know and spy on you until you give yourself to me,or until I die trying to kill Enrico Maxwell.Either way, you will die as well, and be still followed by me after death." he hissed into her face, a strained smile pasted on."Now say it."

"Never." she growled.

"Never what who?"

"Never will I follow you."

"And who am I?"

".....don't even start."

He grabbed a lock of hair and tugged on it sharply, and she winced slightly.

"Who am I?"

"My Master." she whispered.

He smiled and patted her cheek softly.

"Smart girl."

The look of rage was replaced by concern as he stared into her face.

"My child, you scarely eaten! Have you resisted the temptation of blood for so long?

"Y..yes."

His stiff body relaxed, and he whipped off a glove and drew a small dagger out.

"Was it for me is all I ask."

"Yes" she lied.

The concern was replaced by delight, and he drew the dagger across his finger, too excited to even notice how deep it sank in. She winced at the blood, spurting into the air while he babbled on.

"It is just a little bit..you must drink it before it closes in a minute or two.But it's just a little and you have done well so far." He brought the finger to her lips.

"Just a little is all I ask."

"No....no." she backed away.

He frowned, and brought it closer. The tangy smell of it hit her like a hammer, knocking her nearly senseless.So rich....so full of health...so delicious it would be....then she remembered who she was taking it from.

"Drink."

She smacked his hand away, breaking from her trance and she ran down the hall.

"NO!"

"It's closing...." he yelled after her.

"NEVER!"

He was left standing there stunned, and he stared at the quickly closing wound on his finger. Droplets still remained, and he stuck his tongue out to lap them away.

"Hmmm....thought it would be somewhat juicier.....but it is closed...this wound and the Gates of Paradise if she does not relent...but how can one dance her away from Night and bring her back to Day?"

He looked around dully at the destruction he alone had caused, and settled his gaze onto a ripped paper. The picture of the pirate and the big bosomed maiden still taunted him.

Why, by the use of really bad magazines of course!